san wooyoung

10.08.17

much to wooyoung's relief, san's been an absent presence from his company for the last two days. the boy has not shown up to school, as far as he knows, and he's hardly complaining.

however, this doesn't offer him much consolation as he's yet to encounter yeonjun. wooyoung's unsure how he's going to act around the younger, if it's even as big of a deal as he's making it seem in his head. but it shouldn't matter if it isn't a big deal to anyone else. it's a big deal to him, and that should have meant something to yeonjun.

and something feels off. reflecting, he thinks san may have been upset. more than upset- but he can't quite put his finger on it. something more off than the fact he'd just slept with wooyoung's friend.

unfortunately for him, the moment of encountering yeonjun inevitably arrives. perhaps he'll get more answers, though he'd rather get them from san.

the blonde's making his way to lunch with yeosang on his arm, his best friend quizzing him stubbornly on the nature of his reticent and faraway mood. apparently his ability to conceal his emotions is even more fleeting than he thinks.

"just tell what's wrong." yeosang presses, continuing to make guesses. "is it something to do with your parents? i thought you'd be glad to be spending time with them again."

wooyoung sighs, shaking his head slightly with a little smile due to his friend's persistence. "no, it's not that. i..."

he trails off as they near the table, heart jumping when he hears laughter and perhaps a familiar voice. there's no way he's going to be able to maintain a facade around the very catalyst of the reason.

"or is it something to do with san?" yeosang proceeds, and wooyoung freezes. "seonghwa hasn't spoken to me lately, too occupied with san..."

he doesn't finish the thought, noticing wooyoung isn't listening.

"is yeonjun there?" he asks quietly, turning his head to yeosang's ear so not to be obvious.

"yeah, why?" comes the puzzled reply, a protective wariness creeping into the question.

the younger male's lips press together, his eyes casting themselves downwards and flickering nervously. the three of them are close, but yeosang will probably take his side, and wooyoung doesn't want to cause drama.

"i'm actually not hungry." he mumbles apologetically, readying himself to turn and leave as soon as possible.

but yeosang catches his upper arm before he can make an escape, intuition too clever for his own good. his friend knows there is something going on between them, and probably won't let him go until he knows what.

the chatter subsides at their lunch table, so wooyoung figures their friends are probably looking at them standing there unmoving and waiting to find out what's going on. while the blonde keeps his unseeing gaze downward, fumbling with his cane to preoccupy himself, he can feel the force of yeosang's piercing stare that undoubtedly shoots directly ahead.

"did he tell you, then?" yeonjun finally speaks up, the question sheepish. "look, i'm sorry i slept with san. but he came looking for me-"

"wait, what?" mingi's appalled response comes in sync with yeosang's "you did what?"

"no, i didn't tell him." wooyoung states the obvious quietly, raising his head and doing his best to keep his face blank.

"oh." yeonjun sucks in a breath, laughing awkwardly. "now you all know. but it's not like they were dating-"

"does that make a difference?" yeosang interrupts him, and the coldness in his voice surprises everyone. "you knew wooyoung liked him. that they had something going on with each other."

mingi, who knows more about wooyoung's feelings than the rest of them thanks to their conversation from about a month ago, is also getting angrier than expected. "i'm not a violent person, but give me one reason i shouldn't punch you in the face right now."

wooyoung flinches at the conflict that's growing thanks to him, wishing he hadn't been stupid enough in the first place to fall fall for san.

"we hardly hooked up," yeonjun drawls, as if it isn't a big deal at all. sex clearly means different things to different people. "it's not like i want to date him. i just did what any sane person would do, and said 'sure' when choi san booty-called me."

he can't keep his face from falling. what does 'hardly' even qualify as? his grip tightens on the handle of his cane, the pained expression he wears angering yeosang further.

"you could have hooked up with anyone-" the irritated words exit the brunette's mouth at lightning speed, and he stops himself before saying something he'll regret.

"yeo, it's okay..." wooyoung tries, tugging on his friend's arm gently. he doesn't want to argue.

"it's not okay." yeosang snaps firmly, taking them aback again. "in case you forgot, san is best friends with my soulmate. from what seonghwa has told me, there is way more between them than you bothered to think about before climbing into san's bed. i thought you were better than this, yeonjun."

as if he's been summoned, seonghwa is making his way to their table as his soulmate speaks, unbeknownst to wooyoung. their dispute is becoming more noticeable and has drawn his attention. (well, seonghwa has another bone to pick with yeonjun. also unbeknownst to wooyoung.)

the younger isn't concentrating, jumping when someone comes up to them, hovering by his shoulder. "forgive me for eavesdropping, but he's right." seonghwa says, sounding on edge, outnumbering yeonjun further.

despite his last meeting with san, curiosity rises in wooyoung regarding what yeosang had said. he tries not to wonder what san has told seonghwa, but cannot help the hope that kindles.

"i'm sorry," yeonjun apologizes again, but he sounds more impatient than sincere. "if it's any consolation, i didn't even like fucking him. it hardly counts as a hookup."

wait. bile rises in wooyoung's throat, and he feels dizzy. there is no way san lied to him, about anything, on that night. the personal allusions in those most intimate moments still lay heavy on his heart, a weight he can still feel. those weren't lies. however mad wooyoung is at san right now, he's suddenly madder at yeonjun. much madder. but seonghwa whirls on the culprit first.

"that's because you fucking forced yourself on him!" seonghwa suddenly shouts, and everyone stops.

"no, i didn't." yeonjun shoots back defensively. "he called me. san asked for it. why are you getting mad at me? shouldn't you blame san?"

"san's not here, so we're compromising." mingi grumbles, sounding as if he's still ready to throw a punch.

"just calm down." yunho shushes his soulmate mildly, holding him back. "what do you mean, he forced himself on him? it doesn't sound that way. san's the one so far up in his own ass, he didn't stop to think about wooyoung's feelings. he doesn't care about anyone but himself! why are we surprised he's whoring himself around?"

wooyoung feels himself stumble back.  these words, the way they're talking about san— he can't stand it.

"you don't know anything about him." seonghwa snaps, and wooyoung feels yeosang's arm shoot past behind his own back to grab the thwarting male. "i don't like what he did either, so i won't stand here and defend him mindlessly. but you are so out of line. you have no right to say that. no right at all, you don't get to call a victim a whore."

"just go home, man. you're not involved with this." yeonjun speaks up again, his tone biting. "he's right. san's—"

before he can finish, the sound of a fist hitting flesh with a firm crunch rings through the hall. wooyoung's head snaps up, eyes widening. there's a gasp, and the sound of a slap as someone covers their mouth.

"STOP!" he shouts as forcefully as he can manage, the command reverberating through the lunch hall. that certainly quiets them down, a hushed silence falling over their table. he's stepped up, in between, the vulnerable position preventing any more punches being thrown.

"this is between me and san." he tells them firmly, setting his jaw. "i don't know who just got punched, but i fucking hope it was yeonjun."

"it was," seonghwa breathes gruffly, sounding as if he's being held back by the squeaking of shoes on the floor and ruffling of clothing. "and i'll do it again."

wooyoung doesn't want things to get worse, and whacks him with his cane on the leg. contradictory, sure, given he wants to punch yeonjun himself, but he can't stand conflict.

the older yelps, but does not say anything else. the blonde bows apologetically to them before turning around to leave, hearing chaos erupt behind him. his cane taps in front of him, and he focuses on that sound. the tapping is the only sound he hears for a while.

as soon as he decides he's further enough away, wooyoung finds the nearest wall, his back hitting it as he breathes deeply to calm himself. he's never good in arguments, unable to read people's expressions or see their body language. it's just a storm of words raining down on him. his head gets caught up in that hurricane of trying to process everything, and he can't help but get frightened as the next volley of words is unexpectedly shot back.

he really needs to find san. if he's even at school, that is. wooyoung knows a few of his hiding spots, the least he can do is check them.

under the notion that finding san will lead to a clear explanation and things getting magically fixed, wooyoung's not prepared for another argument, once he does find san.

after undoubtedly appearing idiotic calling the older's name out in the bathroom, wooyoung finally receives a reply when he checks the first aid room. the infirmary, whatever. just one of san's favourite hideouts, due to its usual vacancy.

"what're you doing here?" san sighs, sounding tired.

"i'm so sorry," he says suddenly. he has to say something. to get rid of this awkward tension. "about yeonjun."

san steps back falteringly, surprised. "why are you sorry?" he asks, breathlessly.

biting his lip, wooyoung steps forward, eyes shining. "because i get the feeling you didn't want it either." he chooses his words carefully, slowly. "just from what seonghwa said. and what yeonjun said. i'm just sorry you had to go through that." again.

the last word echoes between them, unspoken. wooyoung wants to hug him, but he feels that might not be the best idea. he can't read the situation.

"right," san manages softly, voice cracking. "well, don't be. i don't- i don't need your sympathy."

he scoffs, faltering. he's trying to be nice. "god, you're insufferable." he throws his hands up. "we're back here, again? me apologizing for caring."

"i didn't ask you to care." san whirls on him, walls fully back up. "we can't be together. you can't care about me. i certainly don't care about you."

"liar." wooyoung returns, not missing a beat. "you know— i wish i'd never met you. that way, i wouldn't be losing so much sleep about caring or not caring or any of this bullshit."

he doesn't want to fight with him. but san has this expert way of getting under his skin, even when wooyoung's trying so hard. it doesn't feel worth it, when san so clearly doesn't want to try.

next week cannot come soon enough, marking the start of the summer and a much needed holiday. it will offer him a break from the calamity of high school he's beginning to realize he should not have wished for so naïvely, and more time away from san.

which reminds him of the visit he's due to pay to his aunt this afternoon with his parents. perhaps it's time he takes hongjoong up on that coffee.

whether it's going to be out of spite, or desperate need for a distraction, wooyoung deserves to at least try to be with someone else.

-

riding and rolling oh baby reloading-

i'm obsessed. no thoughts head full of RIDIN'

boring chapter hmshsksm but i have so so many plans for the coming chaps and i'm vry excited ehheheh

xxx

edit: i call everything overrun with dialogue boring but the excitement stands