Chapter 42: (Aaira's pov)

As I touched his hand, I tightened my grip gently. Jungkook's eyes fluttered open slowly, and I was taken aback, I was caught holding his hands, he might jerk my hand away. I could see the exhaustion and pain etched into his features, I tried to maintain a comforting smile, hoping to ease his distress.

For a moment, he studied my face intently, as if searching for something beyond the surface. I held my breath, as he kept staring at me. He attempted a small smile, a gesture that seemed almost painful in its effort. I couldn't help but look down.

But then, without warning, his expression shifted dramatically. A flash of frustration and anger crossed his face, and he abruptly jerked his hand away from mine. I knew it was going to happen, I was prepared for it.

Jungkook: Get your hands off me.

Even though i had prepared myself for any outcome like this. My heart sank at his rejection, and I struggled to hide the hurt that flared up inside me.

I pulled my hand back slowly, feeling a sharp pang of disappointment. I swallowed hard, trying to maintain my composure. I had come to him with only the intention of offering comfort, and yet, my presence seemed to provoke more pain than relief.

Aaira: I'm sorry. I just wanted to help.

My voice was barely more than a whisper, tinged with sadness. I looked at him, trying to read the secrets in his eyes. Jungkook's gaze shifted away, and he grimaced in pain.

Jungkook: I don't need your help.

His tone was bitter, and there was a hardness in his eyes that spoke of deep-seated resentment. I could see that the injuries and the recent events had left him feeling raw and vulnerable, and he was struggling to reconcile that with the person he saw in front of him.

The wounds were serious and needed tending. I knew I had to push past my own hurt and continue to care for him, even if he made it clear that he did not want my presence.

I turned back to the bedside table and picked up the mug of herbal drink. There was a light knock on the door, Jungkook hummed in response, the door slightly opened, it was seokjin. He stand by the threshold, as I approached Jungkook carefully, trying to offer him the drink without intruding on his personal space.

Aaira: This might help. It's a herbal blend I made for you.

I set the mug gently on the table beside him, hoping that he might at least accept the gesture of care. His eyes flickered to the mug, but he did not reach for it. Instead, he lay back against the pillow, he was clearly exhausted and irritated.

Seokjin, who had been observing from the doorway, stepped into the room with a look of concern. He glanced between Jungkook and me, his frustration evident.

Seokjin: Jungkook, you need to take care of yourself. The wounds won't heal properly if you don't get some rest and nourishment.

Jungkook: I don't want her near me.

He was curt, but there was a note of weariness that suggested he was too drained to continue the argument. Seokjin's eyes met mine, and he gave a resigned nod, clearly understanding the difficulty of the situation.

Seokjin: Aaira, thank you for preparing the drink. I'll take care of things from here.

He approached Jungkook's bed and carefully took the mug from the table. He helped Jungkook sit up slightly and offered him the herbal drink. Jungkook took it reluctantly, his face still set in a scowl but showing a hint of gratitude.

I watched silently, as I took a step back, allowing them space to interact without my presence. Seokjin spoke soothingly to Jungkook, encouraging him to sip the drink, I could see that there was a glimmer of acceptance in Jungkook's eyes, even if it was small.

I decided to give Jungkook some privacy, without me. As I slowly made my way to the door, I opened the door to leave, I glanced back at Jungkook one last time.

Aaira: If you need anything, I'll be nearby.

I said softly, my voice carrying a note of earnestness. Jungkook did not respond, but Seokjin gave me a grateful nod. I closed the door quietly behind me and made my way to my own room.

I entered my room and sank onto the edge of the bed. The room, now bathed in the gentle light of the morning sun, I stared blankly at the wall, my thoughts swirling with memories of times before everything had changed. I found myself reminiscing about the days before August 16, 1818-the days when everything seemed simpler, when life felt more stable and less fraught with the pain and confusion that had since engulfed us.

Back then, things were not perfect, but they were manageable. We had our share of disagreements, moments of strife, but we were together. We were a unit, supporting each other through every challenge, facing each new day as a team.

The memories of those days brought a bittersweet smile to my face. I remembered the laughter, the quiet moments of companionship, and the way we used to lean on one another without hesitation. There was an unspoken understanding between us, a bond that had once seemed unbreakable. We had our flaws, but those imperfections were part of what made our relationship real and genuine.

As I lay back on the bed, I thought about how everything had shifted since that fateful day. What had gone wrong? How had we gone from being so close to being so estranged and pained? I couldn't pinpoint a single moment that had triggered this change, but rather a series of events that had gradually eroded the foundation of our relationship.

It was as if a veil had been drawn over our once-clear vision, obscuring the path we had once walked together. The more I tried to understand, the more elusive the answers seemed. The pain of seeing Jungkook in such distress and his subsequent rejection of my help only deepened the sense of loss that had settled within me.

I closed my eyes, trying to shut out everything. I wished I could turn back time, undo the mistakes, and mend the rifts that had formed between us. But that was not possible. All I could do now was hope for some semblance of healing, both for Jungkook and for myself.

But for now, I allowed myself to rest, hoping that a new day might bring with it a glimmer of hope and a chance for reconciliation.

***

Another week had passed since the confrontation with Jungkook. His injuries were slowly healing, and although his demeanor had softened somewhat, the tension between us was still palpable. I found myself constantly worrying about him, as i set on the dresser and opened my journal, i begin to write.

"
Dear journal,

Suah noona's warnings about my own health had become a regular part of my days. Her concern for the child growing inside me was unrelenting. She urged me to take better care of myself, reminding me of the importance of my well-being for the sake of our unborn child. But, I found it difficult to prioritize my own needs.

One evening, after a particularly taxing day, Suah noona confronted me with a stern look. Her worry was evident, and it was clear that her patience was wearing thin.

Suah: "Aaira, you must listen to me. You're pushing yourself too hard. Your health is just as important as Jungkook's."

I tried to brush off her concerns, but she was relentless. When she saw that I wasn't heeding her advice, she took a different approach. She approached Jungkook, speaking with him about my condition and the importance of my well-being.

I'm not sure about this, but for sure Suah noona had shouted on him that day, she was angry when she left the room, but i was glad that she talked to him about us. Thought, no more I wanted to force Jungkook in this relationship but.

I noticed a change in Jungkook after that. He began showing a more genuine concern for me. His usual curt responses softened, and he seemed to make an effort to check on my health. It was a small shift, but it was significant given the emotional distance we had maintained for so long.

Our interactions, though still cautious, began to include more small conversations. Jungkook made an effort to speak to me with a semblance of kindness, and I reciprocated in kind. The conversations were often about mundane things-how my day had gone, or updates about his recovery-but they were a step toward mending the rift between us.

His words, though simple, carries sincerity that hadn't been present in our interactions for a long time. There were small gestures, but it was a sign that perhaps, despite everything, we were beginning to find our way back to some semblance of understanding.

As the days went by, Jungkook started to show a new concern for me. It began with simple questions like whether I had eaten anything. Each time he asked, there was a clear urgency in his voice that was different from how he used to act.

Jungkook: "Have you eaten today?"

He would ask, looking at me closely, as if checking for signs of tiredness or worry. It was clear that he really cared, and his questions showed that he was trying to take responsibility for both of us. Jungkook's concern didn't stop with my meals. He also became interested in what I did each day. Every evening, he would ask.

Jungkook: "What have you done today?"

His voice would be gentler than before, and he seemed genuinely interested in my daily life beyond just the immediate situation. I would tell him about the small things I did, like household chores and errands. Although our talks were short, they showed he was making an effort to reconnect with me through these everyday details.

Our interactions began to improve, even though we still had unresolved issues. Jungkook made an effort to start conversations with safe, non-conflict topics, trying to create a more comfortable environment for us both.

I also tried to engage positively, responding with as much warmth as I could. These small conversations, while brief, felt like small steps toward healing our relationship. Although we were still far from fixing everything, these moments were a hopeful sign of improving our connection.

Fortunately,
Jeon Aaira.

"

I took a deep sigh as i closed my journal, i stared at my reflection, no matter how hard we tried to mend out bond, something was really wrong in my eyes, in my heart, in my soul. I took a deep sigh as I stared at my journal.

Later, I glanced at my reflection in the mirror across me. The morning light, filtered through the curtains, cast a pale glow that seemed to highlight the weariness etched into my features. My face was thinner, with hollowed cheeks that bore witness to the strain I had been under. The lines around my eyes seemed more pronounced, giving me the appearance of someone who had weathered too much suffering.

The pregnancy, which should have imparted a healthy glow, instead seemed to make me look even more drained and depleted. There was no radiant shine in my eyes, only a dullness that reflected the fatigue I felt deep within.

My thoughts were interrupted by the sound of the closet door opening behind me. I turned my gaze slightly from myself to the reflection behind me, and there, in the mirror's reflection, I saw Jungkook standing at the threshold.

He looked at me, as he gave me a smile. Which was both familiar and foreign. Despite his own struggles and injuries, he seemed to be focusing on me now, Why. What must have changed after his confrontation with Suah noona ? I attempted a weak smile, hoping to convey that I was okay, but it felt forced and lacking in warmth.

Jungkook approached slowly, his footsteps were light against the floor. As he moved closer, he stood behind me, and our reflections came into view. I could see his gaze softened as he took in my appearance. His eyes lingered on me with an intensity that made me self-conscious.

I tried to muster a bit of strength, standing a little straighter, but it was clear that the effort was taxing. His presence behind me was a gesture, how much he had changed.

His hand reached out, lightly touching my shoulder, a gesture that was both comfog and disquieting. I can't help but stare at both of us still in the reflection.

Jungkook: Aaira, you don't look well. What happened?

His question, though simple, but it was more than enough for me. I turned slightly to look at him, but the exhaustion in my eyes must have been evident. I wanted to respond, to reassure him that I was fine, but the truth was that I felt anything but okay. The energy that once fueled me seemed to be dwindling, and every day felt like a battle to keep going.

His gaze didn't waver; he continued to watch me with a deep-seated worry that was new and unfamiliar. It was as if he could see through the thin veneer of my attempts to appear strong. The vulnerability I felt in that moment was overwhelming, and I realized that perhaps he, too, was struggling cause of me.

He took a step closer, closing the distance between us. His hand, still resting lightly on my shoulder, began to move in a soothing, gentle caress. I could feel the warmth of his touch through the fabric of my dress, and it contrasted sharply with the coldness that had settled over me.

His breath was warm against my neck as he leaned in, his voice was soft but filled with concern. I can't help but look down.

Jungkook: Did you eat?

He asked, I Just nodded slowly, my throat was tight. The simple question was genuine care that I hadn't expected, given our recent interactions. I wasn't sure if it was the fatigue or the emotional strain that made my response seem so inadequate, but I could only manage a faint, tired nod.

Jungkook: You should be resting, then. What are you waiting for?

I didn't respond immediately, my eyes still locked on our reflection in the mirror. The reflection showed me standing there, looking drained and fragile, and Jungkook behind me, his arms now wrapped around me in a hesitant embrace.

Jungkook: You've been pushing yourself too hard. I can see it. You should take care of yourself.

His voice was softer now, almost as if he were speaking to himself as much as to me. His words carried regression and a deep concern that touched me deeply. I was unable to hold back the tears that threatened to fall.

Jungkook: Go sleep.

I blinked at his reflection, trying to process his words. My mind was full of the pain and exhaustion that had become. The thought of resting, of letting go of some of the burdens I had been carrying, was both daunting and relieving.

Jungkook: Don't work anymore, okay ?

His arms tightened around me slightly, offering a comforting pressure that made me feel safe, even if only for a moment. The sincerity in his voice made it clear that he meant what he said, and it was a rare glimmer of the man I had once known.

The question was not about if I forgive him or not, am I even in a place to feel hurt, am I even in a place to forgive? Even if I am, then why can't I see it, why am I always guilty for everything that happens in these big walls. Why am I to blame always, I can't help but feel suffocated by everything.

Despite the feelings within me, I found myself unable to resist the comfort of his embrace. I slowly turned in his arms, facing him more directly. My eyes met his, and I saw the depth of his concern reflected back at me. It was a look that spoke of shared pain, of a desire to mend what had been broken.

What had changed that night, am i in the place to question it ? I nodded again, this time more firmly, acknowledging the truth in his words. My voice was a mere whisper, barely audible.

Aaira: I'll... I'll rest.

His expression softened, and he guided me gently toward the bed. He helped me settle down, ensuring that I was comfortable. The gesture was tender and careful, as I lay down, Jungkook sat beside me. He didn't say much more, but his actions spoke volumes. His touch, his concern, and his willingness to support me without reservation were more than words could convey.

I closed my eyes, trying to focus on the soothing rhythm of his presence beside me. Jungkook's hand continued its gentle pats, patting my shoulders. As his warmth enveloped me, the exhaustion that had gripped me so tightly began to relent. Gradually, the world around me softened, and I fell into a deep slumber.

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"I'm bewildered, why are you different now, and what caused this sudden shift? I don't understand what changed and why you're suddenly different. You broke me, making me like a puzzle, and now you're trying to put the pieces back together."

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