[NOT EDITED]

Katherine's POV

I think my heart stopped beating or maybe it's just beating faster than it should. I still can't wrap my mind about what's happening.

I think i stopped breathing , i even stopped thinking.

I am refusing to think.

No.

Please no.

Tell me this is just a dream. A nightmare. Please.

I don't know how i managed to pull my shattered self and stand up , I rushed away then dropped on the ground beside him.

"Alex !" I gasped , my whole body shaking as i took a look at his white shirt , which is not so white anymore. He closed his eyes pressing them tight , he pursed his lips , his trembling hand went toward his stomach , toward where the shots are , he groaned , he is in pain.

Oh my god , no , Alex.

"No , n-no." I shook my head , my tears streaming as i still couldn't believe how this happened.

I looked at Ashton who's still looking shocked and paralyzed  , "Call 911 , do something !" I said pulling him out of his trance as he struggled to his feet and went toward the phone.

Caleb stood there beside Alex's half-conscious body , his eyes wide , the gun slipped out of his hands and dropped to the ground beside me , its voice shuttered my inside even more.

He backed away , blood covering his clothes , his hands,

Blood's everywhere.

Alex's blood..

Vengeance burned within my inside , and I don't know from where i gathered the courage in me and stood up , i pushed him away , "YOU DID THIS ! It's because of you."

His wide eyes kept looking at Alex , he looked like he didn't believe what happened as well. I didn't waste a second as i picked the gun from the ground and pointed it toward him, the metal felt heavy and weird in my hand , I don't know what i am doing , I am not thinking straight.

The only thing i am seeing is blood, there is blood everywhere.

The only voice i am hearing is my wild racing pulse in my ears.

"I .. I d-didn't .." Caleb stuttered looking at me , then looked back at Alex , his face pale white , his eyes still wide , his mouth hang open as if trying to say something but nothing is coming out, he shook his head his eyes not leaving Alex.

I was too shocked to realize what is happening when i felt someone behind me , my back was pressed against his front , then his hand went over mine and gently he took the gun away but I tried to grab it again.

"No , no.." I said shaking my head hysterically. I want the gun , i want Caleb to pay , he has to pay for everything he is doing , "Katherine." Ashton's voice came low , his breath brushing against my neck as he talked .

He was able to take the gun away from my reach , then he turned me around so i can face him , but I don't know why when i looked at his face , everything inside me broke down.

Everything happened today , from Ashton to what Caleb was about to do to me, to Alex now , everything, it was just too much to bare , too much that I can't- i just can't..

This , this is just not fair.

I gasped for a breath , my throat closing up, my whole body started trembling, i am feeling dizzy , i feel like someone's suffocating me.

My shaking hand traveled to my neck , i rubbed it or maybe i was scratching it , I don't know.

I just want to catch a breath.

It is like i am feeling Caleb's touch all over my body again , making me want to go , run away from my body , to escape, but still , i can't.

And in the same time , i am just seeing Alex's blood all over the place. I am not seeing Ashton who's just in front of me , i am not even hearing what he is telling me.

I started to see black from the corner of my eyes , i felt i am losing my balance , but Ashton's arms grabbed me, his hand went to my neck , he tried to remove my hand away ,he held it tight in his hand ,he then palmed my cheek gently snapping me back to reality , "Katherine !"

"Baby calm down." He said , panic obvious in his tone, "Shush.. Katherine please .. calm down."

When he talked is when i heard my voice , i am sobbing loudly. I didn't notice that , it's like i am not the one controlling my body anymore.

I clutched on his arm trying to stand straight ,trying to calm my sobs, trying to suppress my pain.My gaze traveled to Alex again , and looking at him i came back to my senses.

I left Ashton's arm and kneeled beside Alex, his eyes were closed , I palmed his cheek to check if he is still awake , "Alex." I sniffled , my voice almost a whisper.

He opened his eyes slightly and looked at me , his face is drained of color , sweat started to form over his forehead.

Ashton came beside him as well , "They're gonna be here any moment now , just stay with us buddy." He said , his eyes traveled to where Alex got shot , he opened Alex's shirt and i had to look away , all this blood is getting me dizzy and i feel like just throwing up.

"F*ck !" I heard Ashton curse , i looked back , he ripped a piece of the shirt and placed it above the wound , he pressed his hand over it making Alex groan in pain.

"You're hurting him." I said panicked as i saw Alex's uncomfortable expression.

"I should put pressure over the wound to stop the bleeding." He said and Alex's whimper in pain made my heart twist in my chest more as tears fell freely from my eyes.

"Where is the ambulance?" I asked , my voice shaking because if we waited more it will just worsen the situation.

When i heard the voice of a car moving , my eyes widened, I looked around and didn't find Caleb.

Ashton probably noticed that as well, "I am not letting that bastard run away." He growled , then he took my hand and placed it where he was pressing before storming outside.

My hand was trembling over Alex's abdomen , it is so warm there , a pile rose up in my throat , my stomach tightened and I couldn't help myself from sobbing loudly again.

"D-don't cry.." Alex's weak voice made me look at his face ,his eyes halfway opened , he swallowed hard ,  "I am.. f-fine sweetheart."

His words just made me cry more , he is not fine , he knows that.

He looked in so much pain. Because of me. It's all because of me.

I saw him closing his eyes again , "Alex no , please stay with me , don't you dare do this." I directly said , panic and fear evident in my voice as i rubbed his cheek with my other hand wanting him to wake up.

He opened his eyes again ,he parted his lips to say something , but instead , he started coughing loudly , and when i saw blood coming out from the corner of his mouth , I couldn't contain myself anymore , "No Alex please ! No no ! Oh my God , this is all because of me."

He stopped coughing but he closed his eyes again , i started shaking him , "Alex ! Please wake up , please !"

I moved my trembling hand toward his neck to check his pulse , it was faint , but at least , it was there.

He parted his lips and said something but i didn't catch what he said , his voice wasn't clear but i was just able to hear one word , my mind recognized only one word ,"Cara."

My chest tightened even more , Cara , i have to tell her, what's gonna happen to her ?!

I ignored that thought when Alex's hand dropped limply beside him on the ground. My eyes widened and it felt like he pulled my heart out of my chest. Right there and then i wished that they didn't came here , because whatever Caleb was going to do to me would be easier than seeing him dying in front of my eyes.

I am going to lose Alex.

We will lose Alex.

No, no , this can't be happening. I screamed from the inside. I couldn't find my voice anymore.

His chest wasn't raising up and down normally , he - he is not breathing.

In that exact moment i went numb that I didn't notice people entering the house , I didn't know how they entered or how they even took Alex from beside me, how they carried him outside.

I didn't make a voice , all my tears dried.

When two arms wrapped themselves around me , i was pulled out of the shock , Ashton was kneeling in front of me , his arms around me holding me tight , "Let's go." He said , pain and agony written on his face , and evident in his voice.

"He stopped breathing." I stated , my voice surprisingly low , still no tears coming out of my eyes , "We lost him."

"Katherine don't say that ! " he said , more like ordered , "He is going to be fine , he has to be fine."

"NO , NO , No!" I snapped, "He is going to die." I whispered the sentence , "And it's my fault." The tears found their way again to my eyes , "It's my fault Ashton !"

"No baby , no , it's not your fault , he will be fine , this is Alex , he will be fine." He said trying to assure me , but I didn't believe him , i know he is trying to assure himself with those words as well. The fear in his eyes is saying it all.

"Come let's change your clothes and go to the hospital." He said and i looked at myself , there is blood on Ashton's sweater that i am wearing. Blood is also covering my trembling hands.

We changed and within few minutes we arrived to the hospital.

We knew that they just entered him to the operation theatre , Ashton was calling someone but I didn't listen what he was saying , my mind was going wild thinking of the possible ways this is going to end.

I just hope he will be okay.

Please Alex , be okay.

When Ashton finished the call,he directly came beside me and pulled me toward him , "Stop doing this to yourself." He said with a sigh, "It's not good for you or for the baby's health."

"But I am scared." I said then tilted my head looking at his face. "What if he didn't make it ?"

Ashton closed his eyes for a brief second ,his hand around me tightened. He didn't answer this time , he doesn't have an answer.

"Let's just hope for the best." He said , the uncertainty in his voice made my heart crack more , Alex is his friend before he was mine , he is probably in much more pain than i am , but as always he is trying his best to not show it.

I wrapped my arms around his waist burying my face in the warmth of his chest. "You came back." I said.

He placed his chin over my head ,"I will never leave again." He said , the only thing that made me relax today , "Do you forgive me ?"

I pulled away , my hands still wrapped around him , i looked at his face , "You're not the only one blamed. I also said things I should've not said. Are you still mad at me ?"

"I was never mad at you." He said as he shook his head , "I was angry at myself, at my stupid actions. But then I realized that you're the only good thing in my life , So i can't let you go. I will never let you go."

His words instead of relieving me, they just added more salt to the wound. I swallowed hard and i didn't know how to reply.

I have to tell him. One way or another , he deserves to know.

But I don't have that courage in me. I am afraid. I don't know from what , but i am just afraid.

Still no one knows about this. No one but me and the doctor.

But till when i can keep that. Sooner or later , they will know. They have to.

But maybe i am just afraid of their reaction.

Ashton , I can't even think of how he is going to respond to that. Will he accept it ?

And Cara , she..

Wait , Cara !

Oh my god , i have to tell her about Alex.

"I should call Cara !" I said suddenly as my eyes widened.

"I don't think calling her is a good idea." Ashton said , "We should go and get her."

And there he had a point.

"But Alex, who - who will stay here , the doctors may get out any moment." I said , we can't leave like this and leave him alone.

"I called his.." Ashton started to say but was interrupted when a man called his name.

We both turned around to see an old man walking toward us.

"Did you know anything?" He asked concern filling his voice as he looked from Ashton to me then back to Ashton.

Is he Alex's father ? I think so.

He looks younger than Ashton's father , his hair is not grey but the few wrinkles on his face showed that he is probably in his forties. But what caught my attention the most is that he looks nothing like Alex.

"We don't know anything yet." Ashton said , the man looked worried and concerned.

"We have to go for a while." Ashton said , "You're staying here , right ?"

"Of course yeah." The man said.

Ashton nodded , and then placed his hand behind my back as we walked away , "Is he Alex's father ?" I directly asked as we made our way out of the hospital.

"No, he's his uncle." Ashton said , my eyebrows knitted in confusion, why would his uncle come , not his parents.

Ashton looked at me , he probably noticed my confused expression so he answered my unspoken question, "His mother died while she was giving birth to him." He said , my heartbeats accelerated for some reason , "And William , the man inside , he is her brother, he raised Alex."

"What about his father ?" I asked , "Alex doesn't know him , some random guy knocked up his mother and no body know who he is. It was a one night stand thing." Ashton's words definitely was a thing I wasn't expecting.

I never knew anything about Alex's family before and I didn't imagine it's like this.

Ashton started driving toward Cara's house and my mind was busy with Alex's condition and with how i am going to tell Cara about this, i already feel that i lost my voice.

This is just so familiar, but the places are switched.

I don't know if it's just me or the ride took longer than it should but the moment we pulled outside her house , i felt paralyzed and unable to move.

Ashton squeezed my hand in an assuring way , he looked into my eyes , he gave me a small smile - an assuring one , he knows that this is familiar to me, he knows that this is just a reminder from my past. "I am with you." He said , "It's okay."

If you're not with me , I don't know what I would've done with myself.

I nodded and then we went out of the car and walked toward the door.

Taking a deep breath , i rang the bell. Ashton's hand still holding mine tightly giving me the assurance that it's going to be okay.

When i heard footsteps nearing , my heartbeats accelerated and i felt like just running away. But i stayed.

Cara needs me so i stayed.

She opened the door , and when she saw me her lips curved into a smile , "Katherine." She said , then looked back at Ashton.

She knitted her eyebrows, her smile dropped probably noticing our facial expression, "What's wrong ? " she asked confused as she looked between the both of us.

My eyes started itching at the side from how hard i am trying to hold my tears back , so i closed them for a second but then I couldn't help the single tear that escaped past my closed eyelids.

A tear that hold in itself the pain of the present and in the same time the past.

Three years ago , i was on the other side of the door , while Cara and Caleb were on the opposite one.

Don't cry Katherine. You're not chained to your past anymore, stop crying !

But to be honest i am not crying at myself, i am crying because i endured that pain once and I don't want Cara to endure it.

I don't want her to feel that damn pain , she doesn't deserve it.

"Katherine ! Why you're crying ?" She asked in alarm , and i can't even find my voice.

She looked at Ashton , "What happened ?" She asked him when she knew i am not answering.

Ashton sensed that I can't do that, so he said the words on my behalf , i felt my heart cracking before hers would.

"Alex is in the hospital." Ashton said , i looked away , I can't meet her eyes , "We need you to come with us."

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Short chapter i know , but i promised i will update soon and this what i was able to come with.

Next update will be longer for sure.

So my baby Alex got shot😢 *wipes an actual tear*. What do you think will happen next ?

Stay tuned.

Love ya ❤️