CHAPTER THIRTY SEVEN,
the mall

THE HOUSE THE group was temporarily staying at would've been completely silent if it weren't for the low murmurs of the old settlement.

Each creak and each hum put the survivors on edge and made it hard for anyone to get sleep, especially Daryl Dixon. He sat at the dining chair with his crossbow on the table as the others slept, his eyes staring forward and his mind elsewhere as he thought.

He liked the silence and the solitude when it comes to his shift, it gave him time to think - to reminisce.

The bitter winter had been brutal. Warmth had become a hard source to find and the lack of supplies was almost a daily thing, but luckily the bitter cold slowed down the walkers which made it a little bit easier for them. It wasn't a season of just surviving, but a season of grief too.

A sound of footsteps brought Daryl back to reality and he glanced at the entrance way to the dining room.

He saw the sheriffs hat before he saw him.

With tired, blue eyes and a gun holstered on his belt, Carl Grimes looked at Daryl with curiosity. "Hi."

The redneck was quiet, but the boy didn't take it to heart. He watched as he sat down at the dining chair across from him, the tip of his large sheriff's hat almost concealing his face.

Daryl was never really good with children, but Carl wasn't just a child. He was a kid forced to mature in the midst of a ruthless world.

In a way, he could relate to him. His childhood had been snatched up and his metamorphosis to adulthood had been quick.

"Do you ever sleep?" Carl asked.

"Nah."

"I keep thinking about the baby, and...everything else," The boy admitted, looking at his lap. He lifted up his head after a moment. "Was Merle a good brother?"

Daryl met his gaze, the name of his lost older brother making him pause for a moment.

Merle was his biggest influence growing up. The two had shared similar beliefs, both having walked through hell and coming back with only a few scars, but that was then. Daryl loved his brother, yet he still acknowledged resentment layered that love too. "I'm sure you'll be a great big brother." He assured.

Carl smiled faintly. "Shane said the same thing to me once," Daryl watched as his eyes averted to his lap again, as if saying his name was forbidden. It was Rick's doing, but the redneck couldn't blame him.

He knew that the late Shane Walsh brought grief to the whole Grimes family.

Rick never showed it, but Daryl wasn't stupid. He saw it in his eyes, especially whenever he looked at Lori and her growing belly.

That was his brother, and they went against each other many times, but having your brothers blood on your hands is something you simply can't get over.

"Dad doesn't like talking about him, but I miss him," Carl paused for a moment, sadness taking over his expression. "I miss her."

The little sheriff didn't have to say her name for Daryl to know.

The mere mention of her brought a curse of heaviness and things that haven't been done. The guilt came crashing through, Daryl's face becoming hard and his eyes becoming narrowed, a reaction that been created when he didn't want to speak about it, but he knew Carl wouldn't understand why.

For the first few days after the farm, Daryl had half expected for her to find them, to show up smiling, looking at him and saying, "Thought you could get rid of me, huh?"

But she never did.

He had gotten used to it, but sometimes her absence didn't feel real. He was so used to her always being there, always gazing up at him with that little look she always gave him.

As the days turned into weeks, and weeks turned into months, he tried to stop thinking about her, stopped trying to find out what happened to her, stopped blaming himself for something he could've changed.

Maybe it was because he wasn't fond of emotions, Daryl always having the bad habit of bottling them up and placing them on the tallest shelf - but there was always a prayer in him, a prayer that was left unsaid on his lips that she was still somewhere out there and alive. Maybe one day she would find them, all the details of her green eyes still there.

"Maybe Nate is with her and protecting her." Carl said hopefully.

"Or maybe it's the other way 'round." Daryl retorted. Carl looked at him and laughed, the somber mood dying out like a campfire after a long night.

"Do you miss her?"

Daryl glanced at him before looking away, shifting in his seat awkwardly. He never answered him, but the ache in his chest did;

Yes.

━━━━━

The smell of eggs and pancakes brought back memories of sunny mornings and the smell of coffee brewing. It was nothing but a sense of depression to the ebony haired beauty, because not even a year ago the world had been normal. Sure, it wasn't perfect but it beat the one shes in now.

The world now was just one big unmarked grave.

The Governor sat the plate down, and Samantha gazed down at it with an insatiable hunger."Seven months in the wild," He commented. "You must be starving,"

She was, even if she had ate the day before. As much as Samantha wanted to leave, she couldn't deny that she enjoyed Woodbury. The last day two days have been put her nerves slightly at easy, but at night it was worse. The nightmares were terrible, but she didn't scream anymore, as if her brain had decided to show some kindness. But despite all of this, Samantha still slept better than she did when she was outside.

"Woodbury," Nathan started with a mouth full of food. "I thought I'd never come across a stable community ever again."

"Well, Rome wasn't built in one day." The Governor chuckled.

But it burned in one.

"So, I heard you were in the Army?" Million asked, pushing his round glasses up to the bridge of his nose. He had a soft voice, showing curiosity and intelligence to them and the new world around him.

Nathan swallowed his food. "As soon as I hit seventeen, I ran off to join."

"For how long?" The Governor questioned.

"Almost six years."

"Impressive," The leader murmured. "Skills are needed like that during times like these."

Samantha took a sip of water, the coldness making her thirst quiver.

"What about you?"

She could see the Governor's eyes were on her, and for some reason it made her want to squirm. "College," Samantha answered. "I was studying psychology, probably was going to end up being a clinical or forensic."

Milton's interest was peaked. "You like to study the mind?" He asked, a hint of excitement lacing his words.

The brunette smiled. "I wanted to understand it," The taste of the eggs made her bite back a moan. "The human mind is so complexed, it can be a beautiful servant but-"

"A dangerous master." Milton finished, faintly smiling.

"I think I'm starting to like you." Samantha chuckled, gesturing her fork at him.

The Governor looked pleased at their interaction.
"People need that kind of help," He spoke. "We have gone through so much trauma. You can help them with that."

Samantha knew what he was trying to do. "I don't-"

"And you," He was looking at Nathan now. "Your skills and experience in the military can be a great asset. If you can take down two of my strongest men, imagine what else you're capable of."

Nathan was in thought at his words, eating each and every one of them up, but then he glanced at his best friend. Samantha had a frown plastered on her face, hesitation clear there that seemed to infect him too.

All his choices seemed to be revolved around her these days.

"I'm thankful for all that you've done, but-" Before he could finish, there was a knock at the door and James entered the room. An awkward smile twitched his lips when he felt all the eyes look at him, before turning to the leader with an abrupt look of seriousness.

"Crowley got sick," James stated. "We need an extra man on the trip, Governor."

The leader's eyebrows rose. "Four isn't enough?"

"We need enough people to search the whole mall."

"Which mall?" Samantha asked curiously, her voice causing them to turn to look at her. James glanced at the Governor, as if asking for permission - to which it was wordlessly given, and turned back to the twenty year old.

"Peachtree Mall," James explained. "It's a little far out but it's good for supplies since it had barely been touched by the raids."

Samantha nodded, rubbing her head.

These people had taken care of her and Nathan, put clothes on their back and fed them. She needed to repay them somehow, even if they only did this to apologize - it was only right. "I can come along," She offered, causing all the men to look at her with a sense of surprise.

"You don't have to." The Governor stated, but Samantha merely smiled.

"I want to, sir. Let me repay you before we leave," The word leave made Nathan's face fall to his plate, the dread to having to look over his shoulder every moment plaguing his mind.

The leader pondered for a moment, gazing at the beautiful woman before he nodded his head. "I'll give you your weapons before you head off," He informed. "Maybe you can even think about the position I offered you."

Not that long later, SUV was being set up near the gates of the town. Merle Dixon was speaking time Martinez, and as if sensing her presence, he turned and exposed his infamous crooked smirk."Can't stay away from me, deputy princess, can ya?" He whistled.

Samantha scoffed. "It's the other way around actually," She sassed, leaning against the side of the car with her arms crossed. "You're like a curse."

"I'm hurt, darlin'," Mock hurts flashed across Merle's face, and Martinez rolled his eyes from behind him. "I thought we was friends."

"Merle, you don't consider anyone your friend."

Merle let out a laugh that resembled a hyena, his smirk widening even more before slipping into the SUV.

From behind her, voices caught her attention and so she looked over her shoulder. James and the Governor was talking, and there was worry etched on the older man's face. "Any word on my son, sir?"

Samantha frowned, turning her body to look at them fully. "Last word I got was a week ago - they're somewhere in Birmingham, but I can assure you that he's fine."

The sunlight exposed the water that welled up in James's eyes. "It's been close to three weeks, Governor."

The leader opened his mouth to speak but she never got the chance to hear what he said because a finger tapped her shoulder and she turned, meeting the face of Martinez. "Here, the Governor told me to give these to you."

He handed Samantha her pistol and dagger, and she failed back to hold a large smile, checking the engraved initials that had always been there. The sight of the S.W made her happiness swell up, but it was also layered with sadness. She missed her brother.

"Don't worry, I'll still give you protection." She lifted her head and caught the grin across Martinez's face.

Samantha mirrored it. "Or maybe I'll be the one protecting you." She quipped, the laugh the two adults sharing making the twenty year old realize how much she was actually warming up.

She glanced behind her and saw that the Governor and James were no longer speaking, her curiosity (and nosiness) being grasped by their topic.

"His son went on a supply trip a few weeks back. He was the only one to ever control Keri," Martinez caused her to look back at him, his mouth twisted up into a knowing smile. "Couldn't help but notice that you were eavesdropping."

Samantha already suspected that Keri was James's daughter - they both had so many shared similarities in their features, but she never knew that he had a son too. It reminded her of her brother and for a second, she felt sympathy for the dark skinned woman. Maybe that's why she had been so nasty, because she didn't know where her brother was just like Samantha.

Maybe all she needed was the benefit of the doubt.

Samantha shook her head and caught the darkened eyes of the man next to her. She surveyed him before lean close, her greens twinkling and a smirk gracing the chapped pink of her lips. "Keep looking, you'll notice a lot of things about me."

Martinez tried fighting the smirk that urged the corner of his lips, shaking his head and letting a low chuckle escape his lips. "Guess I'll keep an eye out then."

━━━━━━━━━━

The shopping mall cuts into the blue sky like an unholy temple, casting a long shadow onto the world around. The Georgia sun made Samantha's dark hair feel hot under its heavy glare, but the faint breeze took her mind off of it. Upon getting out of the car, she noted the old newspapers were dancing in the wind, and she caught one of the titles; The End is Near.

Her lips pulled upwards at the irony. "Jesus, this is some Dawn of the Dead remake shit." Samantha remarked.

"When there is no more room in Hell, the dead will walk the Earth." James voice met her ears and she turned to face his smile. "I was a bit of a fan of a George Romero myself."

Samantha's scoff didn't go unnoticed. "I used to be too, but I find myself cursing his ass everyday."

"That's disrespectful." Martinez butted in, wielding a bat.

Instead of agreeing with his comrade, he agreed with the woman that broke his daughter's nose. "No, I can understand. He was known as the Godfather of the dead after all."

There was nothing but kindness behind James's eyes, a certain twinkle that reminded Samantha of someone once ago, who's words produced philosophy and his head was always covered by a fishermen's hat. That aching sadness clenched her heart.

"Jesus Christ, dad," The mere sound of Keri's snippy attitude made Samantha's blood faintly tremble with heat. "You cease to amaze me with how much of a nerd you are."

"And everyday I wish you inherited that trait like me and your brother," James chuckled, but it didn't quite meet the look in his eyes. "Antibiotics, clothes, food, the usual," The older man began listing off. "Me and Keri will check the second floors, Samantha and Martinez will check the first floor, and Merle-"

"Yer ol' pal Merle will do whatever the fuck he wants," The older man cut him off with his features twisting, as if challenging the other man to say otherwise.

James scowled. "Yeah, that." He said it as if he were used to it, but so was Samantha - Merle was known for never listening to anyone but himself, which is probably what got him abandoned on the roof in the first place.

A taller figure leaned down to her, his voice lowering to a whisper. "Guess me and you will get to know each other."

Samantha's eyes rolled with amusement, the side grin failing her. She wasn't trying to get to know anyone - she just wanted to leave and search for the lost.

Bur having a little fun wouldn't hurt.

The building on the inside appeared completely desolated, stores left uncared for and shopping bags abandoned. The silence was loud, the lack of walkers or life unsettling Samantha and making her skin become invaded by goosebumps.

She wished Nathan was there, but apparently the Governor needed him - probably to persuade him to join his military wannabe ranks. It was impressive, but something about it didn't settle right in her gut. It was nothing but a faint whisper, and she couldn't make out the warnings it was trying to tell her.

James handed out walkie talkies from a bag that was once on his back. "Keep it on, and remember - radio channel 20 if you need anything."

Samantha hooked it onto her pants, and continued deeper into the mall, Martinez following behind her with his bat lazily slung over "Where are we off to first, deputy princess?"

"Forever 21," The brunette threw a quick look over her shoulder. "And only one person can call me that."

"Is that a challenge?" The playfulness returned and layered his voice, and she could imagine the large toothy smile plastered across his face.

"Nah, just a statement, Babe Ruth." She quipped, his small laughter meeting her ears and causing her to grin.

The large letters of Forever 21 came into view and she peered into the glass of the store. It was slightly dim from the lack of light, but she could see well enough to know there wasn't any life inside - at least for now.
The silence felt like a secret, foreboding message, something that kept her gun raised and clenched in her grasp as if it were her own life she was holding, which she probably was.

The thought of her brother always brought a heaviness on her soul. Seeing all these expensive clothes brought back memories of Shane wanting to spoil her, especially on the days of her birthday, but Samantha had never really been the one to care for high end clothes. Thrift shops were her calling, and whatever money she did have from working night shifts at her local restaurant she used on makeup and other essentials.

The regret was hard to shake off, coming to full terms that she never truly appreciated how much her brother adored her and how much he protected her. Samantha took a lot of things for granted, but she promised herself that would all change when she would find him.

"So, why are we here?" Martinez's voice brought her back to reality. He was gazing at some of the mannequins with an uneasy expression. They stood tall and especially creepy in the midst of an apocalypse.

"Just wanted to look around. I've never been here before." Samantha admitted.

A quiet groan was heard from within the store. The two barely glanced at one another before stepping forward cautiously. It didn't take long for them to be at the back, a door standing tauntingly in front of them.

That's when the smell hit them.

It was so familiar yet awfully horrible. Samantha's chiseled features scrunched up in repulsion as the smell of rotting flesh hit her nose. She knew what was about to come, the smell a fair warning of what could lay behind that door.

With one hand on the doorknob and the other gripping his bat, Martinez swung open the door and the smell overwhelmed her, but the sight made everything else nonexistent. "Oh Jesus, fuck."

Hanging from the ceiling of an office was a man, a rope wrapped around his neck and more growls and snarls emitted from his rotting lips as he reached forward almost desperately. Telling by the looks of it, he's been there for awhile.

Samantha felt a bit of shame for not being surprised, but winter brought many things and she's probably become a little desensitized.

"That's..." Martinez trailed off. Samantha didn't even have to listen to know what he meant, instead she walked in and took a chair from behind the desk, setting it near the corpse.

"What are you doing?" He asked, watching the ebony haired beauty through furrowed brows as she climbed onto the piece of furniture.

Samantha avoided the outstretched hands of the walker. "We can't just leave him here." She stated simply, pulling out her dagger - but something made her stop, everything within her pausing. She squinted, eying the features of the corpse as her heart went wild in her chest.

He looked like Shane.

Suddenly the walker grabbed a fist full of her hair and Samantha let out a yelp, her movements quick as she reached forward and plunged her blade into the skull of the flailing walker.

Martinez caught her, his hands soft on her olive skin as a frown rested across his mouth. "You look like you seen a ghost."

Samantha did, and she tried to avoid letting her eyes linger on the swaying body - but the damage at been done. Her lower lip was quivering with the promise of tears, her heart thumping wildly in her chest and making her anxieties become an electrical storm in her stomach.

For a second, she really thought it was him.

That was one of her biggest fears, seeing Shane as the thing that ripped the world away, and it made everything feel completely hopeless - but her survival meant something, and that's what kept everything in her alive.

Martinez didn't question her silence.

There was a small bar a few stores down and shelves of alcohol still intact. It looked untouched, as if time had stood still and everything was left just as it was before. Samantha had been to bars before, but it was trashy ones that didn't even bother to check IDs, which is how she got in so easily at such a young age.

Martinez went behind the counter, grinning. "Looks like we got every type of liquor."

"What about water?" Samantha inquired, and confusion crossed his face. Her cheeks flamed, sitting on the stool in front of him. "I don't drink."

"You're just full of surprises, aren't you?" He remarked, revealing a bottle of Jack Daniels as he poured some into the brim of a glass. The same hunger filled every fiber of her being as she watched the amber substance swirl. "So, tell me, Sam. What were you before all of this?"

"Not a very fun question for the first date," Samantha teased. "I was just a college student by day, waitress at night."

Martinez chuckled, bringing the glass to his lips. "I was a coach for the local high school."

The ebony haired woman rose a brow, a cheeky smile gracing her. "So, you're telling me there was a chance you could've been my coach?"

Confusion contorted his expression again, and he leaned close to her. He could see how young she was through the details on her face. "How old are you, exactly?"

"I turn twenty-one in October."

"Jesus, I didn't think you were that young." Martinez admitted.

Samantha leaned forward daringly, her smile growing and cutting into her flushed cheeks. "Don't worry, old man, my age doesn't take away the fact that college gave me experience."

A low chuckled rumbled his chest as his tongue swiped over his bottom lip. "I bet."

Her eyes flickered down before back at his browns. "I'm sure the misses wouldn't like you flirting with another woman."

The gold band on his wedding finger was shiny and almost hard to miss. He was quick to pull his hand back, a gentle sadness on his face. "If she were alive, she would care."

Samantha frowned, her fingers caressing the 22 necklace around her neck. "I'm sorry, I didn't know."

Martinez's eyes peered at the ground, trying to conceal his grief. "It's fine, at least she doesn't have to live like this," The glass of liquor was brought to his lips and he took a shot, his adam's apple bobbing up as he swallowed.

She realized that she wasn't the only one that needed a distraction - he did too. "I lost some people too along the way," Samantha admitted, faintly remembering a pretty blonde and wise, gentle brown eyes, and a little girl that didn't have a chance. "They were in the group me and Merle used to be in."

"Is that how you two knew each other?" Martinez inquired.

"We used to get high together back in our old camp."

As if they had been heard, there was a crackling from Martinez's walkie and the Devil himself spoke through. "Hey, taco bender - ya done tryin' to get into deputy princess's panties?"

He scowled, his ears going red at the smirk that grew on the woman's face. "What do you want?" He snapped, the walkie clenched in his hand.

"Been hearin' a bunch of shit going down in the little lady's restroom, don't know if there's biters or somethin' else." The two met eyes and held each other's gazed, before wordlessly agreeing with one another to go check it out.

After passing the old food court Samantha could make out Dead or Alive being sung, and then as they rounded the corner they found Merle being an old fool again and singing to himself. He was leaning against the wall near the woman's restroom, his prosthetic tapping impatiently against it. "Took you guys long 'nough," He remarked. "Everything went silent 'bout a few minutes ago, but I know there's somethin' there."

Without another word brought his pistol from his belt - which Samantha thought was strange, because his arm was enough of a weapon alone. After preparing themselves, the door to the bathroom was open, and the smell was a punch to the face.

This was worse than the walker in the office, it was more fresh and more bloody. Horror made her veins run cold at the sight of the massacre of bodies on the once white title, their insides painting the walls and the floors a new color of a deep shade of red. An old, shit came from Martinez but Merle remained indifferent, his expression becoming concealed.

Samantha stepped forward and felt her skin crawl when she stepped into a puddle of blood, vomit rising to her throat. She's always hated blood, she could never stand it - this just pushed her limits. She continued forward, her weapon raised and remembering her brother's words to never let her guard down and keep an eye out on her surroundings.

The two men behind her investigated the bodies while Samantha avoided stepping into any blood (which she failed miserably). Something in the corner of the bathroom caught her eye, and bending down to a slumped body, she took the silvery chain into her hands and brought it to her eyes. The locket was the shape of a heart and revealed her distorted face reflecting back at her, words spelling out Sloan in the middle.

"Guys, these aren't walkers," Martinez's voice made her look at them, realization making his skin blanch. "They were people."

"So?" Merle said.

"So, that means someone did this," His words made shivers run down her spine as she glanced around at the bodies. She's hasn't seen so much mutilation since the massacre at the camp, but those were by walkers and not at all human. "Look, they were tied up too - something about this doesn't seem right."

A loud crash made Samantha gasp as something came barging through from one of the stalls. A small body targeted Martinez and launched itself on his back. The man let out a frightened yell, "Get the hell of me!" He screamed, swirling around in circles with his bat as the thing pulled at his head.

With dirt and blood staining his ivory skin, his dark brown hair in all directions, she could see the two bright blue eyes. They were wide and wild, but they weren't dead. "Wait, it's just a kid!" Samantha found her voice and hurried forward but Merle was quicker, taking his gun and smacking the boy on the back of the head.

The boy fell limp, his body hitting the floor like a ragged doll. Martinez slumped against the wall of the bathroom with deep and shallow breaths, swallowing a lump in his throat as the adrenaline of fear faded away.

"Jesus christ! You knocked a kid out!" Samantha exclaimed, looking at the Dixon in outrage.

"What else was I supposed ta do? Bride him with candy?" Merle quipped, reaching for his walkie. "James, we got us a little feral child."

After a moment, there was a crackle and through it came a concerned voice. "Is he dead?"

Merle glanced at the kid. "I don't think so - could be unconscious. Guess we'll find out."

Samantha sent him a brief glare and approached the child, observing the way his chest fell up and down softly. He was alive, but he definitely didn't fit the part. He looked like a walker - feral, just as Merle had said.

For some reason, something told her that this was just a disguise.

A whimper came from his parted lips and his eyes fluttered opened. "Rachel?" His voice was small and hoarse, but there was a clear southern accent that she knew wasn't Georgian at all. He was looking at Samantha as if he didn't see her but someone else - someone that brought him great sorrow, and then the boy fell still again.

"We'll head back and have Dr.Stevens do a check up, but for now bring him to the car. Is everybody okay?"

Loud laughter boomed in the bloody bathroom and Samantha glanced upwards to see Merle Dixon peering at a silent Martinez, humor and cockiness on every detail of his face and his pale eyes full of mockery.

"Make sure ya grab some diapers," Merle spoke into the walkie. "I think ya boy just 'bout shit his pants."

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟnote

i'm so sorry about the long wait! i feel like this chapter was pretty shitty tbh lmao if you haven't heard and don't follow me already, i revamped the story so if you're confused on the sudden POV change that's why- i would recommend skimming through the first few chapters because some things have been altered. ily guys and stay golden!

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