Bucky found his Wednesday lunch friend the next morning outside shouting at his neighbour. Voices echoing from the entrance of the alley where they were standing. The man sighed as he went closer to break up the fight. He had been taking a walk before lunch, Basil at work and Henry meeting his agent. When Basil had decided to follow Bucky back to America, the ginger cousin he had brought with him was a surprise. Bucky had brief memories of the ginger man back during the break up of the avengers, and again before the snap. Still, the distant relative of Basil's had moved with him and stuck around in their life like a gum in hair. Months later and Bucky still wasn't quite sure what to make of him. (That the author and seemingly retired spy was here had been a surprise that Bucky was still getting used too. One spy and assassin to another. Did Basil have some sort of signal that attracted heroes and spies? It wouldn't surprise him if he did).

"Whoa Yori", he greeted the elderly Japanese man who lived in their apartment block. "What's going on? I thought we were going to have lunch". He rested a comforting hand on the man's shoulder as he tried to diffuse the situation.

Yori was glaring at a young man from the first floor. "Unique is putting his trash in my trash".

"It's trash!" Unique exclaimed. (Was it unique? Bucky swore that he recalled Basil complaining about the name once or twice).

"And the time has come for me to smack his-" Yori lunged but Bucky stepped between them and gently caught his arm.

"Whoa. Hang on". He began steering Yori away from the young hipster dude.

Unique didn't seem to get the message and went for a hand shake. "Hey man. I'm Unique. Its like Monique but it's got a U in there for Uniqueness". (Ah that was the stupid name he remembered. Basil had sniggered at it. "If you want a unique name, then make one up. Don't just name yourself unique. That's just lazy and cringey". Bucky didn't really know what cringey meant but he gathered that it was bad).

What was that word Basil and Henry used often? Oh yeah, Twat. Bucky thought that this guy looked like a twat. "That's absurd!" Yori huffed as he walked away down the alley. Bucky went after him.

"Yori, you can't keep on fighting with your neighbours. Come on let's get some food". Yori waved him off. "But it's Izzy. We always go to Izzy's on Wednesdays".

"I'm not in the mood today".

"What if we make Henry pay?"

That made the old man pause. He turned around with a frown. "Where is the English gentleman anyway?"

"He texted to say that he's late because he's meeting his agent. I'll pay if he doesn't turn up", Bucky found himself promising. He hoped that Henry would turn up. The other man had more money than him. (So did Basil. But that was to be expected. He'd always had more money than Bucky and the blue eyed man was glad for it).

"Alright but no talking", Yori grumbled. Bucky allowed himself a small smile as the little old man came back and led the way.

Izzy was only a block a away but during the time it took to get there and get seated, grey clouds had covered the sky outside. Rain and thunder was covering the streets by the time their food was served. Henry came in with a black umbrella protecting his button-up and sweater vest. He shook it off and came to join them at the sushi bar, one hand pushing back windswept hair. Yori brightened up at this.

"Sorry I am late. My agent kept on raving about book tours. What did you all order?"

"You're paying", Bucky announced to him through a mouthful of dragon roll. Around them, the sushi bar was filling up with people trying to avoid the rain.

Henry scowled at him. "Nice to see you too Barnes. I hope you didn't order the most expensive thing on the menu". Though Bucky had not been friends with Henry long, the man's dry wit and calm was familiar. He was another man bred in violence and secrets, just like most of their shared acquaintances and friends. Bucky had recognised it the first time they had met and it was as familiar to him as a style of coat. He could almost say they were friends. Almost, begrudgingly. Friendly acquaintances at most. 

"I was just about to say that they were straying from their usual", Leah, who had been serving them every Wednesday for over two months now, greeted as she set more sushi down for them. "What will you be having?"

"Just some tempura for now please", Henry replied as Bucky and Yori began eating. "You two couldn't wait for me?"

"We were hungry", Yori stated as he picked up a newspaper. He always read the newspaper during lunch. "Look", he gestured at an article. "No one made it past ninety this week".

"So young", Bucky shook his head. If Basil was here, he would be sniggering. (Sense of humour still that of the nineteen year old he was when they had first met. Only now just darker and more bitter. But still, ridiculous). 

"Easy for you to say old man", Henry grinned at him. Bucky flipped him the bird and the ginger laughed.

"How old are you anyway?" Leah rejoined the conversation as she handed Henry his food.

"A hundred and six".

"His boyfriend is a hundred and three", Henry added with a smile. She looked at them both for a second before laughing and moving on to her other customers. Henry chuckled and took a sip of his beer.

"How is your boyfriend?" Yori voiced. "Still a doctor?"

"Yeah. Basil is still working at the free clinic". Bucky found it easier to talk about Basil. It was more free in a way. Basil was so bright that it never felt hard to talk about him. Sometimes it was terrifying to remember that he had ever forgotten him. How one could forget someone like basil, it seemed impossible until he recalled that he'd actually been forced to. (Those were some of the worst nightmares. Basil in the helicarrier dying in his arms, or him falling through the sky, or him disappearing into dust. And sometimes, rarely, him back in in the forties. The bullet hitting his chest and him going down and this time not getting back up again. Sometimes he thought Basil was a dream he had created, because how could someone like him exist?)

"Good job, doctor". Yori nodded with a grunt. Bucky smiled slightly.

"Yeah, though he does scare me sometimes", Henry added. "He can't help but work though. Workaholic. You know between Ultron and Germany, he was working as a paramedic. Before then he was a shield employed doctor for the avengers".

"He can't help but help people", Bucky hummed in agreement. Henry nodded and picked up his chopsticks.

"So? When do I get to meet him? Two months we have been doing this and I have yet to meet this mysterious Basil". Yori gestured with his chopsticks before pausing with a thoughtful look. "How long have you been together again?"

"We meet in late nineteen forty three. Didn't get together until over a year later though-" down the bar, someone had placed a plate with red bean mochi. Yori froze and Bucky stopped speaking. "Yori?What's wrong?" His tone was soft as he placed a hand on the man's back. On Yori's other side, Henry had also paused.

"My son", Yori had paused for a long moment before his spoke, voice sliding into Japanese. "He loved the red bean mochi". Bucky and Henry shared a look. Neither man needing to translate the sentence. They both knew the language. 

Yori blinked and seemed to gather himself. "Um", he stuttered in English. "He had a job with a consulting company. He was working abroad and he was killed". He didn't need to expand on it. Bucky could see the events playing out in his mind. A long ago memory. "The police said 'wrong place wrong time' but I will never know what really happened. I felt it was strange". Yori placed a hand to his chest. "In here". 

Bucky turned and caught Henry's eye. The ginger watching him curiously but with a knowing glint. He sometimes forgot that Henry was with Basil during the breakdown of the avengers and the subsequent release of all of the Winter Soldier's crimes. (The whole thing had been so chaotic that it had been hard to focus). Henry knew why Bucky was here. Here every week getting sushi with Yori. Out of all of them, he wondered if the author could relate the most. There was a sense of shared sadness mixed in with curiosity too. Henry did not know the circumstances to how Bucky had killed Yori's son. He just knew he did. 

Bucky stuffed another piece of sushi in his mouth as Henry changed the subject to a news headline in the paper. The author engaging Yori into small talk that brought the old man back to the present and seemed to lighten the deep grief on his face. Still, Bucky felt it in his chest. Turmoil of guilt and shame and fear. If Basil was here he knew that the other would be able to read it off him. 

"You cannot hold yourself accountable for the things you did as The Soldier", Basil had told him one night when things were too heavy and he had found himself at the other's door. "It's simple. It will break you and I don't want you broken. You can morn it, grieve the lives lost but you cannot blame yourself for an impossible situation Sarge. You were not you. You were unaware of it". He had taken his hands. Sleep rumbled and so warm and cosy that the very touch had made Bucky relax.

 "You do not blame a child for saying something rude when they do not know that it is rude. You cannot blame someone for ignorance. If someone chooses to stay ignorant when they are offered knowledge then there is blame. But you were offered knowledge and you fought for it Sarge. You cannot blame yourself for being ignorant and under their control. You can only blame the ones who used you". He had smiled then and Bucky would never grow tired of it. "I do not blame you for anything you did before you remembered. You can grieve it Bucky. Feel sorrow and anger but don't feel blame for the actions of others. If we all did that then we would break". 

Bucky let those words turn over in his mind again, for the thousandth time. A reminder and a reassurance, and felt the weight in his chest lessen slightly. He took another roll and chewed on it as Yori laughed at something next to him. He tuned back into the conversation and felt a smile rise as Henry made a terrible impersonation of a tv presenter. The ginger grinning as Yori gestured at him with his chopsticks. Bucky laughed through the ever present weight in his chest and tried to let it become apart of the background. 

unedited 

I know this chapter took a while. Hope you enjoyed it. I will try to update this more often.