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Chapter 42 - Coping Mechanisms

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Portal.

The word hit Athira harder than it should have. 

She dropped Shift's hand and stepped back, arms pressed to her chest as she held herself together. 

A portal. That's all she was. When the Titan's language examined her essence and stripped her down to a word, she was nothing more than that. The thing that would bring Rathe to Thols and let the reign of his Kingdom begin. A tunnel of channeled destruction. 

Her hands were trembling against her. With every vibration, Athira's hatred of the black colour lining her veins grew more than ever. It didn't seem to care what she thought of it, continuing to flicker lazily out past her skin on its own volition. 

With the knuckles of her other hand, she scraped them across her palm, trying to bury the colour out of sight but it didn't work. It never worked. Especially not now that everything was coming loose, breaking down any semblance of control she'd ever achieved to sweep her away on a tide of destruction. 

Athira threw her hands away from her, eyes to the ceiling to avoid looking at them. Even out of sight, she wanted them away, pushing them as far to the ground as she could without actually dislocating her joints. 

Something else, Thira, said Talon. Deep breaths. Look at something else. 

She tried to follow his advice, her eyes naturally gravitating to Shift. 

He still hadn't moved, more distraught than she'd ever seen him though nothing leaked past his marred features. She kept glancing at him, half expecting, half hoping that he'd look up and smile.  Tell her it didn't mean anything, that they'd find a way around it, keep trying no matter what, just like he had in the shower at the hospital, like he had after being told by Raph she might be the Herald. He'd somehow convinced her there was hope in a place everyone else said there was none. 

The silence continued, and somehow, it was worse than any prophecy or book she'd ever found. 

He believes it, she realised. These runes are unchangeable. 

Athira lowered herself down to the floor, having curled her legs under her at some point trying to evade her colour. She wanted to drop to the ground, meditate and fall into her mindscape to demand answers from Rathe itself. 

She was on the verge of doing just that when she closed her eyes, unable to find the will to keep them open any longer. What's the point? 

The point is that there's no reason to give up, said Talon. It's one word. We've had worse than that against us this whole time and this is the stone that crumbles the tower? 

It wasn't much to go on. This was just validating every other scrap of dooming information. 

One word that marks destiny, she said. One permanent word. 

That has no context, no meaning, said Talon. The confidence in his voice was undermined by his feelings, and he knew it. She could feel him grasping at any thread of logic he could create. You're assuming a lot from one word, is all I'm saying.

Reader was still casually leaning against the wall, working his fingers over the blisters on his hand as he periodically glanced between Athira and Shift. 

"Interesting, isn't it?" he said. "Most other people, you'd expect some form of denial. Anger, maybe. Athira, though? Acceptance." 

Shift looked up. "I think it'd be pretty interesting to see your reaction to your own marking, Reader." Athira watched Shift's eyes study Reader's chest, a small smirk lifting the corners of his mouth as he blinked and snorted in laughter. "Interesting indeed."

Reader raised an eyebrow. "Do feel free to share, Shift. Really, I'm all ears."

Shift's smirk grew. He shook his head. "Don't think so. Thira and I shouldn't be the only miserable ones around here."

Reader's amusement hardened into a scowl. "I could just read your mindscape, or have you forgotten?" 

"Fine," said Shift with a shrug. He held out a hand. "Read it then. I could use a laugh right about now. I wonder if your face would invent a new shade of white." 

Athira watched, expecting Reader to take the proffered hand without hesitation. Instead, Reader stared for the space of eight heartbeats during which Shift didn't move before walking down the ramp without another word. 

"That's what I thought," muttered Shift, pulling his hand back. He turned to Athira. "You okay? Considering..."

Athira sank deeper into her cowl, finding solace in the shadow. "Doesn't matter how I am. All that matters is that we know and finding Zoe."

She made to move forward, but Shift caught her by the arm. 

"It might not mean, well, that," he said after a breath of silence. "What if it's related to your colour? Because you're the first black colour, it's marking you as its affinity, sort of like Reader was saying about the pure incarnations of colour?"

Shift's voice gained confidence with every word. His fingers slid down, entwining with hers. "It makes sense with everything you can do, doesn't it? Moving through solid objects, moving other things around and people around, it's like you're creating a portal, and that's why it's covered in colour, because it's inside the portal? Even why you can get into your mindscape when no one else can!" 

Athira stared at him. 

She wanted to believe it. It made sense in a way, but part of her was holding back. It refused to be lulled into a sense of hope yet again, only to find some other piece of evidence that contradicted it later down the line. She wasn't sure how many more times she could pick up the pieces.

Better to just leave the pieces where they are and work around the fragments.  

"The problem with that is the other seven colours are common," said Athira. She dropped his hands with a final squeeze. "Even the colourless are numerous enough for the Wardens to collect them, but black?" 

She paused, trying to find the right words to explain herself. "It's just me, Shift. Me, Athira, the... child of Sin, linked to Rathe by her mindscape. Even if black is the affinity for portals, like like green is change and yellow is energy, it's only because the colour was manufactured under Rathe's purpose, nothing more. I am what I am, and no amount of hoping is going to change that."

Shift frowned. "You can't give up--"

Athira stepped back, closing her cloak around her. 

"I'm not giving up," she said. "I'll keep bashing my head against the wall prophesised to be immovable until one of us falls over, but that doesn't mean I'm going to pretend it's made of jellybeans instead of cement."

Interesting way to put it, commented Talon. 

Athira made her way down the ramp, Shift close behind. Not like there's a point pretending anymore. 

Reader had situated himself against the closest corner of a nearby building with his back to the wall, attention focused on something hidden from Athira by another structure. 

He didn't notice them approaching until Shift was a few metres away, at which point Athira was already beside him. Reader put a finger to his lips before looking back to whatever it was. 

"If Zoe's where I think she is, she won't be far," said Reader. 

"Why are you helping us?" asked Athira, keeping her voice low. "You're Rathe's fanboy, shouldn't you be rushing to meet him, not delaying the inevitable?" 

"Exactly. It's inevitable," said Reader. "Helping you now won't affect the end result, but I have a vested interest in ensuring the inevitable doesn't happen quite yet. I have a few things I'd prefer to achieve before that. It works for both of us, really." 

"Care to explain?" asked Shift, expression saying he didn't quite believe Reader's words. 

Reader shrugged. "I could, but I think you might be much more interested in a particular young lady over there," he said, gesturing to a group of people standing by a windowed wall of a room. 

The group he was referring to was three people strong. The two taller ones, one male, one female, wore iridescent suits that marked them beyond doubt as Wardens. They stood, hands behind their backs and stiff on either side of a shorter female with long, golden hair dressed in a typical blue colour suit. While she didn't seem to possess the same ease as the Wardens beside her, her shoulders were back, relaxed, like she drew a certain amount of confidence from their presence. 

Or at least, that's how Athira was reading it. 

"Are they all Wardens?" asked Shift. 

"No," said Athira. She felt like stone. "One of them is not a Warden, nor is she an Elite."

Thira, no! cried Talon. 

Athira felt him grab for the colour inside as she pulled it from her veins to her hands and strode forward. Her steps were hard on the ground, the fire inside stoked with logged fury to the roaring blaze carrying her forward to the figurehead of her hatred. 

Betrayer.

The Wardens turned. Eyes went wide and hands were raised but neither were quick enough to avoid the tendrils of colour that flicked them to the side, stripping the layer of protection from the blonde haired girl in their midst. 

Her hands, draped casually at her sides before were now curled at her chest, head following the path of the Warden's flight from her side. Blue surrounded her hands as she snapped around, fading as her eyes caught Athira approaching.

She drew breath to do what Athira hoped was scream as the Owl closed her leveled fist. 

Wrest her from her precious earth.

A band of colour formed around the girl's chest, locking her hands in place as it lifted her from the ground, feet kicking the air beneath her. 

A sputtered breath of surprise introduced the girl's first word. "A--Athira, what--"

"I'm the Owl to you, Talia." said Athira, squeezing her fist so hard the knuckles cracked. The colour bubbled up to Talia's chin. "It's not going to change now." 

Talia sneered and stretched her neck like it would give her room from the black collar brimming at her throat. "At least we're clear then, aren't we?"

"Clear as I saw you standing at ease with Wardens," said Athira. "At least now we know why you weren't in the base with the rest of us when they attacked."

Talia's scowl vanished under shock. "Wait, what? No, I didn't--"

The impending denial only fueled the fire. Whatever...this was, wasn't enough anymore. It ws too quick. Too easy for Talia to bear.

The words found their own way to Athira's lips, ripping through her teeth before she could process them.

"You betrayed them!" Athira thrust her hand to the side, shattering the binding around Talia and throwing her into the nearby wall so hard something cracked. 

She passed them off as worthless.

Thira? 

Talon's voice was nothing against the other vying for her attention. 

"Betraying me? I could understand," Athira said as she enveloped Talia's ankle and dragged her across the floor, extracting a cry of pain from the blue colour. "Me, I expected, but your team? Raph, Kione, Shift, Zoe? You handed them over like collateral damage!" 

Handed Spectrum straight to the Wardens, knowing what she did. 

Athira, don't listen to it! Don't--

Talia managed to brace herself against a wall despite her shaking. Blue colour flared to life around the hand not clutching her side and the tiles around them began to shake. 

"Still won't listen to me?" said Talia, breathy with pain. "Fine. I'll make you listen."

The tiles below Athira's feet cracked as the tremor ran through them. The earth underneath rose up, throwing Athira in the air before rapidly splitting into several smaller, fist-sized chunks. Sadly for Talia, her would-be descent was nulled by levitation and the miniature crater below remained empty. 

Black colour dripped from Athira's cloak as the first chunk flew at her head. She grabbed the rock with colour and sent it straight back at Talia, who side stepped it and increased the colour around her hands. 

More earth rose, widening the crater beneath Athira's aerial position. The chunks spun faster, circling Athira and occasionally bombarding her with a few of their number, quickly replaced by more of the outside layer. 

One managed to scrape across her bare arm, just above the rune closest to her elbow. Athira clutched it even as the colour repaired the skin in a burst of fire, invisible except for the heat inside her skin.  

The spinning rocks didn't relent as Talia shouted above them. 

"You done yet, Owl?" she asked. "I'm trying to tell you that I wasn't--"

The voice hissed inside her head. More excuses. More lies.

Another rock left Talia's dirt tornado, gravitating towards Athira. 

Enough. 

A glare turned the world black around her, detailed only in dark grey lines. The rock stopped dead inches from her face and once engulfed with colour, Talia's control was quickly untangled from its particles. It fell to the ground, lifeless once again as Athira lowered herself to stand on Talia's side of the crater, feet inches from the dropped edge. 

The elemental was talking, but Athira couldn't hear anything but the sound of blood pounding in her ears and the voice twisting through her thoughts. 

Talia seemed to notice. Her mouth snapped shut, eyes falling wide over Athira's body before two steps took her backwards, making distance that didn't matter to the tendril of black colour flooding the floor towards her. 

Her hands went up. The colour at her hands faded as she turned to run. 

It snaked around her, cutting her off. Talia summoned more earth, lifting it from the ground but Athira brought it back down, throwing Talia back into the dark void of colour gathering at her feet. 

Upon contact, the colour spread up Talia's legs, freezing her limbs in the position they were caught. It pressed a choked sound from its victims lungs, shortly followed by a sputtered breath as wild blue eyes searched for mercy in a wasteland of emotion. 

The cocoon of colour did not yield. Athira speared Talia's mind, searching for the blue flame she knew lingered within, the same she'd found in the Wardens back at their facility. It took all of two seconds. Flame located, Athira squeezed.

Talia screamed. 

The sound pierced Athira's sphere of silence, made her aware of the shouting behind her, not that it mattered. 

"You're still not special, Talia," said Athira. "You never were." 

The colour slipped away from Talia's body. Support gone, she collapsed. There was no other way to describe it. Her limbs were utterly limp, blonde hair splayed over her body in a haphazard pattern like someone had taken a vacuum to her energy pool. The only indication she was even alive was the rise and fall of her ribs and the intense look of concentration that held it all together. 

Athira let her linger in that state another moment more before she narrowed her eyes, focusing the colour on the defeated figure before her. She took hold of Talia's wrists, holding the slack joint high enough above the ground so the fingers trailed against the tiles. 

"Your earth is so precious to you?" asked Athira. She received only the same croaked noises as before. "Then it shall be your end."

She pushed Talia's hands into the ground. 

The blue colour's croaks turned to garbled words as she found the strength to struggle against Athira's grip. 

"I--I didn't, I swear, I didn't! I was trying to help, I came back and you were all gone--Shift, help me! Don't let her--"

A second shudder wracked Talia's body as Athira forced the second hand down, concealing up to her wrist under the tiles. 

"Athira!" came Shift's voice. "Athira, stop!"

Athira paid him little mind. He didn't have the stomach to put down those that would harm the Spectrum and demolish their only chance against Rathe. He couldn't possibly understand the extent of everything she endured just keep Rathe down in her mindscape, let alone do it himself, so the task fell to her. 

Warden. Gatekeeper. Guardian. Keeper of Rathe, keeper of the portal, the tunnel that linked the two worlds together. 

Athira went to push Talia further down, possibly some of her chest this time when her colour rebelled. It bucked against her, fighting her will, trying to draw Talia out of the imprisoning earth. 

I'm sorry, Athira, but we don't really have a choice here, said Talon. 

She needs to be punished, Talon! 

Not like this, Thira. Not like this. 

She didn't get the chance to form a reply as something heavy crashed into her back and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her away from Talia's form. Without the direct contact to Talia, Talon won the battle of colour and used the remaining flecks on Talia's skin to pull her hands free of the ground, meanwhile Athira, Talon still holding her colour back, struggled to get out of Shift's arms. 

"Thira, stop," said Shift, his voice right beside her ear. "Stop." 

He cradled her head with one hand, resting his cheek against the other side while still holding her back with the remaining arm she couldn't directly out-muscle. 

"She--she helped them, Shift! They took Zoe!" 

"I know, Thira," said Shift. "We're going to get her back. It's okay. Take deep breaths, listen to Talon. We're trying to help you. You need to stay in control."

Talia pushed herself up, wiping the sweat off her face with the back of a hand and scraping together what remained of her dignity. 

"You're still going to 'Thira' her?" said Talia. "After all that, what she just did?" 

"You," growled Shift, pulling Athira tighter as she lunged. "Stay down unless you want Athira to blow your head off." 

"Oh, right," said Talia, sarcasm dripping like the blood on her lips. "Because it's all about her, despite the fact she's clearly insane and is going to get us all killed."

"We considered you family, Talia!" said Shift. "All of us! Raph, Zoe, Kione--you've only been with us half a year, but you were one of us, so why!" 

"What?" Something clicked into incredulous on Talia's face. "You think I got you all kidnapped, is that it?" 

"Other reasons why you were standing freely with Wardens either side of you elude me, to be completely honest." 

Talia attempted to stand, wincing as she did so. She held the side which she'd landed on earlier before managing to straighten. 

"Here's an idea," she said, jabbing a spare finger at the air. "How about that I came down here to try and rescue you all, including that nutcase who just attacked me, or is that still not good enough?" 

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A/N - A wild Talia appears! Talia used Dig! It's not very effective...

Vote/Comment! <3 Indigo reached #6 adventure last update, and for that, I'll love you guys forever. Much happy, such prance. ^-^