AN: yesterday I picked up a snake and it musked on me. I feel you little snake. I feel you.

Uh heads up if you don't like mentions of poop or other natural snake things I suggest you don't read this.

Crowley is more snake-like then you think.

Aziraphale only realized this recently. He was going to give his sweet demon a surprise hug. It started with Aziraphale walking up from behind. He wrapped his arms around Crowley.

This surprised Crowley. Right then and there he did what most snakes would naturally do. He pooped.

"Ngh..."

Crowley's face was bright red with embarrassment. He ran off to the bathroom.

"Ah shit..."

Aziraphale knocked on the door. "Crowley?"

Tears were running down Crowley's cheeks. He was trying to miracle his pants clean and the awful scent of his musk away. The poop disappeared, but the smell stayed.

Aziraphale started to knock on the door. "Crowley? Crowley are you alright?"

Crowley sat down against the back of the door.

"You scared me, Aziraphale. I musked."

Crowley put his head in between his knees. He began to sob.

Aziraphale said, "It's alright, dear. Don't cry. Please open the door."

Crowley stood up and cracked the door. He looked through the door at Aziraphale.

"Hello, dear."

"Hi... Oh I smell awful."

Aziraphale said, "It's alright. Did you get yourself all cleaned up?"

Crowley nodded and wiped away a few tears. He then opened the door completely. He walked out and said, "I'm so sorry, Aziraphale."

Aziraphale said, "It's alright. Don't cry."

He then hugged Crowley. "I got you a little gift a while back and I was waiting for you to stylize yourself in a more feminine style to give it to you. I suppose you could use it now."

Aziraphale then scurried off. He came back with a lovely set of perfumes.

"Try these!"

Crowley said, "Angel... You didn't have to."

"I just wanted to get you something nice."

"Ngh... Should I say thank you?"

"Best not."

Crowley kissed Aziraphale's cheek and said, "Then let that stand as appreciation."

Aziraphale smiled and said, "Go ahead and try one. I'll spray air freshener."

Crowley sprayed several scents on himself and Aziraphale went to work with air freshener. He also put on some new cologne his barber recommended. Soon the musky smell was covered up.

That wasn't the last of Crowley's snakey mishaps.

Crowley tends to eat his meals large, then fast.

Aziraphale had no clue that snuggling with Crowley would help him digest his last meal faster. Aziraphale knew something was wrong when Crowley started to be a little bit more wiggly than usual. He tried to squirm out of Aziraphale's arms.

"Dear, are you alright?" Aziraphale asked without looking up from the book he was reading.

Crowley said, "You're too warm. Lemme up."

"Isn't me being warm a good thing?"

"Yeah it's a good thing except it makes me need to shit."

"Crowley we don't need to us-"

"Lemme up angel! I gotta go!"

Aziraphale let Crowley up. Crowley ran to the bathroom. He was running in such a way that made him look like he has a stick (or rather something else that rhymes with stick) up his ass.

After a while Crowley came back. He sat back down on Aziraphale's lap.

Aziraphale didn't question what happened. He didn't want Crowley to feel further embarrassed. He just let Crowley lay against his warm body as he read his book.

After that day Crowley didn't eat as normal. Usually he'd eat twice a week. 

Crowley did seem a lot more hyper though. He'd pace around the bookshop or invite Aziraphale on longer walks around the park. It was spring time, so the walks were enjoyable. After about a month of the nonstop walking Aziraphale did get tired of Crowley's behavior.

"Dear, come sit down with me," Aziraphale said to him one evening.

Crowley said, "I really don't feel like it."

Aziraphale looked at him. "S'il te plaît, Crowley."

Crowley strutted over to Aziraphale. He tried to sit still.

"Crowley is something wrong?" Aziraphale asked. Crowley shook his head no.

Aziraphale kissed Crowley's cheek and said, "I know something is wrong. You're jittery."

Crowley said, "It's nothing."

"You haven't ate."

"I'm not hungry."

"Crowley, something is wrong with you."

Crowley laid his chin on Aziraphale's shoulder and said, "Nothing is wrong with me."

"Alright," Aziraphale sighed. He picked up a book and started reading it. He didn't get much reading done. Crowley was rubbing his chin all over Aziraphale.

"Dear, you're rubbing your neck all over me."

"Aziraphale~ please~"

"Please what?"

"Please~"

Crowley crawled onto Aziraphale's lap. He kissed Aziraphale. "Please Aziraphale~"

Aziraphale asked, "Is this why you're jittery?"

Crowley rubbed his neck on Aziraphale. "I want you to have me~ Just let me! I'll do anything for you! I love you!"

Aziraphale said, "Alright. I suppose you've got me in the mood."

Crowley pushed Aziraphale down against the couch and kissed him.

From there Crowley did what snakes in spring do best.

After the spring ended Crowley became a lot less active. He went back to spending his time snuggling with Aziraphale. In the summer they went swimming together. Crowley was a rather good swimmer. He could stay under for almost half an hour.

In the fall Crowley wore scarfs and sweaters. He stayed close to Aziraphale. It helped him stay warm. He loved how warm his angel was.

In the winter Crowley slept a lot. He was hardly ever awake. His favorite sleeping place was Aziraphale. The angel's thighs and tummy were softer then pillows.

Aziraphale, as usual, spent most of the winter months reading books. He didn't mind Crowley resting against his lap. Actually, he rather enjoyed having him so close. After all he loved Crowley.

And he always would.

AN: HA I DIDN'T MAKE IT ANGST ARE YOU PROUD OF ME!! I ALMOST HAD AZIRAPHALE DIE AND SINCE SNAKES DON'T UNDERSTAND DEATH CROWLEY WOULD HAVE CONTINUED CUDDLING WITH AZIRAPHALE AS SNAKES DOOOOOO