Chase is holding me, a bright light being shown into the van. I look up at Nathan as my hearing comes to me, listening to Nathan shouting, Asha whispering to the twins and the twins whimpering. "C-Chase..." He looks down at me as I try to collect some air into my lungs. "W-What's happening?"

"They found us, and want to separate us." He holds me closer. I hiss as he touches my arm. He lets go of me and I'm dragged from my bed, Nathan screaming to be let go, Chase running after me as Asha is carried with me and the Twins crying hysterically.

I wake up quickly, sitting up and crashing back down to my pillow and gapping for air. Chase is quick to react, trying to cover up gasps so I don't wake anyone else us. He's lying next to me while I'm on my back, him on his stomach. He holds his hand to my cheek, gently rubbing his thumb against my skin.

"Olive, what's wrong?" He asks as I take in deep breaths, trying to refocus on myself. I turn my head to him and he stares at me, his eyes scream for an answer, to know I'm okay. "Did you have a nightmare? Did your arm wake you up?"

"N-Nightmare." I stammer out and he lets out a relived sigh. "I-I'm fine."

He sighs, staring at me, his eyes flickering form his hands to me, silence incasing us for a few moments. "No you're not Olive," he sits up, then standing and grabbing something, returning with a bottle of water. I take small sips of it and he knits his eyes brows. I take a few gulps and he takes the bottle from my lips and lies it on the floor, then looking at me as he lies back down.

"Chase..."

"Olive, you know I care about you right?"

"Yes." I turn my head up, staring at the ceiling.

"Do you care about yourself?"

I lick my lips. "Why do you ask?"

"Because when I pulled you out of that fire Asha demanded we changed you. Me, Nathan, Asha, we all saw what you do to yourself..." He's quiet. I know what he's talking about. "Your thighs Olive. Why do you do that to yourself, why that many-" he shuts himself up, gulping down a sob. "Why do you hate yourself so much?" I take a slow breath, not answering for a few minutes.

"I don't see what you see in me Chase. I don't see a pretty face, I see a face that won't matter to anyone. I don't see hair that deserves to be played with or a body that deserves to be seen naked by a boy. I..." I don't know what to say. "I don't think I'm pretty or anything. I don't think I deserve to see tomorrow or that I'm destined for anything great..." My voice shakes. "I almost killed myself a week before the bombs dropped. I didn't because Avery called about homework and I forgot to slide that blade down my damn wrists." I choke back a cry.

"I know this won't change a thing but I think you're the most perfect girl left in this world. If it was just us left, I would still be happy with you." We don't say anything. I feel his arm wrap around my waist and I feel him pepper kisses on my left shoulder. "I don't want to wake up without you next to me, Olive. I want to wake up to red headed, red eyed kids bouncing on our bed and giggling and laughing. I want to wake up to see you peacefully sleeping, and to see your eyes open to a beautiful blue color," he kisses my shoulder again. "I want to wake up with you because I love you, Olive." He's quiet, gently kissing my shoulder. "I know this won't change a thing about what you think about yourself, and the fact I didn't notice them earlier, just makes me sick of myself. I-I..." He goes quiet and I listen to his breathing. "I-I love you more then myself Olive."

"Chase, I know you do, and no matter what you do I'll always feel this way about myself. Just because the day is less grey doesn't mean I'm getting better." He's quiet. He kisses my shoulder again and I sigh and bite my lip. He lifts himself above me and softly smiles at me.

"Can I be the reason why it's less gray?" He asks. I can't help but smile at his stupidity. He leans down to me, our lips brushing. "Can I kiss you?"

"...yes..." He gently places his lips on mine, then lifting up after a few seconds of a small kiss. He lies back down and places his arm around my waist, softly smiling as he makes sure he's not touching my arm.

"Does this hurt?"

"No." He kisses my shoulder again and we fall back asleep.

–/\–/\–/\–/\–

It's been a week since my arms been burned. Asha says I should go down to the river and wash up, but with it still being winter I feel like I'll immediately freeze as soon as I hit the water. "Why don't you send the two lovers down?" Nathan laughs. "They could use the alone time." He winks at me and Chase as I slowly gather new clothes to change into. Chase rolls his eyes while I try to hide my blush.

"And he's the only one who's seen Olive naked," Asha adds. I blush more while Chase yells at her about how she knows such information. "Nathan can't stop talking when you give him enough alcohol."

"How much have you even drank?" I glare up at Nathan as he shrugs.

"A bottle of vodka at most." I glare at him I as I struggle to open to door. Chase opens it for me and helps me out, walking me down to the river. I set my things down on a rock after dusting snow off. I struggle to pull my clothes off and Chase chuckles as I fumble with my shirt.

"Nervous?" He laughs.

"I have a burned arm and an audience. What do you think?" I deadpan at him. He chuckles and scratches the back of his head. "Can you help me and not stare?" He laughs again and fumbles an apology then takes off my hoodie and pulls my shirt off. I unbutton my jeans and unzip them, then struggle to pull them down my legs. "Help?"

"Are you okay with me touching there?" He asks and I nod. "Verbal response."

"Yes, I am–why are you so obsessed with consent all of the sudden?"

"Because I want to make sure that you're okay with everything I'm doing to you." He holds the edge of my jeans and I nod at him.

"I'm okay with everything you do," he wiggles his eyebrows and I blush hard, holding my hand to face. "N-Not like that–can you just help me out of my clothes?" He nods and pulls my pants off my legs, then pulling my socks off. he slowly takes off the bandages on my arm. It's so burned, my skins red and bubbly and crinkled, a few pieces of my flesh left hanging and some making it seem like my skin was an ocean, creating waves.

His eyes scan my skin and he sighs, gently kissing my forehead before turning around so I can take my bra off and my underwear. I slowly walk into the water and shiver as I submerge myself. "C-can you help me?' I stammer out and he turns, quickly pulling himself to the edge of the water and washing my hair. I almost fall asleep when I'm reminded I'm in freezing cold water and shouldn't fall asleep.

"You okay?" He asks and I hum, my body feeling numb. "You should get out." I slowly nod and he washes my hair one more time before I crawl out. He holds the towel over my body and gently cleans the water from me, then staring at my chest. I try to hold my arm over myself.

"I...stop staring." His eyes flicker to mine and shakes his head then nods.

"Yeahrightsorry." He rushes out and hands me my underwear and bra and quickly turns. I giggle softly and get dressed before I can get hypothermia. I tap his shoulder and he turns, helping me into my clothes. "L-Lets get back." He stammers out and starts to walk away, then looking at me when I don't move. "Olive?"

"I-I can't walk r-right now." I stammer and he nods, walking back and picking me up, slinging the towel over his shoulder and walking up the hill to our camp, pulling open the door to the van and setting me inside.