AAHANA'S POV

Did you ever felt like sitting alone not thinking about anything nor analysing any situation?  I felt like that.  I was tired with severe headache not that Soham is irritating or trying to get on my nerves..  He's just here not talking or discussing about anything not even our marriage.

Why did he ask me out for breakfast?

" I am hungry " I stated to which he raised his head and looked at me

" Shall I order another plate?  Do you want to eat anything else? " he asked me.

" Aloo Partha please " I said looking away.  He nodded his head and waiter noted it down.

It's raining continuously.  This weather is only thing which is making me stay calm with him.  Our order was quick,  as I munched on my food looking at Soham,  I observed him to be lost in his thoughts.  He looks extremely disturbed. 

Is it because of me?   

" Will you talk something ? I mean a bit or a piece of what happened yesterday?  Should I just keep quiet? " I questioned him.

" It is not like that Aahana,  I am thinking.  Don't want to scare you" he replied.

" As if I am not already scared about it " I mumbled eating my food.

" When are we going to get married? " he asked me.

" Excuse me?!  Did anyone of my family stopped you?  " I yelled a bit loudly gaining attention.

I think my patience just went into thin air! Or evaporated!

" I was-"he started and I showed my hand to stop him.

" Stop it.  You didn't even visit my place alone or with your dad.  How can something move forward when you don't get effort from other side? " i questioned him which made his eyes go wide. 

" I am sorry-" he started again but I gave him a sharp look. 

" See Aahana,  I am sorry " he started again.

" Look Soham,  I am very happy you chose to marry me , very lucky that you told me a piece of your past.  I am fed up now.  As much as I love to stay with you whole life,  I can't be in dark trying to figure out what's happening in your life until you give some explanation.  I don't want this.  I don't want us to be together if it's going to be like this my whole life.  " I spoke waiting for him to take a stand. 

" No Aahana!  It's not like that! " he had worried expression on his face.

" I...I wanted to ask if me and my dad can come to your house today,  to discuss about our marriage "he said.

" Regarding yesterday night,  they are the same ones  belong to the person who killed my baby sister.  " he spoke looking sad.

" How come they can walk into orphanage so easily?  Won't you get them arrested or complain to police? How can you allow all this? " shouted again grabbing attention again. 

" Aahana world doesn't follow the rule book.  We have to mend it accordingly. " he spoke while I looked at him bewildered.

" What was the truth which aunt insisted that I should know? " I questioned him.

" Aahana only this.  Nothing else.  They came because they needed some money.  Illegal way of living is what they know.  Don't get worried.  I have informed police about this.  But sadly law can't control everything.  They say there's nothing superior to law but I have seen Aahu how fickle minded people are.  " he spoke lost in some thoughts. 

" Power is law.  The more powerful you are,  the more people bend to you.  It became natural phenomenon in our society now.  Humanity,  Care,  truthfulness is something stupid and foolish people follow according to present scenario " he said thinking deeply. 

I feel him.  I feel his pain suddenly.  How much did he endure?  Loss of his baby sister,  loss of his mother.  How can someone be so calm and strong irrespective of the problems which are lying infront of you? 

" I am sorry Aahana,  I don't mean to keep you in dark.  The amount of thoughts going through in my brain,  is restricting me to talk freely with you.  " he said looking at me seriously while I nodded my head.

" You are free to go away from me.  It's your decision . I will never force you to be with me.  Just because my dad has good reputation you don't need to stick with us.  I promise,  we will never harm you if you plan to leave me.  But you should know that if I have to marry someone it will always be you or no one.  " he spoke with very serious tone. 

Is he going to scold me next? 

" What are those thoughts Soham? " I asked him.

" It's something I don't wish you tell you now "he replied immediately and my anger rose to new level. 

Fine!

Die with your thoughts!

You rotting apple!

" See you are as red as a beautiful rose when you are angry " he said flicking my nose. 

" I am not angry,  just calm and composed you see.  " I pointed out stuffing my food to avoid any further question.

" My thoughts were about our marriage Aahu,  I was worried if yesterday nights incident will effect your decision regarding our marriage.   I was thinking about safety of our orphanage. " he said smiling lightly.

" We will marry if you atleast visit our house . You have digitalised our relationship so much" I exclaimed drinking coffee.

" Digitalised?  How exactly? " he asked with amusement lacing his tone.

" Yeah.  Your dad asked my dad over the phone, later they met and you came to know about our marriage over the phone which I told you in person. I feel you will marry me through Skype and our children will be born through Google Duo " I blabbered not looking at him.

He laughed loudly throwing his head back. 

" You are so worried.  I am glad,  you are excited to marry me " he said winking at me.

" I am not excited! " I defended.

" Thanks for the assurance that you won't leave me. " he held my hand smiling at me. 

" You can't guarantee that " I said taking my hand away in fake anger.  His expression changed.  He was angry.

" Don't you dare say that!  I will not let you go! " he voiced out with anger flowing in his words. 

" Soham.. " I trailed.

" Not a word Aahana!  I don't appreciate such things from you!  I am just tired of losing everyone close to me all the time.  I want you, need you in my life.  Will you be there for me? " he asked with tears flowing from his eyes.

" Soham.. I was just joking " I said holding his hand.

" No, please. Don't.  Such this one.  Please Aahu.  You don't know how much I have suffered.  I don't want to lose you" he spoke gripping my hand tightly in his.

" I won't " I replied looking at him keenly.  We both had our breakfast and prepared to leave after paying for it.  While he dropped me back to my home,  he held my hand with one hand.  I didn't protest.  He still hasn't come out of it.

" Don't worry Aahu,  our children won't be born out of Google duo.  I will certainly make sure of it " he spoke winking at me not before waving me bye.  I smiled at him.

Today I think I have understood a bit of him.  He might be silent and calm in nature but for the happiness of the people he loves,  he can go to any measure.  Emotions are something that humans choose to express the way they are,  today I have seen the amount of emotions he had in him. The way he cried,  the way he got angry, and the playfulness,  all of it shows how much he had to endure to see his loved ones happy.  How much he wanted to express those emotions to them but he couldn't as he lost them. 

Today,  I saw a person who feels he has failed in doing his job,  making his people fail.  I saw that side of Soham,  who was tortured due to the number of incidents that took place around him.  Not everyone feels safe to cry in front of anyone. He made me realize,  I am an important part of his life now,  not because he cried, something in him said he's waiting for a person like him in his life.  My breakfast date with him didn't go all roses but it helped me to know him a bit.  Aren't dates meant to help us like that?

I hope I can make his life a bit happy and happening! 

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