i got a little carried away while writing this and it's over 3,600 words

also sorry i'm not updating what i say i will and keep posting random shit

for some reason tho i've gotten really into parley. i don't know why lmao.

but here's some fuckin parley,

sorry if you don't like it.

~unedited~

Peter and Harley are best friends.

Who flirt with each other a whole damn lot.

Almost everything that comes out of ones mouth to the other is some sort of flirtation.

Sometime along the way they realized it wasn't just harmless flirting any more.

And neither of them know what the fuck to do about it.

~

"Hey darlin' " Peter felt arms snake around his waist.

"What's up, boo?" Peter asked Harley, removing his arms from his waist and turning to face him.

"Just wanting to tell you that I'm driving us to school today." Harley had a shit eating grin on his face, obviously enjoying Peter's reaction.

Peter looked utterly defeated. "I wanna die, but not with you driving."

Harley smiled, he liked to annoy Peter.

"C'mom sweetie, let's roll." Harley dangled his keys in front of Peter's face, taking every moment to show off his car that he could. (aka: how most juniors at my school act)

"I'll be there in a second, honey."

Peter got in the passenger seat, a sigh escaping his lips.

"I don't wanna go to school."

Harley looked over at him, before focusing on the road once again. "Is that Flash prick giving you a hard time again? I won't let it slide this time, I'll beat his no good little-"

"No, Flash hasn't done anything. I just have an essay due, I had to print it and everything."

Harley pulled into the school and they got out, Peter rummaged in his backpack to show Harley the essay.

"Oh shit! Harley!"

"What happened?" Harley jumped at Peter's sudden raise in voice.

"I left it at home!" Peter's face was red and he looked like he was about to cry.

"You go ahead and go to class, I'll run back and get it." Harley zipped Peter's backpack for him. "Don't worry darlin' I'll be back in no time."

Harley got in the car and quickly drove away.

Peter was left standing in the parking lot, clear of students due to the bell ringing a few minutes ago.

Peter sighed, he didn't want to be late, but he knew if he was late and didn't have his essay then that would be even worse for him.

Peter went inside the building, texted Harley to just forget about the essay and hurry back so he wouldn't be too late, and sat at his desk.

The teacher didn't start until a few minutes later, Peter's text message was still unread.

"Alright, first order of business to get to today is your essays. You've had a week to get them done so everyone should have there's out and ready for when I call your name."

Peter internally groaned, he could already hear her reprimanding him in front of the entire class for being so careless.

Peter zoned out as she called out students names in alphabetical order to turn in their essays.

"Ned Leeds, come on up and turn in your essay."

Ned got up and showed her that he did all the required pages and topics before turning it in.

"Cindy Moon."

A knock was heard on the door, causing the teacher to stop checking Cindy's essay.

She stood away from he podium and opened to door.

"Harley Keener, and what pleasure do I have seeing you here?" She asked.

Harley was a pretty well known trouble maker in the school, his pranks were legendary and everyone was curious as why he showed up at a sophomore (10th grade) classroom.

Harley was a junior (11th grade), and this class is only for sophomores.

"Well ma'am, I'm here to give someone this," he waved the essay around in his hand. "Oh? And who's is that?" She asked.

Harley only hung around the jocks, from what everyone knew, so what he said next was what surprised everyone.

"Peter Parker."

People were shook. Harley Keener, the schools known trouble maker and popular guy, was being late to his classes to bring Peter Parker an essay.

"Come on in, he's right over there." Peter felt like smashing his head on the table. Could she have not taken the essay from Harley and that would be that?

Obviously not, because Parker Luck™ never knew when to quit.

Harley have her a smile as he passed through the doorway.

"Here you go darlin' " Harley handed Peter his essay, who looked like he was about to jump out of the window.

Harley just had to tease him some more, he couldn't let go of this opportunity.

"It would have helped if you told me where it was, I looked everywhere before I found it on your desk."

Peter glared at him, knowing full and well what Harley was doing.

"You drove off before I could tell you anything, and when I texted you to forget it you didn't even look."

Harley pulled out his phone, ignoring the teacher saying she had a class to teach.

"Friday, did Peter text me earlier?" Peter felt like he was going to die, could Harley not let Friday read his contact name out loud? Also, why was the teacher not trying to get him out of the room so she could teach?

"You got a text message from Cutie Pie at 7:43 am. Would you like me to read the message to you?"

"Nah, that's all." Harley moved a curl out of Peter's face. "I'll see you later."

Harley winked at the teacher as he turned to leave.

"I'm afraid I'll have to give you a detention for interrupting my class." The teacher said, blocking Harley's path to leave.

Harley nodded. "Of course ma'am." Harley was known for his manners, but his attitude sure as hell got the best of him sometimes.

Harley turned towards Peter as the teacher wrote Harley a detention slip. "Are you fine with waiting up for me for a bit?"

"Yeah, sure." Peter sighed, he literally hated his life.

The rest of the day went by fine, besides the people from his class being obsessed with what happened that morning.

Harley was pretty popular, and his reputation would be hurt if he was seen hanging out with a nerd like Peter.

Harley always said he didn't care and Peter could talk to him during school hours whenever, but Peter decided it would be best if the school didn't know they lived together.

Peter went to the detention room at the end of the day to sit out there and wait for Harley to get out.

He could always call Happy and ask him to pick him up, but Peter liked the time he got to spend with Harley.

Harley walked out the classroom as soon as Peter had arrived, the school still swarming with students.

"I thought you had detention?"

Harley smiled. "You're right, I had detention."

Peter shook his head, "What did you do this time?"

"I just told the old lady in there I was just giving my sweetheart an essay that was due today and she let me go." Harley shrugged.

"You're a dumbass." Peter said.

Harley draped his arms over Peter's shoulders. "But I'm your dumbass."

"Get off, people will see you and think we're dating!" Peter pushed Harley off of him, Harley pretended to sulk.

"Yo Harley!" Peter recognized John's voice, one of the guys in Harley's friend group.

"See, I just save your ass from a whole lot of embarrassment." Peter pointed out, crossing his arms.

"You don't embarrass me." Harley said.

John jogged over, throwing an arm around Harley's shoulders.

"What are you doing talking to this nerd?" John asked, pushing Harley a bit.

Harley pushed him back, "I was just talking to him, not a big deal."

"Yeah but he's still a loser, you don't want people knowing you talk to losers."

Harley rolled his eyes, John's words not even going in his ears.

"Anyways, we're about to go bowling wanna come?" John asked.

Harley glanced at Peter who gave him a secret thumbs up.

"Nah I've to go home, I can't be late again or I'll get my ass beat." Harley wasn't exactly lying. The last time he went out he stayed out way past his curfew and Mr. Stark threatened to call his mom and fly her all the way out here so she could be his ass.

"Alright man, we'll hang out next time?"

Harley nodded. "Definitely." They did a bro-hug thing and John jogged back to his friends.

"Why didn't you go?" Peter asked as the headed to Harley's car.

"All they do when we go out is get drunk. It gets boring after awhile."

They got in Harley's car and back home they went.

Carol loves and supports you no matter what:

(￣ω￣;)

Peter yawned as they walked in. The team had gone out for a three day mission so they were home alone, but got frequent check-ins from Harley's mom and Peter's aunt.

"Oh I invited my friends over later. They texted and asked if they could come over since I couldn't go out." Harley said.

"It's fine, just don't let them bring any alcohol. And make sure they don't spread where you live." Peter advised.

"They've been here before, they won't tell." Harley shrugged.

"Wait, when?"

"Oh you were at May's for the day and I was bored so I asked them to come over." Harley explained.

"Okay well I'm gonna go take a nap, when will they be here so I know when not to leave my room?"

"Four, and you know you can come out of your room right? This is where you live."

"Yeah but they don't know that I love here with you. What if they tell others and you get dragged down to loserville with me?"

Harley sighed. "How many time do I have to tell you I don't care if people know we live together?" Harley held Peter's hand.

"Plus, it's not like they'll make fun of you with me around." He twirled Peter, making the younger giggle.

"Well I'm going to go take a nap." Peter waved a hand and went down the hall.

"Sweet dreams!" Harley called behind him.

Harley heard Peter's door shut and it was silent, he had about fifteen minutes until his friends got here.

Harley spent the fifteen minutes making sure no private information was out, like Peter being Spider-Man stuff.

"Harley, four males are in the lobby saying they are your friends, should I allow them up?"

His friends were a few minutes early. "Yeah, let em up."

"Hey Harley!" His friends yelled in sync as they all piled out of the elevator.

"Y'all want something to eat?" Harley asked.

"Yeah sure." Kyle said. (he punches drywall in his free time)

"I could eat." Trey shrugs. (he has a basketball game tomorrow)

"Okay." Jared agreed. (he doesn't know how to read)

John nodded. (he doesn't have anything special about him)

"Okay is pizza good?"

The three friends nodded. "Alright, Friday order a large combination and a large of the usual."

"Okay, the cost will be $20.43"

"I'll pay for the usual, y'all pay for yours." Harley said.

"What's the usual for? You didn't get that last time." Jared said.

Harley ignored them, taking the money and going down to pay for the pizza that was magically waiting for them in the lobby.

~what really happened~

"ALL RIGHT EVERYBODY WE GOT AN ORDER FROM STARK DROP EVERYTHING!"

"WHAT DO I PUT ON THIS?"

"IT ISN'T COOKING FAST ENOUGH WHERE'S THE FLAMETHROWER!"

"WHERE THE HELL ARE THE PEPPERONI'S?!"

"HAROLD CUT THE SHIT AND DRIVE!"

~back to Harley~

He came up with the pizzas in hand, his friends playing rock paper scissors.

"Okay here's the pizza, you whores." He set the combination pizza on the coffee table, the other being placed on the counter.

The four ate, before deciding to play Candy Land.

"HA! Fuck you, I got the ice cream! Come at me, bitches!" Kyle yelled.

"Aw come on! I got the fucking gingerbread man!" Jared yelled, throwing his green player on the gingerbread man square. "What kind of shit is this!"

It was currently five, his friends had been there for an hour.

Harley seemed to be the only one to notice Peter going into the kitchen and heating up some pizza.

"Did y'all here that?" Trey asked when Peter closed the microwave door.

Everyone turned to see Peter walking out of the kitchen with tow pieces of Pizza on a paper plate.

"Oh shit, it's the nerd." John said.

Peter's eyes we're wide. "Uh, yeah."

"Good evening sleeping beauty." Harley said, completely ignoring the awkwardness in the room.

Peter glared at Harley, though it looked like a sleepy puppy.

"Wanna watch a movie with us?" Harley asked, nodding his head in the direction of his friends picking one out.

Peter shook his head. "No, I think I'll go call Ned and-"

"Nope, it's movie time." Harley dragged Peter to the couch.

"Harley I have homework!" Peter tried to push Harley away from him.

"Oh yeah, Tony's heard that one before." Harley refused to let go, only tightening his grip around Peter's waist.

Peter could easily get Harley off of him, but Harley knew Peter would never use his super strength on him.

Peter eventually gave up, sighing in defeat. Harley smiled, "I won that time! Friday add a point to mine."

"Peter: 43, Harley: 32. Peter is still in the lead."

"Haha, can't beat that. Loser." Peter teased.

Harley's friends on the other hand were shook to their cores. Normally Harley would have body slammed one of them if they called him a loser.

"And who exactly called themselves a loser earlier?" Harley asked, arms still around Peter.

"We don't talk about that anymore."

Harley scoffed, "Loser." Peter kicked Harley on his leg.

"Don't fuck with me, potato boy." He said.

Harley's friends nearly had a heart attack right then and there. That nerd was about to get the shit beat out of him.

"Hey! You're gonna pay for that Spider Baby!" Harley picked Peter up off the couch, only to throw him back down in it. Then he laid on top of Peter.

"Okay guys, time to start the movie." Harley said.

His friends stood there, mouths open.

"Close your mouths before I spray paint in them!" Harley said.

His friends closed their mouths and threw popcorn at him.

"I would fight you all, but I'm busy right now." His friends laughed, sitting down to watch the movie.

"Get off of me!" Peter said.

"No. Friday start the movie."

The Bee Movie started, and everything was went quiet.

A few minutes into the movie Harley felt Peter wrap his arms around his waist.

A weird feeling in his stomach startled him.

Was he getting sick?

The movie ended and it was time for everyone to go home.

Trey turned around to say bye to Harley only to see him and the nerd asleep.

"Holy shit guys, look at this blackmail." Trey laughed and got up, taking his phone out.

"Dude, this is gold." Jared said.

The nerds arms were still around Harley, who's arms were overtop of Peter's, keeping them in place. All while Harley was using Peter as a mattress.

Trey took the picture and sent it to Jared and Kyle. "Let's keep it quiet for awhile, we'll show it to Harley tomorrow."

"I would advise you to delete the photo." They heard from above.

"Yeah, okay AI lady." Jared said.

"I have more power than you know." Was the reply.

"Yeah fuck this, I'm not about to get killed by an AI," Kyle said and sprinted to the elevator, followed by the other three.

"Aw shit. Harley get off of me." Peter woke up sore, due to Harley laying on him all night.

Harley groaned in response, not moving a bit.

"Friday what time is it?" He asked.

"It is currently 7:15am."

Harley shot up, "Shit we're going to be late!"

Peter groaned in pain, holding his stomach that Harley just killed while getting up. "I'm in pain!"

Harley kissed Peter's head. "Sorry darlin' "

Peter's face felt hot, maybe he was getting a fever.

"Get dressed you dumbass or I'm leaving you here."

Peter ran to his room and quickly got dressed and brushed his teeth. He grabbed his backpack and followed Harley out into the car.

Peter ran in just as the bell rang, out of breath from running so much that morning.

"Care to explain Mr. Parker?" His teacher asked.

"Slept in." He said, taking his seat.

Harley walked into class, five minutes after the bell rang.

"Care to explain Mr. Keener?" His teacher asked.

"Me and my darlin' slept in this morning, what about you? How's Mrs. Laher?" Harley took his seat.

"Don't asked inappropriate questions, Mr. Keener. Did you do your homework?"

Harley winked. "Of course not Mr. L."

Mr. Laher shook his head in disappointment, while the rest of the call muttered.

One girl tapped his shoulder halfway through the PowerPoint presentation. "Are you dating someone? Asking for a friend."

Harley smirked, he was going to have fun with this. "Oh yeah."

"Really? Who?" She asked.

"They go to this school, a sophomore." He replied.

"What does she look like? What's her name?"

Harley was having so much fun with this already. "Brown curly hair, brown eyes, short, puppy face. Name starts with a P."

The girl pouted. "Why can't you tell me her name, I would love to be friends with her."

Harley almost snorted. "Sorry ma'am, that information is for my darlin' only."

The girl gave him a dumbfounded look. "It's a name."

Harley winked. "Exactly."

The lunch bell rang and everyone flocked into their friend groups.

Harley's had a special surprise waiting for him.

"Hey man, you fell asleep on us last night!" John said, nudging him in his side.

Harley rolled his eyes, lightly punching him. "Yeah so?"

John brought out his phone, showing Harley the picture.

Harley froze and his facial expression became unreadable.

The four laughed. "Looks at him!" They said.

"You better delete that if you know what's good for you." Harley said, his voice losing his usual playful tone.

"Why? Don't want the school to know about your little nerdy boyfriend?" John said, Jared, Kyle, and Trey snickering in the background.

"No, I don't care what other people think. But Peter does. If you spread the photo and make him get bullied, I will beat the ever living shit out of you with no regrets."

The four laughed, thinking Harley was joking. The laughter slowly died as they realized he wasn't joking around, he was serious.

"Wow, you really care about that nerd?" John asked impressed.

"Yeah, so delete it."

"Alright man, we'll delete it." Jared said, taking his phone out and deleting the picture. The rest following suit.

"What, Kyle, send that to me first." Harley said.

"Sure, but why?" Kyle asked, sending the picture before deleting it from his gallery.

"Just because y'all can't tease Peter for it doesn't mean I can't." Harley smirked.

It was silent for a moment before Trey spoke. "So is he your boyfriend?"

Harley smiled and shook his head.

"Not yet."

Peter waited for Harley outside the school, texting Tony while he was waiting.

Mr. Irondad- How's everything going? Has Harley been abusing you any lately?

Petey- eh, just the usual

Mr. Irondad- Gotcha, I'll be home in a few days. Love you Pete.

Petey- aw love you too ;,)

"Yo, nerd!" Peter looked up to see one of Harley's friends, Trey, coming over to him.

"Let's go around back." He said, grabbing Peter by the shoulders and steering him away from the car.

"Um, why? I could count this as kidnapped and take you to jail." Peter said.

Trey laughed, "You're pretty funny. Peter, right?"

"Yeah. Also can you let go of my shoulders? I feel like your about to throw me across the parking lot."

"Oh yeah, sorry man." Trey let go and they were behind the school.

"So why am I here again? You're not going to hold me for ransom or something right? Because if your hide out is behind a school then you're pretty dumb."

Trey laughed again, hitting Peter in his back.

"Damn, you're hilarious!"

Peter shrugged. "Yeah, I get that."

"Shut up you cocky bastard."

Peter turn and saw Harley, quickly walking behind him, shielding himself from the other three friends that came out behind Trey.

"Hey sweetie, I would appreciate not getting kidnapped today." Peter said.

Harley pulled Peter in front of him. "Aw darlin' thanks for trusting me."

"Wait no, I never said that." Peter tried to run away, only for Harley to wrap his arms around him.

"You're cheating!" Peter said.

Peter got increasingly confused as Harley's friends left, high-fiving each other on the way to the front of the school.

"Uh Harley, what's going on?" Peter asked, suddenly feeling nervous.

"I like you." Harley said, pressing his head in between Peter's neck and shoulder.

Peter froze, his face heated up, his stomach felt funny, and his heart was running a fucking mile in his chest.

He had no idea why he felt like this. It scared him, he was confused.

"I-i like you too." Peter said. That had to be the only reason he felt that way, he couldn't think of another reason as to why he would.

"So do you wanna be my official darlin'?" Harley asked.

"Yes, but only if we can get ice cream on the way home."

Harley smiled.

"Of course."

🥒 "oH mEh GoD, iTs A sAlTy CuCuMbEr"