Hello! Have a blessed Friday, loves! Thanks a lot for your support, once again. I really appreciate it. 😭❤️

This one's dedicated to anthea555 ! You are absolutely amazing. 😍

Enjoooooy! 💕

|Chapter 28|

The second my eyes opened this morning, it felt like I was new. Like I was born again, fresh and breathing. Alive and animate. I loved the feeling. I felt lighter, like the weight on my shoulders has been lifted off me. And honestly, I don't remember the last time I felt that way.

It was when I remembered why I felt that way, that I was flooded with absolute terror. The memories of last night started playing like a broken record, over and over again. All the highlights replayed, as if they wanted me to regret my actions. To regret everything that slipped from my mouth.

And I began to.

It's like my conscience literally hated me. Like it only wanted to put me down. To make me hate myself and the world around me. It mocked me and taunted me.

You're going to regret what you've done, soon.

You're repeating your mistakes.

It will only go in circles.

Are you enjoying getting hurt? Because you're only bring it to yourself.

You're a moron.

You will have to take the full responsibility of your stupid actions.

It felt like I was being bullied by myself. And thinking about that made me feel like I'm mentally sick. However, my conscience is absolutely right. What I did yesterday could lead to two things: the first being the beginning of another year of being implacably bullied, and the second being a friendship that could actually be successful.

And I hope it's the latter.

I don't know what's gotten over me yesterday, but I couldn't take it anymore. It has been absolutely hectic. It was like bomb after bomb was dropped on me and I was the one to explode. The final bomb that Eleanor dropped was the one to make me cause a massive destruction. A gruesome catastrophe. The sadness I saw in her eyes reminded me of mine when I met my reflection everyday. It was heartbreaking. And so, I had to let it all go. It was like I was sinking in the ocean due a heavy weight I was carrying with me, and I had only two choices: either to drop all the weight and breathe the oxygen I've been longing for, or keep sinking as the water suffocated me to death. I had to drop everything. I had to let everything sink into the deepest pits of my memories so that hopefully, they wouldn't resurface again.

   Nevertheless, I didn't feel remorse. Not the slightest bit. And I was fretting over whether or not that was something to be petrified with fear of, because the Elizabeth before yesterday's dinner would have slapped herself twice for only thinking about spilling the beans about her pathetic past. And Elizabeth, today, is feeling hopeful about the future.

Eleanor and Justin gave me hope.

   I'm not going to lie; I am slightly scared of what the trust I have in the siblings could do to me. It could either destroy me, completely, or heal me, once and for all. But I have an odd feeling, in me, that they're worth the risk.

What's happening to me?

   I decided it was time to leave my beloved bed and start getting ready for this school day. I did my boring morning routine of taking a shower, brushing my teeth, and doing my makeup.

It was just a few minutes before I was finally headed to school. I felt nervous. More nervous than I have ever before. I was afraid of what my fate held for me. I knew it would be way different, now that I've opened up and showed my real self to Eleanor and Justin, however, the rest of the students in this school do not have to know about it. To them, I must stay the same person I was.

I wasn't looking forward to hanging out with El and Justin all that much. I don't know how to act around them, since I'm a very socially awkward person, and no one ever liked me. I started asking myself questions that I'd only find the answer to in the coming future. Would the students of my school think of me the same, even if I have two friends? Does it mean that I have to hang out with Eleanor and Justin's friends just because I hang out with the both of them? Did I plan my own death by opening up to them?

I was standing in front of my school gates, staring at everyone as they laughed and talked with their friends. The moment I entered the school's ground, I was being stared at from every direction. I glared at every person my eyes met, causing their heads to jerk to the other direction. I kept walking, head held high, and I ignored everyone's hushed whispers and stares.

Across the distance, standing in front of her locker, was Eleanor, smiling cheerfully like every other day. I slowly, hesitantly, and nervously approached her. Her smile widened and was replaced with an amiable grin so contagious that it made me do that same.

"Hey, Liz! How are you feeling, today?" she asked, happily. I shyly looked at the ground before replying, "better. I wanted to thank you for bearing with my explosion. I-I feel the happiest I've ever felt in a while now. Thanks."

I don't think I've ever seen Eleanor grin so wide before, and it's not even an exaggeration. It's like she was genuinely happy for my joy, and that made my heart flutter. I didn't want to get too excited about it, however, because hopes and high expectations could be lost and crushed in seconds.

"My pleasure, Elizabeth. That's what friends do, ain't that right?" she asked me rhetorically, winking my way before following my journey to my locker. My heart skipped a beat at the word "friend", and because my head was used to reacting that way, it made me think of all the worst scenarios. However, I tried my best to shake every negative thought off.

"Ah, trust you to say such a cliché thing," I smirked. She laughed, her head tilting to the back, her eyes closing, and her nose scrunching. She punched me in the shoulder, playfully.

"You should get used to it. I'm a big cheeseball," she stated, leaning against the locker next to me, waiting for me to pick up the books necessary for today's classes.

"Oh, no," I whined, dramatically, earning another punch from her.

I was enjoying this way too much.

   My body turned around as I was getting ready to walk with Eleanor to our Biology class. However, I stopped in my tracks at the sight of everyone whispering things obviously about me.

"Are they friends now?"

"Is she being nice?"

"The monster is being friendly? I can't believe my eyes."

   I've got to admit. Their words hurt me a little bit. To them, I was a monster. To them, I was a rude person. But I couldn't blame them for thinking so. I'm the one who wanted them to think so, so I have to take responsibility for my own actions.

"Don't you people have anything better to do than gossip? Mind your own business!" I spat at everyone my angry eyes met. That caused them to do exactly as I told them to. But it didn't satisfy me. I frowned, sadly. I didn't like the fact that I'm the bad person. I just... didn't want to be someone I'm not. It didn't make me comfortable.

But I have to.

"Hey, listen, we're in this together."

  Those words were everything I needed to smile again. To breathe again. Because after all, I'm not alone, anymore. I have two friends, now.

And we're in this fight together.