Hey there! Thanks a lot for sticking around, my lovely readers! I'm sorry, for this chapter is shorter than my other chapters. Biggest reason is that my mood lately reflected in my writing and I went through a phase of no inspiration for a while, so instead of writing this chapter a few days before today, I had to quickly write all I can so that I can post it in time for all of you to read. I apologize, once more!

I dedicate this chapter to misbelievingly ! ❤️

Enjoy reading, fellas! =)

|Chapter 20|

"Hello, Elizabeth! How are you?"

It's crazy how such a simple sentence coming from a lovely woman can make me so nervous. I didn't want to be rude to her. I didn't want to ignore her greeting. It felt so very wrong, so I didn't. My feet suddenly gave up on me and I struggled to stay put. My heart was beating uncontrollably and as usual, beads of sweat formed on my forehead. I felt so hot, and my cheeks were most definitely flushed a deep color of red.

"I'm g-good, thanks. H-how are y-you?" I stuttered nervously.

"Great, as well," she said, smiling sweetly. "Are you staying over for lunch?"

My eyes widened, and after internally panicking, I replied, "What? N-no! No, no, no." I cleared my throat nervously and paused for a breather. I heard Eleanor chuckle beside me, which made me even more embarrassed than I already am. "My, um, family is w-waiting for me to, um, come home and h-have lunch with t-them in an hour."

"Alright then," she said after looking at me as if I'm some sort of circus clown.

I'm not blaming her, honestly. I always fail to prove to people that I'm a normal person. I stutter when talking to any human. I hate it. I really do. It's like I'm absolutely tongue-tied and am unable to form simple words. It takes me time to breathe and process what I'm going to say, and when I do finally decide to speak, I still stutter. Sometimes, I don't even form any word. I become speechless and inarticulate. It sucks. I really hate it.

"Let's get started," Eleanor said before pointing at the staircase and running upstairs. I gave her mom an awkward small smile before running behind her with Bary within my hands.

We entered her room in silence, and just like the last time I came over, we sat down and started doing our research on the laptop. We asked each other questions and answered them with evidence and fact support from the internet. Then, we pasted our information on the document and did all the boring stuff students with projects do.

I almost fell asleep three times.

Eleanor shut down the computer and turned around, crossing her legs, to look at me. An evil smile crept upon her visage while she stared into my eyes.

"You looked sad today, after school. Why?" she asked. I scrunched my eyebrows in confusion.

I never smile in school. Not when I enter that hellhole, nor when I leave it. I don't find a reason and I'm not planning to. That's the reason I'm confused of why she chose today to ask me why I didn't look happy.

Why do I look sad in school, today and everyday?

It would take ages for me to explain all the reasons why. High school is a place where students experience, learn and teach. It's a place where students aspire to become what they want to be. It's a place where students enjoy their favorite subjects and groan at the thought of attending their most hated ones. It's a place where students smile as they enter it and see their friends. It's a place where every student attends parties, joins school clubs, does crazy dares, breaks a few rules, and goes through many adventures. It's a place where students spend the best years of their lives in.

But for me, it's the exact opposite.

It's hard to like school when all my memories of this place are the worst I ever remember. When all the experiences are atrocious, and all the things I learn are as a result of such experiences. I enter this place in so much fear and grief, and exit in so much relief. I don't have any friends that I itch to meet, and it's school that made me decide that I want none. It's the fact that I have no excitement in my school life that makes me dislike most of the subjects and have absolutely no idea what I aspire to become.

I doubt it's possible for someone to feel more lost in life than I am.

So, when Eleanor asked me that question, I answered her in a very simple, short reply.

"School never gave me a reason to be happy."