so have some more incorrect quotes!

i h a t e m y s e l f 

once again, i just replaced the names from Incorrect-ego-quotes tumblr go check them out its very entertaining

PIpit= Trianglepaw

ok here we go

~~once again, cursing warning + some suggestive jokes but im sure most of you dont give a crap so bye~~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

police sirens 

Lila, who's never done anything wrong in their entire life: they've found me 

 Chaos, the one who actually committed the crime: you'd better run

Pipit: if a spider makes silk then a pider must make ilk 

 Acatin: geT OUT-

Amber: okay. we'll need to break in through a side door, but be subtle- 

Foxglove: got it! proceeds to kick the door 

Amber: that's not subtle-

Aisha: being the leader of this group, is like being a parent. 

Aisha: if you were wondering what it's like being in the group of Acatin's Egos – Chaos and Foxglove got in a screaming match over the rules for the quiet game.

Amber, to the tune of Old McDonald: i'm so stressed that sunlight hurts, i am god's mistake!

Pipit: what's for lunch? 

JD: oh, i already ate. 

 Pipit: without me?  

JD: sorry, i was hungry! want me to bring you something? what do you want? 

 Pipit, backing away into the shadows: loyalty.

Pipit: Acatin, Marvin's on the table again! 

 Acatin, sighing: he knows he's not supposed to be up there

Pipit, squirting Marvin with a spray bottle: bad magician! 

 Marvin: [hisses]

Pipit: Who the fuck- 

Acatin: Language! 

 Pipit: Whomst the fuck- 

 Acatin: No!

JD: at this point, we aren't just flirting with disaster. 

Pipit: we're rounding third base and asking if disaster has any condoms. 

JD and Pipit: [chaotic evil high five]

Lila: i don't like confrontation because i've never been in a fight before. i don't give off that vibe, you know? 

Lila, pointing to Aisha: some people give off a certain vibe right away, like, 'don't fuck with me!' 

Lila: my vibe is more like 'hey, you could pour soup in my lap and i'd probably apologize to you'

Foxglove: Aisha gave me an envelope, and she said i should only open if the other egos and i ever had an emergency and wanted to ask her for money. 

 Chaos: open it, open it! 

 Lila: i hope it's a million dollar bill! 

 Amber: i bet it's a Swiss bank account number! 

 Foxglove: [opens it] 

 Amber: ...well, what does it say? 

 Foxglove: [shows them a paper with 'NO' in all caps]

Pipit: i'm having salad for dinner. 

Pipit: well, fruit salad. 

Pipit: actually, it's mostly grapes... 

Pipit: okay, it's all grapes... fermented grapes! 

Everyone, confused: ... 

 Pipit, ashamed: it's wine. i'm having wine for dinner.

Acatin: i'm too tired to talk to you right now 

 Pipit: you're too young to be that tired 

 Acatin: and you're too old to still be alive, yet here we are

Foxglove: Parkour, bi-atches! runs across the top of the playground, tripping and flipping several times before face planting in woodchips 

 Alice: watching from a room full of surveillance screens Jesus Christ, it's Jason Bourne.

Pipit: you ever think about how milk was like, discovered? 

Pipit: who looked at a cow's udders and thought "i want to drink that."? 

Acatin: ... 

Acatin: are you okay–

Chaos: i know 200 ways to kill a man. 

 Amber: you could glue an open jar of rats to his face then blowtorch the other side of the jar so the rats have to eat their way out through his face to escape the heat. 

 Chaos, slightly surprised: 201.

Lila: gets a paper cut 

 Aisha: kicking through the door OH MY GOD LILA ARE YOU OK??? WHO HURT YOU?? SOMEBODY 'BOUT TO CATCH THESE H A N D S

Chaos: handcuffs? wow, you're kinky! 

 Foxglove: first off, i'm a superhero, and secondly, you're being placed under arrest.

Literally anyone: Are you taken? 

 Aisha: Yeah, for granted

Pipit and JD: and now for an ego update from The Acatin Group. 

 Acatin's Egos, holding up weapons and knives: we still hate both of you and wish to end your lives. 

 Pipti and JD: thank you, Acatin's Egos, and now to the weather!

JD: good morning, cruel world. 

 Pipit: isn't the saying, "goodbye, cruel world"? 

 JD: this world may be cruel, but i'm still kickin'.

THATS IT FOR RIGHT NOW BUT ILL BE BACK LATER

WOO

thank you for coming to my tedtalk bye