For those who need the truth...

Part 5

Once again, you found yourself in the TARDIS, but now, the machine was carrying an additional passenger.

It wasn't the first time Lise Meitner had entered the TARDIS, for she casually strolled into it with no reaction of it being scientifically impossible. Even now, she seemed to be taking charge by standing next to the Doctor, who was navigating the way to wherever you lot were heading to.

"Where're we going?" you asked first, beating the other three companions.

It felt like weeks since you found out you were dying, and if you hadn't already, you were dying for answers. The plan that the Doctor was formulating should be complete by now.

The Doctor looked at you while turning a handle in a clockwise motion before realising she was spinning it the wrong way. She quickly corrected herself before answering, "Sorry, I don't drive well while talking. You know what they say, don't drink and drive!"

"Doctor, you're not drinking."

"Same thing, Graham. Besides, bit of a long story."

Ryan's impatience was equal to yours, "Doctor, I think we've had enough stories. We need the plan now if we're going to save (Y/N) and end this once and for all."

Pulling a plug from the console, the Doctor waved the smoke that was now being choked up from the hole where the plug once rested. Through the noise that the engine was making, the Doctor shouted, "Professor! Do you mind explaining while I keep us going?"

You could tell Meitner was trying her best not to look surprised.

"Explain what exactly?"

"What happened last time, and the plan! Should be the same!" the Doctor said, "Oh! Don't forgot to include the detail where everyone lives!"

She composed herself really well as she agreed and gathered the rest of you to a quieter corner of the console room. Giving you a sympathetic look, she said, "You're very brave, just like Hahn. Marching into battle with that smile of yours."

Confused, you thanked her and continued to wear that smile, because you didn't even know what you were getting yourself into.

"These Spirits have chased after Hahn for a while," Meitner explained as the rest of you listened attentively, "but because of the war, Hahn was able to move from place to place, not only to escape the chaos, but also to evade these creatures. They took the form of a homeless man. At first he thought nothing of it, but when he crossed country borders and found the man close by every time, he grew suspicious. The day we discovered the isotope of protactinium was the day that man chose to attack."

She paused and gestured to the Doctor, "It was also a very lucky day. She turned up right at our doorstep, a strange device in hand, and made the homeless man unconscious. We tied him up and the Doctor wanted to question him, but the Spirit hogging onto him left its shell and headed straight for Hahn."

"Then what happened?" asked Yaz as Meitner had gone silent for a while. From her facial expressions, she seemed to be replaying the events that had happened that day. The horror in her eyes made your blood run cold.

"Hahn was holding on to a piece of the isotope, not directly of course. It all happened too fast, Hahn held it in front of him as a shield and the creature...it was like a ghost. It zoomed right at him and started to...to take over him."

"Reminder, nobody died."

The Doctor suddenly appeared between you and Graham, causing the two of you to jump. She was so sneaky, you didn't even hear her. Why wasn't she called the Ninja instead?

"Lise," the Doctor said calmly with an encouraging smile on her face, "Go on."

Meitner let out a shaky breath as she rubbed her eye, "It...it almost took him entirely. The life in him was being forced out, but then the protactinium, somehow, it latched onto the Spirit. He almost died...he almost died right in front of me, he..."

"He is still alive," the Doctor continued for Meitner, who could no longer resist the tears building up in her eyes, "My theory is that the Spirit possesses things with a longer life. Fun fact, did you know protactinium-231 has the longest lifespan out of all its isotopes?"

"How long exactly?" Ryan asked out of curiosity as he tried to comfort Meitner along with Yaz.

"Its half-life is 32,760 years, much much longer than (Y/N)'s lifespan," said the Doctor, "No offence, but human lifespans aren't really that long."

"None taken," you replied, "I've already lived longer than I expected."

"Good for you!" The Doctor exclaimed, continuing her theory, "Also, it's known that Spirits latch onto living things, but protactinium isn't exactly living, so I'm guessing it's because of other properties that haven't been discovered yet, but well, no one lives long enough to find out."

"So is it safe to assume the Spirit that was supposed to get Hahn instead got that protect-thing?"

"Yep!" the Doctor snapped her fingers, "Protactinium is our safest bet to save (Y/N). Once we got it absorbed, I'll just throw it into a supernova! That's it for the Spirits. Did it once, I can do it again."

You felt a feeling of joy rush through you. If all you had to do was hold a piece of protactinium and let the Spirit latch on to it, you'd be saved!

"Hold on," you said, hoping to get the plan going already, "Where do we get protactinium?"

"You best don't make us time travel back to get it from Hahn's hands," Graham said as he leaned against one of the structures in the TARDIS with his arms folded. You could see Ryan nodding in agreement.

A wide grin was plastered on the Doctor's face, "We don't need to. I've some in the TARDIS for research purposes. Also for convenience and time-saving, take your pick. Meitner gave me the remaining she didn't need."

It was your turn to smile. Saving you was going to be so easy! The plan was so simple, yet you couldn't help but wonder, why was Meitner crying?

You turned to look, but she no longer was. Instead, she was walking up to you, a forced smile on her face. Taking your hand, she repeated something she had said earlier, "You're very, very brave."

Unable to hold back, you blurted out, "Why were you upset earlier? Isn't Hahn alive?"

She didn't let go of your hands, "He is, but he's different."

"Meitner..."

"No Doctor," Meitner asserted, "I have to tell her, all of them," she looked at the rest of the group, "They have to understand."

Yaz, Ryan and Graham stared at the Doctor in shock and a hint of betrayal. In a strangely calm voice, Graham asked, "How many more secrets are you going to hide from us, Doc?"

It was one of the rare moments when she could not answer his question. To fill the silence, Meitner worked up the courage to tell you what the Doctor couldn't.

"He was unconscious for months, the Doctor took him here to recuperate and recover. I travelled with him - sorry, her - for awhile, waiting for him to wake up. It was...it was horrible. Sometimes, he would laugh, but then he started screaming in his sleep and there was nothing I could do about it. The Doctor supposed it was due to his life slowly coming back to him, she said when the Spirit almost took over, his soul shattered into pieces. They were fitting back together, but that meant relieving his life all over again. In his mind, he was going through everything he did in his life. We came back to the time we left a month after he woke up, but it was as though a piece of him was missing. Suppose he was a ceramic vase. You break it, and the pieces go everywhere, and no matter how hard you try to put it back together, you just can't. There'd bound to be the tiny pieces that can never be found or replaced."

The happiness in you was drained out as the story unfolded. It wasn't that simple after all.

"Thank you for telling me this," you said quietly as you threw a glare at the Doctor. From the clinic till now, she was bringing your hopes up until it peaked, but it was false hope. Nothing was ever going to be easy in life, how could you possibly think that saving your life was?

Finally, the Doctor opened her mouth to speak, "(Y/N), I'm sorry for not telling you this, but it's the only way. The gang and I have been chasing this Spirit for weeks and we've seen it take life after life after life because we were always too late. Our last chance lies with you, but it's your choice."

What was there even to choose? Sure, the procedure was easy, your life would be saved, but you would never be the same again. It would be like a scar that would haunt you forever, except you're the only one who can't see it. You'd be gone from your family for a while, but they wouldn't notice. Besides, you wouldn't even realise you're gone because you'll be stuck in your own world for months. You'll just grow a few months older, that's all. You wouldn't have to keep running all your life. All you had to do was face your own demons.

It would not be easy, but life after that would be promising, because you'll still have a life to live.

You started studying the looks on all their faces. Meitner was scared, her face pale. Graham had a solemn look on his, perhaps a mix of anger and concern. Ryan's was similar, except you could tell he was slightly confused. Yaz was looking around as well, trying to make sense of the group's emotions. And the Doctor was staring right into your eyes, awaiting your answer.

With your heart beating loudly in your ears, you gave it to her.

"Let's do it."