• ADVIKA •

“Harsh, I can explain this—”

But before I could even try to explain, my beloved man cut through my words like he always did. “Okay, explain. Let me see how efficiently you could bluff this time.”

“Harsh,” I called his name with a sense of carefulness. “We need to talk. Listen, I've been planning to do this, but—”

“Planning to do what? Fuck other men behind my back? Seriously, Advika!”

Okay, why does he sound like he had never thought of women other than me?

“I'm telling you, Harsh. We need to talk in privacy. I can explain this.” Shifting my focus towards Ishaan, I requested, “Ishaan, could you please—”

“I understand,” he interrupted me, suggesting that he was way more understanding than my boyfriend who was also my would-be ex. “I'll wait outside.”

As he walked out of the house and closed the door, Harsh shot a demanding glare at me and asked, “Tell me.”

“Harsh.” Due to my inability to say what I wanted to despite my mind suggesting thousands of words I had for him, I paused for a moment while my mind summarised it all in that moment. As I was done, I said, “We need to break up,” instead of wasting time beating around the bush.

“What?” A flabbergasted Harsh let out a chuckle of disbelief, which I soon wiped off with that one monologue I have been practising ever since the thought of ending things with him hit my mind.

“I mean it, Harsh. You know, this one year with you was very memorable. I may sound like I'm lying, but it's true. You, my first love, have given me many best moments in my life to cherish with. I thought you were my life, my love, and my soul.

“But then, as our relationship went on, I learnt that we are no good match but a source of destruction for each other.” After pausing a little to notice the perplexion in his face, I continued, “I feel that I'm no longer being myself when I'm around you. I feel afraid to express my honest feelings and opinions when I'm with you. When it comes to you, being honest feels like a punishment to me. I understand that love is all about making sacrifices. But, sacrificing everything— that I may end up with nothing to lose— in the name of love? I don't think that's how a relationship works.

“I know our relationship drains you out as well. And, I understand that. Hence, for the sake of your mental health and mine, I think that it's wise to split ways. I hope you—”

He started laughing his ass off as if whatever I uttered for the last minute meant nothing. Or, did he inhale nitrous oxide instead of oxygen?

“How funny my ex is!” Just as he uttered those words, I realised that he was being fake for the gazillionth time. “You know what, Advika? I think you need to start a stand-up comedy show. I'm sure it will sell more tickets than an IPL match. Why did you break up? Because, I care a lot about my mental health and my ex's. Oh, please! Stop using technical terms like mental health to back your cheater behaviour. That would help better. I may sound like I'm lying, but then, it was a good speech. Great job!”

“Thank you, Mr Mathur. I use my brains  better when you're not here.” As I confirmed that his saccharine smile vanished, I wore a smile and continued, “And talking about technical terms… Well, do they scare you a lot? No wonder you're losing the argument and the girl. Now if you could excuse me, I would continue clearing the trash in my house. To start with you, it would be of great help if you walk out the same way you entered. So, please.” Pointing to the door, I knew that there couldn't be a more direct way than this to ask him to get out of my house— and my life.

That was the last time I saw my first love: with his fake unaffected chuckle while his eyes said that he was aware of his defeat. As he walked out of my house for one last time while shooting his oh-so-scary glance at Ishaan, the latter entered my house and asked, “Is everything alright?”

“After a long time, yes.”

***

As I was done narrating what happened in his absence, Ishaan and I went on a spree of laughing like maniacs.

“Did you do that for real?” He asked and continued laughing while I nodded a yes due to my inability to explain further. “That's iconic shit. No wonder I chose to love you out of all those women in two universes.”

Despite continuing to laugh further, its intensity lessened as I processed what he said. Silence engulfed us as I drifted into my thinking space.

We didn't know much of each other, yet he chose to fall for me. Even after that he knew almost nothing about me.

Soon, I heard Ishaan suggest, “Advika, let's play a game.” As I tilted my head as if to ask what, he added, “Let's exchange information about each other. I had this form ready for us. So… Why not fill it?”

This man named Ishaan Ahuja definitely is someone else. Someone who is using all of his superpowers only to understand me.

“When did you even prepare the form?” I questioned with my mind pondering over the same.

“Made in Milan, m'lady,” he replied with his voice so smooth that it swept my feet effortlessly.

“Oh, great!” I beamed and sat upright, preparing myself for the game.

As he gave me the form, I filled in the answers for the questions he had given.

Name: Advika Bansal

Favourite Colour: Grey
Favourite Movie: Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara
Favourite Series: Bridgerton
Favourite Author: Emily Henry
Favourite Music Artist: Taylor Swift, One Direction (I know it's a band), Olivia Rodrigo
Favourite Song (that ONE song): Watermelon Sugar
Favourite Actor: Good ones.
Favourite Actress: Good ones.
Favourite Book: Have a lot more, babes! But then… I'll go with Better Than The Movies.

Biggest Strength: Instinct-driven
Biggest Weakness: Instinct-driven
Biggest Dream: To build the strongest Bookstagram community.
Biggest Fear: Red flags.
Biggest Insecurity: Trusting and loving the red flags.

I handed over my form to Ishaan while he handed over his to me.

Name: Ishaan Ahuja

Favourite Colour: White
Favourite Movie: Forrest Gump
Favourite Author: Not a fan of books, baby!
Favourite Music Artist: Taylor Swift
Favourite Song (that ONE song): Anything you say.
Favourite Actor: Nil
Favourite Actress: Nil
Favourite Book: The Silent Patient

Biggest Strength: You
Biggest Weakness: Your eyes
Biggest Dream: Being your man for the rest of our lives.
Biggest Fear: Losing you.
Biggest Insecurity: The obstacles for us.

Being your man for the rest of our lives.

Though I moved on from the moment physically, my mind screamed that line in his voice.

***

Though I promised to update after a week or two, I realised that I completed writing this sooner than expected. Hence, I published it.

But next time, I'll keep up the promise. I do have to update after a short break due to the exams (and I haven't started writing the next chapter yet).

Don't think that I'll be on hiatus. Only no updates for two weeks.

See you soon, peeps!