Tsunade POV~

I groaned and leaned back in my chair, dragging a hand down my face. 

With a frustrated yell, I swiped a hand over the table and knocked off the stack of sheets piled on top of it. 

"Fuck this!" 

Tonton gave a snort of protest, while Shizune sighed from her spot in the corner and made to pick up the papers. I instantly felt a stab of guilt, my anger evaporating. I heaved a heavy breath, wondering how Shizune dealt with my bullshit day in and day out.

"Sorry..." I mumbled, standing.

Too much had been on my mind lately. Now, to top it off, there were reports of a possible terrorist organization to look out for.

And the rumors said they were hunting the Tailed Beasts.

The "Akatsuki," as they were called, had already managed to kidnap the Kazekage, extract the One-Tails, and kill the Jinchuriki of the Two-Tails and take that one too. 

To make matters worse, a letter had arrived from Kakashi about the scene they came upon. 

He didn't know this yet, but there was no doubt in my mind the Akatsuki had something to do with it.

I'd heard about them before. They were pretty underground before now, keeping their actions as nondescript as possible, but now they were going around collecting the Bijuu.

And Naruto was attacked by them.

I felt I had every right to be frustrated.

I plopped back down in my chair. Danzo was also a concern, though he was much closer to home. In fact, he was probably right down the hall. He had appointed one of his own to Kakashi's team, which none of us were happy about but none of us could actually argue against, and there was something...off. About everything.

Danzo's Foundation was still a thing, apparently. 

I couldn't help but be suspicious. Danzo had a lot of authority (something I should've changed long ago, except now it'll be a lot harder than before. Sensei was too lenient.) I couldn't help but feel he was up to something.

I sighed. Whatever he was planning, it could wait.

The Tailed Beasts were being collected by a terrorist organization.

I dropped my head on the table. All I wanted was to sleep. Have a drink or something.

How the fuck did I end up Hokage?

Oh yeah. That was Naruto.

I grimaced, painful emotions and memories resurfacing. Now wasn't the time for that.

I set to work writing a reply to Kakashi. I may not have been the most eager putting Naruto back in the Hidden Leaf before, but his life was in danger. Even though he probably knew it by now, he was being hunted by dangerous rogue ninjas who he couldn't possibly take down all by himself.

Knowing Naruto, that was probably what he was trying to do, anyways. 

I shook my head, conflicting feelings rising up inside me.

I couldn't lose him too. He could be killed. I can't let that happen.

Not this time.

Naruto POV~

I ended up robbing someone. A rich person, just like Kurama said.

'Aren't you proud of me?'

"Shut up, brat. You're asking if I'm proud that you robbed someone?"

I pouted, 'It was one of those money-spoiled greedy scumbags. I was very careful not to steal from someone who needed the money. This guy probably didn't even notice it was gone.'

Kurama huffed. I shuddered slightly, glad that I wasn't looking at him at the moment, too busy buying my disguise. 

'What do merchants wear?'

"WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU ASKING ME?"

I grumbled, 'Who should I ask, then? The storekeeper? That sounds hella sketchy, you know. Pfff.' I went back to looking through the items, 'A merchant asking what merchants wear...'

"You ain't no merchant."

'That's right. I'm not. BUT THEY'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT.'

Eventually, I settled on an average-looking brown shirt. It was slightly baggy and a plain color, perfect for staying unnoticed. I kept the shinobi sweatpants that I was still wearing, adjusting it so that it didn't look so "shinobi" and hiding the kunai pouch in the thin navy-blue vest I was wearing. My sandals I kept, since I was supposed to be a somewhat skilled merchant who specialized in trading in shinobi villages. My henge was a man with a lanky build, long spiky brown hair tied in a ponytail, and sea-green eyes. I even had a silk cap to top off the look, along with a very merchant-y bag.

'Very merchant-y.'

"That's stupid."

'You're stupid.'

I clapped my hands together. 'All right. All that's left now is to get into the Sand Village without anyone suspecting us.'

"Shouldn't be too hard."

'I hope so.'

And so that's how I ended up getting ganged up on in some alley in the Hidden Sand.

At first it was going all well. I approached the main gate, after trudging through hot desert and shifty sand and why the fuck does sand keep getting my shoes. They questioned me and my intentions, and my expert lying skills got me through. They searched me, scanned me, everything. Eventually, they let me by.

I heaved a sigh of relief as soon as I was in. 

'They probably sent someone to keep an eye on me.'

"Hm. Probably. Careful, Naruto."

'I will be.' I walked as normally as I could along the side of the street. I forced myself into the open a little more, but walking straight down the middle was a little too much for me. Force of habit, I suppose. 

'Tch. We can't use your chakra to check if I'm being followed or not.'

"You're too dependent on me. Think of this as a learning experience."

'Okay, okay. Jeez.'

As I head to the market, I listened in on whatever snippets of conversation I could. With my sharp hearing, I caught quite a few things. One talk between a couple of shinobi in particular got my attention.

'Damn. Gaara's still alive?'

"From the looks of it."

After hearing a few more sentences, understanding dawned.

'That's a weird jutsu. Awfully useful for the situation, but damn. An old lady died to resurrect him?'

"Hm. I think I've heard of that jutsu before. I don't know. It's not very well known."

I grimaced, 'I can see why. A life for a life, though, huh?'

"Do the products not interest you?"

I glanced up at the voice. A shopkeeper was eyeing me. He must've seen the look on my face. I shook my head. 

"No, no. These are quite beautiful." I gestured to the silks laid out on the stand before me. Even to the un-merchanty eye, I could tell they were precious. Expensive. "I was just lost in my own thoughts, is all."

The shopkeeper smiled at me. "Any that catch your eye?"

I laughed, my years of practice at fake laughing paying off, "If I could afford them."

"Well, this one is on sale." he pointed to a gleaming silver one, noticeably less shiny than the rest. "Only..."

I agreed to the price, if only to keep up my merchant facade, and instantly regretted it.

'I only have a little left. Goddammit.'

"He got quite a lot of money out of you. Must've known you would pay a lot. Guys like him can smell novice merchants."

'Thanks for the early warning.'

Suddenly, an arm lashed out from the side of the alley. My shinobi reflexes were about to kick in, but then...wait I'm a merchant. Supposedly.

So, sensing a not-very-strong vibe from the arm reaching towards me, I let it grab me and pull me away from the bustling street.

Anddddd then I was in an alleyway surrounded by a group of obvious street urchins. Very buff street urchins. Not like they could beat me, but I was trying to be nondescript.

"How 'bout it?" The one who grabbed me grinned, revealing a silver tooth and a gap right next to it. He held out his hand, "Han' it over. All the money you got on you. If you agree, we ain't gonna rough you up too bad."

The guys around him cackled. He looked me over, seeming a little put off by my lack of fear. I just sighed and shrugged, pulling out the rest of the money I had and the silk I just bought. I didn't exactly need them anyways. I already got what I wanted: confirmation that Gaara was alive, and the names and general descriptions of two Akatsuki members, Sasori of the Red Sand and Deidara.

"Here. Take them." I handed them over, and the guy scowled and snatched them out of my hand, stuffing them in his pocket. I frowned. What a waste of good silk. 

"This guy's pissin me off." he punched his hands together, grinning, "I'll just get a punch or two in and let you off easy, eh? Can't have you leaving without a little fun first."

I sighed and dragged a hand down my face. I really should be keeping up appearances as a merchant, but I was tired and I wasn't up to playing along with some random guy's bullshit. It was about time I got out of here anyways.

"Baka. You can't just up and leave when you just got here, without any money or supplies too. That's suspicious. You could say you were robbed, which is a plausible explanation as to why you're suddenly broke, but it wouldn't make sense for you to just go."

I froze, realization of Kurama's words just coming to me.

'Well, shit. Now what?'

"Think of something."

I raised an eyebrow at the guys who ganged up on me. 'Well, I'm a shinobi merchant. I'll beat them up. With taijutsu.'

"Good boy."

The dude with the silver tooth rushed forward, cracking his knuckles and sending a right hook straight to my face.

Mistake number one.

I shifted my weight, his fist flying past me by mere inches and going straight into the wall behind me. With that punch, he'd left himself completely open, allowing me to get a solid kick into his stomach. He gagged, flying backwards and skidding across the ground.

"I suppose I can't trade in shinobi villages without picking up a few things." I grinned at the others, whose jaws were still on the floor, "Though you guys live in a ninja village. I have to say, this is quite disappointing."

"You used to live in one too, ya know."

'Shut up.'

My words seemed to snap them out of their shock. With a yell, all four of them rushed towards me at once, one of them even pulling out a knife. In a flash, I whipped forward my fists, efficiently knocking out two and striking the other two with a couple of well-aimed kicks. I ducked under the swinging arm of silver-tooth guy, who had managed to stand again. A quick jab to the stomach had him on the ground again.

Satisfied with my win, I plucked the silver silk and some of the money out of his pocket (I left him a small amount, if only out of pity) and strolled out of the alleyway and back onto the streets. Nobody even batted an eye.

'See? I'm not that dependent on you.'

"Brat. You should be able to do some decent taijutsu. I'd beat your ass if you couldn't do at least that much. "

'I love you too.'

Kurama sighed, lengthy and exasperated. "Now what?"

I looked around, hands on my hips in a dramatic fashion.

'I'll find myself an inn for the night.'