Kyran: Whenever teddy lupin spends time in muggle london, random strangers will go up to him and ask him where he goes to get his hair dyed bc "it just looks so authentic!" and he just smiles and says "my mum"
Alec: and then you remember that his mum is dead and you cry

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Alec: if opposites attract why aren't hot people attracted to me
Evan: the obvious logic here is that you're hot
Alec: thats the most encouraging yet depressing thing i've ever heard

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Celeste: Effective feminism is realizing that every struggle is not your own and that you can't always relate.
Elijah: You can always provide support and solidarity,
Elijah: But sometimes you just gotta realize,
Elijah: its not about you right now.

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Evan: I got catcalled while I was walking the other day and I couldn't think of anything clever to say so I just made the most hideous shrieking sound I possibly could.
Evan: I heard the guys in the car go "the fuck?"
Alec: no, this is good, let's do this

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Kyran: My mom just accidentally prematurely sent an email to an accounting firm, it was supposed to say "I am afraid that we will have to postpone our meeting"
Kyran: but she hit send when all it said was
Kyran, high pitched: Hi Jim,
Kyran, still high pitched: I am afraid
Alec: mood

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Evan: standing next to sunflowers always makes me feel weak like "look at this fucking flower. this flower's taller than me. this flower is winning and I'm losing."
Alec: wow, you are not ready to hear about trees.

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Evan: The nurse gave me some valium before my surgery so i wouldn't have a panic attack when they tried to put me under and just when it was starting to kick in, I met my anesthesiologist, who told me I have the same name as his kid and I just nodded thoughtfully and said "we must battle so I can become the alpha" and my dad nearly fell out of his chair he was laughing so hard

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Alec: I'd really like to be taken out I'm not gonna lie to y'all. Whether it's in a date way or a sniper way I have no preference.