Content Warning: This chapter contains themes of self-harm and intense scenes, including sexual content. Please read at your own risk and ensure you are in a safe space to engage with these subjects.

Chapter may contain mature content if you're not interested in this you can skip the parts, there's one warning given for extra mature content but for the rest i hope you don't feel uncomfortable. If so you're free to skip. Thankyou.
Sincerely, 
ParkAaimin.

Chapter 13: (Aaira's pov)

The next morning, I woke up feeling gentle kisses on my skin. Jungkook was softly kissing my neck, his hands moving down my body, giving me chills. His touch was gentle and caring, as if he were trying to erase the bruises and scars from the night before.

Jungkook: Good morning, my love.

He murmured against my skin, I turned to face him, his eyes meeting mine with a softness that took me by surprise. There was no trace of the anger or jealousy that had consumed him last night. Instead, they were so soft.

Aaira: Good morning.

I replied, my voice still groggy from sleep. I reached up to touch his face, my fingers tracing the lines of his jaw. Jungkook leaned into my touch, his eyes closing briefly. When he opened them again, there was something in his gaze that made my heart skip a beat.

Jungkook: I'm sorry, Aaira.

He said quietly.

Jungkook: For everything.

Aaira: I know.

I whispered back,

Aaira: I know you're sorry.

He nodded, his smile softening further as he pulled me closer.

Jungkook: I want to make things right between us, Aaira. I don't want to hurt you anymore.

I just nodded, I had no answer to this statement. He pressed his forehead against mine, his breath warm against my skin, as he sniffed all my face.

Jungkook: I promise you, I'll do better. I won't let my jealousy get the better of me.

I nodded again, and Jungkook's lips found mine in a gentle kiss, his hands cradling my face as if I were something precious. His touch was warm, yet there was an intensity that made my heart race more than its normal pace.

As he pulled back slightly, his breath mingled with mine, Jungkook's nose brushed against my skin. He began to sniff all over my face, his eyes closed, and I felt a shiver run down my spine. There was a different tension in the air, an electric current that made my skin tingle and my breath hitch.

His breath was warm against my skin, and the intimacy of his actions made me feel exposed in the most exhilarating way. His hands continued to hold my face, his thumbs gently caressing my cheeks as he explored every inch of me with his nose trailing against my skin.

I could feel his breath hitching slightly, his own arousal evident in the way he was breathing. His lips brushed against my temple, then my forehead, and he let out a soft sigh. I couldn't help the soft groan that escaped my lips. Jungkook's response was immediate; he nuzzled his nose against my jawline, his touch more insistent, more demanding.

His nose continued to rub against my skin, I could feel the tension building between us. His hands slid from my face to my shoulders, then down my arms, his touch leaving a trail of fire in its wake. He held me tightly, his body pressing against mine, and I felt as if I were melting into him.

Jungkook's breath was hot against my neck, his lips tracing the curve of my throat. His breathes followed, planting soft kisses along my skin, and I let out another groan, my body arching towards him.

His hands found their way to my waist, pulling me closer, and I could feel the rapid beating of his heart against my chest. His lips continued its exploration, moving lower to the hollow of my collarbone, and I gasped at the intensity of the feeling.

Smut warning:

Suddenly, he started pulling at the robe of my gown, leaving my chest exposed in front of him. Without a warning, he attacked my chest like a hungry beast, sucking onto it with a fervor that left me breathless. I couldn't breathe; I kept moaning, the sensation was too much. I tried to push him away as the force became too much, but he looked up at me, his eyes dark with desire.

Aaira: Please.

I managed to gasp out between moans, my voice was trembling.

Jungkook: Please, don't stop me today.

He murmured in between kisses, he was still playing with one of my breasts with his hands and the other was a toy to his lips. I felt his fingers brush against my skin as he shed his clothes, his body pressing against mine with a burning heat.

He never once left my breast, his lips still working their magic on my sensitive skin. His other hand moved to play with my other breast, again, squeezing and kneading, his fingers teasing and pinching.

He positioned himself between my legs, he slapped my tights to ask for space for him to settle in between. Slowly, he began to enter me, his movements were careful as he tried to find space. I was tight, so tight for him, and the pressure was intense. He kept moaning softly, he couldn't find the right space there, I was so small for him, currently. The sound vibrating through my body. His mouth remained on my breast, sucking and licking, driving me wild with need.

As he finally managed to push deeper, he still didn't thrust, letting me adjust to his size. His hand on my other breast continued its ministrations. The intimacy of the moment was too much to bear, his body pressed against mine, his breath hot against my skin.

Jungkook's moans grew louder, mingling with mine as he tried to hold back. He stayed still for a moment longer, his lips and hands never ceasing their caresses, allowing me to acclimate to the sensation. Then, slowly, he began to move, his thrusts gentle at first but gradually becoming more insistent.

Jungkook left my breast, sitting back for a brief moment. He gazed at me, huffing for air, he looked down for some more moments as if regaining his energy. For those two seconds, everything was still, our heavy breaths were the only sound. Then, he started thrusting himself into me.

Jungkook: You're so tight, Aaira.

He groaned,

Jungkook: I missed this... missed you.

At first, his movements were slow and measured, But as he continued, the intensity increased. He began to move faster, his hips driving into mine with a force that left me gasping. I reached out, gripping the nightstand for support as our bed creaked beneath us, Jungkook's moans grew louder.

Jungkook: Aaira.

He groaned, His hands gripped my hips, pulling me closer with each thrust, His pace quickened, and I felt my body responding to him.

Jungkook: God, you feel so good.

He murmured, his hands gripping my hips to pull me closer with each movement.

Safe zone:

Jungkook: Jeon Aaira.

He whispered between breaths,

Jungkook: I missed this so much.

I closed my eyes, surrendering to the moment, but when I opened them again, my gaze landed on the mirror across the room. For two brief moments, I lost myself in my reflection, seeing Yn's face staring back at me. The realization hit hard-if I looked like her, did that mean he had done this with her too?

Suddenly, tears filled my eyes, streaming down my cheeks as my body and thoughts gave in. Each sob shaking me to my core, my body was not the only thing trembling, my heart was shivering too. Jungkook immediately sensed the change and stopped.

Jungkook: Aaira, are you okay?

He asked, His hands froze on my hips, and he searched my eyes for answers. But I couldn't respond. I couldn't tell him the reason behind my tears, I couldn't even look at him. I simply shook my head, unable to find my voice. His brow furrowed with concern as he reached up to wipe my tears with his thumb.

Jungkook: Please, talk to me. I don't want to see you like this.

He pleaded, Gently, he took my hands caressing them, but when he saw there was no use, he let go of them, as he held my face instead, trying to make me look at him. But I couldn't meet his gaze; my body was trembling.

── ᯓᡣ𐭩 ── "The mirror no longer showed my face but the remnants of my shattered trust."── ᯓᡣ𐭩 ──

In an instant, He quickly pulled away from me, wearing his clothes and adjusting mine as he tried to create space.

Jungkook: Just please, Aaira.

He kept asking,

Jungkook: What's wrong? You can tell me anything.

But the words wouldn't come. I felt lost, Seeing me shiver, Jungkook stepped closer again, his hands gentle.

Jungkook: I'm right here. I won't leave you. Just let me in.

With a deep breath, I finally managed to look up at him, my eyes glistening with unshed tears.

Aaira: I... I don't know how to explain.

I whispered, Jungkook nodded.

Jungkook: You don't have to. Just know I'm here for you, please talk it out to me.

We stayed like that for a while, wrapped in each other's arms, I was still sniffing lightly, I don't know why I was feeling this way, I've never felt like this before in my life. But now i couldn't imagine losing him at all.

As the morning light filtered through the curtains and casting a soft glow over us, I was a little more stable than before now. In that moment, it felt like the world outside didn't exist, as he had already embraced me tightly, not letting the space for anything or anyone else in between, like it was just the two of us against everything.

Eventually, Jungkook pulled back slightly, his eyes searching for mine, if I was still crying.

Jungkook: Are you hungry? I can make us breakfast.

I smiled at his offer, though i couldn't still smile wholly, my smile was flickering but i tried my best, the simple act of kindness easing some of the fog in my chest.

Aaira: That sounds nice.

He kissed my forehead one last time before getting up from the bed, I just looked at him with my eyes still hurt, his steps were careful as if he were afraid of breaking the fragile peace between us. I watched him as he dressed, entirely now.

Jungkook left the room to make breakfast, I lay back against the pillows, my mind replaying the events of the previous night, and what Happened just moments before, i shouldn't have cried like that, I was wrong at my place, i wonder how must be feeling right now.

I closed my eyes, letting the warmth of the morning sun wash over me, drying the remnants of tears. For now, I would hold on to that hope, believing that things could get better, that we could heal and move forward together, only this was the way that could keep me alive more than just breathing suffocatingly.

I quickly stepped out of bed. My body ached, but I forced myself to move towards the closet. I couldn't stand lying there, consumed by my thoughts. My emotions were raw, and I needed a distraction, anything to break the cycle of my mind replaying thoughts and the painful moments.

I reached for the comb, my hand trembling as I picked it up. I stared at my reflection in the mirror, feeling a wave of disgust all over me. My cheeks were stained with dried tears, and my eyes were puffy and red. Those eyes hurt me, those lips, that nose, everything about my face hurts me. And seeing it made something snap inside me.

Without thinking twice, I hurled the comb at the mirror. The sound of shattering glass echoed in the room, the fragments scattering across the floor like pieces of my broken spirit. I quickly knelt down, my heart pounding, and picked up a shard of glass. I stared at my distorted reflection in the jagged piece, the image only adding to my self-loathing.

I clutched the shard tightly, the sharp edge pressing into my palm. My reflection mocked me, the person I saw in the glass was a mere shell of who I once was. Anger and frustration bubbled up inside me.

Aaira: Why?

I whispered to my reflection, my voice barely audible.

Aaira: Why can't I just be strong? Why do I hate my face so much suddenly?

The tears I had tried to hold back began to flow freely again, mingling with the blood from the cut on my hand. I was tired of feeling this way, tired of the constant pain in my heart and the endless cycle of hurt and regret.

Carefully, I set the shard of glass aside and took another deep breath. I couldn't let the past define me. I had to find a way to rise above it, to reclaim some semblance of control over my life.

Wiping away my tears with the back of my uninjured hand, I slowly stood up. I needed to clean up the mess I had made, both in the room and within myself. As I began to pick up the shattered pieces of the mirror.

But as I stood, my eyes landed again on the broken mirror, I looked at my hands all blooded, I got scared, the glass from my hands fell on the floor. The jagged shards reflected a distorted image of myself in the mirror, I was shocked, what have I done ?

Tears streamed down my face, my figure started trembling, tears still left my eyes as my bloodied hand traced a path across my face, smearing crimson streaks as I tried to hold back the tears. My face grew hot blood red, my vision blurred with rage and fear.

Before I could stop myself, I let out a loud, anguished scream and collapsed to the floor, my knees landed on the scattered glass pieces. The sound echoed through the room, the hallway, or maybe the whole house. The pain, the regret, the hopelessness-it's all too much to bear.

As I again held the piece close to my face, the sharp edge glinting ominously in the light, the blood from my hand flowed freely, staining the floor beneath me, my dress. I looked like a killer.

My breath came in ragged gasps, the desperation in my heart pushing me towards a dark decision, I was feeling the same way again, I coughed for air. I slowly took the piece of glass closer to my face, I had no liking left towards it, i need to get rid of this face, get rid of me. The shard was closer to my eyes, the edge almost grazing my skin, when, Suddenly.

The room burst open, and in an instant, Jungkook was there. His face was a mask of fury and desperation. Without a moment's hesitation, he jerked the shard out of my hand, his grip painfully tight.

Before I could react, he slapped me hard across the face, the force of his sent a shockwave through my body. The sting of his handprint burned on my cheek, but before I could process the pain, his hand connected with my face again, the second slap even harder than the first.

Jungkook: You can't be serious!

He shouted, his voice trembling with anger.

Jungkook: What the hell were you thinking?

He grabbed me by the shoulders and started shaking me, his grip almost bruising.

Jungkook: Do you have any idea what you were about to do? Do you know how much you scared me?

His eyes were wild, he shook me harder, as tears still streamed down my face, mingling with the blood, landing on my white fabric red.

Jungkook: Come to your senses! What would even lead you to do this.

He shouted again, but I was so scared, my body was shivering with the thought of what I was about to do just a while ago, if he wouldn't have came here, would I have harmed myself again ? I had promised myself that I wouldn't ever harm myself again, right ?

The force of his slap still stings through my cheek, bringing me back to the present moment. My face stung, and my vision blurred with tears, I looked up at him, seeing the raw panic in his eyes.

Jungkook: What are you doing, Aaira?

He demanded,

Jungkook: Are... Are you in your senses even ? Say something!

I couldn't find the words to answer him. Instead, I collapsed into sobs, my body shaking with the intensity of my grief. Jungkook knelt down beside me, pulling me into his arms despite the blood and tears.

Jungkook: Shh, it's okay.

He murmured,

Jungkook: I'm here. Shh... Calm down, we will talk about this, hm ? Stay calm.

He hugged me tightly, his own shirt staining with my blood. I could feel his heart pounding against my chest, as if he feared losing me at any moment. The reality of what I had done hit me harder than his slap. How could I have let it come to this?

After a moment when he thought I was a little calm, Jungkook gently lifted me into his arms. He carried me to the bathroom. Once we were inside, he set me down on the edge of the bathtub and turned on the faucet, letting the water run until it was warm.

His hands trembled as he gathered supplies to tend to my wounds: a clean towel, antiseptic, bandages. He knelt in front of me, his eyes focused on my hand, he slowly pulled out the pieces of glass that were left inside.

Jungkook: Hold still.

He instructed softly.

Jungkook: This might sting a bit.

He gently washed the cut on my hand with warm water, his touch as light as if he were handling a fragile piece of glass. He applied antiseptic, his eyes never leaving my wound as he tried to keep his hands steady. I winced at the sting.

Jungkook: You scared me, Aaira.

He whispered,

Jungkook: I thought I was going to lose you.

He wrapped the bandage around my hand with meticulous care. When he was done, he stood up and ran his hands through his hair, his shoulders sagging with relief and exhaustion.

Then, as he looked down, he noticed the bruises and cuts on my knees. His expression darkened again. Without warning, he slapped me hard across the face again. The shock of it left me stunned, my cheek burning with fresh pain.

Jungkook: What were you thinking?

He shouted, his voice echoing in the luxurious bathroom.

Jungkook: Why would you do this to yourself?

He grabbed my shoulders, shaking me slightly as if trying to shake sense into me.

Jungkook: Do you have any idea how much you mean to me? How much it hurts to see you like this? It's killing me, it's not only you who's losing blood it's me losing my soul.

Tears streamed down my face as I tried to process his words, it broke my heart to see him like this.

Aaira: I'm sorry.

I whispered, hoping he would look at me but he was still looking down to my knees.

Aaira: I didn't know how to cope. I felt so lost.

His grip on my shoulders softened, his eyes filling with tears. He pulled me into a fierce hug, holding me as if he could shield me from all the pain in the world.

He pulled back slightly, his hands cupping my face.

Jungkook: Please, promise me you won't do this again. Just don't leave me.

I nodded, as he knelt before me, I sat on the rim of the bathtub, feeling the cold porcelain beneath me as I watched him. He was sitting on the floor, his knees pressed against the cold tiles. With gentle hands, he lifted my leg and placed it carefully on his knee. His touch was warm, yet I could see the tremor in his hands.

As he pulled up the hem of my nightgown, his eyes widened at the sight of the glass shards embedded in my skin. Tears streamed down his cheeks, mixing with the sweat on his brow. I could see him trembling.

His fingers were deft yet delicate as he began to remove the pieces of glass from my leg. Each shard he pulled out made me wince, a sharp intake of breath escaping my lips. He winced along with me, as if he could feel every ounce of my pain. His eyes never left the task at his hand.

Jungkook: I'm sorry.

He whispered,

Jungkook: I'm so sorry, Aaira.

His apology broke something inside me. I wanted to comfort him, to tell him it wasn't his fault, but the words wouldn't come. All I could do was sit there, watching him, feeling the sting of the glass and the burn of his tears on my skin.

He washed the wounds with warm water, He dabbed at the cuts with a clean towel, his hands steadying as he wrapped my leg in a soft bandage, his tears continued to fall. He paused for a moment, his head bowed, his shoulders shaking with silent sobs.

Jungkook: I can't lose you.

He choked out,

Jungkook: I can't. You mean everything to me, Aaira.

Aaira: I'm here.

I whispered,

Aaira: I'm here, Jungkook. I'm not going anywhere. I'm really very sorry, i didn't know what I was doing, I can't live with this pain, I can't.

He nodded, his grip on my leg tightening slightly as he finished bandaging my wounds. When he was done, he looked up at me again. Standing up, he grabbed a clean towel and soaking it in warm water. He returned to me and carefully began to wipe away the blood stains on my face and hands.

Jungkook: Let me help you clean up.

He murmured, Once he had cleaned my face and hands, Jungkook brought a glass of water to my lips.

Jungkook: Drink.

He said. I sipped slowly, the cool liquid soothing my parched throat. After I had my fill, he set the glass aside and scooped me up in his arms, cradling me gently.

He carried me to the bed, He sat me down, arranging the pillows behind me so I could sit comfortably.

Jungkook: Bath after twelve.

He said,

Jungkook: Let the medicine stay on for a while.

I nodded, Jungkook sat beside me, his eyes never leaving my face. His hand reaching out to tuck a strand of hair behind my ear. I leaned into his touch, feeling the warmth of his palm against my cheek. The tears had stopped, completely.

He hurried to the closet and returned with a bowl of warm water and a soft cloth. Sitting beside me on the bed, Jungkook gently dabbed at the wound on my cheek where his slap had left a mark.

His touches were soft, As he cleaned the dried blood stains again, his hands were steady but his eyes betrayed. Tears welled up, streaming silently down his cheeks, reflecting his deep concern and regret. I watched him quietly. Despite everything, I knew his actions stemmed from fear and love, not malice.

He had always been my protector, and now, seeing him so vulnerable, I realized I was his weakness—the one person he feared losing the most. I wanted to reassure him, to wipe away his tears and tell him I would be fine, but the words caught in my throat, I was unable to speak. He still kept pressing the cold towel against my skin in order to provide coldness against my burning cheek.

───────── ᯓᡣ𐭩 ─────────

"I thought my own blood would be the end of my suffering, not realizing it would tear him apart as well. I thought my scars would set me free, never knowing they would chain him in grief."

───────── ᯓᡣ𐭩 ─────────

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