Whoa, you stress me out, you kill me
You drag me down, you fuck me up
We're on the ground, we're screaming
I don't know how to make it stop
I love it, I hate it, and I can't take it
But I keep on coming back to you

- Back to you, Louis Tomlinson, Bebe Rexah

27| Evelyn (Part 1)

"You have been out with him for two days ditching us all and you still want me to believe, that you guys ain't dating," Rita asked cocking her head to one side, giving Evelyn an obvious look.

"I told you the truth, believing or not believing is up to you." Evelyn shrugged as she put another fry in her mouth. They were again sitting in the bleachers, out of the cafeteria.

"No really, you two were gone without any message and don't ask me what Jack said about it." Rita said as she bit on her sandwich.

"Nobody asked." Evelyn said being horrified. Jack's assumption was always foul.

"I don't see. What's the problem with dating him?" Rita asked.

Evelyn sighed, "I am not looking for a boyfriend right now. And also, he thinks relationships are waste of time which I totally agree with."

Rita gave her a credible look.

"What else do you two agree on?" She asked.

"Nothing else actually, we are always fighting. Even in the morning, we fought about pizza flavors. C'mon, tell me, is pineapple pizza even a pizza?" Evelyn asked.

"Where did you go?" Rita said

"We went to his friends house. More specifically his dad's friends house," Evelyn said finishing the last fry. She looked at the hot dog that was lying by the side. It looked absolutely horrible with no sauce, just bread and meat.

"He took you to his dad's friend house," Rita repeated, " Evelyn, you sure you ain't clueless?"

"What is wrong with him taking me to their house?" Evelyn said scrunching up her nose at the hot dog.

"Mason never really let people in. After his parents died, he doesn't even let us close and then he takes you to his dad's friends house." Rita put her hands on her hips. "Can't you see it? Isn't it quite obvious?"

Evelyn gave Rita a look. "Are you trying to tell me...."

"Do I need to scream on your face?" Rita asked back.

Evelyn scratched her neck. How was that even possible? She remembered Saturday night, when he hugged her. It was all warm and fuzzy and she didn't want to pull out from him immediately and then Mady arrives out of nowhere and...

"Nah, he never made it seem like that," Evelyn said dismissing the idea. "He tells me almost everything. He would've told me."

Rita sighed. "You should see the way he looks at you."

Evelyn rolled her eyes.

"What about you?" Rita smiled and poked on her shoulder.

"What about me?" Evelyn said moving her feet.

"You don't like him?" Rita asked.

"Huh, me liking him?" Evelyn laughed, "You have to be joking."

"Oh really?" Rita asked smiling.

"Of course. Why would I even like him? He's a nerd, way too nice and a jerk, he is cocky and so full of himself. At the same time, he is boring. I am telling you, he is no fun." Evelyn shook her head.

Rita gave a half smile. She snickered, "Yet, he is the one you will spend all your time with."

"No, I don't." Evelyn said.

"Who were you with yesterday?" Rita asked.

"Okay you know I was out with him. You can't.."

"Fine, the day before yesterday?" Rita asked.

"That's also out of counting," Evelyn reasoned.

"The day before that," Rita said.

"He had a fight, so he was down, he had punishment, I can't leave him all alone." Evelyn said.

"Okay, what about this morning?" Rita said.

Evelyn stared at her.

"Umm, I mean, we are good friends," Evelyn said.

"Oh yeah," Rita said.

"Look, you are new here. You haven't made much friends, but him, he had been here all the time. Yet, he is spending all his time with you." Rita said. "You still gonna deny, that he likes you."

Evelyn shifted uncomfortably. As if on cue, she heard her name, "Evelyn!"

She looked around. Mason was standing in front of the hallway. He smiled looking at her. Then he was coming down towards the bleacher. Looking at him, Evelyn's stomach flipped.

"Talk of the devil and the devil appears," Evelyn murmured under her breathe.

She looked at Rita who cocked her head to the side and gave her a 'I told you' look.

"Look at that smile. It's like he had found the most precious thing in the world." Rita said shaking her head. Evelyn sighed.

"Where's your fries?" Mason asked standing by the bleachers.

"I ate them," Evelyn said. Rita was watching them like a hawk.

"You ate them?" Mason asked. "Since when do you finish your lunch?"

"Since today." Evelyn shrugged. "So what?"

Mason stroked his chin, "Good, but what's I'm gonna eat then?"

"What am I to you? Your supplier of lunch?" Evelyn asked narrowing her eyes.

"Nope. I mean yes, in a way." Mason gave a guilty smile.

Evelyn grimaced. "Take from Rita's." She looked away.

"That won't be the same as taking yours." Mason said as a matter of fact. "Right, Rita?"

"Oh you finally saw there is someone else sitting here. Congrats Mason!" Rita said as she looked at Evelyn, giving her another obvious look.

"And also I totally agree with you. It won't be the same stealing mine." Rita said shaking her head affirmatively.

Evelyn looked at Mason, scrutinizing her eyes, as he rolled his eyes. "Hey Mason."

"Yeah?" Mason asked.

"You've been here so long, don't you like anyone around here?" Evelyn blurted out.

Rita gaped at her.

"What do you mean, if I like anyone around here?" Mason said wiggling his eyebrow.

"You know, I mean like-like. Do you like any girl from our school or any other school?" Evelyn asked tapping her fingers on her thigh.

Mason laughed a little, "Why are you suddenly interested about my love life?"

He looked at Rita and then at Evelyn.

"Nah, I was just wondering, you know in general, as a friend, " Evelyn said fiddling with her hair.

Mason gave her a look. "I think Louise told you enough about that. And," Mason smiled, "You have been wondering about my dating life?"

Evelyn curled her fingers into a fist, "It's not like that, it's I mean, I was just curious." Evelyn looked away.

"Okay," Mason said taking one step back. "That was weird."

"Just leave." Evelyn said looking away.

Mason shrugged before turning and walking away.

Rita was still gaping at Evelyn.

"What now?" Evelyn snapped, "See, he doesn't really like anyone."

"He neither said no, nor yes. He cleverly avoided your question." Rita said looking satisfied.

Evelyn narrowed her eyes as she played the conversation back in her head.

Then she felt someone's hand on her shoulder and she jerked up in surprise. It was Mason again.

"I just came in again to remind you, ice cream after school, remember?"

"Of course, I do." Evelyn gave an obvious look.

"Okay, great!" He left.

Rita was smiling like she had own a lottery.

"Ice cream after school? Is that a daaaaaaate?" She suggested in her fangirl voice.

"No it's not. It's kind of our thing. We go there often after school and do our homeworks and stuffs." Evelyn said casually.

"Ooh. Ice cream after school casually!" Rita cooed.

"Shut up." Evelyn said and stared at her hot dog, deciding whether to toss it in a bin or on Rita's face.

"It is quite obvious. But I guess you chose not to see it." Rita said this time with her face serious.

"It's just.." Evelyn's heart beat fastened for no reason at all. "He's like a good friend and the last thing I want is awkwardness and that sexual tension among us. So even thought he does act like maybe he..."

Rita smiled.

"Stop smiling. I didn't say anything." Evelyn complained.

"You guys are just so cute together, I can't help it." Rita beamed at her. Evelyn gulped.

"You are so not peer pressuring me into a relationship," Evelyn stated.

"Of course, I am not. I just want my ship to sail." Rita shook her head.

"About me and Mason, I like it the way it is now. And I will love to keep it that way. Your ship is gonna drown" Evelyn said.

"Don't wanna know my ship's name?" Rita said.

"Nope." Evelyn shook her head.

"It's Mavelyn. Sounds cute." Rita said.

"Don't think so." Evelyn said with a hard face.

Mavleyn. What a weird name. She thought.

• • •

About me and Mason, I like it the way it is now. And I will love to keep it that way.

Evelyn's own words played again and again inside her head. Evelyn knew the moment Rita brought it up Evelyn was done. Now she would overthink it. She would mess everything up, just like everything else.

She started thinking about what they did daily. Mason came over at her house everyday to pick her up and drive her to school.

That sounds suspiciously like what a boyfriend would do.

Best friends does that as well.

They always sit together in classes which is normal for friends to do as well. Then they would have lunch in library cause none of them like to be in the crowded cafeteria among all the gossips and shouts. So they ditch their friends and stay in the library.

Doesn't sound romantic at all.

So after school they go to either their hiding place or that ice cream shop, or that fast food shop to do homeworks.

Casual.

And then Mason would drop her home. They would talk in phone occasionally. Mostly he would call up when he's bored.

Normal. Nothing fancy.

Good. All checked.

And then....

There we go again.

And then you two will always hold hands when you walk and he would say one or two weird obvious things and you would roll your eyes out just to change the subject or ease out the tension. And let's not forget about how tightly he hugged you last night.

Well it was not that bad.

And you liked it.

No, not at all. Not that way for sure.

"Hey, hey," Evelyn felt someone shaking her. "I think I lost you."

Mason stood there with his chocolate brown hair all tousled, his blue eyes sparkling in sunlight. His gaze fixated on Evelyn as they stood on the sidewalk.

"Were you even listening to me?" Mason asked hopelessly.

"Yes, of course, I was." Evelyn said gulping. She could feel her stomach tighten in knots, her heart beats rising and her skin prickling.

Great, just great.

"What's that you thinking about?"

"Nothing absolutely nothing at all. Nothing that will interest you boring stuff." Evelyn said a little too quickly. Mason scrutinized at her.

I am gonna mess this up real bad.

"Stomach knots?" Mason asked suddenly.

Evelyn jolted hearing that word.

"You haven't eaten not even a bite of that ice cream." Mason said looking over at the ice cream.

Okay, so he knew about the stomach knots and the break downs and the ups and downs of mood several times a day.

I will go crazy. I need to stop thinking.

"So when I..., Evelyn?" Mason asked and Evelyn and again came to her senses.

Mason took a few steps towards her and checked her forehead, "You sure you're fine?"

No I'm dying. That's because of you.

Take for example. Why did he have blue eyes? Why do they have to be this deep blue shade like really unique?

Why did he had dimples when he smiled? Why his hair was always messy? Why he had muscles but not that much that he would look bulky? Why he had to be so nice with me?

And it went on and on.

He could've been a little less attractive and a little more jerk and that it wouldn't be a problem. But no, he had to look good so that he could mess everything up with that ridiculously gorgeous face of his.

Okay. No, I had to stop.

"Is there anything in my face?" Mason asked looking amused and confused at the same time.

"No, no, why there would be anything?" Evelyn said being startled.

"You've been staring for too long. Not that I have a problem." Mason said and winked.

There. He just did it. He needs to stop.

"And I don't have any problem staring at your face either," Mason added running a hand through his hair.

Nice soft looking hair that made Evelyn wanted to...

Noononononono.

"By the way," Evelyn just realized he had been standing too close since he checked her forehead. "You smell too good, like Vanilla."

Other time, Evelyn would have rolled her eyes and better punch his arms or maybe in his face. But then at the moment, she dead stared at him and flushed from head to toe.

"I was not supposed to say that aloud, was I?" Mason said himself and shook his head.

Evelyn cleared her throat.

Good job Evelyn. You have ruined the only good friend you have over here.

Mason scratched the back of his head and Evelyn took two steps forward while still feeling the heat radiating out of her skin. Mason soon caught up and tried to start a conversation but somehow it didn't work. He trailed off halfway and he was thinking something on his own.

This can't be happening. We can't seriously be like this.

Already depending on him now, are we?

No, I am not depending on him. I don't want to lose him. This is so complicated.

You know exactly where it leads. It's leading that way already.

Can I just stop this brain for one second?

He already knows about you, cares about you, and he's nice and ..

Evelyn cleared her throat loudly. Mason looked up being confused.

I can just kill him. All problem solved.

But you won't.

Argh!

"You look stressed out," Mason commented. "We can talk if you want."

Evelyn's brain didn't stop. So she started fuming and planning how she's going to kill Rita first thing next morning.

At one point, she couldn't take it anymore. She stopped. She took a few deep breathe while still fuming with anger.

Then she charged at Mason. Grabbing his collar, Evelyn said exclaimed, "You! You listen to me very clearly."

"Yes, I am listening," Mason said with a serious face.

"I want to do this on my own. I already told you several times. You can be my friend and be here when I lose my mind but you can make me all dependent on you. If I fall, you can't do anything about it. I will fall, I will crouch and I will stand up on my own two feet. I want to fight this alone. Or else it would make me feel I'm weak and dependent on others. I will hate that."

"Okay," Mason replied. "I get it."

There was something in his eyes.

Pride. He was proud of her?

Evelyn wished she didn't read that wrong.

"You can let go of me now, I guess." Mason said abruptly.

Evelyn blushed deeply.

This is going nowhere.

~~~

Author's note: An update on Saturday? yeps. I couldn't update on Thursday so I made up. Chapter 27 ( Part 2) Will be updated on Thursday. Brace yourself for it. You need it. We are going deep.

anyways if I had chapter title, I would have named it "Overthinking Extreme: Starter Pack" . Sounds cool, doesn't it?

Until Next Chap. Don't drown in too deep.