Chapter 15: I Sit Alone
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I sit alone.

On the roof is where I chose to do this on my own.

I did this to myself,
I told my self so,
that I needed to do this,
to sit in the wind so cold.

I don't like poems.
"They're stupid" is what I felt.
But after thinking some more,
I took the cards I was dealt.

My life is terrible,
I know that for sure.
And I can't find anything that would tell me otherwise.
Not even someone saying that I am completely pure.

That is for sure a lie.
Pure I cannot be.
I'm a demon, a witch,
and "as evil as can be"

I go by many names,
Though I won't state them here.
Too many eyes,
may come in and peer,

at the words on this page,
that I carefully wrote.
But if I keep saying things like that,
I'll probably end up broke.

My plans are absolute.
My goal is for certain.
But for now I guess,
That I shouldn't close the curtain.

I'm sitting alone in my roof right now.
Thinking of the right words to write...
This is why I hate poetry.
You end up staying awake all night.

I guess I should finish now.
To save room for more.
Why do I make myself do this?
It feels like a chore.

Because my mother did it.
That's why.
She said it would help,
If I ever felt like I was going to cry.

I'm not going to cry.
I just feel sad.
I'm lonely and have no friends.
But is that bad?

This life I've chosen for myself,
is no easy task.
Maybe if I quit,
I'll be happy at last.

I can't quit now.
I'm not done yet.
I have responsibilities,
and quotas I haven't met.

This is harder than I thought it would be.
I'm not talking about spilling my feelings onto a page.
I have to stay quiet and hidden,
and keep off of the stage.

I should stop.
It's getting very late.
My kittens are hungry.
And I haven't gotten food onto my plate.

To my house is where I go. I chose this life on my own.

I sat alone.

Raven shut the little blue notebook and pocketed the tiny pencil she brought up with her.

She shivered as a gust of 30 degree wind blew around the curves of her neck and brushed past her ears.

She held her arms tight to her body as she regretted coming up here with a camisole and barefoot.

Another dumb move.

She took one last look at the city before heading inside.