❝Life gave me some lemons so I made some lemonade
Soda pop, soda pop, baby, here I come
Straight to number one❞

Walking into a room filled with suited-up men always made me weak in the knees. And not in a good way my characters usually experienced but in the very real way most women did living in a corporate world dominated by men.

I felt like I was going to throw up. Or throw hands. Or both.

The email HR had sent to me yesterday had intimated me of an urgent meeting requested with regard to some 'concerns' they had about my work. What concerns these were, I could not even begin to fathom.

I had spent the better part of last night pouring over the company's code of conduct and wracking my brain on how I could have violated any of the rules. I'd gotten zilch.

Evan had interrogated me, asking if I'd had any 'sexual feelings' or otherwise about any of my colleagues that had somehow slipped into public knowledge. The company had a very strict no-workplace romance policy. But fortunately for me, and unfortunately for my overall relationship status, that never happened in real life. At least not for me.

I was going into this meeting blind and the judgemental tone in the air upon entering and walking over to the long table gave me a feeling I'd be leaving it with my vision just as compromised. But whatever this was, I wouldn't show visible weakness.

Giving the three suits seated there a polite smile, I sunk down into the chair waiting for me at the far end of the oval table. It was farther away from them than necessary—the HR rep on the 'case', the Legal associate, and my direct manager. But none of them asked me to come closer, as if my proximity to the door was warranted.

"Gentleman," I said, nodding my head to acknowledge them.

Be. Cool.

"So what is this about?"

Robin smiled at that, the only person here who knew my work ethic well enough to appreciate it. I never beat around the bush. But the one ally in my corner (or so I presumed) wasn't the one to speak.

The suit from Legal cleared his throat. I recognized his face but couldn't remember the name. By the look of sheer discomfort in his eyes, I thought it wouldn't be a problem.

"We've had a concerning allegation brought up about you, Ms. Collins."

My hands on my lap tightened.

"Oh?"

I frowned, letting my confusion show.

"An allegation?"

"That you've been using company property to build a side income of yours."

My frown deepened. Last week, someone had been fired from another division for soliciting a client's information ahead of their resignation, perhaps to funnel the client for themselves. Were they investigating many teams because of this?

"Is this related to what happened with Simmonds?" I asked, my eyebrows crunching together. "I can assure you neither I, nor anyone else in my team that I directly supervise, has been siphoning off client information."

I chanced a glance at Robin who remained tight-lipped but he gave me a subtle shake of the head, leaving me puzzled even more.

"This has nothing to do with that incident," the HR rep spoke up. "Rather, it's about your...private gigs."

All three men flushed while I stared in utter bafflement.

"Could you be more specific?"

Wordlessly, Legal-Suit stood up and walked over to me, his face getting redder with every step he took in my direction. Opening a file, he drew out some papers and laid them out on the table.

With the morbidity of an investigating officer on a serial killer case, he said, "Is this your work, Ms. Collins?"

I leaned in and picked up the sheet closest to me. My confusion vanished, stomach dropping as I read the words on the page.

Lady Alice looked longingly at the back of Charlotte's neck. Her skin was so soft, flushed red from the heat of the day as they walked around in the garden. Charlotte's hair was pulled up into an effortless bun, leaving her neck and shoulders bare for the world to see. A single drop of sweat rolled down. For a second, Lady Alice wondered what it would taste like at the tip of her tongue—like nectar perhaps. She shook her head. No. She mustn't.

"Um..."

"And this?"

Another page was shoved under my gaze. This one was more telling.

He watched her like a man enchanted by a goddess as she moved above him, throwing her head back with a face painted in love and lust. He thrust inside her as she moved down, mirroring her rhythm in an effortless dance. It was their first time and yet, Samael had felt he'd known her body for an entire lifetime. If he hadn't before, he intended to now. By the time he was done with her, she'd feel him inside of her for centuries.

The heat crept up onto my face. My eyes skipped to the other pages and I blushed further. All of them contained extracts from different stories I'd written, and different characters I'd brought to life. A secret I'd guarded my entire life laid bare before my eyes by the people I'd last expected would ever discover them.

"How did you get this?" I croaked, not thinking.

"So you don't deny this is your work? That you are this..." he looked down at the page. "ErosInk?"

Robin sucked in a breath across the table, waiting for me to confirm Legal-Suit's question.

"I don't," I responded.

All men flinched. I felt the redness creep up my neck and chest now like a suffocating vine, tinging me first in visible embarrassment and shame before a fiery hot anger took its place.

"Why should I?" I said, voice raising both in volume and pitch. "It's not like I'm selling feet pics on the Internet. And even if I was, there's nothing wrong with that!"

"Ms. Collins, what you do with your own time is none of our concern," HR-Suit boomed loudly, sounding insulted by my insinuation. "We are a fair, equal-opportunity employer and we don't judge the sexual orientation or identities of any of our staff."

"Then why am I being interrogated for my private life right now? How does that have anything to do with the company's code of conduct?"

"You are being questioned about whether or not you engaged in your side pursuits with company property."

They were fucking kidding me.

"Define with 'company property.' If you're talking about your computer systems, I can 100% assure you I have never used FinTrix's company-given laptop or my cubicle's desktop to write my stories."

He opened his mouth to say something further but I barraged on, my irritation growing.

"Nor have I written my work during actual work hours. At most, I may have dabbled in a bit of it on my own phone or personal laptop during lunch breaks. But if you're penalizing me for that, you should also be condemning all the staff that check their social media or send intimate texts to their significant others in their break times."

HR-Suit flushed. Legal-Suit gulped. My manager smiled, mildly impressed.

"Well that's a relief," Robin spoke up, finally. "We received an anonymous complaint that you were using company hours and equipment to..."

He didn't finish the sentence, blushing.

"Robin, you more than anyone know the quality of my work. I've single-handedly managed the team, helped improve our bottom line, and raised the department's morale, even with everything that's been going on."

I threw a scathing glare at the HR-Suit. He had the decency to look a little ashamed, knowing exactly what I was insinuating.

"And judging by the salary updates sent out yesterday, you've only made my job that much harder. A job I do very well and have always delivered on without complaints."

This interrogation a day after the blow they'd delivered regarding my pay was just an added insult. My eyes flashed to the papers the Legal rep had displayed in front of me. How had they even gotten these? It was a total, unnecessary invasion of privacy.

"Is there anything else you'd like to clarify with me?" I asked with a tone of finality, not hiding my irritation.

"I think that's all—"

Robin's words were interrupted by the Legal-Suit clearing his throat again. He exchanged a glance with his HR buddy before turning to face me and sparing me the view of his peanut-shaped head.

"Ms. Collins, you'll have to understand that as much as we value your hard work and tenure at FinTrix, we can't just take your words at face value. We'll have the Audit and Tech team work together to conduct an investigation over your digital trail on company systems."

He hesitated for a moment, melting under my glower, then added, "This is just standard procedure. You have nothing to worry about if what you've said is true."

"Fine," I hissed, my voice icy.

Assuming that to be the last of it, I stood up to leave. But they weren't done with me.

"There is one more thing."

I made no move to sit back down, standing still at the end of the table with my arms crossed. A whole twenty seconds went by in an awkward silence before Legal-Suit continued.

"We will need you to sign an agreement to discontinue your writing as ErosInk while you're working here."

Someone gasped loudly, scandalized by what was being said. And it wasn't me. To my surprise, I looked over at my manager who had stood up from his own seats, hands slammed down on the table and looking infuriated on my behalf.

"That's preposterous, Devin."

"But necessary."

I opened my mouth to ask if this was a joke but Robin wasn't quite done.

"It's bullshit is what it is."

My mouth fell open. As did everyone else's.

Robin straightened his back, bringing a hand to his temples as he shut his eyes momentarily to regain his composure.

"Listen guys," he continued in a more hushed tone, addressing the other two like I wasn't still in the room. "I'm saying this off the record. Harper is one of the best assets this company has right now. She might be young but she's more motivated and has got a hell of a lot done in her time here compared to some of the bigwigs in Accounting, myself included even. Her growth has been spectacular."

"We're not doubting that, Rob," HR-Suit spoke up, throwing me a curious glance as if he couldn't believe his ears. "But there's a perfectly sound reason why Devin's proposing this."

"What might that be, pray tell?" I spoke up.

Legal-Suit, aka Devin, looked in my direction. His ears were pink in nervousness. Whatever he was about to say, I knew I wouldn't like it.

"This ErosInk persona of yours is practically famous. You have a huge subscriber base," he said then paused for a second, continuing in a softer tone, "which I'm sure is no small feat. But—"

"Give it to me straight Devin," I said, irritated by his obvious attempts to butter me up.

"...but," he continued, "if word got out that the illusive ErosInk is none other than an employee of FinTrix, it would be...problematic to say the least."

I couldn't believe my ears.

"You think the world would care what a small-time employee does in her free time?"

"No," HR-Suit answered for him, firm and resilient in his tone. "The world doesn't care what you do, Ms. Collins. But it does care about FinTrix. We'd have a PR scandal on our hands if we got associated with a famous anonymous erotica writer online."

I could feel my tongue drying inside my mouth and whatever fight I had left inside me died. The entire situation was beyond ridiculous but I could tell from the looks in both the Legal and HR reps' eyes that they'd made their decision.

"So this is an ultimatum," I said, solemn. "I either stop writing as ErosInk and stay with FinTrix, or I have to quit."

"When you put it like that..."

I glared at Legal-Suit and he backtracked his attempts to salvage the severity of the situation.

"Yes, I suppose that's what this is," he surrendered.

My eyes dropped to the table, to the pages of my work spread across it like some kind of incriminating evidence of crime. Never mind the how, the what, and the whys of this situation. The fact of the matter was that I was being punished for my love of writing. No...I was being punished for my love of exploring sexuality and temptation through my writing. Had it been some testosterone-fuelled action stories, this wouldn't have been a problem.

Everything about this was unfair.

My silence spoke volumes as my shoulder sunk down. I bowed my head to keep them from seeing me tear up. To my dismay, Robin had noticed.

"Why don't we all take some time to sleep on this? Surely, there's another way around this situation that can be worked out."

"No. There's no need for that."

My voice came out shaky but everyone's eyes flew to my face, hanging onto my words. I closed my eyes, feeling two tear drops trail down my cheeks and plop onto the rich carpeted floor. That was all I was willing to shed over this.

Opening my eyes, I looked up and fixed them all with a resolute smile. I didn't recognize my own voice as I spoke next, the warmth in them emptied out and gave way to a tone so robotic that I could taste the metal come off my tongue.

"FinTrix marked the start of my career in Accounting and I'll never forget the experiences I've had in this company. I'll forever be grateful to Robin," I gestured at my manager, almost wavering at the panic rising in his eyes, "for mentoring me and shaping my future here."

"Wait, Harper, don't be hasty—"

"But I can't work for a company that asks me to choose between making a living at it and an unrelated, personal passion of mine that fuels my life outside of these four walls. I'm allowed to be my own person and have my own creative pursuits, no matter how 'indecent' they may come across to some lesser evolved minds."

My gaze hovered over the other two men in the room who both flushed, my insults hitting them just as I intended them to.

"Therefore," I sucked in a breath, taking a moment to process the way my heart rammed against my rib cage as if it were trying to beat hard enough, fast enough to stop me from making a mistake.

But this was no mistake. This was a necessity.

Harper Mae Collins was not a sell-out.

Letting my breath out, I rolled back my shoulders and lifted my chin up, staring the HR rep right into his beady little eyes.

"I quit." 

_____

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