What was he doing here? How did he find me? Did he see me crying? I stood there dumbly staring at Edward. I felt my heart beating and I knew I wasn't mistaken to assume that I was in love with him. "Ed-"I start to say "Edward!!! Sweetheart..where'd you go? You promised that we'd have a few perfect moments to ourselves!" Kate said while linking hands with Edward "sorry babe we can do that now." Ed said grinning happily down at Kate....he looks happy..he would never be that happy with me...I couldn't bear that..."Jen..are you ok-" Ed begins to say but I cut him off.

"Well well well! Look at our happy couple! Don't worry about me.. pretend I don't exist..I'll be getting out of your hair now!" I say ,throwing up my hands in mock surrender. I want him to be happy.
"Aw Jenny! Your so understanding! Now shoo!" Kate laughs, I stick my tongue out.Even if it can't be with me..
"I'll see you two lovebirds later!" I say,giving them a wave. Walk away Jenny..resist your urge to stay..don't be selfish.
"Jen!"Edward yells. Why? Why must he make it so hard to be selfless? "Are you alright? I thought ..you..were crying..?" Don't you dare care! Not for me..! I laugh "why on earth would I be crying? I just made a great discovery about myself!" I say,giving him a quick wave before half walking half jogging back to the mansion.
Forgetting him as fast as possible will be best for everyone..specially him..I don't know how long I can keep up the act...

                                                      ★★★★★★★★★★★★★

I saw Hal at the back of the room chatting up a pretty blonde and made my way over to him "hey Jenny!" He started saying then his face grew serious and abandoning blonde girl he came over to me "are you okay?   Were you..crying?" He asks, his face full of concern.

"Why? No...yes...just a little.. is it that obvious?" I ask worriedly. Hal shrugs his shoulders "Nah..but you just gave me proof that my suspicion was right" he said, I laugh "good one"

"Do you want to go home?"

"No it's OK I'll hang here till your ready" I say and try to turn away, he grabs my hand and stares at me straight through my eyes "stay with me okay?" He asks, as if he had some hidden message in his words..but he seemed like he was in desperate need of an answer so I smile "OK "

                                          ★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★

          "Awwww Jenny! Why did you make me take a bath in 15 degrees cold water? I almost froze to death!!!" Hal wailed at me,we were talking about the camp,"suck it up you baby! Your alive right?" I laugh at him

"What were you going to do if I'd died?! The world would be loosing this face!" He said wiggling his eyebrows

"No great loss if you ask me" I say folding my arms and pouting. He gives me a shocked look and grabs Luke's shirt "I feel so dejected!!!  Luuuuuuuuke!!!! Back me up!! This cruel woman!!" He says, pointing an accusing finger at me.

"Sorry Hal...but if you did die then my shirt would survive tonight without you clinging on to it!" Luke says,shooing Hal off. Hal puckers his lips and gives Luke the 'puppy dog eyes' "what do you care for more the shirt or me?!" He wails at Luke

"Uh....Shirt. Definetly Shirt. This baby cost me 100 dollars," Luke says,wiping invisible dust off his prescious shirt. I laugh "Luke is always on my side Hal..you should know that by now," I gloat,whilst putting my elbow on Luke's shoulder.

" There all on your side! It's not fair!!!! Guys!!! You knew me first!!"  Hals practically screams

"Where's the fire?" Chris says,walking in on our bickering, right then Roger comes up to us

"I'm Sooo hungry," he says

"Ahhh. Here 's the fire!" Chris says grinning

"What fire?" Asks a very confused Roger

"The one that burns away food and carbs," I say ,pointing at Roger. Chris grabs his stomach and starts laughing "good one Jen!"

     Roger convinces us to go with him to the buffet table and we all walk whilst chatting "so what were you bickering about before I walked in?" Chris asks me. I grin and explain. He shakes his head at me and taps my head "kid"

"What?! I'm still only 19 you know!!"

"And a doctor too? Wow"

"Hard work I guess," I say "but I'm twenty on the twenty-eighth of this month,"

"Hurry up you two!" Luke yells

I start walking towards the table faster but Hal grabs my hand "I'm glad your feeling better now," I smile.

                                                   ★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★

          If I'd ever thought that preparing such a huge party in Edward's family mansion would be the most difficult thing in the world, I was wrong. Cleaning was the worst part. So how did I get stuck here doing the chores? I fell for Brit's and Roger's goo goo eyes.

      "Edward Salerd I am going to kill you bring you back to life and kill you again!" I yell at Edward , he was the reason Roger and Brit gave me goo goo  eyes after all, he'd forced them and the others to stay and they'd thought that leaving me out of it wouldn't be fun. Twisted jerks! "How  you convinced me to clean this humongous party's humongous mess I'll never know!" I wail at him.

"Aw I love you too!" He teases, I fling the dusting cloth at him and it hits him right on his face bull's eye! I cheer.

"Hey now Ed, don't go telling other girls you love them when I'm right here!" Kate says while picking up her bags, yeah that's right she's leaving! I feel so bad..for liking her fiancé.

Edward's P.O.V

     Jenny Pates, you really need to stop looking so beautiful, because I am hardly resisting my urge to kiss you right now! I had Kate. But she didn't make my heart race. Jen did. If I'd met Jen when I was just a normal high school student and not the heartthrob ,player from Casters I would have asked her out. But I didn't ,I met Jen when I was in a world famous boy band ,engaged to a top celeb that I knew I didn't love and for some reason ...felt that she didn't love me back..really, when my mother dissapeared and I had to live with my manipulative father.

     Oh well Jen, sorry .I can't believe I want to kiss you! I never thought about that before, but seriously I'm an idiot! Thinking about a fan! Jeez I guess I'm just going through a phase. I mean any guy who saw Jen today would want to kiss her!

    Let's just forget about this.....but why did she look like she was crying today?

Jen's P.O.V

      I sigh. "Did you know sighing makes you lose 50 years off of your life?" Ed says cheekily." oh? And who do I have to blame for my shortened life span?" I ask sarcastically "me I guess," he says grinning.

    This is good... this is comfortable, I think to myself as I look at Edward. "Guys! Could you get the spare ladder from the shed?" Luke yells

"I'll get it!" I volunteer.

"No, I need some tools too. You won't be able to carry it all. Eddy! Go with her" Chris cuts in.

Ed hesitates before answering.

                                                ★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★

   It's dark on this side of the mansion, really dark. I can hardly see my own feet. The trees loom darkly over us,the branches letting in only a little of the moonlight. It's beautiful and mysterious. I am thanking god that I borrowed those sneakers from Ed. It's good that Ed decided to go with me to the shed, because A. I wouldn't have been able to find my own way. B. It can seriously be creepy out here on your own. But with Edward next to me...I wasn't afraid.

       I lose my focus on my balance and squeak as I trip, Ed catches me just in time ,he grins cheekily "clutz!...or wait did you do it on purpose to make me catch you?" He teases,clutching his heart and gasping as if he were touched.

"In your dreams Salerd!" I exclaim,and try to move and walk off by myself

" Jeez Jen! Give me your hand already!" Ed says,grabbing my hand. And to think I came here to make this the final test! Hah! That's a laugh! I've failed it oh so miserably!

     "So?" I say "so what?" He asks. So are you okay...you know ,about the fact that your mom isn't here to meet Kate..? But I couldn't ask him that. "So how did you enjoy your engagement party?" I say quickly.

"Frankly?" He asks. I nod.

"I thought I was going to die!" He wails. I grin and pat his back "there there" I say sympathetically

"But...Jen..I know you,that wasn't what you were trying to ask me, so?"

Caught! How did he already know me so well? Well he asked so I'll just voice out my thoughts.."I was going to ask you how you were?" He gives he a confused look "you know...your mom wasn't here at ...your engagement party.." Ed stops walking,his hand doesn't leave mine but his whole frame freezes. I shouldn't have asked.
"I'm sorry! I shouldn't have asked" I say,trying to take my hand out of his. He doesn't let me.

"No..it's okay..but I don't have an answer ...I thought I'd feel dissapointed..but I didn't really feel anything. I wished she was here but it wasn't because of the significance of this engagement party..but because..I miss her...so much Jenny." Ed says, without thinking about it I go over to Ed and hug him. At first he stiffens but then he relaxes. He buries his head in my neck and sighs while holding me back. "It's ok," I say "I am pretty sure that you two will meet again," I whisper .

      I pull away from Edward after a while "come on! The others will wonder what on earth happened to us!" I say enthusiastically. He grins "me, they'll think I lost my way. You,they'll think fell into the lake!"

"Hey!!" I exclaim,playfully punching him on the shoulder.

        We finally reach the shed a few minutes later and Ed turns on the light. I go to the far corner of the room and pick up the small ladder whilst Ed fishes out a large bag and starts putting in some cleaning tools. He stops for a moment and looks at me,looks away,then looks again. "What?!" I exclaim,exapperatably. "Jen...why were you crying...?" He asks me. I thought he hadn't noticed, well he'd certainly been too busy with Kate to care! "Why do you care?" I ask half angrily..half hurt.

"Of course I care! I thought you were embarresed in frontof Kate!" I sigh,was that the only reason ."and I suppose your moment alone with Kate didn't really matter..?!" Why am I getting emotional?! Keep it up Jen and forgetting him will be way more difficult! Ed starts to deny what I just said but I cut him off "you don't have to explain Ed..I am sorry, I didn't mean to get all emotional .... look..I was crying because.." I break off,unsure of what to say next. I was crying because I realised I loved you but could never have you. Yeah that would go well!

"Because I realised ....I couldn't have something ...I really wanted," I say,grinning ,like it was no big deal.

"Is this about Cameron...?" He asks me suddenly. Cameron..? How the heck could this be about my ex? I shake my head "I am over him,thanks to you," I say. Then I grab the ladder and try to hurry past him.

        Ed grabs my hand suddenly,making me drop the ladder, and swings me towards him. Before I knew what was happening,I feel his lips on mine... at first it's just..a touch of lips only,but then he starts kissing me..really. Every nerve of my body wants to kiss him back. My mind goes completely blank..like I've completely lost any self control. I close my eyes for just a second..I don't want to push him away. But you have to Jen! Why? This feels so good..so right! Is it right to kiss another girl's fiancé?! I dont care about that right now..I just want to kiss him back and worry about it later.
                 Edward back me onto the wall and continues kissing me, holding me completely in place. I feel him on me and I also feel any self-control I had slipping away. Jen! Pull away now!!!! He will pull away first! You said you would only care about his happiness! Why are you doing this when you know he's going to end up feeling guilty!!?? I realise what I'm doing at last and push away before I have time to reconsider my thoughts.

     "I am so sorry," I say,before grabbing the ladder and running out of the shed. He was the one who kissed me! But I was about to let go of my self control! God! Who knew kissing one person could cause all those...fireworks in my head! Why would he kiss me though? Is it possible that..he wanted me? No that couldn't be. Because Ed Salerd always gets what he wants and if I were on that list then I would most definetly know about it!

      My head is spinning...it was just one kiss! Just a simple kiss! That's all it was and can be! You and he can never be! Any girlfriend of his always deals with hate from his fans! And Kate who loves him..how could I face her? Stop thinking about how his lips felt on yours! Jenny! Snap out of it! You may love him but you have to snuff him out of your head and loving how it felt when he kissed you does not help!

     I reach the house..uh..mansion and run in to find Hal. "Where's Ed?" Luke asks me

"He..uh..got a phone call from Kate and told me to go ahead." I lie quickly. "Hal!!!" I yell.

"Jeez woman calm down! I know I'm to die for but -" Hal stops in mid sentence

"What's wrong ??" He asks immediately, wow was I that obvious. I grin "nothing nothing...but I really need to go home now..so could you give me a lift..please?" He nods. The other three nod too,obviously picking up on the fact that something was wrong.

       Ed walks in just then but Hal quickly grabs my hand and takes me out.  We don't speak at all till the car parks in front of my  house and I'm grateful for that. "Thank you for the ride," I say and start to get out of the car. "You like Ed don't you?" I stop in my tracks and turn to face him "whaaat?" I drawl.

"Don't deny it Jen..I already know. I saw you that day,in the kitchen," I sigh. Hal already knew huh?

"I'm sorry Hal. Yeah I do like him..but it'll pass. I'm not stupid. I know he is not for me...do the rest of the boys know?" It's Hal's turn to sigh.

"Yeah,they all have suspicions, but Luke knows."

"Ed doesn't have the slightest idea right?" Hal shakes his head.

" Good ..good," is all I can say.

"Jen..everyone who has ever fallen for him has ended up broken...so it's best you forget him right now." He says.

I nod "don't worry Hal, I'm pretty sure I'll get over him soon enough." Hal grins.

"Goodnight," I say

            After Hal left, I organized my thoughts while taking a shower. I had myself convinced that forgetting him would be..easy. I also decided to avoid him..for now.

                                                   ★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★

           The next day,I stood outside the hospital during my free time. A loud honk caused me to jerk away from my daydreaming. I turned around to find Edward waving at me. Before I knew what I was doing I turned and practically ran into the hospital. I got a text message a few minutes later. Come out now!!! I know you saw me. I didn't want to talk to him right now.I can't I am VERY busy. I type back. Please Jen. No! Sorry gotta go. And I shut my phone.

       When I leave the hospital in the next hour,I don't see Ed's black rover,but I do see Luke's electric blue car. I tap on the window and Luke opens it grinning,"hey"

"Hey yourself! What are you doing here?"

""Get in"

"Okay."

        "I heard about you liking Edward," I sigh and nod, "do you love him?" I turn away and nod."Jen one thing you need to know is that Ed..always hides his feelings when it matters. I don't think he has ever loved anyone..romantically, since.." Luke drops off.

"Since his mom dissapeared," I finish for him. Luke blinks at me "he told you?" I nod. "For your information I will support you and Ed. Because ... Ed..never mind,"

"Thanks Luke but Ed will never see me that way and let's face it..I'm not the kind that goes after celebs." I answer. Luke nods. "It may be hard but.." I nod.

       After Luke leaves I meet Hal. I tell him about my meeting with Luke, and we get into easy conversation. I laugh easily and Hal and I drive to the KFC, and host a tournament on who can eat the most spicy chicken. I won. "Jen! You are a monster!" Hal exclaims, I laugh and do a victory punch. "The others should be here in a minute," Hal says, I nod. Luke Chris and Roger were going to be here in a few minutes.

"Up for more spicy chicken" I ask teasingly

"Go die" Hal grumbles. I laugh.

                     Three guys walk in wearing hoods and cold masks,they come in and sit in front of us "who the heck are you?" I ask, before I can stop myself. All three of them give me hurt faces and Hal starts laughing "Jen!!! I am genuinely hurt! How could you not know me?!" Purple hood speaks, I see the twinkling blue eyes and realise who the 'hoods' were. Mentally slapping myself I laugh.

       "One more!!!" Hal yells "you can do it Jenny!" We're playing spicy chicken again and it's down to me and Luke ."No!!!! Luke you have to win!!!! I have fifty dollars on you!!" Chris exclaims. "Jen baby make me fifty dollars richer!!!" Hal says. "Not helping" I mumble through a mouthful of chicken."Going one! Going twice!...JENNY WINS!!!" Roger yells .

        "Water!" Luke and I gasp together. After drinking two glasses of water each in one gulp,the two of us managed to find our voices. Chris glares daggers at Luke "what?!" He finally exclaims "I didn't ask you to bet on me!"

"Come on Chriiiissss...! Cough it up!" Hal says stretching his hands out. When Chris finally pays up Hal hugs me and pulls out his phone taking a group photo. "Don't you guys have work?" I ask them. They each look at each other then at their watches then again at each other then at me and at exactly the same time they go "oh crap!" And all I could say was "uh...jinx?"

                                                     ★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★

       I got off early that day and grabbing my backpack and the neurology text book Samantha had loaned me. The minute I stepped out of the building,I spotted Hal's red convertible, I grinned and walked over to the red convertible and opening the passenger's side got in "hey Hal missed me already?" I asked jokingly, then turned around to face him in the drivers seat, my breath catches as my eyes find the light green eyes that weren't my friend Hal's but....Edward's.

       "Looks like you aren't busy when its about Hal" Edward says angrily. "Why do you care? Moreover why are you even here?" I ask,equally angrily."I just want to talk," Ed says."we'll talk later," I say enthusiastically and make a motion to get to the door. But Edward started up the car causing me to jerk back into position "what are you doing?!" I exclaim "kidnapping you," he answers,using the line I'd used that day,ironic.
      Ed keeps driving and I keep stubbornly pouting. The car jerks to a stop in front of...oh god. My secret place."you can stop pouting now" Ed says, I don't stop."oh for Pete's sake!" Edward exclaims "look I'm going to try to make it through those brambles and I'm pretty sure I won't be able to make it but if you help me....look I just want to talk." I ignore him fine let him break his neck if he wanted to! See if I care! This is no longer a matter of forgetting him..its a matter of PRIDE!!!
       Ed walks over to the brambles. He can't be serious! He pulls apart the first one is he nuts?! Even I have trouble through it! He starts to go in. Oh curses! I open the door and go to him ,he grins triumphantly. I sigh and take his hand.

       When we finally make it into the clearing he doesnt let my hand go. "Well?" I ask him. He sighs "Jen I'm sorry for kissing you..I don't know what came over me..I couldn't help kissing you..I am so sorry, if I'd known this would happen afterwards I wouldn't have ki- done that to you." I sigh. What had I been expecting?...not this. A small part of me had wanted him to say...ugh! It doesn't matter.
"It's alright..Ed. I should have pulled away faster than that. I'm sorry too" I say

"So can we stop being awkward now?"

"Can you never kiss me again?" I ask. He nods and I grin. Never to kiss again huh? I can't help but feel a little sad.
"Then yes" I answer. Edward Salerd..I love you so much it hurts but I guess this is it huh?

             I sat there with Edward for a long time in companionable silence. "So how did you enjoy the night with the celebs?" Ed asks me. I clasp my hands together and paste a goofy grin on my face "ooooo! It was Sooo amazing!! I got to meet Selena!!! And and..oh god!!!" I say doing an over exaggerated fan girl imitation. Ed laughs "seriously?" I laugh along with him

"It was good. I got to dance so many times and with partners," I answer seriously.

            Ed stays silent "bet you wished Cam was there!" He says teasingly. An idea flicks across my mind, what if I pretended that I liked someone else? It would make sure he never realises I love him..do I really want him not to find out..?  Yes! I can't let him find out,not with his feelings for Kate. I don't let myself think about it. "Not Cameron....but somebody else.." I answer him at last.

"No way! Now you have to spill!" Ed exclaims after quickly hiding a dark frown that flicked across his face.

"I kinda like this other guy." I say,spinning lies.

"Who?"

"I..uh..can't tell you,cause..you..uh..know him!"

"Okaay. Them describe,"

"Uh...he's good looking, light,curly hair...has a amazing smile and makes me feel beautiful and I ...love him." I say,describing Edward. Obviously though, guys are so dum they don't get it.

"He sounds like a really great guy,"

"He is" I say without taking my eyes of Edward.

"Well I'll support you two k?"

"Thank" oh boy if only you knew the meaning of those words.
"I'll  definetly help you two out,"

"Yeah thanks," boy oh boy you have noooo idea what you're signing up for!!

"Anyway!what about you and Kate?" I ask,firmly steering the conversation to safer waters.

Did I just imagine it or did Ed freeze up for a moment before answering?

He assured that everything was perfect in paradise but my gut instinct told me it wasn't .

I could however see that Edward genuinely cared about Kate,he seemed to trust her a lot . I smiled to myself.

        After we realised that the sun had begun to set we set out on our way. Edward didn't let go of my hand until we reached the car. I fell asleep that evening..on Edward's shoulder.. again. I'd always thought that shoulders were uncomfortable ,stiff place to sleep on....funny how soundly I could sleep on Edward's shoulder...

      When I finally awoke I found Edward's head leaning slightly on mine. His eyes were focused on a book in front of me. I shifted my head slightly to get a better look and realised that the book was none other than my textbook. From the looks of things Ed had probably had been reading for quite a while. His phone rung just then and I quickly closed my eyes pretending to be asleep.

"Hi Kate," he answered "A date now?" H e whispered. Apparently hoping not to wake me.

"I'm sorry sweetie but I can't make it immediately ....maybe in an hour."

He ended his call and I felt his arm gently go around me and pull me closer. It was so comfortable that in those moments I didn't want to move at all. Eventually I did though.

      "Hey...morning, sweetheart" he said smilingly. Sweetheart? Let's just pretend he truly meant me for now. I grinned,"is your shoulder asleep yet?"

"Nah...but a few more minutes and it might have been," he joked.

        After that we sat there in silence. It was peaceful. Not the awkward,cut by a knife silence but peaceful,happy silence. At one point I felt warmth on my fingers,ignoring it I sighed then ,growing curious I looked towards the source of the warmth only to find Edward's fingers gently placed on my own. He faced the window and firmly averted his eyes from mine. I left my hand in that position and relished the warmth.

                    ★★★★★

        I stretched myself on my bed and stared up to the ceiling. Like a book, I opened all my memories with Edward and I let my heart race whilst thinking about him. I poured over each memory with an eager smile on my face. Then I imagined him next to me,propped up on his elbow on my bed,smiling at me. Tossing over I sighed.

      Edward Salerd...loving you..is impossible. Because no matter where I turn I'm the one with the most to lose. I'm the one with the heart to be broken. And I'm the one who's going to be rejected. Falling for you was a mistake. Whatever falls will break. And I will not be broken ever again! Not even if breaking is so tempting...

           Click! That's the sound a lock makes. My imaginary lock on this book...let's just hope it holds fast. The awkwardness was cleared. A promise was made. And now a lock has been fastened. A lock specially designed to keep my heart safe...

Guys I'm begging you please vote!!! Sorry I know I'm greedy! Love you guys for reading all the same!!