Loud music, dazzling lights, party people around, dancing at the dance floor—this is the scene that welcomed me when I stepped into the bar.

My gaze roamed around, finding someone. I went on a group of girls that could catch the attention of anyone who enters the bar. They are my friends and currently, they were so busy drinking and of course, a thing that’ll never get out of the frame, flirting.

“Hey, Kira!” One shouted my name and waved her hand. Smiling, I make my way towards them.

When I arrived, Kass instantly offered me a shot glass that contains a hard drink, what a pleasant welcome. I took what she handed and drank it for once, not minding the hot sensation it gave to my throat.

“Chill, we’ll stay long here.” Freya chuckled.

“For what? Not long enough I’ll still get drunk,” I answered while holding another glass of liquor.

We were having fun and not long enough, a group of boys went in our direction.

“Hey, shall we dance?” One tall, dark man asked and offered his hand to Freya.

They all got their partners and looked to me when I decided to decline someone’s offer.

“I’m fine here, go on.” I drank the liquor.

I just watched their back until it got out of my sight when they joined the sea of people dancing to the pop music that was playing.

I rolled my eyes and turned my gaze around. I stopped and eyed at the side view of a man. He’s drinking a bottle of liquor even though he already drank too much. Honestly, he looks so wasted right now.

I don’t know why am I feeling pity or why do I have this feeling that I want to comfort him or whatever this is. I stood up and haven’t refrained to walk in his direction. I sat on a vacant seat beside him but he didn’t notice my presence because he’s still drinking.

“Hey,” I tried to get his attention.

“What do you want?” He straight forward asked the time he faced me.

He made me look at his facial features. His white skin; his beautiful sleepy eyes which is an effect of the alcohol; his red nose which I know is because of crying, I can see his tears’ path; his pink lips, so kissable. This man attracts me.

I gulped and chuckled a bit before I started to speak.

“I just want to be with you here since I noticed that you’re alone,” I answered and focused my gaze on the dance floor, nervously sweating cold.

He laughed which made me look at him with a creased forehead and nearly straight eyebrows. He’s handsome but somehow, he’s kooky. He just laughed and laughed until it turned to tears.

He put his palms on his face as if he’s trying to cover it though I already saw it.

“You’re broken inside,” I concluded as I saw sadness in his eyes a while ago.

He looked at me and smiled before uttering, “So broken.”

He just cried silently. After a while, I had the guts to introduce myself.

“Kira,” I introduced and offered my hand for a handshake.

“Finn.”

As his soft palms touched mine, I could feel a different sensation, as if there’s an electric current that connects us both.

That day, I met Finn and we became friends but I know that I have had feelings for him ever since I first saw him, but what can I do? I can’t help but keep it to myself for our friendship not to be ruined.

I knew that he goes to that bar often, so am I. It became our meeting place, where we first met.

I was peacefully eating my lunch when suddenly, my phone rang. It was Finn. I answered the call.

“Yes, Finn? What can I do for you that you can’t do by yourself that we can do together?” I exclaimed and chuckled.

“Meet me at the bar later, Kira. 6:30 PM.”

“Wait, are you crying again?” My eyebrows knitted as I can hear him trying to stop his sobs.

Finn cries too much, he looks like a gay—Kira? You’re telling that but you love him. I shrugged my head.

He didn’t answer, I know that he’s crying and it hurts me so bad.

“Fine, same place.” I hung up the call.

It has been hours already but I’m still thinking about what his problem is. These past few days, he looks okay, he frequently smiles and laughs then right now, he’s crying. Suspicious.

I looked at the clock that made me stop walking. Yes, I’ve been walking here the whole time, back and forth and I guess, I also roamed around my house?

I sighed and wore clothes suitable for the place I’ll go to—the bar. After putting on red lipstick, I immediately went to my car and drove myself to the bar.

The time I got out of my car, I almost run just to see him as soon as possible. When I got in, the same scenario as we first met, it again welcomed me.

Not far away, I saw him in the same spot. I walked towards him. Like our first meeting, he’s crying while drinking hard liquors.

“What happened, Finn?”

He answered, “I saw her with somebody new.” He chuckled.

“She looks so happy. Happier than I made her happy,” he added.

My heart is like at the edge of the cliff, suddenly pushed by someone or by the wind then fell on the ground with broken pieces. After all this time, I thought he already forgot his ex but I got it wrong.

“I think I’m still into her, it hurts me seeing somebody else holding her hand, someone else who hugs her tightly. It’s not me who gives her flowers anymore, there’s no more us.”

My tears fell, it hurts hearing those from the man you love. Why is he so numb? Is he dumb?

“I still love—” I cut him off.

“Finn, why are you so numb?” I asked that made him look at me.

I smiled.

“Finn, I did make you feel uncountable times that I love you but why can’t you feel it?” I looked at his goddamn mesmerising eyes, I can see shock written all over his face.

“She broke you, I completed you, you broke me,” I calmly said as tears continuously fell like a river without an ending.

“It hurts, I did all to make you feel happy, to make you feel that you are loved, for you to love me back, but I was so disappointed in this type of outcome.” I laughed to hide the pain that I’m feeling.

“I regret falling for you, Finn. While you’re being torn to pieces seeing her with someone else, here am I, asking for the love you can’t reciprocate.”

“Don’t worry, I won’t ask for it again. Just let me love you from afar, forget you tomorrow, don’t ever show up to me again.” I left with tears streaming down my cheeks. I can do nothing, she’s irreplaceable.