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|Chapter 22|

   I ran towards the front door in a hurry, trying my best to breathe steadily. I entered the house with Eleanor behind me and in the living room I saw my dad. He looked very worried, just sitting there and staring at the ground, his foot tapping on the floor very loudly.

"Dad," I whispered as I entered the room. His head snapped towards my direction and a look of utter relief made its way to his fretted face.

"I-I don't know what happened. She just came back from school crying her eyes off. She has a bad scratch, that your mother cleansed, on her knee. We tried asking her why she's crying but she wouldn't tell us. She kept saying 'I want Izzy'. Please go upstairs and see what's going on," he pleaded. I nodded and ran upstairs.

   My hand touched her door's handle and stayed there. My eyes shut close as I tried to calm myself as much as possible. I didn't want my little sister to see me broken and torn. I wanted to stay strong for her.

   I felt a hand on my shoulder. It was Eleanor. She gave me a sincere, reassuring smile that gave me the confidence I needed. I didn't hesitate before opening Sophia's bedroom door.

   Mom was sitting on the bed next to a sleeping Sophia.

"Hi," I whispered. I was on the verge of tears. I couldn't help it.

I failed myself and my sister.

"She cried herself to sleep," Mom stated somberly. That's when the tears that have been threatening to slip away were set free.

  My crying was silent, for I tried my best not to wake Sophia up with my sobbing. But it hurt to keep it all in. I fell on the floor and curled myself into a ball.

   I never wanted to let anyone see me crying. I always promised myself that I wasn't going to let anyone see me break down. But today, I failed.

   Mom looked at me with so much shock. She never saw me cry during my teenage years. It was only when I scraped my arms, lost my teddy bear, or something silly of that sort, as a child, that she did. But today was different.

   Eleanor sat on the floor next to me and enveloped me in a warm embrace. It wasn't a few seconds later that my mom did the same. I cried in the middle.

"I failed her. I promised her she'd never be left alone. I promised her that she'll never find a reason to cry herself to sleep. I promised myself that I'm going to give her the childhood every kid deserves. But I've failed myself, and most importantly, I failed Sophia. I failed my little sister. I hate myself.

"I hate myself and I hate that my sister had to cry herself to sleep to forget the pain. She doesn't deserve this. What did she do for this to happen to her? She's always kind and sweet to everyone."

"I know, sweetie. I know. You raised her that way. She always listened to your advices to her. She loves you dearly, Elizabeth. Probably more than she loves me. And you definitely didn't fail her. But this is life, and it's unfortunate that the greatest people experience the most pain," Mom comforted.

"You're amazing, Elizabeth. Sophia is really proud and happy to have you as a sister," Eleanor said, giving me a small smile.

"How do you know?" my voice croaked as I asked.

"She told me she is." She winked and I smiled.

"Come on, stand up and eat something until your sister wakes up." Mom gave me a hand to stand up. I took it and fixed my shirt.

"I'm going to wait for her to wake up." I grabbed her tea-party, tiny chair and placed it next to her bed. Eleanor did the same thing, and we sat next to each other, looking up at my sleeping sister.

"Alright, well, tell me if there's any progress," she said before leaving the room and closing the door behind her.

We both sat in silence for an hour or so. We said nothing. Eleanor was reading something on her phone while I just searched for any possible reason worthy of my sister crying herself to sleep.

Did a teacher yell at her? Did she embarrass herself in any way? Did someone embarrass her? Was she bullied?

The thought of my sister experiencing the pain I do breaks me apart. It shatters me into a million pieces. It hurts more seeing someone so important to me in pain, than experiencing pain myself.

I wanted to be the first person she threw herself on today. I wanted to be the shoulder she cried on. But I'm glad she didn't hide her pain. I couldn't imagine my sister acting okay in front of us while she's being torn apart inside. The image itself makes me shiver.

"Izzy?" she whispered. My eyes were in contact with hers. Her eyes were red, puffy, and tired. Her fingers rubbed them furiously.

"Soph." I sat on her bed and took her in for a warm, comforting hug.

"I'm going to leave you guys for a bit," Eleanor excused herself and left the room.

"Liz, today was so hard," she started ranting. "After school, Shailee and I went to the park to play. We were having so much fun until Cassandra and Jasmine came along. They started being mean to me. Not only Cass and Jas, also Shailee. They made fun of my height and my clothes and they called me ugly," my heart clenched and my breath hitched in my throat. With every word she uttered, my heart broke a little more. It's like deja vu, like history is repeating itself. "Then, they pushed me from the slide and I got a very painful scratch on my knee. It hurt so much, El. I couldn't stay, because they called me a baby for crying. So, then, I ran back home."

   She started crying again. She held me tight and cried on my shoulders. I stroked her back and let her cry, while I swallowed the lumps in my throat and tried my best to keep myself from crying. When her cries turned into sniffs, I started talking.

"Listen, Sophia. Life is full of good and bad people. You can't change them. They will stop being themselves when they choose to. That's why, you should distance yourself from the people who make you feel bad about yourself, and stay close to the ones who make you feel great. It's important to choose your friends properly. Maybe Cassandra, Jasmine, and Shailee aren't the best people in the world, but that doesn't mean that everyone is bad.

"You can't exactly run away from getting hurt, because life is very hard. But you learn from your bad experiences. You'll make many friends in the future. Some will stay and some won't. But you'll find someone that will stay with you through the thick and thin.

"You're not alone, okay? I've been hurt just like you, and I'm still alive. You're a strong girl, I know it. And I'm proud that you decided to talk to me about this. Talking to people about your feelings is the best way to move on.

"You're a beautiful girl, and you shouldn't let anyone make you believe otherwise. You aren't perfect, but your flaws are beautiful in their own ways. I love you, Sophia, and so many other people do, too."

"Thank you so much, Liz. You're the best ever. I'm so happy you're my sister," she said, looking at me with her big, beautiful eyes. I wiped away her tears.

"Let's go downstairs and eat, okay?" She nodded and held my hand.

"El?" she called.

"Yes, Soph?" I stopped to bend down to her height.

"You're beautiful, too." She grinned widely.

For the first time in my life, I believed it.