THE ULTIMATE FRISBEE ISSUE

by linc789

As I headed off by myself to my first activity, I was bubbling with excitement. I thought to myself, I did so well last time I played. Last week, I knocked down so many frisbees that my hand got bruised. That still wouldn't stop me from doing the same and blowing the boys' minds this time. But I was wrong.

The Ultimate Frisbee group set the parameters of the field for the game, chose the teams, and the supervisors made sure that we knew the rules. The starter and leader from the other team, Adrian, stepped up and threw the frisbee over to the other side. I watched in awe as the frisbee sailed straight and flew far, like all perfect throws are. Not that I couldn't do it myself, there's just something entrancing about every perfect throw of a frisbee; with the perfect spin, perfect angle, and perfect height. The white disc fought the gusts of wind and succeeded, landing flat without rolling on the other side of the field.

Adrian bowed as a joke and quickly ran to join his teammates. As our group leader, Oliver, threw it to Ronaldo from our group, and Ronaldo caught it with difficulty. I scoffed inwardly, knowing that I could've made a better pass. I raised my hand to show that I was not guarded, but Ronaldo passed it to some other guy. As we made progress through the field, Adrian's team upped the guard, and on the next throw, he quickly slapped it down. My right hand rubbed the inside of my left hand. I had probably slapped down too many frisbees on the edge last time, but I noticed that Adrian used a different technique. He would come from the side, jump, hook his arm so that his palm was facing the top of the frisbee, and slap the frisbee from the top, not from the edge like I did. I had never seen that before, and made a mental note to try it out later in the game. Only I never got the chance.

Now Adrian's team has it, our team was on defense now. I ran into position right between Ronaldo and Adrian. Adrian threw the frisbee to someone else. I repositioned myself. He threw it to Ronaldo, making a high pass so I couldn't slap it. I repositioned myself. Ronaldo threw it to some other guy, and Adrian's team scored a point. 1-0.

So that was how it went for about twenty minutes. Then, Oliver, our team leader, was stuck in a tough position, because people from Adrian's team were on close guard on all of our male teammates. Then Taeyeon from SCEN A, our Physics course, piped up with some very 'helpful' advice.

"Don't be afraid to pass it over the girls' heads. They won't reach up and grab it. They won't run. They won't even try." My insides flared with indignation with this super sexist advice from my classmate, but I told myself that it was no biggie, and I'll get a chance to show him later. I didn't get the chance.

Oliver, of course, followed Taeyeon's advice and threw it right over my friend Martha's head. She must have been unaware of it and tripped when she tried to grab the high pass out of the air. I rushed over to her when she started getting up.

"Are you okay?" I asked her.

"I'm fine, Ja-Qua(that's how she pronounces my name, Chia-Hua)," she replied. "It's so unfair that the boys are treating us like this." I felt like I should comfort Martha; she already proved herself worthy in Death Rugby yesterday, she tackled everyone at least once, but none of the boys accepted her yet. I didn't comfort her. Rather, I ran off to be in good position for a pass from Oliver. I guess that would be enough motivation for her to do the same.

I put my hand in the air, signaling that I was not guarded and he can pass to me. Oliver passed to another boy, who passed it to Ronaldo. As Ronaldo hesitated because he was well guarded at the time and the only people left unguarded were girls from our team, Taeyeon made is second cutting statement.

"Don't pass it to the girls, the girls are your weaknesses." Ronaldo followed his rotten advice, and the game went on.

Now, you are probably wondering, "What on Earth are the supervisors doing about this? Why is nothing happening?" Well, the answer to that will be because another adult joined them and they started chatting away, paying attention only never. It wasn't their fault, anyways. I want to show the boys who treated us girls badly in Ultimate Frisbee how well I can actually play.

The thing that hurts me most is that Ronaldo knew how I played. Last week, he was actually one of two boys and the one other girl, Martha, who gave me compliments. He always passed to either me or Mia, and we have already proven to him how strategic we are. But he knew I was a top player, and he still wouldn't pass it to me. Ever. Just because I was born a girl.

Thirty-five minutes had passed already, and I still hadn't eventouched the white disc. None of the five girls had. Even though we were in the right spots. Even though we always followed the Triangle principle of passing in sports that most of them probably didn't even know about. They are people who believe that girls are only annoying obstacles when it comes to sports. They are people who believe that girls don't play sports, and would cause them to lose. They are people who assume without thinking. Without observing. Without actuallyknowing. This is what hurts me the most.

I sat down on the grass, not even trying anymore. There would be no difference between trying and giving up. I watched as the boys happily passed the frisbee back and forth, and wondered if they actually knew how hurt you feel when you know you can do a great job, but other people never allow you to demonstrate it. The more I thought about it, the sadder and more hurt I became, and the more these horrible moments became engraved into my memory. Martha saw me with my head down, and came over.

"What's wrong, Ja-Qua?" She sat down beside me, and I started crying because I needed to vent my emotions out. I didn't care about how any of the boys saw me anymore, I just need the right kind of friend to help me through this and not to explode on myself because of my hurt. My words came out in a tumble.

"Look at them. Look at the frisbee. Do you remember the last thirty-five minutes? Did you ever see a girl even touch that frisbee?" I emotionally flew into a rage, and I couldn't hold in my anger at the boys anymore. Part of me hoped that Martha was the right kind of friend to make it all better. Unfortunately, she lapsed into silence.

"I'll go tell the RAs," (An RA is a "Residential Aid") Martha said. I watched as she walked off in the direction of the supervisors. Shortly after that, they called out a new rule.

"You have to pass to a person of the opposite gender!" One of our supervisors yelled out. I decided to watch for a while longer to see if it made any difference. It didn't.

Everything continued the same as before. Inside, a huge tsunami of hopelessness and anger washed over me. Anger, pure anger at the boys, and only the boys, coursed through me. This wasn't how girls are supposed to be treated, when it comes to anything. There were no rules before, and they ignored us. Now there was a rule that said you couldn't ignore us, they were still doing it as if nothing had happened and there wasn't a single girl there. A new, freezing wave of hopelessness drowned out the fire of my anger. Suddenly, the dams that kept me from crying right then and there broke, and I hung my head and burst into tears, cross-legged on the ground.

Martha came around to comfort me another time. She sat down beside me and patted my back. "There's a rule now, Ja-Qua. Now, the boys have to pass to girls now."

"But they aren't!" I practically yelled, "There's absolutely no difference!!"

"Yes there is. Look at Mia and Zoe and Sophia! They are out there and playing, and they are getting the frisbee like crazy. Their fingerprints are on that frisbee now, and mine are too. If you don't get up and show them what you could do, they won't pass it to you." Martha practically snapped at me, and it didn't make me feel any better. Her words make it sound like I had to earn the right to participate in any sport, and it goes against what I think about sports. Why are boys born with a right to play sports when they want to? Why do girls have to earn the right to play sports along with the boys? Why do people make it so much harder for girls to earn it? And even though some boys have to earn it too, why do people make it so much easier for them to participate than girls? Whichever way I think about it, it seems unfair to me and ends up hurting me more.

Martha walked away, seemingly frustrated that she couldn't help me. Part of me knew that I was being pessimistic, but I couldn't really help it. I replayed Taeyeon's words to myself numerous times, the pain in my chest grew until I had to squeeze my eyelids together.

Then the really surprising, probably the most unlikely thing happened. I felt a pat on my back, and I turned around to see who it was. I was expecting Martha or one of the supervisors, but no. Adrian -the leader of the opposite team - came up to me. I was so shocked for a moment. He was the oppositeeverything from me. Opposite gender, opposite halls, opposite rank, opposite team, oppositeabsolutely everything. The leader of the other team left his own team to comfort a person that most of the people here despised.

He walked around me, facing me all the while, and he sat down in front of me, still holding my hand for comfort.

"Are you okay?" This was a stranger, a person I never met before. I only knew his name from his peer's cheering.

I shook my head.

"You know, people are just pathetic sometimes. Nobody's perfect. What people call 'common sense' just isn't right. And those people out there? The ones who totally ignore you? They are the ones that believe wrongly. You aren't wrong in this matter. They are. So don't cry because you are right. Get up and know that you hold the right perspective and are stronger than they are. Get up and go show them how a person they once despised could do better, believe better than they ever could. Don't give up."

"This isn't Extreme Ultimate Frisbee. This isn't the activity I signed up for. This is Extremely Sexist Ultimate Frisbee," I almost yelled.

Adrian stood up from the crouching position he was in. He never let go of my hand. Instead, he pulled me up and looped an arm around my shoulders and neck, practically pushing me towards the main field while I crossed my arms in a position of defence and retreat. I walked bluntly, busy processing this information in my head. How did this happen? Who is this Adrian? Why did he stick up for me?

We had a rearrangement of teams after that. I joined Adrian's team, while Martha switched spots with me into Oliver's.

Now, I still can't completely understand. Adrian put equality above winning, above friends and buddies, above humiliation, above common sense. He really believed that everyone should be treated the same, and that people should be happy and help each other. Of course, we all know that, but Adrian was the only person that ever put that into action. He was a complete stranger, and he still helped another stranger that everything and everyone else told him not to. Adrian and I were opposites on so many different levels, and he was still willing to help. Adrian has been agreat friend, even though we didn't even know each other. For that, I respect Adrian.