C h a p t e r F o u r

I fell back, my bottom landing harshly on the mossy ground beneath me. What was this? What was this other me - this other Emma? Was it real? Or was I hallucinating?

A twinkling of laughter alighted on my ears, and I snapped up, my brain once more confirming the impossible as the body drew closer.

It was me. But - unlike me - it was beautiful. I stared in shock as my eyes traveled up the white shimmering fabric, its slightly translucent quality hinting at the soft skin beneath. A gold braid cinched the waist, revealing a perfect hourglass figure, and from it, a deep neckline traveled up to embroidered sleeves that delicately draped off the dainty shoulders.

I gawked, half in shock of the situation and half in shock of seeing so much skin and cleavage being displayed on a body that was supposedly mine. Then my stupor ceased as I felt a chilling gaze bore into my skin.

Oh God. It was seeing me.

Perspiration broke out on my skin as I slowly forced myself to look up.

Ice blue eyes bored into mine with a terrifying gleam of pleasure. Blood-red lips pursed thoughtfully as perfectly shaped eyebrows raised in innocent surprise. Helpless, I sat as my other self raised a small hand, brushing away a golden curl from its high cheekbone and trailing it across the cascading tresses that tumbled down its back.

Then, with its cold eyes trapping my body, it smiled.

"Emma, my love. We finally meet." The musicality of its - no - her voice was a lullaby, flooding out to soothe my soul - yet there was an almost unnoticeable sharpness that accompanied it, a gravelly edge that sliced through like a warning. My goddess-like self began to travel closer, the white fabric gliding over the moss unhindered.

"I have always dreamed of this moment. And now you are here--truly here. With me."

My mind frantically searched for something intelligible to say, but it felt like my brain was literally unhinged.

"How...you...I am where? I mean - where I am? Wait - no. I..." My mouth felt like rubber as I tried to form the words.

Perfect. First opportunity to find out what in the world was going on, or - for that matter - what world this was, and I could not form a coherent sentence. A very unladylike groan escaped from my chapped lips, but my mouth snapped shut as a finger tilted my face up.

Those eyes. They were piercing, entrancing, beckoning.

The delicate finger moved from my chin to my hair, gently separating a strand of the frizzy mass as the roseate lips tisked in a chiding manner. Heat flooded up my face, and I suddenly became aware of my every imperfection, from the roughness of my hands to the shapelessness of my body.

"Oh, darling...life has not treated you well."

Her words brought tears to my eyes as, all of a sudden, every horrible thing that had happened in my seventeen years flooded before my vision. But out of all of these horrid experiences, only one memory of betrayal remained prominent, mocking me as it danced in my consciousness.

"Derin..." A tear slid down my cheek as the familiar wrench crushed my chest, and my other-self's thumb rubbed back and forth across my arm in a soothing manner.

"I know," she crooned. "I know."

My head lifted in confusion. "You...know?"

She smiled. It was a beautiful, pitying smile.

"How could I not? We are one, you and I. Of the same body and mind. Derin has hurt you beyond measure. Taking your heart and ripping it into countless shreds before your eyes. Such wrenching betrayal. Such hateful deception. The love he offered was a cruel lie - all he wanted was to destroy you...just like every other man."

Her vivid description sent my composure crashing. My tears overflowed, and she pulled me towards her, wrapping her arms around me as I sobbed. Hands stroked my over my matted hair, and her voice cooed in the vibrancy of its beautiful tones.

"I t-trusted him!" I blubbered as she rocked me back and forth. "Why would he do this? What did I do to make him suddenly hate me so much? He was so kind! He l-loved me! And now - he has m-murdered me!"

"Shhh...shhh...I know, love, I know. Life is terrible - there is no use in it. It serves only to torture its victims with deception and cruelty, taunting them with treats of sweetness - only to leave a bitterness in their mouths that will consume them forever...it's such a pity knowing you will have to return to that awful place."

My sniveling stopped. "Return? You mean...I'm not dead?"

"No! How amusing you are - of course you're not dead. If you were, where would I be?"

I blinked. "Oh."

"However, let me tell you a secret..." My beautiful self grasped her fingers around my neck, pulling me towards her so that her voice whispered secretly in my ear:

"I can go for you."

What? My body froze as her words sank deep in my mind like poison. She could...take my place?

A churning spread in my stomach, and I hesitated. "I-I don't know if that's--"

"Oh come, darling!" she exclaimed. "Surely you don't want to be stuck in that world! Surely you don't want to face Derin! Surely--" her voice dropped confidentially as she leaned in, "you don't want your heart broken again, do you?"

I stared into those ice blue eyes, my throat constricting. God. She was right. How could I go back and live without Derin, knowinghe was working for It's evil plan, knowing that I would be working against him - that I might even be ordered to kill him!

My features fell at that thought, and an overwhelming sorrow enveloped me. I stared at the goddess of myself in hopelessness. She was the beautiful one, she was better than me in every way. Unconsciously, a whimper escaped my mouth as a thought so painful, yet so true, seemed to punch me in the gut:

I was inferior - and the world trampled me because of it. I was not created for such a place.

My eyes traveled once more over the woman before me, taking in her utter perfection and magnificence. No. I was not created to live.

But she was.

"Go," I croaked, and despite my decision, the words felt wrong in my mouth. "Please...go for me."

She stared for a moment, as if in shock, but then the tips of her mouth curved up into a wide, chilling, almost....disturbing grin. Then, lifting her hand, she placed her fingers along the temples of my head.

"I will - and I will make good use of that body...very good use."

The connotation in her words seemed to slip by me as my mind began to feel groggy. My other-self's face hazed into two and I watched in fascination as the pair of lips parted, emitting a bone-shivering chuckle. The strength in my body was rapidly evaporating, causing me to fall into her grasping hands.

"Yesss..." the word hissed, tickling my ear and sending shivers down my spine. Her voice seemed to take on a new, hard quality, a grating that scraped through my ears as she cackled, pointing her face to the heavens. "It has heard me! And now I can join Its legions! A new Emma will come, one that will tear the hearts of man, one that will wreak havoc for her master's will!"

The hands, once small and delicate, came sharp around my face, cutting deep into the skin of my cheeks. The pain sliced through my haze, and my lips opened in a weak gasp.

"And as for you....darling," the voice sneered the endearment, malice dripping with every syllable. "You and your friends will join your poor Derin - suffering through the pain of our eternal hell, moaning through the agony of our wretched prison. Dear, naive, little Emma...thank you for the death you have kept me in. I will make sure you repay every second in full!"

Searing heat exploded in my body and, looking down, I let out strangled gasp as I found her hand buried inside my chest - yet not drawing any blood. A tug vibrated through my body, and my heart accelerated as I fought to gain control of my limbs. Another tug, this time pulling deeper in my being. I could feel myself slipping out, detaching from the body I owned. Oh God, oh God, oh God!

Help! Anyone, please help me!! my conscience cried.

Then, in the corner of my vision, I spotted the most beautiful thing in the world. Three petals of light, floating down from above and resting into the grasp of my curled fingers. My petals of light, with their beautiful rays of light and love and hope. Then my heart leapt. Where the petals of light were, the Voice that had guided me must be here as well!

But just as I gained hope, the world around me began to collapse. Panicking, I cried out, willing my body to move, willing my soul to stay. A twitch convulsed through one of my arms, and I pushed it further as my heart began to soar. Just a little bit more! Come on!

A gasp echoed in the air as the other Emma looked down in shock, her ice-cold eyes landing on the sight of my hand gripping her intruding arm. Fury poured out upon her face, twisting the perfect features into a hideous scowl. She glared at me with the intensity of daggers, emitting a laugh filled with loathing, its teetering and thundering quality giving to the edges of insanity.

"You think you can stop me, Emma? What will you do? I have your body, and soon I will have your soul."

Her arm plunged forward once more, and I struggled to stop its invasion.

"I...will not...let you win," I hissed, gasping for breath.

The now shocked Emma stared back at me, watching the sweat bead down my face. But then my grip began to shake violently as my limbs weakened, and her features morphed into triumph, the tips of her mouth stretching up in horrifying glee. She leaned in, putting more weight against my trembling defense, and then in one fell swoop, plunged her claws into the depths of my soul.

I screamed. Fire sliced through my very nerves. My head seemed to drown as I struggled to keep consciousness. No. Not now. Not ever.

You must deny yourself.

What? My head cried in confusion and hope as I tried to process the words. The Voice was here!

Trust me.

I gasped as a familiar heavy object began to form in my hand, its cold steel pressing into my fiery skin.

It was the dagger. The Self Slayer. The blade at which I had so recently thought to kill myself with. My mind scrambled, trying to connect the dots. In desperation, I stared into the crazed eyes of my foe, seeing into the windows of my other self. Lust, greed, selfishness, wickedness, insanity...all these burned in their depths.

Deny yourself.

My soul was giving, ebbing into hers, joining in the ecstasy of her wickedness, screaming in the pleasure of her triumph. I had so little time, so little life to hold onto. What did it mean?

Then suddenly, I realized it:

I was her. I had always been her, and she had always been me. All the years of my life, since the beginning of time, she had been thriving inside of me. Inside of all of us.

My whole body burned, the soul within crying out for me to stop as it realized what I had chosen. I raised the Self Slayer blade, watching as it lengthened its steel into a lethal sword. The petals of light merged with the tip, causing a golden gleam to cast off of its reflection, and as I held it in the air, I saw Emma's eyes widen in absolute, terrified horror.

Deny yourself.

The sword swooped, plunging through the perfect body and into mine, burying deep into the heart of my chest. My evil self froze, her eyes widened in paralyzed shock, her jaw unhinged in a silent gasp. Then the blade began to disintegrate, spreading a sickly gray across her flesh, transforming the perfect features into the grotesque picture of her true form. I rose to my feet, surprise washing over me as the blade slid through my body and left it unharmed.

"No."

My eyes rested upon the less-fortunate Emma and watched in horror as the sickly gray merged with her skin, making it sizzle and melt off her body. Excruciation overtook her features as her form began to shake violently, the blue eyes that had once matched mine turning black with the rest of her body. Holding her hands before her, she watched as tissue and bone dripped away like candle wax, falling to the ground in a black puddle of liquid. Utter shock and horror emanated from those ebony eyes, and as her lips opened, tar oozed from her mouth like blood.

"Ah..."

The note escaped from her mouth in an embodiment of crazed disbelief. Her head dropped, taking in the sight of her body melting away into the ground. The lumps that used to be her arms trembled violently. Then, as her stomach and chest began to separate into undefinable mass, the mutilated goddess threw back her head and faced the bloody sky above. She gasped, taking in what was to be the last breath in her lungs and, through the hole of her deformed face, screamed.

The long, strangled cry echoed through the land of her warped world, shaking the trees and their ghostly figures as they watched their queen disintegrate. I was paralyzed, watching myself melt into a pool of worthlessness, of shame, of corruption. Then, there was silence.

Just when I was on the edge of recovering, my eyes spotted something wriggling inside the black liquid, and I watched in horror as a small boa constrictor slithered out of the dark pool and out into the vines of the garden. Confusion spun inside my brain. Did this mean she was still alive? Was the snake apart of her? Desperately, I reached out, trying find security in the one thing I knew to be safe.

Taking a breath, I spoke out to the Giver of Light. "W-what happened?"

You will learn in time.

I paused, my confusion only heightening. "...Any chance that time is now?"

A chuckle swept pleasantly through my mind. Its deep vibrancy was a wholesome, fatherly sound, spreading warmth through my insides and filling my heart with a wondrous, beautiful contentment.

Trust in me, beloved. I will be with you, to the end of the age.

Numerous petals appeared before me, the warmth of their rays dancing around me like a flock of butterflies. The trees and vines were beginning to fade as a cocoon of petals formed around me. I lifted a hand, watching in delight as a golden ray circled around my finger and landed on the tip. But then unease washed over me.

"Am I...going back now?"

Yes, beloved.

"But what if I'm not ready? What if I fail again? Derin is lost, somewhere, and I know I need to get him back - but what if I can't? There is so much I don't know..." I stopped, my eyes misty.

I am with you. Always.

"Even when I go back to the world?"

Even then. Seek, and you will find me.

A slow smile formed on my lips, and I turned, watching as the light conquered the scarlet black earth. Then, as the golden rays swept over me, I closed my eyes, taking in every glorious sensation of the Voice's presence.

"Thank you," I whispered, my heart filling with joy. "I will never forget this - or you."

And I never did.

Time seemed to slow as I cherished that moment, that feeling of beautiful contentment, that warmth of inexplicable joy. Then the light enveloped me, and I was gone.

___________________________________

I have treasured every moment in writing this - and now, before my eyes, I find we have only one more chapter left! :O :/

But before you dive into the final thriller ;) .....

VOTE

COMMENT

SHARE

Thank you so much again for those who have come through this journey with me XD

<3 Ruth