Shawns POV :) (part 1)

I come off stage with a huge smile plastered onto my face, I've never been happier and I couldn't ask for better fans, every night I walk off the stage feeling as though this is so surreal, like a dream that could end any moment. A dream I'm happy to live forever!
I spot Eva waiting for me with a bag in her hands and after greeting the rest of the crew I walk over to her, we exchange a few pleasantries telling one another about how much we enjoy each other's voice, her comments making me blush slightly- which I really hope doesn't show on my face! And Eva really gets my attention when she holds up a bag of muffins, with such an adorable smile on her face. I don't think she realises how beautiful she really is- without even trying! And it hurts me even more that she's with a douche like Noah who hurts her so much. I shake my anger off and reach for her muffins, which soon turns into us chasing one another down the various corridors of the arena, when I remember my plan that I had set up, and the car should be parked around the back.

Eva is still a little bit behind me so I stand back making sure I don't get noticed and regather my breath, when I hear her light footsteps coming closer I get ready to jump out, and eventually when I do her reaction is hilarious! Getting back to my task at hand I inform Eva and head out to the back where I see the sleek car parked up, the plan I set up is working!

I really hope she likes it. No, I hope she loves it! I feel the need to apologise for being so rude, especially to someone so kind, she never really did anything to me only caught me at the wrong time when I was in a bad mood, even if I didn't show it with all my smiles to my fans, the veneer would peel away when Eva was around like I was unable to keep up an act around her, I just had to be me, and for some crazy reason she doesn't hate me. Well, I hope she doesn't.
Anywho, after regretting my choices and feeling as though I had hurt Eva badly I rang my family, they always knew the right direction to point me in, even if I had to believe in myself and push myself to be able to do it they always gave me a kick start, even Aaliyah- once I got past all her teasing. They helped so much when I rang them, helping me to organise and devise a plan and also reassuring me that everything would be okay, and according to my mum we always tend to hurt the people we love, without intending to. The only problem is, I don't love Eva do I?

No. I can't. Sure I like her, I like her a lot, and it's the the type of like that you have in the playground when you're 5, it's the type of like you get when you're 18 or older, when you have sense to know who the one is.

But it's not Eva, it can't be, she's already with someone else.

Snapping back to reality I open the car door, guiding Eva in as the gentleman I am and clamber to the drivers seat taking us to our destination. Once in the car my attention is focused on driving and Eva slowly becomes more interested about what is going on outside, making me chuckle when she asks how long the journey is going to be only ten minutes in, I picked somewhere that is an hour away so we could have time in the car but at this rate keeping her entertained for an hour might be more difficult than I thought. I'm snapped out of my thoughts once again when a concert erupts between us, easy and flowing, I smile partly to myself because it's never been like this, not even with Lauren- we spoke everyday but eventually we ran out of things to say to one another- and I smile partly because Eva entertains me, I like talking to her and being in her company in general.

Not knowing why, I bring up the topic of Noah "How are things with Noah?" I asks, which I can tell throws her off guard slightly as her facial expressions changes.

"Um, okay I guess." She replies seeming uncertain.

"You sure?" God I feel like I'm interrogating her, why do I care so much?

"I suppose so, I miss him but I can't help feel like I'm holding him back."

"From what?" Her answer interests me, and reminds me of my song but of course I push that thought aside and continue to probe.

"It doesn't matter,"

"You know, if you're not happy you should have the right to move on." I suggests, trying to be gentle, not wanting to seem like I'm forcing her into anything.

"I'm happy, I love him." I know I should be happy, it's the right thing but for some reason her answer makes me feel slightly deflated. I definitely have no chance with her, not that it mattered right?

"As long as you're happy," I say, not meaning it at all but it's the right thing and that's what matters. I need to be less selfish, put Eva in front of my own feelings.

She glances at me and offers me a smile, making her look as beautiful as ever, I want to give her the most heat warming smile I can but I can't force my face to mould into anything but a tight one in return once hoping that what I'm feeling underneath the facade doesn't seep through. We soon return to our comfortable silence as I loose myself in my world of thoughts, thinking about anything and everything possible as Eva slowly drifts off into a peaceful slumber.

I pull up into our designated destination hoping that everything was how I wanted it, of course I would have loved if I could have set it up myself but then I wouldn't have been able to play at the show tonight.

"Eva," I say in a cross between my normal voice and a whisper "Wake up, we're here."

She gets up looking sleepy as she rubs her eyes, looking extremely adorable, I know I shouldn't feel or think like this but it's like she's taking over my mind, my thoughts, I've only met the girl for crying out loud! I get out of the car and walk around to her door to assist her out.

"You're not planning to murder me are you?" She asks when I open her car door and hold my hand out for her to take.

"As tempting as that is, not today. I have better plans," I say teasing her, who knew it could be so fun! And the look on her face, a mix between annoyance and amusement, makes it worth it!
I direct us around a small corner, around a tree and I feel Eva stop dead in her tracks tracks taking in the beautiful sight in front of us. What I made sure was set up is a small picnic blanket set up with some lovely food, fairy lights dangling from the trees adding a nice ambience and making it seem so cosy, I knew she loved it already but she hadn't even seen the best part!

"This is beautiful Shawn," she says with a smile that could melt all the snow in the universe, one that makes my heart warm up and makes me feel so fuzzy inside.

"This isn't the best part, do you see the screen there? It's going to be playing Harry Potter for us." I say pointing in the direction of the screen, satisfied with how it's turned out, I owe the guys big time!

"It's perfect," She beams at me and I take it as my chance to grab hold of her hand and drag her to the picnic blanket, as we sit down and grab our snacks the Goblet of Fire starts to play our attention focused on the screen. Well, my attention focused on Eva, unable to draw my eyes away from her and no matter how hard I try when I look away my eyes having a mind of their own trail back to her, drinking in all her features.
As the movie proceeds, we somehow draw closer together to one another and as it starts to get cold I throw the single blanket that there is over us making us cuddle together. It feels so perfect, so right which only makes my current situation harder. I'm starting to fall for a girl who is already taken, madly in love with some douche. I push aside my thoughts for once, and let myself enjoy this with her head resting on my chest and my arms around her shoulders pulling her as close to me as possible, this right now is everything I would have ever wanted. Well not everything, the only thing I want is to be able to call Eva mine. But it would be so wrong considering she's in a serious relationship, so in this moment I decide to push her away. Make myself fall less and eventually not fall at all, it would be easier for both of us then right?
I just needed to enjoy this one moment. Act like we're a couple, I mean if you saw us right now you would think we are. Act like Eva loves me, it's the only thing I could ever really ask for. Act like the stunning girl in my arms is mine and only mine.
However in reality, we are not a couple - she probably hates me, and I don't blame her, I just want to prove her wrong, let her know the real me not the guy I've been acting like recently. Secondly, she doesn't love me she never would she's infatuated with the Noah dude, I can already tell he's going to break her heart, I just hope I'm around to comfort her, I want to protect her at all costs. Finally she's not mine, she's taken and what makes it worse is that I'm going to have to push all my feelings aside. Let her be happy.
I can't help but feel elated as she snuggles closer to me and at the same time as much as a want to savour this moment I feel extremely tired and feel myself drifting away into a peaceful slumber.

♡
Hey guys!! :) This was kinda strange writing from Shawns POV hahs let me know how it turns out and if you guys like it!!
This is also the longest chapter I've written ever! So part 2 will hopefully be up soon!!
Thank you all for your support! Love you all☺️❤️