Chapter 19: Choices
Eve's office is large. Unlike many of the offices I've seen here, it isn't made out of glass, so no one will be able to see me during my treatment. However, Eve's office is large enough to have a smaller glass room built into it. I assume I'll be in there for my treatment.
"This is my first time treating someone with your gift," Eve says as she hands me a blue pill to swallow.
"You call it a gift?" I ask, surprised a Purus member would use this word to describe it.
"What better way to describe a talent bestowed on you by the mysteries of this world?"
"Why fight us then? Why develop a cure for people who aren't sick?"
"A gift such as yours, Ms Bare, although remarkable, is unnatural and a danger to society. There must be a limit to what humans can do. This barrier is what divides us from the gods. The Gifted disrupt the order of it all."
Order; that's what this is all about. So many lives lost to restore order. I wonder who decided the balance of things anyway; deciding where humans should stand amongst nature and all things supernatural. However, I won't discuss any of this with Eve. I know her kind; nodding their head to give others a false sense of understanding, yet too stubborn to change a belief engulfed in so much wrongdoings.
"I've read all the files on others with your condition. Although you will be working exclusively with me, I have organized a team of doctors to look into your condition. We're all fascinated, you see. There has never been a Gifted with such severe side-effects from having their gift. Well...never mind that."
I can sense some sort of sadness from Eve, but I choose to ignore it. Even if I cared enough about her to allow her to offload her worries on to me, she doesn't seem like she wants to.
"You're sure you can help her?" Kane asks.
"Worry not. There has yet to be a patient I have not cured." Eve's smile is tight as she turns to face Kane, Mathea and my mother; all who decided to accompany me to this appointment.
"Please step into the glass room. This is to ensure you don't bring harm to yourself and the rest of us." Eve turns to address Saint, "Seeing as Willow is no threat when in there, I have no need for you, Saint. You should help Doctor King with his patient, and I will call you when needed."
"The contagious child? No, I prefer to stay here, Eve."
"As always, you'll be provided with protective gear."
"I know one of the volunteers contracted something from that kid, and you doctors don't know how it spreads. I'll be staying here."
"Which division were you transferred from?"
"Time is ticking, Eve. Let's worry about reporting me another time."
I try supress my laugh as I wonder how Saint came to be a volunteer. He clearly isn't bothered about the wellbeing of the patients coming in and out of here. I understand the Purus is short on staff, as Eve mentioned, but I'm sure they can do without him.
I step into the glass room and the door locks behind me.
"The room you're in acts as a giant scanner; monitoring the movements within your body and showing them on my computer. Ms Bare, I'll need you to embrace your pain."
"No. If I do, I'll hurt you. I'm going to fight it."
"You will not be able to hurt us from there, and in the circumstance of you attempting to hurt yourself, I'll release the sleeping gas into the room. Also, I'll need to test your abilities. This includes monitoring how your body responds to pain."
"How are you testing her abilities?" Thea speaks up.
"Unfortunately..." Eve begins.
"No one else is hurting her. Mum, take her out."
"The pain inflicted on her will be nothing severe for someone with her gift."
"Whatever you do still damages her body even though she doesn't feel the pain. Mum, take her out."
"I will tend to any injuries accordingly, and surely you've been taught that an Iron Rod's body heals far better and faster than the average person. At least, you must have realized that by now. Regardless, Willow may tell me to stop at any point, but this experiment is needed. I've been informed about her outbursts and the random occurrence of a pain she feels. I believe experiencing some pain, even though it will be bearable for an Iron Rod, may bring that state forward. I need to see it to study it."
Mathea looks to our mother and waits for her to reject Eve's tactics. However, our mother looks to me and waits for my approval of things. I nod my head, knowing there is no other way to help me. Besides, nothing can be worse than Mr White.
"We'll begin then. Willow, there are wires connected to sticky pads at the rear end of the room. Put them on and you'll soon feel an electric current pass through you. The pill I gave you may help detect your infection. Only embrace the pain when it becomes unbearable to fight against it."
I look to the back of the room and see these wires sticking out of the wall. I then move to pick one up, and as I pull on it, I see that they stretch far. Following Eve's instructions, I attach the wires to myself, and in a matter of minutes, an electric current passes through me. Eve is right; it doesn't hurt much. However, I doubt I can manage this feeling for long.
Eve sits by the computer, and I see my loved ones staring at me from outside this glass room. They're all waiting for something to happen. I wonder what image will show on Eve's computer screen. Perhaps she'll see an infection growing inside me. I can only pray that the cure will be compatible with me and that I'll be able to handle whatever side-effects result from the cure.
"There it is," Eve calls out to no one in particular as she points to a spot on the screen. "You should be able to see a blue fluid. I've set the computer to show anything unnatural in the colour blue."
"But Willow looks calm," Mathea says.
"It seems the fluid is spreading slowly. We can assume her state will worsen once it spreads through her body." Eve turns her body slightly to face me. "Willow, may I increase the voltage?"
This time, Mathea doesn't speak up against Eve. My mother doesn't look to me to see what I will say but rather focuses her eyes on the ground. Saint walks over to Eve, now analysing the computer screen. Honestly, he looks confused while doing so.
Kane is the only one to look at me. I would've preferred a friendly smile or a gesture to motivate me to carry on, but I'm met with a stern face. He probably doesn't think this is the best time to smile. I know it's not, too, but I'm so tired of everything being so gloom.
I nod my head in response to Eve's question. I feel the voltage increase, but it isn't much of a difference. I walk to the edge of the glass room, wanting a closer look at the computer Eve is so focused on. It doesn't take long before I lose interest in the computer, not understanding anything depicted on it. Instead, my focus shifts to Eve's expressions.
I see her shake her head, and fear begins to consume me. I wonder if these people can actually cure me or if we've walked into the lion's den.
Eve stops shaking her head, and I allow myself to calm down. However, as soon as this happens, I begin to feel the impact of this blue fluid that Eve is monitoring in my head—my infection. I crouch to my knees, gripping my head with one hand and harshly scratching my leg with the other.
I manage to look up to Eve and wait for her to say something or knock me out before the pain becomes worse, but Eve says nothing. She doesn't focus on any of the worried faces around her. She only focuses on that computer, and when I'm about to scream for her to do something, Eve smiles. She smiles, and I feel an unbearable amount of electric current passing through me. She has increased the voltage.
I can't help but scream. I scream with all the effort my lungs have, but Eve only stares at that computer. My sister moves towards Eve, probably telling her to stop whatever game she's playing. Kane and my mother follow suit, and when it seems as though they are about to use force, Saint steps in front of Eve. He must know how to defend himself since he is here to ensure I don't get out of hand. However, I'm sure the three of them could over power him.
I continue screaming. I need my family to make Eve stop. Maybe this was part of their plan. Perhaps the Purus never intended on curing me. Maybe they allowed us to stay in their compound to kill us off.
I use all my might to slowly stand up, dropping to my knees before I am able to do this successfully. I see Kane watching me, probably wondering what I am about to do next.
After running to the back of this room, I turn to face everyone. Kane's eyes widen as he realises my intent, but his worry does not stop me. I surge forward, aiming at the glass separating me from the others. If Eve refuses to knock me out, I'll do it myself.
I hear my family member's screaming for me to stop, but their voices seem faint in this situation; a whisper of the devil on my shoulder that attempts to stop me from helping myself. Somehow, these devils have power over me, because I drop to my knees before my head collides with the glass wall.
I become silent, and the room becomes silent as well. Nobody is arguing with Eve anymore or trying to fight on my behalf. They just stare at me. They all stare at me as a chuckle escapes my lips. I've reached the point of embracing whatever it is that's in me.
"Ms Bare, do you no longer feel any pain?" Eve looks at me with amazement.
I only notice the electric current when she mentions it. I still feel them, but the pain is less.
"I have not decreased the voltage, yet she is managing better than some minutes ago," Eve calls out to the room, "The fluid is no longer concentrated on that spot in the brain."
"What does that mean for my daughter?"
Eve looks fascinated as she mutters to herself, but I can't make out what she is saying. She then smiles at me before pressing her finger down on a button. I look around me and see a gas slowly filling the room. It must be the sleeping gas Eve mentioned earlier. It's about time she used it.
Before losing consciousness, I hear Eve's words that seem to confuse everyone in this room. I don't think she even realizes that she is speaking aloud.
"How dangerous you are, Ms Bare. You're just like her."
***
I wake up on a stretcher I never noticed was in this room before. We're still all in Eve's office, but someone must have carried me out of the glass room.
There are empty tranquilizers placed on the table beside me. I assume that Eve used them on me which means I'm back to feeling the pain in my head but being too weak to hurt anyone. I remember Saint asked me to stop taking them after this visit with Eve today. I don't think I will follow his instructions, because even if I want to; I can't risk hurting anyone.
"Your family refused to leave until you woke up. You'll stay here for the night to ensure everything is alright."
I look to everyone in the room and notice Saint is no longer with us. Mother grips my hand as a sad smile appears on her face, showing her worry and relief at the same time.
"You'll be alright, my baby. The doctor said they should be able to help you, and we'll be able to go home soon."
"Go home? I take it the rest of you have agreed to the treatment as well." Eve smiles as she continues speaking, "That's wonderful news."
"No," Kane speaks up, "it's only Willow taking the cure. Mathea and I are fine."
"Then your mother's statement is incorrect. You won't all be able to go home. Willow, once purified, will be able to leave and," Eve turns to my mother, "Zarah, you may leave with her, seeing as you are not sick and are only here as a companion."
Kane's hand clenches into a fist and veins shoot out of his neck as rage fills him. Eve cannot keep them here.
"You said no one is forced to take the cure. You said you believe in freewill," I raise my voice when addressing Eve, speaking for everyone here whose anger is now shown on their face.
"You people think you're better than us; viewing yourselves as some saviours of the world, but you're all sick. You're all liars and killers, and all in the name of what? Order?"
"Ms Bare, do calm down. As I said before; nobody is forced to take the cure."
"Then why can't Mathea and I leave?"
"Although we force no one to be purified, we cannot allow the sick to go back in the world. What will be said of us if we allow the government to continue profiting from your infection or if we allow you to procreate, knowing a Gifted individual is more likely to breed another Gifted individual? That will only bring more unnatural things into this world. Nobody will force a cure down your throat, Kane, but we hope your stay here will act as a motivation for you to accept the purification."
There is silence for some time, and Eve somehow seems puzzled at our angered expressions.
"You are all so lucky to be in this compound. I hate to admit, and it something we are looking into, but a few of our compounds have been diverting from the norm. A few compounds use more...forceful methods to motivate the Gifted into accepting a cure. However, no such methods are used here, and I am certain such methods will soon cease to be used in our other compounds."
"I should have killed you when we first met. There was something telling me to, and I wish I listened," I say, turning away from Eve's now widened eyes to look at my mother. "This can be our second chance. We can leave now."
I can't decide what the look on mother's face means. I see the disgust, but there is something more. Maybe it is sadness caused by the girl our circumstances forced me to become. It may also be anger, but I don't know whether the anger is directed at me or the world. Perhaps she's surprised, but I thought I was passed the point of surprising her. It will definitely be shocking if my mother is contemplating my suggestion.
As violent as my way might seem, I see no other way out of this mess. My mum opens her mouth to speak, but before a word is able to leave her mouth, Kane turns to face me. He moves closer to my face as if he wants no one else to hear this.
"You need to stop, Willow." He raises his hands, and gently cups my face; an act I would have viewed as sentimental if it were not for the look in his eyes. Kane is angry.
Kane then moves away from me and moves quickly towards the door of Eve's office. I swing my legs to the side and hop off the stretcher. Eve calls out my name to protest my departure, but for now, I ignore her existence.
I follow Kane out the door and into the hallway, but Kane's strides do not stop nor slow down despite my cries for him to do so. He continues walking, and I notice we're heading to the rooms. We near Kane's room quickly, and I see him struggle with the door handle before rushing into his room and slamming the door shut behind him.
I slowly reach for the handle as I consider whether or not it is best to speak to him at this time. I could argue with him while he is still angry, allowing him to let out his anger, and eventually we'll both calm down.
Maybe I should let him calm down before speaking to him, but I get afraid when I leave him alone to think for so long. Kane's thoughts are often selfish. When the time comes, he can do what's best for him without caring about the impact his choice has on others. Perhaps everyone should be that way, but this time, I can't let Kane think this way.
I can't afford to lose a friend now, especially when there is still hope for us. I can get better. I will get better and stop behaving in a way that disgusts him. The cure will work on me, and I know we'll figure out a way to all go home.
I open his door to find his gaze already on me.
"Get out."
"I'm sorry, Kane. You know I'm not really like this. I can't say if it's my infection or if this is how I become when I need to survive. I just want to make sure the people I love survive."
"What the fuck are you talking about, Willow?"
I hesitate before answering, "You're angry at who I've become."
"Wow. We hear that I'm stuck here if I don't take the cure, and this is what you come here to say. I'm not thinking about who the hell you've become."
"We'll get this sorted out. If we can't do this alone then I know my dad will help. He is in contact with Saint. Kane, you shouldn't worry about that."
"You know I came from nothing." He now looks more tired than angry.
"Kane, I know."
"Then I became Gifted, and I got my life planned out, Willow. This gift is going to get me everything I deserve."
"I won't let these people take that away from you."
"You've already done that. Hell, you've brought your family here, and everyone is ruined trying to help you."
Sadness grows inside me as I realize how much I've put everyone through. I never wanted this. I don't want any of this. However, I did not force this on him.
"I never asked you to come."
"Well, I'm here. I came here for you, and my life is ruined. Just get out, Willow."
I can't bring myself to look at him. A part of me fears he is right; maybe I have ruined them all.
I turn my back to him and walk out his door. I see my mother and Mathea look at me with pity. They must have heard it all. I push past my family members and walk to my room, rushing to open the door before slamming it shut and throwing myself onto my bed. Pulling the blanket over my head, I lose myself in my thoughts.
Somehow, I'll have to fix this all. I'll wait for the cure, and once I'm alright, I'll find a way for Mathea and Kane to leave this place. I then turn my body, but my head hits the desk near my bed, causing something to shatter on the floor.
I sit up carefully and touch the liquid that is now on the floor. There are multiple small tubes on my table alongside the tranquilizers I use to ensure I'm not a threat to anyone. There is also note written on one of these objects.
Don't use the tranquilizers anymore, but keep them on you in case Eve calls you in for another check-up. We can never be too careful. I don't know how your condition works, but if you can go a couple days without causing problems then do it. Like I said before; you need your strength so we can escape. Your dad will help from the outside. I'm giving you the tubes in case you can't control yourself. They're a weak type of sedative and the effects don't last as long, so I figured they're better. I told Eve the needles freak you out, so I replaced them with the tubes. Goodnight, Willow.
-Saint
I wipe the message off of the tube, ignoring the black marks now left on my hand. I decide to clean up the mess I caused later. Tomorrow, I'll talk to Saint about the escape. We'll get out of here.
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