"Willowwwww." I hear Mathea's voice from the other side of the door, and I wait for her to barge into my room.

She looks more happy than usual, and a huge smile has taken over her face.

"What do you want?" I say, smiling at my sister as I do so.

"You should spend time with me. I know your workload will grow a lot, so the best time is now. We can watch a movie."

I won't describe Mathea as an attention seeker, but she is the happiest when she receives it. I know she is right; she's correct to believe my workload will grow.

In previous years, we'd get into an argument about how often I brush her off, but the argument was never serious. Mathea would frown as she attempted to make herself cry, hoping her displeased expression would convince me to put down my books or stop training for us to spend more time together. It rarely worked, but I occasionally gave in to her requests. I do like spending with her. Honestly, I enjoy her presence more than many. It just seems that are schedules clash.

"Don't tell me about work, Willow." Mathea frowns. "Okay, maybe you'll be a little behind, but you'll catch it up in no time."

"I don't have work, T. Come here." I pat on the space on my bed, motioning for Mathea to sit next to me. I completed my Studies' work for the day after classes ended. As for my Gifted classes; they only begin tomorrow.

Mathea then throws her body towards me and wraps her arms around me. I laugh as she does this, remembering how I once teased her for her short arms and tiny hands. There's no problem with them. I only like teasing her to see her reaction. She often laughs in response, but there has been times when she would insult me back. There have been rare occasions where she would choose to leave my presence; hurt that I'd go 'too far'.

My mother once told me to be nicer to my sister, but when I brought this up with Mathea; she warned me off it. Mathea likes the banter between us.

"What are we going to watch?"

"What genre are you in the mood for?" I ask Mathea, spitting out a strand of her hair that has just fallen into my mouth. "Get off me."

"We can watch an action movie," Mathea laughs as she lifts her weight off of me and sits on the spot I previously motioned to, "or we can watch a comedy. Maybe a romance? You pick."

"I don't mind any."

"Ugh, I'll just ask Dawn."

"You'll ask Dawn?" I give my sister a hesitant look as she brings up her friend's name.

"I told her I'll ask you to join us. She and I were talking about watching it in the lounge."

"You know I don't like your friend," I say, remembering the time Dawn shoved me out of her way in the hallway, and I was slammed into the wall.

It doesn't matter that it didn't hurt. It's just rude to do that. It makes me even more angry when I remember how beautiful she is; she's a dark skinned girl with a broad nose and freckles covering the width of it. She's also short and has red hair. She dyed it recently.

"You met her when she was having a bad day. Anyway, you don't have to talk to her, Wills, we're only watching a movie. We can watch Haunted."

"I don't like horrors."

"It's actually a comedy," Mathea then coughs and mutters under her breath, "you wimp."

"Did you say something?" I raise my eyebrows, and Mathea does the same, pretending to be confused by my question.

"Hmm." We remain silent for some time, only staring at each other as if to challenge the other to say something else.

Mathea then laughs as she jumps off my bed, taking my arm in her hand and attempting to pull me off of my bed. I laugh with her.

"T, I'll just join you there. I want to sleep for a while. My work drained my energy." I also feel a slight pain in my head, but I won't tell her that.

Mathea looks to the books scattered on the table near my window and the empty packets of snacks thrown on my floor.

"I'll join you later," I state, needing to reassure my sister as she groans.

"Fineee. I'm going to Kane's house to ask if he wants to join as well."

"Send him a message."

"I did, but he never answered. Okay, I'll see you later, Wills."

Mathea walks over to my room door, and I only notice now that she never closed it when she entered. She nears the door and just as one foot steps out of my room, Mathea turns around to face me.

"What is it?" I can tell there's something on Mathea's mind, and this time, I'm sure I won't have to drag the answer out of her.

Mathea looks as if she's about to explode if she does not speak her mind at this moment.

"What's going on, Wills?" Mathea sighs.

I don't have to ask her what she means. She must be talking about my lack of progress at this program. I should've known she wouldn't remain silent regarding this issue.

I only hope she never mentioned this problem to my mother or father. Surely, the program facilitators would have alerted them about my lack of progress, but I don't need Mathea telling them about that specific conversation with the doctor. The problem may seem larger than it is to know a doctor, who should not have said a word to me about my possible dismissal from the program, told me about the issue.

"It's nothing, Mathea. You shouldn't worry." I lower my body to lay on my back, sighing as I think about how much this issue must be bothering Mathea. She probably thought about this all night.

"Is there anything I don't know?" I hear Mathea's footsteps moving closer to me, and I close my eyes as I feel my sister's body standing over me. She makes no movement to sit on the bed.

"Like what, Mathea? It happens. Go watch a movie with Dawn."

Mathea doesn't answer me for some time, and, considering that my eyes are closed, I'll have to rely on her tone of voice to determine how she feels.

"I just want you to stay in this program with me, and I see how they treat the other boy who was dismissed."

"I'll be fine, T. I'll ask for more training, okay? I'll be right here with you."

"Remember when Mum used to force you to take me everywhere? You hated it." Mathea's laugh sound strained, but it often sounds that way when something's bothering her.

I stand up from my bed, causing Mathea to take a few steps away from me. I then hold her head and place a kiss on her forehead.

"I still hate it," I lie.

"You're not that fun to be around anyway," Mathea laughs as she addresses me.

"I'll be alright. I'll get better, and I'll stay here with you, wierdo." In this moment, I actually hope my words are true.

Mathea crunches her face and lightly pushes me away, but a smile appears on her face.

"I'm going, but join us later. Dawn actually likes you, you know?"

"I'll join if Kane goes."

"I'll drag him here!"

I laugh as my sister turns away from me and walks through the door. I have enough motivation to get better, but Mathea is ranked first. Of course, I won't tell her I want to get better for her. I can't say how that will happen, but there must be something.

Perhaps I'll talk to that passionate doctor about ways she believes I could get better. She'll be happy that I'm showing how bad I 'want it'; she'll be happy that I'm showing how bad I want a life in this program.

I hear my phone make a buzzing sound and throw my pillows and duvet on the floor in search of the device. I read a notification from Kane asking if I'll be joining Mathea for the movie. He must've seen Thea's message, so that will save Thea from having to walk all the way to his boarding house.

I quickly type in the response I gave Mathea; I tell Kane that I'll go if he does. This is mainly so, if the movie happens to be boring, there will be someone there to entertain me.

I receive his reply in an instant; stating he wants to relax with 'the boys' so he'll see us tomorrow. Mathea won't be too pleased, but I know she won't bother him much.

I begin to think about Kane's grades at this program in both Studies and Gifted classes. He's doing well at this program as if it were made for him. Perhaps, despite his beliefs, he can tell me how to stay in the program. Well, not necessarily stay, rather provide advice on how to improve my gift. Maybe I could even convince him to train with me when classes officially end.

I'll ask him this tomorrow. For now, I will take a nap and join Mathea in the lounge once I wake up.

I've been dreaming lately. Well, considering I've been told that everyone dreams, I suppose it's better to say I've been remembering my dreams lately.

I dream of a world entirely different from how my world should be; I dream of a world where everything hurts. Sometimes, everything hurts so bad that I never want to dream again, but I think I prefer dreaming; there's hope in the imagined world. I like to nap for that reason; hope.  That and I've been unbelievably tired.