I knew my time was done. I couldn't take this pain anymore. The constant pressuring voices of Him in my head. The never ending agony. The torment. The torture. The suffering. It all had to stop right now. I had just done a sinful act that I couldn't undo or reverse back. It was all my fault. I can just let go. Give in. I have to do it. For the greater good. I have to. I can't let anybody else get hurt just because of this. I am a monster; a slave of Him. I no longer deserve to walk this earth. Too wicked of a person I am. Too hateful and despicable. I will become one with Him and I will end this living hell.

I have to do it.

And I will.