Okay, this got angsty quickly. I originally intended to publish a fluffy chapter but no, this one came out. Enjoy!

Also, E*dgame spoilers, so yay!

oOo

Usually, if James felt hot tears stream down his cheeks he'd wipe them away or excuse himself, since he couldn't display much emotion, being in the army. 

But he didn't care. 

His body was rigid, crouching in front of Tony, whose eyes were open, but lifeless, the enthusiasm and sarcasm gone. 

Forever. 

He didn't speak. He kept a firm hand on Tony's burnt shoulder, tears dripping off of his chin and onto his husband's nanotech suit. 

Lifeless.

He could hear Pepper and the kid coming from behind, going to say goodbye to their fallen friend and James stood up, slowly, stiffly, and took a step back, trying to calm himself down. 

It wasn't real. 

It was. And James could tell. He wanted to look away, but that would be rude - cruel. So, he focused his gaze on Tony's lifeless body, tears streaming down his cheeks. 

The army would sure fire him for this, for displaying such emotion. He didn't care. He felt people walk behind him, going to say their goodbyes or ask he was okay, but he didn't answer - he couldn't. 

Because James. 

Couldn't. 

Breathe.

oOo

The funeral had an empty feel to it. 

He stood by Pepper and Happy, shaking from the fact that Tony was gone. 

Forever. 

That his body was being cremated and sent out to the sea, and James wouldn't ever see him again.

Lifeless. 

At the service, James caught sight of Tony's first arc reactor. Tony Stark Has A Heart. James wanted to scream and kick and run away and delve into the possibility that Tony was alive. 

It wasn't real. 

Around him, a half hour later, people moved off, mourning around the lake house. But James didn't leave his spot, keeping his gaze focused on his husband's first arc reactor - the one he had given him after Tony demanded to have it thrown away. 

"You've gotta join us, bud," Happy murmured behind him, and James jumped. But he wouldn't - he couldn't.

Because James.

Couldn't.

Move.

oOo

"Hey, Rhodey, how's everything going?" 

The voice belonged to Steve. The person James definitely did not want to talk to right now.

He wrinkled his nose at the use of his nickname - the one Tony gave him. But he wasn't here, and he wouldn't ever be again. He had left. 

Forever. 

James stood up from his seat. "He trusted you, you know?" James snapped, walking towards the soldier. "He trusted you and you betrayed him!" James hated the way he was speaking in past tense about Tony. 

Lifeless. 

"Rhodes, I'm-I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to." Steve murmured, stuttering a little. James scowled and walked off, to Pepper, to Happy. 

The people he could trust. In the distance, James saw a blur. Tony! His heart leaped and he walked towards the blur in the distance, but it disappeared. His face fell as he realised what happened.

It wasn't real. 

James sat down on a bench, staring at the grass. So full of life. 

Unlike Tony.