CHAPTER THIRTY NINE,
melancholy

MEMORIES WERE MORE of a curse than a blessing when there was something inevitably painful. They were internal hauntings, becoming real life ghosts that possessed the mind of the twenty year old and she couldn't simply find a solution to this sense of melancholy.

They used to be her sanctuary, but now they brought a heaviness to her heart that she couldn't shake off. Samantha thought of the Grimes family, Glenn, and always her brother Shane.

She thought about Daryl a lot too.

To keep her mind preoccupied she was always helping around the community with the job that was given to her. Elliot had been her only patient once, but as the days went and people heard of her, that list grew.

They needed help, and Samantha was the one that provided it.

It had always been her dream, and the Governor has easily given it to her when she thought that opportunity had been taken away from her.

But as days turned into weeks, Samantha's come to realize that she would selfishly give it all back if that meant to see Shane again.

She could see the nightly torches behind Elliot's eyes, embers and flames flickering in his irises. He hadn't spoken for quite some time now, but she was used to it.

He didn't like speaking much, and Samantha was sure that she was the only person he did speak to.

Elliot was a boy who had already lived for fourteen years, his past still hidden but she could finally make it out through the cracks that he seemed to leave on his hard facade. He definitely missed New Orleans.

But he was also someone of a rough past.

His grandparents had fell ill, and his family took a trip to Georgia to visit them. That was the very thing that got him stuck here.

Whenever she would try to press about his family, Elliot would immediately shut down everything.

Samantha would always watch him and wonder what was going inside, trying to go through the dark mazes that was his head. But every corner was a dead end, and she was pretty sure he did that purposely.

"Do they always watch that wall?" Came his voice, gazing at the men over the wall with his eyes clouded with deep thought.

Samantha brought his eyes to him. She was so tired, and she could feel the patience from within her thinning. "From what I know," Elliot hasn't stopped watching those guards since he came in. "The Governor makes sure to keep this place secured."

"He acts like a king." He mumbled, scoffing at the mention of the leader.

Over the course of the weeks, she noticed the distaste Elliot seemed to seethe for Philip Blake. When she would ask, he would just give her a look that made her feel incredibly stupid.

He was good at that.

"It's a good thing we aren't here to talk about him," Samantha forced a faint smile. "Look, we've been going back and forth for two months and I've barely know anything about you."

"So?" He deadpanned, crossing his arms over his chest stubbornly.

Samantha swallowed thickly. "Who's Rachel?"

As soon as the name left the barons of her mouth Elliot went completely still, his body rooted to the spot and his eyes going hard as stone. The young woman frowned, peering at him expectingly.

"You accidentally called me her when we first met-"

"She's an old friend," He interjected coldly, avoiding her concerned gaze as anger fumed inside him like a dragon.

Her eyebrows furrowed. She doubted that.

"Were those men old friends too?" Samantha pressed, the memory of those bloody, mutilated bodies embedded into her brain.

Elliot looked over his shoulder, his features darkening like storm clouds and that hatred glinting his eyes. "No, they were bad people."

His words dripped venomously from his tongue, the emotions on his face making a shiver run up down her spine.

"They were bad people."

His blue eyes had more darkness than any brown eyes she's ever seen.

Before she could string together a sentence, the door to her office was ripped open and her best friend barged in. Samantha almost flipped her shit, standing up from her desk. "Nate, what the actual-"

She never finished her sentence.

Her words seemed to get caught up in her throat as a woman of blonde hair came from behind Nathan. Those familiar grayish blue eyes stared at her as if she thought Samantha was just a hallucination, and the twenty year old wondered herself if the person standing before her was just a mirage.

"Andrea?" She whispered and staggered back, her brain stuttering in shock.

Samantha knew she wasn't crazy, but the sight of seeing someone from her past made her try to distinguish reality and fiction.

"Hi." Andrea Harrison breathed out, a smile of relief reaching her features.

It was as if an invisible force shoved her forward. Samantha threw her arms around the last one she thought she'd ever embrace. A breath left Andrea's body, her surprise being paired with happiness.

"How is this possible?" Samantha questioned, pulling away and glancing at the window where Elliot was.

His disappearance made her feel a twinge of sadness.

"Merle found us where a helicopter crashed and brought us here," Andrea explained. "Never thought I'd see him again."

"Us?" Samantha echoed glancing over to Nathan.

That's when she noticed the other presence in the room.

The woman stood there like a shadow, her skin dark and even darker dreads framing her face like curtains. Her eyes were sharp, calculating, resembling a hawk in the human flesh.

Samantha thought she would've been intimidated by this stranger, but instead she thought the woman looked simply badass.

"Whoa," Samantha blurted out in awe. "I didn't know Kill Bill was real."

Nathan released a chuckle, leaning against the wall with his arms crossing over his chest and his teeth biting into the grin on his lips.

"The Governor was supposed to escort them to their rooms, but as soon as I mentioned to Andrea that you were here she wanted to see you first."

She was surprised, looking at the blonde in disbelief.

"You look good." Andrea stated.

"You look like shit," Samantha retorted.

She looked sick, with her skin pale and layered with sweat, dark circles under her tired eyes. It looked like the world had taken a beating on her.

Andrea restrained a laugh. "I've had better days."

Samantha looked back at the woman, who had already been watching her when she did. She looked back at Andrea with hope.

"Do you know anything about the group? About my brother?"

The sadness that creeped on Andrea's face made all hope come crashing down.

"I hoping you did," She stated, frowning deeply. "I haven't seen them since the farm. I'm sorry."

Everything within Samantha seemed to crumble, her heart cracking and her mind being plagued again - but not by memories, by fear.

Fear was a demon that challenged hope. She wanted to conquer it, wanted to control it, but she was starting to lose grip on it. She felt as if the fear was slowly eating her up from the inside, leaving a trail of rot behind.

Samantha masked it like always, but she was starting to worry she wouldn't see any of them again.

━━━━━

The Governor's weekly flame was giving both Michonne and Andrea a tour through Woodbury, showing off the security and the accomplishment the place is. Nathan was assigned to keep an eye on them and was accompanied by Crowley.

He tried to keep a serious facade, he really did.

But every time Andrea glanced at him, the smile was hard to push away. Happiness spread through him and it felt so sweet, because he was glad that she was alive and she had made it.

Nathan neared them, his hand resting on the holster of his gun. "The Governor put you up to this?"

The way she said his name was as if it were a joke, a title like had called it the night before.

The Governor. It was a strange nickname to choose out of the thousands, but Nathan got used to it pretty quickly.

He smiled cheekily. "Gotta keep the man happy." He responded, and she rolled her eyes playfully.

The silent woman next to her glowered at him, her hard rock eyes narrowed and following his every movement.

She made him feel nervous, like one wrong move and she would be on him like a black panther on a deer.

"Since when did you follow orders?" Andrea's voice brought him back into reality.

Nathan turned away from Michonne, but he still could feel her lingering stare. "Since he put food in my stomach."

It was simple, but true. Nathan owed everything to the Governor - he gave him a place and food, and even had ranked up to being one of his most trusted men. Woodbury was a blessing made by God, but he just wished Samantha could see it that way too.

A figure caught his eye and he turned, the Devil himself standing in the distance. He was tall amongst the people, standing out look like a sore thumb. Upon making eye contact, the leader nodded and Nathan understood what that meant.

He sent Andrea an apologetic smile, avoided bringing his attention to Michonne before walking away.

Not only did they bring back to women, but they brought back a national guard too. He had barely been alive, but Dr.Stevens was able to cheat Death for a bit and keep him in the light.

Still, the man wouldn't tell a soul on where his convoy was.

"If he knows what you were before he might tell us where they are," The Governor explained. "We need to find them."

Nathan furrowed his brows, meeting the pale blues of his leader. "To help them, right?"

The Governor looked a little surprised at the question. "Of course. Men like you deserve to be helped for everything you done for this country," His hand was placed on his shoulder, his touch reassuring. "Can you do this for me?"

Nathan sucked his bottom lip in between his teeth, glancing at the door

Brothers in arms are supposed to be there for another when they fall, no matter whatever the branch they stem from. They all come from the same tree, the same values and the same bravery they held the roots that kept them alive.

It was his duty to help him and the others, so he nodded.

Upon entering, Nathan could him on the hospital bed. His skin was losing color, sweat glistening his flesh.

His heart clenched, and he inhaled heavily. "Sir, my name is Sergeant Nathan Barton. I worked for the United States Army."

The man stared at him skeptically, eying the young soldier before him with clear caution. Nathan glanced at the Governor before pulling out his dog tags from beneath his shirt.

"I understand why you're so hesitate, but I promise you I haven't lied about my identity a day in my life - see?"

The man took glimpses at the tags, and the muscles in his face relaxed. "You worked with Lieutenant Booths, didn't you?"

The mention of his former lieutenant made Nathan slightly smile but at the same time it made him shudder too, remembering the hallucination he had of him as well.

"How are you feeling, sir?"

More shallow breaths. "Like shit," He breathed. "I'm Lieutenant Welles, I was a Pilot. Things were orderly, the fences held, people were protected, food supplies were lasting - then one of the men inside got bitten, not sure how. He went haywire, panic swept through the camp. Someone opened the gate to escape, others were bitten and infected. These people went crazy. The whole place went to hell in a few hours. My team grabbed whatever supplies and vehicles we could abandoned our post,"

Coughs traveled from his throat and out of his mouth, Dr.Stevens reaching for a glass of water and letting Welles have a sip. The Governor was silent, sending the nurse a nod and she left the room.

"Did any of you escaped?" Nathan pressed, leaning forward with a frown.

"There was ten of us in my group," Welles heaved. "We got maybe sixty miles away from the post before getting jammed up on the highway. I took the bird up in the air to scout ahead. She took a beating to the right, but we had no choice," His eyes went behind Nathan and at the leader. "My guys?"

Pity was written on the face of the Governor and there was a faint shake of his head. The Lieutenant's eyes begin to brim with tears, a choked sob coming out.

"I'm sorry." Nathan whispered, bowing his head for the fallen soldiers.

"Let me go find the rest," The Governor offered softly, approaching the bedside. "Bring them here where they will be safe. They're out there waiting for you, exposed."

"Let us find them, and we promise you if they are still alive, we'll bring them here." Nathan added, assurance on his tongue and a silent pledge in the gray irises of his eyes.

And the lieutenant did.

Nathan followed the Governor out of the building, his scalp becoming hot from underneath the sun. Children laughing, dogs running across the grass, adults conversing as if the virus didn't birth them tragedies.

"I can see how you do it." He spoke, the turn they took leading them to a path filled with dirt and grass.

"What do you mean?" The Governor asked.

Nathan smiled. "These people - they're happy, and it's all because of you. That's your secret fuel, huh?"

His merely chuckled, his hand resting on the knob to the metal door. "I wouldn't take all the credit, it's because of you and my men too."

Opening a door, they were met with Milton's lab, or what Nathan like to call it; The Walmart version of the CDC.

"You finished your homework?"

"Unfortunately the dog's eating it already." Milton remarked, approaching his desk.

"What the hell did you call me?"

Merle Dixon appeared with his face contorted into anger, his heavy steps following behind the wannabe scientist but Nathan was quicker, placing a hand up with his other on his pistol.

"I didn't know we were back in high school." The soldier remarked, his mocking smile making the redneck grit his teeth.

"What, you wanna take his lunch money while you're at it?" The Governor agreed.

"Sorry, Governor."

Their leader stepped forward, his features stern. "Maybe I've wasted my time with you. Maybe you haven't learned anything at all."

Nathan could see the restraint in Merle's face, twitching and growing. Being all muscular and stubborn, it still continued to surprise him at how obedient the tough redneck was, having grown used to him following his own law - Merle Dixon's law. Still, he backed down like a guard dog would at the demand of its owner's voice. A guard dog - wasn't that what he was acting like now? The Governor's dog.

"He was trying to smoke in here."

At Milton's sigh, Nathan was brought from his head and turned to look at the wannabe scientist. "Well, aren't you just a snitch." He chided.

"And you, I expect better," The Governor continued. "Keep pokin' the bear and you're bound to get mauled. Remember that,"

He sent a glance towards Milton before looking back at Merle. "Tell me about the girl."

"Names Andrea."

Milton lifted his head with surprise reflecting off his eyes. "You know her?"

"We both do," Nathan chimed in, all attention going to him. "At our old group."

"She's from that group from Atlanta?" The Governor interrogated.

"Same one that left me on the roof, forced me to mutilate myself." Merle informed.

Nathan chuckled sarcastically. "If I remember correctly, your fat mouth forced you to mutilate yourself."

Merle glared at the soldier, opening his mouth to speak but the firm stare of his leader made him think otherwise.

"Does she know your brother Daryl?" The Governor pressed, stepping closer.

There was a shift in the redneck's eyes. "She did."

"Then talk to her again, see what else you can find out," The Governor looked to his other right hand man. "How's Samantha with that boy?"

"Nothing new, sir." Nathan answered.

"Let me know if she finds out anything about his group," The Governor looked away, contemplating a decision. "Also, about that convoy - I need someone to stay here and keep an eye on Woodbury while we go check it out. Can you do that?"

"But sir," Nathan began, his eyebrows furrowed. "If they are in the military, I can help you. If they knew who I was-"

"I understand that," The Governor interrupted. "I trust you, you're one of the strongest men here - but for this trip, I need you to stay here and be in charge of this place. It would fall apart without you."

He still thought it was strange. He was brought everywhere on all their trips.

Yet Nathan didn't ask any further questions and obliged his leader like he has been doing for the last two months.

━━━━━

Samantha was never fond of her own birthdays.

It wasn't because of a personal issue, it was just that celebrating another year was never something she thought should be celebrated.

Why celebrate your life very obviously decreasing?

But like every year she was constantly reminded, because the day of her birth was not just hers, but the origin of something else.

She could tell her birthday would be over the horizon when her neighbors would start putting up those spooky decorations, when children would be more excited as the days past, when almost every channel was filled with horror movies such as Micheal Myers or Freddy Kruger.

Samantha had turned twenty last Halloween when it was rained like a thousand nails on the window of the RV and the dead had been roaming the world for officially a month.

If it weren't for Shane, she would've completely forgotten it was her birthday. She always wondered how he kept up with the days, because he was no Dale when it came to the importance of time.

Now that Samantha really thought about it, her big brother always seemed more excited when it came to her birthday than her.

Shane was always there for her birthdays, always the ones to remind everyone and always the ones to get the gifts.

He spoiled her like she was his own daughter, and maybe in a way she was. Shane did raise her after their parents die, taught her things a father would to their child.

The familiar feeling of sadness came back like an inescapable curse. All Samantha wanted for her birthday was to see him again.

Two pairs of dirty boots came into her vision, and from her spot on the bench she lifted her head up and met the eyes of those who belonged to the woman that came with Andrea.

She was a tough looking woman, but Samantha was intrigued by her. The fact that she used two katanas as her own personal weapon fueled it even more.

"Michonne, right?"

It was like she was speaking to a wall. The woman was still, her eyes narrowing as she observed Samantha. For some reason, her gut was telling her that Michonne wasn't judging her or anything.

She was trying to figure her out.

"I heard you had two katanas," Samantha continued, a small grin tugging her lips. "Kinda like The Bride? That's kickass."

Her words almost got a reaction out of Michonne. Almost.

Her mouth seemed to twitch up but nothing more. She continued to stare at her with calculating eyes. "You don't seem like a stupid girl."

Samantha scanned the face of the mysterious woman, her first words to her both shocking her and making her even more curious.

"But first some reason, you're still stuck here in play land," Michonne continued, her voice as sharp as the katanas she used to wield. "Why?"

Why?

When Samantha thought about it, she didn't know anymore. It could be for a lot of reasons.

Maybe she actually wanted to help that boy that seemed to have an opposing nature as a defense mechanism. Or perhaps seeing Nathan happy and more alive than he's ever been made her happy.

Quite possibly, it was the promise that the Governor gave her that kept her holding onto Woodbury.

What she did know was that she couldn't deny that this place made her hesitant. It was a strange feeling, but she was a girl that had always trusted her gut.

It seemed like her silence had been an answer for Michonne, because when Samantha lifted her head the woman was already gone. She glanced around the streets, but something else got her attention.

The gates to the town were opening and military styled vehicles came rolling in. Philip climbed out first, followed by Merle and James.

Confusion came over her when she spotted her best friend on top of the wall. Nathan was always next to the Governor when they went on trips, being his right hand man next to Merle.

Philip stood on one of the trucks like a king addressing his people.

"Yesterday we brought three new people," The silence took over the streets, all his citizens listening intently. "One was a helicopter pilot with the National Guard outfit. Even though he's clinging to life, he told us about his convoy on the highway. His men,"

James had a look on his face that Samantha has never seen before. He always had a sweet smile that matched his even sweeter personality, but that was no longer there. From where she was sitting, she could make out the frown.

His whole demeanor was off.

"I promised that I'd bring them back here alive, but they didn't have our walls or our fences. The biters got them before we did. These men had trucks and the trucks had weapons, food, medicine. Things we need. Now, we didn't know them but we'll honor their sacrifice by not taking what we have for granted,"

She remembered Nathan had been the ones to probe answers out of the dying lieutenant and she glanced at him, but his face was crestfallen.

"Won't be long before dark, so go home and be thankful for what you have, watch out for each other." He finished, climbing from the vehicle and the crowd separated.

"He's full of shit."

Samantha turned around.

He stood there with the blue in his eyes cold and his glare hard. His arms were crossed over his chest, pieces of his growing brown hair hanging over his forehead in curls. He would've looked like a boy if it weren't for how venomous his words dripped.

Samantha stated at him with a frown, wondering what Philip had done that created a distaste Elliot had.

"Why?" She asked, her fingers gripping the split ends to her dark hair.

Elliot looked at her, and the way he did made her feel stupid. "I know what lying looks like, and it comes from faces like his."

Samantha rubbed her head. Something about his words had a deeper meaning, a riddle she couldn't solve.

She didn't one hundred percent trust the Governor like Nathan did. Something about about him never settled right, a gut feeling that pointed a finger at her and taunted her for making a deal with a man she didn't know.

She was smarter than that, but she was also so desperate to find her group and so desperate to find Shane.

When Samantha came back to reality Elliot was gone, his disappearance so abrupt that it made her question if he had just been a figment of her imagination.

But he had always liked the element of surprise.

She let out a sigh and placed her hands on her lap, and then lifted them again when she felt something solid yet thin in her pants. Samantha looked down and saw the outline of a heart, and that's when the memories came whirling back to her

She dug a hand through the pockets of her worn out jeans and felt the familiar coolness of a chain. Pulling it out, the locket of the heart that she hasn't touched in two months glinted in the sun.

Samantha's eyebrows furrowed when she turned over, a feeling of stupidity washing over her when she saw the crack.

Using her fingernails, she wedged it open and there was a faint pop, the heart dividing into two.

There was a picture inside, preserved and obviously from the old world. When she peered closer, she felt her eyes go round as shock filled her belly.

The image of the family was a mixture of brown and blue eyes smiling back at her. They all sat at a picnic table near a lake, the couple sitting next to their teenage daughter and son.

Elliot was sitting next to his father, a large and lively smile on his face that no longer existed on the boy that was today.

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟnote

IM SO DAMN HAPPY WE FINALLY GOT TO THE SHOWS STORYLINE.

I SUCK AT WRITING OG PLOTS.

i just wanted to establish where samantha and nathan are in woodbury, because major things will be happening there but DONT WORRY. her and daryl will find one another again SOON.

if you have any theories or anything, i would love to hear it.

we need a ship name too, and i'm honestly so horrible trying to come with any.

words ; 4289
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