A/N: I'm aware I mentioned this chapter was going to be darker, but given the current state of the election, I figured I'd save it for the next chapter. It's very rare that I make a chapter 'fluffy' without some angst, so enjoy! This highly-anticipated election is so nerve-wracking, so I hope this gives you (U.S. peeps anyways) some relief in the wake of this shitshow.

Let me know what you think! I always enjoy reading your theories, comments, revelations. Thanks for the 7k votes by the way <3

Chapter 45

Simon's POV

Despite sharing eerily identical features, Michael was Vince's polar opposite. Very straight-forward, sure of himself, and from what I've seen, far more empathetic with people than Vince tried to be. Of course, that didn't mean Vince couldn't be those things, but it was refreshing to be around someone that genuinely knew what they wanted.

And as much as I wanted to believe Vince, and understand his concerns, I had no reason to believe Michael was in fact a bad person. I mean Michael had done more for me the last week than Vince had ever done his entire life.

"So, tell me," Michael said after the waitress left the breadbasket. He grabbed a slice of bread, buttering one side. "How has my brother been treating you? I've been so busy with things, I feel like I haven't been able to check up on you."

"Well," I thought about it. Aside from our arguments, it wasn't like he was terrible. Compared to a few weeks ago, or even to back then, Vince had been a bit nicer. And this morning had been pleasant, the fact he decided to stay and sit next to me was a far cry from what he would've done when I first came back.

"Bread?" Michael held out a buttered roll to me.

I mumbled my thanks before answering, "he's gotten better."

He grinned. "Well, that's good to hear. He's not as heartless as I thought."

I gave him an inquisitive look, to which he chuckled. "I'm kidding, mostly. But seriously, I'm glad he's starting to understand how important the bond is. It seems like you two were really feeling it when I walked in."

I took another bite of the bread before humming. "I guess. His wolf hasn't surfaced though, and I don't think it's great that he lowered his dose so quickly."

The waitress came by with our drinks, Michael giving our order, before walking away. He smiled softly before replying, "that's concerning. Has he had any withdrawals?"

"I don't think so," I frowned. "But then again, he tends to avoid me these days. We barely talk to each other, let alone stay in the same room."

I continued, "I don't know. Maybe he's just swamped with work, like he said, but I wish he'd just slow down and relax. It's like once something is happening between us, he suddenly realizes something and walks away as if hadn't happened."

Michael hummed before raising his glass of water to his mouth. "What do you think he realizes?"

"I wish I knew," I sighed. "But it's like he's trying to rush the process, and as much as I want to be mates with him, I don't think he knows what he wants."

"Like his wolf subconsciously wants one thing, and Vince wants another?"

"Maybe. I don't know." I frowned. "I mean that would make sense, I guess."

The waitress came by with our pasta dishes. Michael swirled his fork around before replying, "Well, I would be careful. Even if his wolf wants you, Vince should be on the same page. I'd hate for you to go through with anything if Vince wants something different. Especially if all he has his eyes on is the title."

I blinked, staring down at my dish. "You think he'd do that?"

Michael took another bite of pasta before shaking his head. "After the way I saw him with you this morning, I doubt it. But there's still a possibility that that could be why he's rushing the process. I'd just be cautious."

I knew that could have been a possibility when I first came back, but now I feared what kind of odds were stacked against us, against me. And, looking back on how I didn't really care what he thought, or what Vince wanted, it mattered a great deal now. Despite everything I've been through, I couldn't help but feel that this would've hurt worse if he was just using me for the title. That everything Aspen, Sarah, and the others warned me about were true all along.

But I guess I just had to trust Vince, trust that he was feeling something, that the moon goddess had been right to pair us all along. I mean he had felt the bond, even went as far to look for me, so it must've meant something right?

"Well, feel free to tell me if he's having any withdrawals or causing you problems, I'm sure we could convince him to go easy on the process. Lowering his dose like that can be quite detrimental, and would most likely hurt you in the process as well if he's not careful."

I nodded, still overthinking everything. Michael seemed to notice how lost in thought I was when he placed his hand on mine.

"Let's not think too negatively," he smiled. "Your food's getting cold, love."

"Yeah, you're right." I returned the smile, before taking a bite out of the fettuccine alfredo. It had been a long time since I ate out at a restaurant like this, most places Aspen and I went to were all-you-can-eat places, fast-food, or we'd make our own.

"You want to know something silly?" I asked him after about halfway with my dish. "I don't even really know anything about Vince. Like his favorite color, food, beverage of choice, or even what movie or television shows he likes."

He let out a short laugh. "Well, I would help you out, but my knowledge of my brother only extends to a certain age. His palate has probably changed since I've been back. But if you must know, he was actually a fan of the color purple as a kid. He'd insist it was only lavender that he liked, but honestly, he'd color everything bright purple in those children's coloring books. He was also a sucker for Sprite and fruit punch."

"I feel like those were always a kid's favorite."

"He even liked Barney," Michael chuckled. "It must've been the purple."

"That's hard to imagine Vince watching nowadays."

Michael smiled before returning to his dish. "I do remember him enjoying our mother's carbonara dish. It was the one thing mom enjoyed making for us."

I finished the last bit of pasta before glancing at the menu, finding that the restaurant did in fact serve it. "I'll order him a serving, if that's alright?"

"Of course," Michael said, waving down the waitress. "I'm sure he'll appreciate it."

---

To no surprise, Vince was working in the council room when I got back. He was typing like a madman when I walked in, only paused for a millisecond to glance at me before going back to the laptop. Steeling my nerves, I walked over, putting the take-out box on the desk.

His hand hovered over the keyboard as he stared at the box, then up at me. An awkward couple of seconds passed before I told him, "I brought lunch."

"Oh."

"You should take a break and eat," I pulled out a seat, slowly sitting down. "It's carbonara. Michael said it was your favorite growing up, not sure if it still is though."

"Uh, thanks," he frowned. "I'll eat it later, I really gotta finish this up, then work on some letter."

From this close up, I could see the darkness under his eyes, the way his eyelids looked heavy, even the way his shoulders were slumped further over. I slid the box closer before suggesting, "I could help. Just tell me what to type or whatever while you eat."

He pushed the food back, before nudging his head in the direction of the laptop. "Michael needs a list of the rogues we've helped in the past ten years, along with their medical notes from Chase. And wants them prioritized into who's a good fit for entering the pack. I'm only a quarter of the way there."

"Let me help," I insisted, playing tug and war with the takeout box.

"No," he stressed. "I've gotta finish this by Friday."

I reached over, shutting the laptop closed. "Eat first."

"I'm not even hungry," he scoffed, but I glared at him, pouting childishly. And then, his stomach rumbled clearly through the silence. I smirked, pushing the food in front of his laptop.

He let out a soft laugh, a smile that I rarely saw on his face. He looked so relaxed, so carefree in that inexplicably brief moment. I didn't want that moment to leave, to see all his worries wash away from his face, leave a warm and calm feeling in my chest.

He ran a hand through his hair as he opened the box, the smile still lingering on his face. "Alright, you win. I still have three days to catch up on all this, so I can't be doing this every meal."

"What?" I joked. "Three meals are a minimum. You've gotta catch up on all those skipped ones from before."

"So you've noticed," he laughed before staring down at the food as if lost in nostalgia. "Sarah did the same thing, forcing me to eat my meals, making sure I took breaks and whatnot."

"Oh. Is that so?"

"Uh," Vince seemed to notice my questioning tone. "Sorry. Maybe I shouldn't have said that. Shouldn't talk about her."

"Oh, no," I shook my head, thinking about what I told Michael, about how little I actually knew about Vince. "She meant a lot to you. She knew you a lot more than I do anyway."

"Still," Vince tried to reason, before clearing his throat. "When she did it, it just-it felt different."

"Different," I questioned. "Different how?"

I could sense the nerves running through him as he gulped, looking down at his food. "It just does, I guess."

We stared at the half-eaten carbonara like it held all the answers, but Vince finally continued. "With her, it was just this constant battle of trying to make things the way I wanted, to force something that was obviously not right. My wolf fought me mentally for years, like two magnets repelling each other. Those pills were supposed to help, numb the bond so that I could keep on pretending. And now with the bond partially back, it doesn't feel like a battle anymore. It's like I can finally breathe, finally relax, even if it's just for a moment."

"How does that make you feel?" I asked, keeping my eyes trained on his food, scared that I wouldn't see that smile on his face if I looked up. "That you didn't feel that way with her."

He let out a shaky breath, before saying softly. "I knew it was wrong, obviously. But for a while I was angry. Angry that I couldn't make things the way I wanted. Couldn't change anything. I mean why couldn't it just be her? Why couldn't it have been that simple? Then I started to fear what I've done. Scared that I ruined our lives, ruined hers. And for what?"

I could feel his anxiety rising, his whole body tensing up, his breathing becoming erratic. I moved my hand from the table closer to his, hesitantly reaching over, touching just above his wrist. I bit my lip before telling him gently, "it's okay."

He shook his head, his other hand rubbing the back of his neck. "No, it's not okay. What I did was not okay. You of all people-"

"It's okay to be scared, Vince."

I tugged on his wrist, pulling it into my hands like I did this morning. I could feel his hands shaking in mine, so squeezed it, hoping the warmth and gentle soothing feeling from the bond would calm him down.

"I mean, really? With you, with Sarah. That wasn't right," he sighed shakily before letting out a soft gasp. "And Xavier? I-I really do ruin everything don't I?"

I could feel the dull ache growing, the emotional tirade he was in taking a toll on us both. I gritted my teeth, a million things I wanted to tell him, to reassure him running through my head. If I could shoulder all the negative thoughts he was having, I would. I was so used to it that I'd take it all if I could just feel the calm feeling emanate from him, to see that smile. If it meant he could be happy for a lifetime, I'd take it all.

But I couldn't, so I pulled his hand closer to my chest, hoping he'd let go, let the bond put his worries and anxieties to rest like this morning.

"Not everything," I told him finally, my words barely above a whisper. "I'm still here, aren't I?"

He blinked as if he was experiencing a breakthrough. He let out a breathy laugh, the corners of his mouth turned, and there was that smile again. It was so slight, that to a stranger, it could hardly be called a smile, but it damn near took my breath away.

"Ya," he said softly. "I guess you're right."

"Can we just stay like this?" I said bravely.

He hummed, letting the bond soothe our worries away. I didn't want this feeling to end, and I only hoped he felt the same way.