We get stuck on shadowing actual patrols for several weeks. Not that I mind all that much. The Hunter and Protector we're shadowing are happy to show off. They strut around like peacocks trying to find a mate, but they don't really seem to care if we pay attention.

After a few weeks there, we all finally get a night off base without supervision.

Amari, Sasha, and I manage to give Ryan the slip at a travel center when he dashes off to go to the bathroom. We change buses before he can get back and keep our heads down until the bus is out of the station.

He may be trying to be friends with us, but that doesn't mean we trust him to keep any of our secrets from Singh.

The bus can't take us all the way that we need to go, but that's fine. We don't want to risk the cameras following us anyway.

Sasha and Amari are walking ahead of me, pointing at the city sights they haven't really enjoyed since joining the Academy. They lean together, giggling and kissing occasionally.

I keep checking the burner phone, making sure we're following Tae's directions correctly.

Sasha and Amari fall in beside me, each linking an arm through mine.

"Stop being so serious," Amari demands.

"When are we going to get another night off, Mason? C'mon, live a little."

"I'm here, aren't I?"

"No, you're glued to that phone."

"Maybe he'd be enjoying himself more if Tarak were here."

I roll my eyes. "Why don't you two go enjoy yourselves and I'll meet with Tae and Tomas alone?"

"Yeah, right," Amari scoffs. "We're in this together."

"OH!" Sasha yanks both of us to the side as we're crossing over a bridge. "We can see the Island from here!" She points into the distance.

The lights of the Academy glitter over the water, like some far-off planet surrounded by stars.

I hate that they're right. I hate that I'd be smiling and laughing like they are if Tarak were here. Even before my crush developed, we were best friends. We had so many inside jokes we could be sharing right now, the same way Amari and Sasha are.

Sasha grabs Amari and drags her down aways, leaving me to stare at the Academy by myself. They laugh and kiss and my heart clenches.

I keep staring across the water, as if I'll be able to see Tarak out on the training fields or in his bedroom window, if only I look hard enough.

Amari comes bounding up to me and grabs my elbow. "C'mon, we'll be late."

"Can you see him?" I ask, before I can stop myself. Amari's got better senses than me.

Her hands tighten on my arm as her shoulders slump. "Even my vision isn't that good, Mace."

"Right," I croak. "No, yeah, I just..." I don't have an excuse. She wouldn't believe it even if I did.

Amari gives a half-smile, though the worry in her eyes ruins it. She swipes at my face like she's brushing away a tear, but there's not one there. She kisses my forehead. "C'mon," she whispers again. "We'll be late."