I Have to Go
~Flashback~
One day before the end of treatment
Anti was out. Despite his treatment ending tomorrow, Anti still arrived. Less often than normal, but Anti was still very real. He had his back pressed against the wall, his head tilted back. "I don't want to go." He weakly said. He clenched his fist until his hand turned red.
"I don't want you to go either," A voice said. "But you have to go. You're unhappy here. We're all unhappy here." The voice was coming from vent in the wall. The two talked often, as it was their only comfort in this retched Insane Asylum.
"I don't want to leave you. You deserve to go as much as me!" He screamed. "I'm just as insane as you. We both need to go." He whimpered helplessly.
"Life's not always fair, Anti. Take your chance while you still have one." She pleaded. She knew he would stay, just for her. He would do anything for her.
There was silence from the other side of the wall. Behind the vent. She was afraid he had left out of anger. She pressed her ear to the vent listening for any sign he was still there. She heard his gentle breathing and heaved a sigh of relief.
"Do you know how to open a vent?" He asked. She smiled ear to ear. "Yeah, I do. Would you like me to?" Her heart pumped faster. "I would like that." He softly said. She could tell he smiled. She used her fingernails to pry of the small vent, and let it clank to the tile floor. "Done." She whispered.
She heard a clank from his end and heard some rustling. She reached her arm inside the vent and felt her hand touch his. There was electricity pumping through Anti's heart. He grasped her hand and held it tight. They both didn't dare move. Anti had never seen her before, and she hadn't seen him either. This was the closest they've ever been to each other.
"This damn wall." She said, interlacing her fingers with his. They sat in silence, feeling each others hands. Neither of them wanted to forget this. It seems like they sat for hours, just holding hands. They both fell asleep on the floor, refusing to let go.
Soon the sun lifted above the horizon, shining light through the window. Anti awoke first to the sound of rustling feet. He shook her hand and she awoke immediately. "Anti, what's going on?" She said, scared, even though she knew what was coming.
"They're here." He said calmly. "No, no, no!" She screamed. "Don't go!" She said, grasping tightly to his hand. "Please don't go!" She whimpered.
"I promise I'll come back." He said, stroking her hand softly.
She was frantic and desperate. She wanted to see him. She wanted to be near him. "Wait two more minutes," she whispered through the vent. She slowly let go of his hand, regretting every movement. She started to cry as she made her way to her desk. She tore off a small piece of paper from her journal.
She could hardly see the paper through her tears. She stared at her pen container, unable to grab one. She finally grasped onto one and started to write out her old address in agony.
"Wait! Don't!" Anti harshly whispered from the other side of the vent. "Don't you dare go near the pens!" He demanded.
All Anti could hear were the faint sobs as she wrote. All Anti could hear were the thumping footsteps as they came closer. Thump. Thump. Thump.
Anti was the only one that knew about her fears. Her fear of blood. Her fear of knifes. The sound of fingers on the chalkboard made her nearly go insane. And she was deathly afraid of pens. He heard her screaming through the vent once when she had to sign something. Blood curdling screams. He never thought she'd touch another pen for anyone.
He heard one last whimper as she shoved her hand back into the vent. He felt her hand touch his as she she placed a small slip of paper into his hand. He felt warm blood on her fingers. He gulped. Suddenly the door swung open and the nurse was standing in the doorway.
"Jack, we're ready for you." She saw his hand in the vent and got a look of sternness. "Anti?" She inquired. "Nah, it's me." Anti lied. He got up slowly. His fingers slowly released from hers, one by one. First the thumbs, then the pointer and the middle and the pinky. Until only their ring fingers touched. Anti heard her final sob come from the vent.
"I love you." She said. She meant it.
The nurse started to walk over to the vent. "Is something wrong?" The words he so desperately wanted to say were caught in his throat. If he said it back, the nurse would notice.
"Nope." Jack said as he removed his hand from hers. The electricity in his heart faded and was replaced with the urge to jump out of the window. He clenched his fist and grinned. He was now just Jack. Depressed and lonely.
"The vent just fell off." Jack exclaimed, putting the cover back on, seeing the tips of her fingers retreat back to her side of the wall, painfully. He shoved the piece of paper into his jacket pocket for now.
"Good. Let's go." The nurse said, leading him out of the center to what was supposed to be freedom. But all he could think about was he never said I love you back.
GAHHH MY HEART. I don't know why I do this to myself. Prediction on who she is? What about bus lady? Who do you like more? So manny questions!!! Love you all. Bye! ✌️ ~Taylor
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