SURPRISE! I'm back. I didn't do anything from my uni so I could write this. I feel high from my meds and I'm very much pretending my parents are coming to check on me every half-hour in fear I died or something lol.

For now, we are still in the romantic-teenage phase of the story, but we are getting to the political plot again, so PREPARE for the next few chapters.

This is slightly fluffy with some comedy.

Regulus was a gentleman, and a gentleman doesn't kiss and tell.

But it wasn't hard for Evan Rosier and Barty Crouch Jr. to guess what had happened when he didn't come back to the dormitory that night without prior warning, and it was even clearer when Pandora appeared alone with the other girls the next morning to eat some breakfast. They were sure of what had happened.

Evan grinned. "Oh, look at that smirk of his, Barty. All macho, isn't he?" he mumbled.

Barty chuckled, fixing his own hair with his fingers.

The Great Hall continued buzzing with the usual morning energy with all the tables filled with toasts, eggs, tea and coffee, their scent wafting through the air and making Luna raised her chin a bit, taking a deep breath in before whispering something over at Regulus and squeezing his hand before gliding off towards the Ravenclaw table.

Regulus dropped into his usual seat across from Evan and Barty, noticing how the two were watching his demeanour.

"Alright, what the happened? Who hexed you?" Evan asked, leaning across the table to hear Regulus' answer better. "You look like someone slipped Amortentia into your morning tea, but you didn't have your morning tea yet."

"I'm normal," Regulus replied smoothly.

He reached for a piece of toast and put it on his plate, buttering it before taking a deliberately slow bite, ignoring how the two were watching him.

"You aren't normal," Barty said, shaking his head a bit, gaze narrowing. "Why are you looking all chipper? Did Slughorn's friends decided to name a Potion after you or did someone find a way for you not having to study Law after Hogwarts?"

Regulus rolled his eyes and didn't reply, just filling his cup with tea and putting honey into it. His calm mask was slipping back into place, all his happiness and warmth disappearing. Still, his friends were far too close to him to know when he was Occluding.

Evan clutched his chest, dramatically falling back against the wall behind him, resting his back against it.

"Oh, Merlin. He's got that look! Regulus either found the meaning of life and made it worth living... or maybe he just had a night that made life worth living," Evan said, devilish smirk appearing in his face.

Regulus' shoulders tensed up slightly, but the tip of his ears blushed a bit.

"Oh, no way!" Barty said so loudly that they earned a few curious looks from nearby students. Barty blushed as well and leaned in to lower his voice into a loud whisper. "You did it, didn't you?"

"I don't know what you're talking about," Regulus dismissed, pretending to be disinterested.

"Yes, you do!" Evan said, shaking his head, tugging at Regulus' sleeve to make him put his food down on the plate and pay attention to what he had to say. "Come on, Regulus, we're your best mates. You can't just sit there with that smug look of your and not tell us what happened!"

"Yes, I can," Regulus said, looking away.

Evan slapped Barty's arm.

"See?! Something did happen!" Evan said.

Barty smiled when Regulus scoffed.

"Luna was glowing when she walked in, by the way, almost as much as you. You two were together the whole night, weren't you? Where? – Astronomy Tower? Dungeons? Behing the greenhouses? Where?!"

"Don't be ridiculous," Regulus said cooly, but his flush grew. "I'm not discussing this."

Evan's grin grew wicked.

"You don't have to say anything, your face is doing all the talking by itself," Evan dismissed Regulus' embarrassment, turning to Barty and giving him a proud, triumphant look. "He totally did it."

Regulus hissed. "Evan!"

"What? You did! And I'm happy for you!" he said, raising his hands in mock surrender. He leaned forwards to clasp Regulus' shoulder once. "I'm not going to lie, when you went to that inn with her and came back saying that you had not lost your virginity, I really started thinking you'd die a virgin. All that pure-blood decorum, but no pure-blood action –"

"Evan!" Regulus hissed again, glancing around to make sure nobody was listening to them.

Barty's laugh was so much louder than his usual that people around smiled, unsure of what they were talking about, but surprised by Barty's reaction.

"Merlin's beard," Barty said, covering his mouth with his hand in shock. He put his hands on the table gain. "You actually went all the way! Regulus Arcturus Black, the most uptight, brooding bloke in all of Hogwarts finally –"

"Enough, the both of you!" Regulus snapped, but his voice cracked.

Evan and Barty laughter grew louder. Regulus glared at them, dignity crumbling to the ground as he blushed.

"Oh, this is the best Christmas gift I could've asked for," Evan said, wiping away the tears from his eyes.

Barty leaned towards Regulus, grin so big that his face threatened to be split in half. "So? How was it?"

"Fine."

"Did you –"

"I'm not answering," Regulus cut him off firmly.

Evan whined, lying his head on the table for a second before looking up at Regulus again.

"Oh, come on!" he said. "We're living vicariously through you here. My first time was horrible, and Barty's is a secret, because all pureblood queers are a secret, apparently. Just give us a hint here. Was it romantic? Did you plan it and didn't tell us? Did she start it? Was it awkward?"

Regulus pinched the bridge of his nose, clearly regretting his expressive face and how easily his friends could read him.

"None of your business," he said.

Barty slapped Evan's back lightly in a silent warning.

"You don't have to tell us anything," Barty said, voice gentler than Evan's. "The fact that you're even tolerating this conversation means it was amazing."

Regulus glared at Barty, but didn't deny his guess, which made both boys exchange a gleeful high-five across the table.

"This is the best day ever!" Evan declared, looking skyward. "I just can't believe it."

"Try not to be so surprised, it's quite offensive," Regulus grumbled, eating his toast again.

"Regulus Black, the dark prince of Slytherin, officially a man!" Evan continued, pretending not to hear Regulus.

"I hate you," Regulus said, lowering his head.

Barty laughed again, rolling his eyes at Regulus' dramatics.

"Oh, Merlin," Remus grumbled loudly, putting down his knife.

Remus closed his eyes, covering his face with his hands and lowering his head.

"What's happening?" James asked, leaning over with mild curiosity.

"Look at that," Sirius said, raising his eyebrows.

"What?"

"Regulus and Luna," Sirius said, nodding subtly towards the couple separating when they walked towards the table. "Don't they look dandy?" he added, looking back to his plate.

James followed his gaze, squinting for a moment behind his glasses. He watched them for a moment before widening his eyes with a slow grin spreading across his face. "No way," he whispered.

"Do you think –?" Remus asked, voice low, too scared to look up.

"I know," Sirius said, sounding somewhat resigned.

Remus made a loud, disgusted noise.

James, being James, seemed to find it all rather too amusing, smiling to himself as he watched his friends.

"I mean..." James shrugged. "Good for them?"

"Not good for them! That's my little sister, James!" Remus hissed, leaning over the table to scold his friend.

"Fair point," James whispered, trying to look solemn, but his grin came back soon after. "But still, they're together. It was bound to happen eventually, right?"

Remus groaned and looked up from his hands. Across from Remus, he watched and understood why he was so quiet; Sirius was unusually quiet, eating his food calmly and drinking his tea while looking over at Marlene, who was waving at him as she sat – she had just gotten there, looking very sleepy and hair still messy.

Remus narrowed his eyes.

James cleared his throat, trying to move Remus' suspicions.

"You alright there, Pads?" James asked.

Sirius shrugged.

"Why wouldn't I be?" he asked, voice lower than his usual. "My brother's dating her. That's fine... they're fine."

Remus gave him a flat look. "Oh, is it? After everything?"

"I'm aware of 'everything' you're talking about, Moony," Sirius said through gritted teeth. "I don't need the reminder."

A loud clattering noise made them look to the side, watching as Peter excused himself over his shoulder to the person that he made drop the goblet. He ran over to his friends, jumping to sit besides James, using his friend's shoulder to sit in place.

"Did you hear? Did you hear?" Peter asked, eyes wide with gossipy delight and panting after running. "My friend from Hufflepuff said that they left Slughorn's party early last night. Together. You didn't tell us James!"

Sirius turning to Peter. Remus shot Peter a withering look.

"Yes, very helpful, Wormtail. Thanks," Remus said.

"What?" Peter asked, defensively. "It's true. People saw them, and now they came in together. Someone heard Marta saying that Luna didn't come back to the dormitory last night. It's the whole talk at Slytherin table."

"And you heard that at Hufflepuff?" James asked, raising his eyebrows.

"Oh, no. I heard that on my way to the restroom. My friend just said they walked out earlier," he explained.

Remus looked over at the Slytherin table, watching Barty and Evan practically falling over themselves laughing while Regulus tried (and failed) to maintain his composure, though he blushed and grinned to himself.

James rolled his eyes. "Come on, Moony, you remember how it was when it was your turn to celebrate."

Remus scowled.

"That's different."

"Is it, though?" James asked, raising a single eyebrow. "I seem to recall a lot a back-slapping from me, some singing from Sirius – and I'm quite certain Peter made you a drawing with fireworks in the window near our common room. Regulus' friends seem to be a lot more discreet than us."

"Oh, shut up," Remus muttered, ears turning pink.

Across the table, Sirius took a deep breath before sighing, still grappling with his emotions.

"Fine. I'll admit it," he announced a bit louder than his friends' tones. "Part of me is... proud of Reggie. He's finally doing something almost normal for his age without his mother over his shoulder. But the rest of me is just... no," he said, waving his hands vaguely.

"No?" Peter asked.

"That's specific," James grumbled.

"Yeah, Worm. No. I'm his brother, and it's weird – even weirder because it's Luna. I was fine when it was puppy love, you know? A whole lot of handholding and whispering to each other in the corridors. I was fine with that. I could look away from that. But this is just... too much."

Before anyone could respond, Lily Evan – who had been sitting nearby with Marlene, who was too hungover to talk – decided to interject. "You lot are ridiculous," she said, tone clipped. "It's none of your business!"

"She's my sister," Remus said, turning to look at her.

"And? She's not your fucking wife, Remus. She's her own person and she can do whatever she wants as long as she's doing it safely. You don't get to police her life."

"It's not about policing –"

"It is, a little," James interrupted, nodding his head.

Remus glared at him.

"You're not helping."

"I wasn't trying to," James said as cheerfully as ever with a shrug.

Lily turned to Sirius, giving him attention. "And you? You went out with her for a while. So what? Are you going to hold it over her head forever?"

"I'm not holding anything over her head! I'm just saying that Regulus is... complicated. This whole relationship is complicated."

"It's not complicated. They love each other and they like spending time together. You are making this complicated," Lily said firmly.

Though Lily was the smartest person that all those boys knew, she clearly wasn't aware of how terribly wrong she was at that point. Still, none of them said anything.

Yet, though they had been scolded perfectly well by Lily, Remus brooded the whole day, sitting in the Common Room in his free time and ignoring the other students there, sitting in the far corner with a textbook open in hi slap, but no homework done at all. Sirius was the first to notice his foul moon.

"What's with the long face, Moony?" Sirius asked, plopping himself down at the chair in front of his friend/boyfriend. "You look like someone just told you chocolate was banned or something."

Remus sighed. "Not now."

"What's the problem?" Sirius insisted.

"Oh, nothing much. Just my sister becoming the latest Hogwarts scandal and there are whispers about her in the corridors all the time," Remus said, crossing his arms and closing the book on his lap. He sighed. "You said that her reputation is important. They made it so obvious – too obvious."

"There's a code of silence in school, nobody talks about it to their parents about things like this," Sirius said, putting his feet over the coffee table in front of them.

He leaned forward, getting Remus' drink and sniffing it before drinking. Oh, it was good. Coffee, milk and something sweet as a finishing touch.

"For all I know there'll be a rumour about something depraved... like... like... I don't know! – Mermaid kisses or something –"

Sirius took another sip, smacking his lips. "Nah, Luna wouldn't do that. She doesn't like it," he said only half-listening.

He really liked that drink. He needed to find out its name to get more of it and –

They both sat there in stunned silence for a few beats, then Sirius finally understood what he had just said.

"What did you just say?" Remus asked, head snapping towards him.

"Nothing, love. Nothing at all, darling," Sirius answered, far too quickly.

"No, no, no," Remus said, pointing towards him with an accusatory finger at him. "You said –"

"I said nothing of importance, my love, please. Ignore me and my big mouth, please. Don't make it weird," Sirius said. "We just... well, we went out, Remus. It's really not that surprising."

"I know! But I don't need to be reminded of it, thank you," he said, voice rising slightly. "But knowing that you know whatever the hell are her preferences is just completely disgusting. Why would you say that out loud?"

"It slipped out!" Sirius said, voice going high. "It's not some sordid discussion of details, she just –"

Remus got up from his seat and, immediately, Sirius jumped off his, unsure of what could be Remus' reaction, after all they were aware of Remus' lack of control when angry. And Sirius knew he had made him angry.

"Stop talking!" he said loudly. "I can't believe this. First Regulus, now you. This day is a nightmare!"

"What's a nightmare?" James asked.

James had appeared out of nowhere, having come into the Common Room but a few seconds ago with Peter just behind him holding a bag of sweets that James had asked him to carry (after all James had been the one to pay for it).

Sirius turned, stumbling towards his best friend in some need of protection.

"James!" Sirius said, happily.

Remus jabbed a finger at Sirius, his face a mix of fury and mortification. "This one just casually informed me about my sister's preferences!" he said.

Peter raised his eyebrows, putting the bag on the coffee table, narrowing his eyes at Sirius almost hiding behind James with his face pale white. James crossed his arms, clearly dislike the predicament he was left in to mediate.

"What?" James asked.

"Mermaid kisses," Sirius whispered.

James seemed confused.

"Mermaid kisses?" Peter echoed, slightly louder. Sirius hissed to quiet him down, but Peter wasn't looking at him. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Irrelevant!" Remus snapped. Peter took two steps back, discreetly walking to stand beside Sirius behind James. "The point is: Sirius is right there, acting all casual while fucking me at night and remembering my sister's preferences at the top of his head. And I am supposed to be okay with it?!"

James exchanged a look with Sirius, clearly uncomfortable.

"Mate," James started, hesitating. "You're overthinking this."

"Am I?" Remus asked. "Would you be alright if someone mentioned Lily's proclivities in passing?"

"Oi! Leave Lily out of this," James said, all kindness disappearing and leaving him looking serious.

Peter shook his head, turning to Siris.

"What are mermaid kisses, thought? Are they... like... gillyweed related? What?" Peter asked, voice low.

"Pete, focus!" Sirius hissed.

"I am focused. This is just weird."

Remus made a choked noise.

"Gosh, now I can't unhear it. I heard it," Remus groaned to himself.

James put a hand on Remus' shoulder, squeezing it lightly.

"Alright, Moony, take a deep breath there, yeah? You'll pop a vein if you keep this up," James said, frowning in concern.

Remus shrugged his friend's hand off his shoulder and crossed his arms, looking like a petulant child.

"I don't need to calm down. I need Sirius to stop acting like – like..." Remus didn't find a good enough word.

He needed Sirius to stop remembering Luna. He needed to be the number one in Sirius' mind and know that Sirius was there whenever they were together, not slipping away into his own mind and memories. He needed to know that Sirius loved him and wanted him. Remus' heart squeezed and bled, still unable to find a good enough word.

"Like what?" James asked.

"Like it didn't matter. Like I wouldn't care," Remus said.

"It doesn't matter, and you shouldn't care," Sirius said, shaking his head.

"But I do!" Remus said. "Because I love you, and because she's my little sister. Because it bothers me that she had you, too."

James sighed, turning to the bag Peter had brought up with him and taking a bar of chocolate, opening it and biting into it in silence before offering it to Remus, who took it without even looking what he was being offered. Remus bit into it, frowning.

"One day, you'll thank me for keeping you from murdering your boyfriend or your sister, or your sister's boyfriend," James said, voice aloof.

"Oh, yeah?" Remus grumbled.

James nodded, smirking at Peter, who chuckled, knowing exactly what James was going to say. "Yep, when you have several beautiful, blue-eyed nieces and nephews running around and calling you Uncle Moony."

Remus softened ever so slightly.

He was terrified of having his own children, so he had grown used to the idea of using Luna's children as a way to fill the whole in his heart. He loved children, and he loved the idea of someone growing as kindly as Luna had done. He hoped every time that he saw Luna babysitting that she would one day have children of her own.

"You're audacious to think me able to survive this whole situation," Remus grumbled, but his bad mood was less pronounced.

"Well, not before we finish all these sweets, I hope," Peter said, holding a liquorice wand.

James chuckled, guiding Remus to sit back down and sitting beside him, between him and Sirius, who was guiding to sit back down by Peter.

"Come on, Moony. Eat up. Sweets make everything better," James said, making a vague gesture with his hand.

"Nothing will make this better," Remus muttered, but his bit into the chocolate bar in his hand again.

James grinned and nodded.

"Now, let's talk about something else. Let's talk about how I danced with Lily Evans last night," James said.

"Well, perhaps you'll survive less than me or Sirius. Lily will kill you before we die of natural causes of something," Remus said.

But the corner of his mouth was raised up and dirty with chocolate. Nobody could take him seriously.

Maybe sweets do help, after all.

EDIT: END OF BOOK TWO.