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Vaanga vaanga story kulla polaa 🚴🏻‍♀️💜🦋

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I would have killed him if Charan and the other boys hadn't pulled me back. The police arrested him as I gave him one last slap for keeping his filthy eyes on my student. How the fucking dare he? I glared at him until he was out of sight and wriggled free from the boys' hold. Then, after asking Charan for Seetha and Kamali's room number, I headed straight there.

As soon as I entered their room, Seetha burst out at me, thinking I had beaten up that guy just because she touched me. Has she lost her mind or what? But, I held myself together, and when I finally yelled her name, I saw her face shift, like she'd come to a realization.

So, I told her to put on my shirt and stepped out to get her some water. And, when I returned, she kept asking me over and over what the man had said. I told her exactly what he said—just to stop her from imagining something worse.

Then, I let her cry against my bare chest for a while, neither of us fully aware of anything beyond the moment. I was just trying to help her let out her emotions, and she was seeking warmth and comfort. After a few minutes, as her rapid breaths and hiccups calmed, she suddenly jolted and pulled away. I could see her face flush as she realized I was half-naked in front of her. She awkwardly embraced that fact to steady herself. I, too, released my hold on her head and cleared my throat, saying,

"I.. I'll call Kamali in"

I left the room, but not before glancing back at her. She was sitting on the bed, hugging herself, and blushing as she sniffed the collar of my shirt. 

A small smile curved my lips as I walked out, still feeling the warmth of her presence on me.

Then, I told Kamali to take care of her, and stepped away to call our college principal. I explained the situation, without mentioning her name, and reassured him that everything was under control and there was no need to worry.

When I returned to the swimming pool area, a few students asked about Seetha. I assured them too saying  that she was fine and told everyone to enjoy the trip. They soon got back to their fun, except for Kamali, Madhu, Jiji, Charan, Yuvan and Aakash, who stayed with Seetha.

I called Charan through my phone and told them all to bring Seetha back to the pool area. Soon enough, they arrived, and I saw her dressed in a black tee and black track pants. I felt a deep sense of concern for her, but I had a belief that she would return to her usual self soon. She walked over with Charan and handed me my shirt, with a slight smile, of course, that didn't reach her eyes. I smiled back, took the shirt, and looked at her.

"Poi enjoy pannu, Seetha"

(Go and enjoy, Seetha)

I said softly to which she nodded slowly, avoiding eye contact. She then walked away with Charan and entered the pool, grabbing his arm. But, as soon as she stepped in, everyone gathered around her, splashing water and making her laugh for the first time since the incident.

I exhaled with relief as I saw her laughing heartily and took videos and selfies with the boys in the pool. And we all enjoyed ourselves in the pool for the entire evening. But, as the crowd of other college students began to fill the pool area, we headed back to our rooms late in the evening.

For the long-awaited campfire night, I groomed my beard, styled my hair, and, changed into a light, semi-transparent white shirt with a subtle pattern, paired with light blue jeans. Then, added a black wristwatch to complete the look.

A few minutes later, I joined the group of stylish and handsome boys, each showcasing their own fashion game. We were setting up the campfire, connecting the mics, and preparing the karaoke system. As we worked, I felt a strange excitement, eager not only to hear her sing but also to see how she looked tonight.

Although I knew she might be dressed in something that would cover her entirely, like the simple 'adakka odukkamaana girl' sh...

(Modest girl)

I stopped my thoughts when I heard a whining and giggling sound and turned to see her. And at the next moment, I couldn't tear my eyes away from her. Because, she looked so fucking good ? or, 

Absolutely stunning ?

Uhmmm..

Or, maybe even hot, in her fringed black crop top paired with a high-waisted, asymmetrical black skirt with a front slit revealing her legs up to her knee. Her soft, wavy hair cascaded over her shoulders, and her bare biceps and collabornes were visible due to the sleeveless top. And those smoky makeup made her breathtakingly gorgeous. 

I could admit that without any hesitation.

When her eyes met mine for a moment before she quickly looked away, blushing, I shifted my gaze and thoughts from her to the campfire setups, exhaling a long-held breath.

Then, as she stood beside me with Kamali and Jiji, I glanced at Charan, who was making some kind of gesture towards them. I raised my eyebrows in question, and he smiled sheepishly before slipping away. I sighed and heard someone clearing their throat behind me.

"Aayush sir"

I turned around when Kamali called me and saw her with a teasing smile. I glanced at Seetha, who was giving a nervous smile to Kamali. Frowning, I turned back to Kamali as she asked,

"Neenga dha inniku Remo polaye?"

(Are you going to be a Remo today?)

I furrowed my brows in confusion while adjusting the karaoke setup.

"Illa ipdi remo maadhiri ivlo handsome'aah vandhirukingle adhaa ketten"

(No, I was just asking because you've come looking so handsome like Remo.)

Kamali asked me teasingly, while Jiji giggled. I shifted my gaze to Seetha, who gulped at my look.

"Setha amaidhiyaa iru Kamali. Pongo. Poi ellaarukkum help pannungo"

(Please stay quite, Kamali. Go. Go and help everyone)

She pushed Kamali aside. They both laughed.

"Nee nadathu maami. Varom professor "

(Carry on, maami. We will take our leave, professor)

Jiji said, mimicking Seetha's voice, and giggled before leaving with the others, leaving Seetha alone with me. I gave her a look, silently asking her to explain the things that had happened before me just now.

"Sorry. Avaa yedho tease panneetu poraa. I'm sorry"

(Sorry. They teased about something. I'm sorry.)

She clasped her hands into fists and apologized to me. I shook my head and turned toward Charan

"Charan speaker oda sound check Pannu"

(Charan, check the sound on the speaker.)

After checking the sound system, I glanced at her still standing beside me. I smiled, dusted off my palms, and asked,

"Ready to give your performance?"

She pressed her lips together and, with a hint of hesitation, nodded her head, saying,

"Yeah. But, I'm bit nervous. Nothing should go wrong"

Her voice came as a whisper. 

"They won't. All the best"

I checked the mic one last time and handed it to her. As our fingers brushed against each other and our eyes locked, she took the mic from my hand, slowly.

But, when the bright lights were dimmed, I gave her a final smile and moved to stand in the corner then took a quick glance around at our arrangements; the woods were arranged for the campfire, which was lit, and the serial bulb setups illuminated the open space around us.

Vimal and Seetha : 

Bay of bengal
Beachil en kaal
Pattaal enna ketta vidum
Bay watch pengal
Bluish kangal
Thottaal enna sutta vidum

[Would the water get spoiled if I step on the beach of bay of bengal?
Would I get a shock if I touch the Bay watch girls or stare at their bluish eyes?]

Neechal podum poochedi
Nilavai thedum
Neela vaanam naanthaanae
Koocham neengi poochadi
Neelaavil naanum
Veenai pola meetum neram

[I am the one, who is searched for, by the flowers that swim..
I have lost my shame, I am like a veena in your arms and when you play..]

Candlelil poothiri
Yethidum raathiri
Maenithaan aanathae
Ennavo maathiri
Manmathan vanthu nee
Manthiri dhinasari

[As you set the flame in my eyes, in the night, my body became something else,
Manmatha[Cupid], please come and chant, every day]

Everyone : 

Nahna na nah nahna nahna na na na
Nahna na nah nahna nahna na na na
Na na na na nah na na na na nahna na
Nahna na nah nahna nahna na na na

The students and Rekha ma'am danced around the campfire while the singers set the mood for the evening.

But the shock was, the next one, 

Seetha : 

Kutthalathu oodha kathu
Koothaduthu neram parthu
Ippo sudhi yerudhu thannalae..aa.aaa..aa..

[The breeze is blowing from the hot air,
Time is moving slowly,
Now, the time has come to change on its own...aa.aaa..aa..]

I gasped visibly, realizing that this again a 'adakka odukkamaana ' (modest) student of mine was singing this song, perfectly matching the voice and tone of the original. I gulped and watched her, who was completely absorbed in her performance.

Vimal : 

Ammadi un aattam parthu

Naan aaduven kooda sernthu
Ippo vazhi maarudhu unnalae..aaa..aaa...aa..

[Seeing your dance,
I will dance along with you,
Now, the path won't change because of you...aa.aaa..aa..]

Vimal : 

Yedho thonudhu yedhuvo nogudu
Unna parthadhalaa
Ullae iruppadhu veliyae sirikkudhu
Unna serndhathalaa

[Something feels, something might be wrong,
Just by seeing you,
What's inside me is laughing outside,
When I'm with you.]

Seetha : 

Vidhathu indha mogam vegam
Thodaama thottu serum
Thadaal thadaal-nnu adikkira manasu Gapalu-nnu mela paayum

[Destiny and this passion's intensity
Slowly blends together
The heart that keeps beating 'thud-thud'
Overflows with excitement.]

Seetha : 

Varadhadhu vandhachuda
Kondadalaam
Ini namma neram-dhaanae

[The time has come,
Let's enjoy it,
Now is our time.]

Everyone : 

Hoo oo oo oo oo hoo oo oo hoo oo oo

They danced around the campfire with the signature hook step, rubbing their thighs and backs, while Yuvan and Charan danced together intimately like a couple, making everyone laugh. I shook my head at their attrocities.

Seetha : 

Mamanae unna thaangama
Mathiyil sorum pongama
Paavi naan paruthi maaraa ponenae

[O lover, without cooking rice and carrying you on me
this sinner has become like a cotton thread]

Boys: Ponenaeee...

I chuckled.

Seetha : 

Kaagam thaan kathi ponaalum
Kadhavu thaan satham pottaalum
On mugam paaka odi vandhenae

[Whenever the crow crows or if I hear door sound
I came running to see your face]

Everyone:Vandhenae....

Seetha : 

Othaiyil oda karaiyoram
Kathiyae on per sonnenae
Othaiyil odum rayil oramKathiyae on per sonnenaeAndha rayil dhooram ponadhumNeram aanadhum kanneer vittenae

[Alone in a stream shore, I shouted out loud your name
Alone in a train corner, I shouted out loud your name
Once the train went far from me, after some time
I cried]

Her voice was completely mesmerizing, drawing us in and making us sink into the softness of her melodious tones.

Seetha : 

Muthu mama enna vittu pogadhae
En otha usuru pona meendum vaaradhae

[O lover, do not leave me
If my one life leaves, it won't come back]

Everyone along with Vimal : 

Aathangara maramae arasamara ilaiyae
Aalamara kilaiyae adhilurangum kiliyae

[O the river shore tree, the leaf of Pipal tree
the stem of banyan tree, the parrot that sleeps in that tree]

We all clapped our hands, boys whistled and the next karoake played,

Seetha : 

Per kekkuraan kettuttu paakkuraanae
Adha paakkuraan paathittu poraanae

[He asked my name & was staring at me. 
He stared at me & left]

Kamali pulled Seetha to the center to join them in the dance.

Kai theikkuraan theichittu thaakkuraanae

Kan thaakkuraan thaakkittu
Ah ..ha aa thottaanae

Englandhu pengalum
Indiavil aangalum
Ada aasaigal adangaadha aatkal

[He caressed & assaulted me with his eyes, 
and finally touched me
English women & Indian men 
have a great appetite for sensual desires]

They all fell silent, gazing at each other.

Vimal : 

O mera bulbul thaara
En mun aadum elloraa
Aawaaraa aadi pora
aasai nooraa ainooraa

[O, my sweetheart! 
You're an Ellora statue dancing with me. 
Dance and enjoy. 
Our desires are plenty]

They chorused and laughed together, while I stood in the corner with a smile, my arms crossed beneath my chest. After a few more items and folk songs performed by the singers, we all gathered around the campfire, enjoying the pasta served by the resort staff. Kamali even fed Seetha in between her songs.

"Alright, guys. Now, let's switch to some melodies, okay?"

Vimal asked us.

"Yayyy" 

Vimal leaned down to Seetha's height to hear what she was saying, while I watched them intently. Then after listening, Vimal nodded, straightened up, and began to sing.

Vimal : 

Kannathil mutha palli thirakkava
Vetkathai echil thottu thodaikkava
Nenjukkul unnai katti irakkavaa..
Netrukkum indru serthu sirikkavaa

[Shall I open the eyes of my heart to reveal the hidden stories?
Shall I touch and stir the tales of devotion?
Should I bind you in my heart and embrace you?
Today, shall our eyes meet and smile together?]

My eyelashes lifted, and my eyes fell on her as she averted her gaze from me, blushing.

Thean ena thithikindrai

Yeno nee thappikindrai
Azhagin nirai kudam neeya

[The sweetness of honey is overflowing,
Why are you making mistakes?
You are the vessel of beauty's essence.]

She tucked her curls behind her ear and took a morsel of pasta from Kamali, parting her little pink lips. I bit my lips and averted my gaze as my heart pounded against my chest.

Something felt off, but deep down, a part of me whispered that everything would turn out fine.

Vimal : 

Pennae endhan kadikaaram
Endhan petchai ketkavillai
Unnai kanda nodiyodu
Nindrathadi odavillai

[My dear, what is my time's fault?
My plea is not heard.
Since I saw you,
It haven't been able to rest.]

I looked at her, and she met my gaze before continuing to sing.

Seetha : 

Ithu varai yaaridamum
En manathu saayavillai
Enna oru maayam seidhaai
En idathil naanum illai

[Until now, no one has
Touched my heart.
What a magic you have created,
That even I am not here in my own place.]

She shook her head slightly, pointing out the lyrics while maintaining eye contact with me. I bit my lower lip, trying to hide my smile, but when she kept her gaze fixed on me without looking away, I shrugged off everything else and allowed myself to be lost in her eyes.

Vimal : 

Enna idhu enna idhu
En nizhalai kaanavillai
Undhan pinbu vanthathadi
Innum athu thirumbavillai

[What is this, what is this?
No one has seen my shadow.
Even after you left,
It still hasn't returned.]

Strange !

This is not me.

Vimal : 

Engae endru ketten
Un kaaladi kaattuthadi
Anbae..

[Where do I ask?
It shows your footsteps.
My love...]

We broke our eye contact when Kamali winced and pushed Charan away after he shouted into her ear during the high-pitched 'anbae' (my love) part of the song

Vimal : 

Intha nimidam nenjukkul inikkirathae
Adada..intha neruppu mayakamaai irukkirathae
Unnaal ..intha ulagam yaavumae
Pudhithaai therigirathae...

[this moment is sweet in my heart.
Oh, this fire is glowing mysteriously.
Because of you,
This world seems new and bright.]

Everyone laughed as Charan, who had been slapped by Kamali for his antics.

Seetha : 

Santhithomae kanaakalil
Sila muraiyaa pala muraiyaa
Andhi vaanil ulaavinom
Athu unakku ninaivillaiyaa
Iru karaigalai udaiththidave
Perugidumaa kadal alaiyae
Iru iru uyir thaththalikkaiyil
Vazhi sollumaa kalangaraiyae
Unathalaigal ennai adikka
Karai servathum kanaavil nigazhnthida

[We used to meet in dreams - some times or many times
We used to walk in twilight, dont u remember?
Is the waves trying to break the shores?
Would the light house guide the wavering minds?
Your waves hit me and took me to shores in the dreams....]

I wondered,

If she planned to kill me or something. 

With that, I stood up to place the plate in the sink, with her voice echoing through the speakers.

Seetha : 

Anal melae pani thuli
Alaipaayum oru kili
Maram thedum mazhai thuli
Ivaithaanae ival ini
Imai irandum thani thani
Urakkangal urai pani
Edharkaaga thadai inii...

[Dews on the heat
Wavering mind
Rain drops searching for flowers
All these became her traits
Eye brows are separate
Sleep went for freeze
Why do want hurdles now]

I returned after she finished the song, and everyone clapped for them. I joined them without meeting her gaze, though I knew she was looking at me.

Vimal : 

Unnodu pesikolla
Vaarthaigal serthuvaithum
Ullukkul thiki thavithenae

[Though I collect a lot of words to speak to you
On seeing you I don't know what to speak and my hearts working gets stuck]

Vimal looked at Seetha with a smile as he finished the stanza. She smiled back at him, then turned towards me, causing my emotions to shift from the intensity of the stare to a knowing smile.

Seetha : 

Un perai mattum dhinam
Nenjukkul solli solli
En perai indru marandhenae

[Everyday telling only your name
Now I have forgotten my own name]

Her eyes closed at the end, feeling the song.

She. Sings. Each & Every lyric. Understanding. It's. Meaning.

This realization sends a familiar breeze throughout my body, and I sit still, watching her dancing curls beside her cheeks, as they seem to feel the same breeze as me.

Vimal : 

Manjal nilavae
Konjal mozhiyae
Vetkathimirae saikkathae

[Oh girl who is like the yellow moon, as childish as kids speech
And shy yet bold don't charm me]

And when my eyes met hers as I averted them from her curls, she blushed at my gaze and lowered her eyes before continuing to sing.

Seetha : 

Aasai kanavae
Meesai puyalae
Nitham isayil nee kollathae

[Oh boy who is my favorite dream, as brave as cheetah
And beautiful as music please don't kill me with your love]

Vimal : 

En nenju chinna ilai
Neethan en kadhal mazhaiUnnalae naan nenaya vendum

[Small leaf in my heart
You are the rain of love for me
I must be drenched because of you]

Kamali nudged her, and she averted her gaze, giving Kamali a blushing glare.

Seetha : 

En nenju chinna kodi
Neethan en kadhal chedi
Un meedhu suttrikolla vendum

[Small flag of my heart
You are the plant of love for me
I must grow around you]

Vimal:

Paarvaigal pudhu vaarthai
Parimaaruthae
Idhayangal idam maaruthae

[Looks are speaking new words
Hearts are being exchanged]

The song revealed my current mindset. As I was reflecting, our gazes shifted, changing the meaning from before. It now seemed to reveal and speak about something new, beyond our understanding.

Seetha : 

Unnaalae en nimidangal
Azhagaanadhae
Vali kooda sugamaanadhae

[Because of you the moments of my life are being made beautiful
Even pain is becoming enjoyable]

And a few more songs were sung by both of them as we were carried away by their heavenly voices. They made the atmosphere even more breezy and perhaps romantic for the secret lovers. 

Uhmm, I won't deny that I'm slowly falling for something that isn't made of metal but is far more precious and enchanting than any treasure.

I don't know what suddenly changed my mind and heart. If someone asks me whether it was due to her returning to her normal self inside my embrace or her words about crying for me while thinking of my days without my mother, I wouldn't have a clear answer. 

What I do know is that I can't forget how my heart mixed with warmth just from catching a glimpse of her petite figure, hopping around like a kid, singing like a breeze, and being a savior to me.

The campfire ended with even more memorable moments, and all the students bowed to Seetha and Vimal dramatically. Rekha Ma'am took a picture of the scene, praised both of them, and hugged them, appreciating their effort. Singing continuously for almost two and a half hours definitely deserved recognition, and they did a fabulous job. I hugged Vimal and praised him, then shook hands with Seetha, breaking eye contact quickly to avoid getting lost again in the depth of her gaze.

Then we headed back to our rooms for the overnight stay at the resort, as we were scheduled to head back to Goa the next morning and enjoy our last day of the IV.

While standing near the window of my second-floor room, which I shared with Charan—who was currently missing—I noticed a shadow near the campfire setup. Frowning, I locked the door and headed downstairs towards the campfire area to see..

"Seetha?"

My voice came out in a confused, questioning tone as I wondered what she was doing here alone in the middle of the night. She turned towards me and smiled.

"Sir"

"Indha time'le Inga thaniyaa enna pandra?"

(At this time, what are you doing here alone?)

I asked her, giving a quick glance around to see if anyone was with her. When our eyes met, she also looked around, shrugged her shoulders, and said,

"Charan, Kamali rendu perum pool kitta peseetu irukkaango. Nekku bore adichadhu adhaa Inga vandhutten"

(Charan and Kamali are chatting nearby the pool. I got bored, so I came here.)

She replied, and I narrowed my brows.

"Oh. Appo avanga koodaye irukka vendiyadhu dhane? Thaniyaa inga yen vandha?"

(Oh. So, you were supposed to be with them, right? Why did you come here alone?)

I asked, wondering why this trio was roaming around alone at this hour without considering their safety.

"Avanga lovers aayiram pesipaango. Naan epdi anga irukka mudiyum? Adhaa inga vandhutten"

(They'll talk endlessly as they're lovers. How could I stay there? That's why I came here.)

"Oh"

She twisted her lips, and I bit the inside of my cheeks, inhaling deeply as I looked around. Then, glancing at her, I saw her smile before turning away, removing the neckband from around her neck, and sitting down on the logs placed nearby the campfire. She looked at me.

I averted my gaze, raked my fingers through my hair, glancing around once more, debating whether to stay or head back to my room. Finally, I decided to sit beside her on the logs, pulling up my track pants slightly to adjust them above my ankles.

"Neenga yen inga vandhinga?"

(Why did you come here?)

She asked suddenly, and I peeled my gaze away from the half-burning fire to her. Then, clearing my throat, I replied,

"Illa, yaaro inga ninnutu irundha maadhiri irundhuchu.. resort laye namma college students mattum dha overnight stay.. adhaa yaaru nu paathuttu polaa nu vandhen"

(It's nothing, just felt like someone was standing here... Only our college students are staying overnight at the resort, so I came to check who it was)

"Oh"

She nodded and turned away. I clasped my palms together, parted my legs, and rested my forearms on my thighs, staring at the campfire while shaking my legs slightly.

"Sorry"

She apologized unexpectedly, and I turned to look at her. She is sitting up straight, hands clasped on her lap, and giving me a slight smile while I furrowed my brows,

"Yedhukku?"

(For?)

"Illa. Naan.. anga enna nadandhadhu nu theriyaama ungamela kova pattu katheeten"

(It's just that... I got angry with you and scolded you without even knowing what really happened.)

She said softly, and I looked into her eyes for a moment before noticing her little fingers fidgeting. I shook my head and turned forward, saying,

"It's okay"

After a few moments of silence, she said,

"Thanks"

I chuckled softly, looked at her and asked,

"Idhu yedhukku?"

(For what is this now?)

She grinned and replied, balancing her right elbow on her right thigh,

"Enna samadhanam pannadhukku"

(For making me feel better)

That made me smile.

Isn't it nice to hear those words from someone for whom you spent all your time trying to make them feel better? 

"That's okay. Actually, isn't that my responsibility?"

I asked, looking into her eyes.

"Haan?"

Her brows jumped in shock. I gulped, realizing my own words, and quickly tried to shift the meaning by saying,

"Illa. Adhu. Un appa kitta unna trip'le batharamaa paathukuven nu solleerken le? That's what I meant"

(No. That... I had promised your father that I would take care of you during the trip, right? That's what I meant.)

She smiled at me before turning her gaze elsewhere, her elbow still resting on her thigh and her cheek on her fisted palm.

I glanced at her side face for a moment, then turned away, scratching my brow with my finger.

After another few minutes of silence,

I realized something, suddenly, and said,

"Actual'aah naanu apdi katheerka koodaadhu. I'm sorry"

(Actually, I, too, shouldn't have yelled at you that way. I'm sorry.)

She looked at me, her face turning in shock. I frowned, wondering what was wrong with my statement. I even felt confused on my own words, questioning myself if I had said something other than just apologizing for raising my voice at her.

"What?"

She gulped, gave me a smile, changing her shocked expression, and said,

"Illa, onnula. Paravala sir"

(No, nothing. It's okay sir)

I hummed and she asked,

"Naan onnu kekkatumaa?"

(Can I ask you something?)

"Kelu" 

(Yeah, sure)

I said, nodding slightly and shrugging my shoulders, turning to face her.

She hesitated for a moment before saying,

"Illa idha ennaala vera yaarkittayum kekka mudiyala. Infact, anga enna nadandhadhu'nu yaarum enkitta kekkavum illa. Naan..naanum sollala"

(I couldn't ask anyone else about this. In fact, no one even asked me what happened there. And I... I didn't tell anyone either.)

"Good. Adhuvum nalladhu dha"

(Good. That's for the best too)

I said, though she didn't know that I was the one who told everyone not to ask her anything about the incident.

"Mmm. Adhaa.."

(Mmm.. so..)

"Adhaa?"

(So?)

"Illa. Andha aalu enna aanaan?"

(That... what happened to that man?)

I stiffened at the thought of that guy. That bastard. I snapped at her, straightening myself,

"Adhu yedhukku ippo?"

(Why are you asking about that now?)

"Illa. Summa dha. Neenga yedhuvum panla'le?"

(No, I was just asking. You didn't do anything to him, right?)

She asked hurriedly, her eyes filled with hope. My lips twisted into a smile, thinking, as she might have thought I had done something to him.

"Illa ma. Police arrest panneetaanga"

(No, ma. The police arrested him.)

"Oh, okay"

She exhaled and turned away. I smiled, glancing at her bare toes before looking around and spotting her sandal-colored slipper, near one of the trees.

"Namma nalaiku early morning'eh Goa ku kelambanumaa?"

(Do we have to leave for Goa early tomorrow morning?)

She asked, and I nodded. Then I sat up straight, tapping my hands on my thighs before saying,

"Yeah, apppodha correct'ahh irukkum"

(Yeah, it will be the right time then)

She hummed, and I glanced at her toes before stretching my muscles, shifting left and right. Then, I clicked my tongue and sat down from the logs onto the concrete surface, placing my forearms behind me on the logs and crossing my legs with my left ankle resting on my right.

After inhaling deeply, I lifted my face to find her already looking at me, weirdly. I chuckled and said,

"Mudhugu valikudhu ma. Neeyum keela vaa"

(Back pain,ma. You should come down and sit too.)

I patted the space beside me. And she pulled her foot away when my fingers brushed against her toes softly, though it was unintentional.

"Paravala, sir. Naan ingaye irukken"

(That's okay, sir. I'll stay here)

She replied. And I shrugged my shoulders, saying,

"Okay"

Time slipped by in silence, marked only by the crackle of the fire, the distant chirping of insects, our steady breaths, and her beautiful soft hummings.

"Inniku super'ahh paaduna"

(You sang well today)

I said, looking at her.

"Thank you, sir"

She replied with a gentle smile.

"Songs'laa nalla choose panneerkaanga ellaarum. DJ irundhirundhaa kooda ellaarum ivlo happy'ah irundhiruppaangalaa nu therila"

(You all chose great songs. I don't even know if everyone would have been this happy if there was a DJ instead)

She simply smiled at me. I realized, with a frown, that I had been the one talking more than her.

"Am I making you uncomfortable?" 

I asked, genuinely confused by her behavior. And her eyes widened.

"Aiyo! apdilaa illa sir"

(Aiyo! Nothing like that sir)

"Apro yen pesave maatengura?"

(Why aren't you talking then?)

She gulped, averted her gaze and replied,

"Onnulaye"

(Nothing)

I grew more concerned hearing her brief replies and asked,

"Ennaachu, Seetha?"

(What's wrong, Seetha?)

She shook her head but replied,

"Mhum. Illa. Adhu.. Naan ungakitta onnu kekkavaa?"

(No. That.. can I ask you something?)

I looked at her, wondering what might be bothering her now.

"Naanum pesu, illanaa edhaadhu kelu nu dha soldren, Seetha"

(I'll also told you to either talk or ask about something, Seetha)

I reassured her again and observed her restless eyes and fidgeting toes. Suddenly, she met my gaze and asked,

"Unga amma've pathi pesalaamaa?"

(Can we talk about your mother?)

I sat stunned, staring at her for a moment before turning my gaze away to the fire. My heart raced, and I felt my palms growing wet.

"Si..sir?"

"En.. en amma pathi enna pesanum?"

(Wh..what should we talk about my mother?)

I asked without meeting her eyes.

"Summa dha. Enakku avangala pathi therinjukanum pola irukku. Vera yendha intention'uhm illa"

(Just like that. I wish to speak and know about her. I don't have any other intention)

I shook my head and looked at her, lifting my face.

"Intention'laa naan yedhuvum nenaikala, ma. Seri, yeppothula irundhu en amma've pathi therinjukanum nu thonuchu unakku?"

(I didn't mention anything about intention, ma. So, when did you start feeling the need to know about my mother?)

I asked her with a smile. She grinned finally and sat beside me on the floor, facing me with her legs crossed.

"Avangala naan yeppo unga whatsapp DP le paathano appothula irundhey ungakitta yeppo thaniyaa pesa mudiyudho appo naan avangala pathi kette aaganum nu nenachen"

(Whenever I saw her in your WhatsApp DP, I thought that if I ever get a chance to talk to you alone, I should ask you about her)

And her excitement made me chuckle.

"Yen?"

(Why?)

She shrugged her shoulders, blinking her eyes with a smile.

"Therila. Paakave avlo azhaga irukkaanga. Naan first avangala yeppo unga DP le paathano, appothula irundhe.. enakku avangala nerla paakanum nu aasaiyaa irundhadhu. Aana mudiyaadhu nu therinjapro, atleast avangala pathi therinjukavaadhu seiyalaame nu dha ketten"

(I don't know. I saw how beautiful she looked. When I first saw them in your DP, I really wanted to see them in person. But when I realized it wasn't possible, I thought at least I could know something about them.)

She explained hesitantly while I inhaled deeply, pulling my legs up and hugging them with my arms, my left palm held by my right wrist. And, I could feel her gaze still fixed on me.

"Solla viruppam illanaa venaa"

(If you don't want to share with me, then you don't have to)

She said softly. I shook my head then said,

"Viruppam illaama'laa illa. But.."

(It's not that I don't want to share. But..)

I fell silent for a few seconds, realizing it was the first time someone had asked me about my mother.

"Seri.. soldren"

(Alright.. I'll tell you)

She shifted closer to me, her eyes eager and her smile warm. I smiled back and began to talk about the person for whom I live in this world.

"Amma peru, Jaya. Romba azhaga iruppaanga. Romba'laa heigth illa. Mmm.. unna vida oru two inch adhigamaa iruppaanga nu nenaikiren"

(Her name is Jaya. She looks very beautiful. She's not very tall—maybe just a couple of inches taller than you, I think.)

I said, picturing my mother in my mind.

"Adhaa theriyume? avanga sirichaa kannathula dimple varum dhane?"

(I know. When she smiles, dimples appear in her cheeks, right?)

She asked with a knowing grin. I looked at her, surprised, and raised my eyebrows.

"En DP'le adhellaamaa theriyudhu?"

(Does all that show in my DP?)

She giggled.

"Yesss. Naan ellaame note panneerken"

(Yes, I noticed everything)

She raised her imaginary collar, and I chuckled, shaking my head as I continued to talk about my mother.

"Amma ku pattu podava katradhunaa romba pudikkum. Amma yerandhadhu, naan 2nd standard padikkumbodhu dha. Enakku chinna vayasula irundhe amma'naa romba pudikkum. Amma koodaye dha iruppen. Amma enna school ku kooptu povaanga, apro thirumba veetukku kooptu varuvaanga, apro vandhadhum naan ellaame solluven amma kitta, amma enakku puduchadhu mattum dha samaipaanga, pudikaadhadhu samachaalum, naan venaa nu sonnaa adutha second'eh enakku puduchadhu senju tharen nu solli senju tharuvaanga. Enakkaagave dha amma irundhaanga. Ippo naan yedhukkaaga irukkengradhey theriyaama irukken"

(Mom loves to wear silk sarees. She died when I was in the 2nd standard. From my childhood, I was really fond of her. She would always be with me, taking me to school and picking me up, and I'd share everything with her. If I liked something, she'd make sure I got it. If I didn't like something, she'd avoid it. She was always there for me. Now, I'm not sure why I'm here)

I smiled bitterly, and as I finished speaking, she blinked at me, holding my gaze.

"I would say something. But, neenga edhaadhu solluvinga"

(I would say something, but I'm afraid you might say something in response.)

She said, averting her gaze to her fidgeting hands in her lap. I smiled slightly and replied,

"I understand what you're trying to say, Seetha. But, I'm not completely ready for anything in my life, especially not this"

I pointed at her. She stared at me and gulped. I sighed, looked away, and said,

"But you're making me ready to give someone a chance in my life"

I said softly, with a sense of disbelief in myself, not in anyone else. As I knew how it would be for someone to enter my life. 

A life that had been completely self-isolated, reserved, and rigid.

"Amma ponadhula irundhu. I hate everyone, everything, each and every single things in my life, Seetha. Ellaarukkum naan burden'aah irukken nu thonuchu. Ennaala yaarum kashta pada koodaadhu nu thonuchu. Adhunaala dha naan enna kathunaalum.. oru naal nee yen ipdi enna mattum kathura nu enta kekkumbodhu avlo odanju ponen. Naan unna romba kashta paduthurano nu thon.. "

(Since my mother passed away, I've hated everyone, everything, and every single aspect of my life, Seetha. I felt like a burden to everyone and believed that no one should have to suffer because of me. That's why, when you asked why I was always yelling at you, I felt even weaker. I worry that I'm causing you a lot of..)

I stopped and looked at her.

"Naan pesalaa'le?"

(Can I speak, right?)

I asked with a hint of doubt, wondering if I was speaking too much and if she might be bored or something. But she gulped and nodded. I gave her a smile and continued,

"Mm.. romba kashta paduthurano nu thonuchu. Adhaa, adhukkaaga dha Charan enkitta vandhu yaaraadhu un appa, amma kitta pesi unna indha IV ku kooptu ponum nu sonnappo naane vandhu pesunen. Illanaalum vandhiruppen. And enakku romba'laa pesa theriyaadhu, Seetha. Pesunaalum, I end up shouting. Yen'naa adhu onnu dha naan orutharkitta pesumbodhu adhula irundhu enakku oru break tharum. Adhunaalaye naraya pera thitteerken. Avanga mela thappilla nu therinjaalum kathuven. To remind myself that I'm alone and don't have anyone for me, and to stop talking too much"

(Mm... I feel like I'm causing a lot of pain. That's why, when Charan came to me and said that someone should talk to your parents and ask them to send you for this IV, I spoke up. And I'm not very good at expressing myself, Seetha. Even when I talk, I end up shouting. It's just that talking to someone gives me a break from the talk. That's why I end up pushing people away. Even though I know it's not right, I do it to remind myself that I'm alone and don't have anyone for me, and to stop talking too much.)

"Pes..pesunaa enna?"

(Wh..what happens if you speak up?)

She asked me, stammering a bit. I furrowed my brows, recalling her question, and replied,

"Pesunaa.. pesunaa romba attach aageervano nu bayam. Enakku yaarkoodayum attach aaguradhukke bayam, Seetha. Romba attach aagi enna avanga vittutu poitaa.. I.. I can't.. innoru heartbreak ku enn.."

(If I talk... if I talk, I'm afraid I might become too attached. I'm scared of getting attached to anyone, Seetha. If I get too attached, and they leave me... I... I can't handle another heartbreak.)

"Professor"

I turned towards her.

"Ka..kai puduchukattumaa?"

(Sh.. shall I hold your hand?)

She asked, pointing to my hand, which was restlessly fidgeting with the leather of my watch. I looked at her eyes and her hand, and unable to resist myself, I took her whole right palm into my larger hands. 

She glanced at me, slightly shocked. I smiled and gently gripped her palm between mine.

"Thanks, Seetha"

I thanked her, knowing that she offered her hand not because she wanted to hold mine, but to offer me comfort.

"Naan.."

(I..)

She began to speak, but I gently squeezed her hand, offering an apologetic look as I asked,

"Naan pesi muduchurane? Inniku enakku pesanum nu thonudhu"

(Shall I finish? I feel like talking, today)

She blinked a few times and gave me a subtle nod.

I then shared everything about my childhood with my mother—how we celebrated birthdays, how we fed each other, how I used to sleep on her chest, and how she would rest her head on my lap. I reminisced about those moments while playing with her tiny fingers with my large ones.

"Unakku romba kutty fingers illa?"

(You have very tiny fingers, right?)

She smiled and gave a nod.

"Enakku romba perusu. Actual'aah naan indha maadhiri kutty fingers ippodha en life laye first time paakuren. Amma, Elango avangalukku'laa kooda ipdi irukkaadhu. Unakku romba kutty kutty fingers. See.."

(I have very large fingers. Actually, this is the first time I’m seeing such tiny fingers in my life. Even Amma and Elango don’t have fingers like this. You have very tiny fingers. See...)

I placed her right palm flat on my left and pointed out the difference in the height of our fingers, and chuckled.

"Paaru. Evlo kutty'aah irukku nu"

(Look, how small it is)

I gently stretched her thumb and shaped it between my fingers. She simply watched me, and I exhaled before turning to face her.

"Pesu, Seetha"

(Speak)

She shook her head, slowly.

"Pesa maatiyaa?"

(You won't speak?)

"Neenga ellaam solleetinglaa?"

(Have you finished saying everything?)

I frowned and nodded my head.

"Mmm avlodha. Idhukku mela enna soldradhu?"

(Yeah. What more is there to say?)

When I asked, she responded by asking me back as,

"Appo naan onnu kekkavaa?"

(Then, can I ask you something?)

"Mmm. Kelu"

(Ask)

"Enga amma naan inga, avangala vittutu dhooramaa irukkumbodhu naan aludhuttu irukkardhu therinja, avanga'naala adha yethukka mudiyumaa? Illanaa sandhoshamaa dha iruppaangalaa?"

(Will my mom be able to handle it if she finds out that I'm crying here, far away from her? Or would she be happy instead?)

I frowned at her question asked,

"Adhepdi iruppaanga?"

(How would she like that?)

"Adhaan naanu kekuren. Neenga ipdi alumoonjiyaa irundhaa unga amma epdi professor sandhoshamaa iruppaanga?"

(That's exactly what I'm asking. If you're here crying like this, how can your mom be happy, professor?)

I stared at her.

"Amma kitta pesuvinglaa?"

(Do you talk to your mom?)

"Mm"

I hummed and turned away as she placed her other hand over mine. Only then did I notice our hands had unknowingly intertwined. While I was lost staring at them, she asked,

"Enna pesuvinga? anniku naan varumbodhu aludhu aludhu pesuningle andha maadhiri dhane?"

(What do you say? That day, when I came, you spoke through your tears, didn’t you, just like that?)

I gulped, without answering anything.

"Petha paiyan ipdi irundhaa yendha amma'ku dha pudikkum sollunga?"

(Tell me, which mother would like it if her son is like this?)

I tightened my grip on our intertwined fingers, feeling overwhelmed by a rush of emotions, and whispered without meeting her gaze as,

"Aan..aana amma ku epdi naan pesuradhu kekkum? Naan mattum dha eppavume pesuven. Amma enkitta pesunadhe illa oru naalum"

(Bu..but how will Mom listen to what I say? It's always just me who talks. She has never spoken to me, not even once)

"Apdiyaa? Illaye pesa kandipa muyarchi panneerpaanga. Aana mudiyaama poyirukkum"

(Is that so? No, she would have definitely tried to talk. But maybe she couldn’t do it)

"Yen?"

(Why?)

I asked her right away, wondering if I had done something wrong that might have caused my mother to not speak to me yet.

But, she stared at me simply.

"Sollu, Seetha"

(Tell me)

I urged her and noticed tears welling up in her eyes. I swallowed hard as a tear from her left eye rolled down on her cheek as she blinked. But, she turned away, wiped it with her arm, then looked back at me and said,

"Seri. Ippo neenga yendha vishyatha nenachu romba happy'aah feel pandringlo adha vaanatha paathu amma kitta sollungo. Amma pesuraangalaa nu paapo. Okay aah?"

(Now think about something that makes you very happy and share that with Mom. Let's see if she talks to you, okay?)

I opened my mouth to ask her how that would be possible, but,

"But, adhu sandhoshamaana vishyangalaa mattum dha irukkanum"

(But it should be only things that make you happy.)

She pointed it out again. I gulped and lowered my gaze, trying to think of what happiness surrounds me. Just then, I noticed our intertwined hands.

I looked at her, feeling a mix of fear and uncertainty thinking about her reaction if I took this step. Taking a deep breath, I turned my gaze to the clear sky and gently clasped both of her hands in mine.

"Amma. She's Seetha. Nee kettiyaa ma? Super'aah paadunaa le? Maa. Unakkum theriyum'le? She loves me. Romba nalla ponnu ma. Nee.. nee enna epdi ellaa edathulayum vittu kudukkaama iruppiyo apdiye dha ma ivalum irukkaa. Naan saapadu pudikala nu unna thittunaalum, nee enakku vera senju kuduppa le ma? Andha maadhiri naan evlo dhadava venaa venaa nu sonnaalum enna vittu pogaama thirumba enkittaye varaa ma. Eppavume nee pesa maatiyaa nu nenachu enna pathi mattume dha ma unkitta pesuven. Aana inniku naan enna pathi pesa poradhu illa ma. Yen'naa.. "

(Mom. She's Seetha. Do you know? She sings so beautifully. And mom, you know, right? She loves me. She's a really good girl. Even if I scold you for not liking food, you'll still take care of me, right? Just like that, no matter how much I scold her, she always comes back to me without leaving. Thinking that, you never talk to me,  I only spoke to you about my feelings. But today, I'm not going to talk about me, Mom. And do you know why...?)

I stopped when I felt a little weight on my shoulder and looked to see her resting her head there, hesitantly. I took a deep breath and continued,

"Naan sandhoshamaana vishyam mattum dha unkitta inniku pesanum nu Seetha solleerkaa, ma"

(Seetha says that today I should only talk to you about things that make me happy, Mom.)

I rested my cheek on top of her head and whispered,

"Amma. Mudhal muraiyaa, I can feel you around me, ma"

(For the first time)

I smiled at the sky as a tear from the corner of my eye fell onto her hair. She pulled back, wiped her tears with her arms while keeping our hands intertwined, and looked at me. I smiled back at her, and through her tears, she returned my smile.

But, when I tried to pull my hand away, she gripped it even tighter and,

"Naan onnu sollanu"

(I have something to say)

She quickly said, looking into my eyes. I furrowed my brows.

"Enna?"

(What?)

"Naan ungala love pandren"

(I'm in love with you)

I stared at her.

"Neenga nenaikardhukkum mela rombaaa romba love pandren"

(I love you so much more than you could ever imagine)

I opened my mouth to tell her that I understood the depth of her love for me. But before I could speak, she slipped her right hand free from mine and gently covered my mouth with it.

"Neengalum pannunga"

(You do it too)

What?

I stared into her eyes, now blurred with tears. And, I could feel her hand trembling against my mouth.

"Naan ungala nannaa paathukuren Aayush sir. Enna kalyanam pannikongo"

(I'll take good care of you, Aayush sir. Please marry me)

She hurried through every single word, leaving me stunned and speechless. My widened eyes met her pleading, tear-filled gaze, and I wondered,

When the hell did her love for me turn into the thought of marrying me?

**************

TBC..

Epdi irundhuchu?

Next chapter, we'll see Seetha's pov, there you can understand her feelings better 🌝

Hopefully, this chapter isn't cringey or anything. I don't know why, but I feel insecure about both the previous and this chapter 🚶🏻‍♀️

Please vote and comment ❤️🙏🏻

See you all in the next update, bubyee🚴‍♀️💜🦋