Charlotte's POV...

It's now the middle of July and It's been about three weeks since Levi went to using the shorter leg brace. He's been doing remarkably well with it too. Surprisingly enough, he's continued to use both crutches to get around in public anyway. He says he can walk faster if he uses both and doesn't have to be afraid of tripping. If that works for him, that works for me.

At home, he ditches the crutches and walks around the apartment while holding to furniture. He even rearranged some items so that he has an easy path from the bedroom to the kitchen while he practices.

I'm convinced he's tried walking without any support at home when I'm not there.  I've noticed a few new bruises on his knees and one on his elbow, probably from loosing his balance and banging into something. There are no complaints of pain, but I catch glimpses of him pausing mid-step and sucking in a breath, waiting for a muscle spasm to pass. Those are expected more often now that he's using his muscles more. Nate & his other new therapist reports that they have a difficult time beginning therapy with Levi in the mornings because his muscles are always so rigid. I'll have to make sure to do some extra stretching with him before we both leave home in the mornings.

Other than that, Levi and I have been going on more dates together and the sex has been great. His mood is pleasant as long as I don't mention the word 'pain' very often or ask about when he uses both crutches.

Mark has been calling almost every day trying to convince Levi to going back to work. Mark says there is a supporting actor role about a character who has a disability, says it would be perfect; Levi can use his crutches. Unfortunately, Levi squashes that idea every time Mark speaks about it. I know it's killing him, not being able to accept any leading roles. I try not to push the matter too hard, Mark already has that job covered.

Today, I'm running late to the rehab center. I told Levi I had to stop at the hospital to check on a few potential patients, which always takes awhile. I'm just taking a slight detour to the pharmacy first. My period is two weeks late. I know after all the radiation treatments I had, getting pregnant might be hard. It's not like we are trying to get pregnant, this isn't the right time for either of us. But when is?

Levi's been texting me like crazy. When ever I'm taking too long at the hospital, he worries. I can't blame him though, considering what's happened in the past.

My phone vibrates again, so I quickly grab a First Response test from the shelf and pay the cashier.

Levi: "Love, where are you? Is everything alright?"

Me: "Yes handsome, I'll be there in 10min. I'll meet you in the pool."

When I get to the rehab, I go straight to the locker room by the pool. After changing into my swim suit, I reach into my bag and pull out the pregnancy test. I may as well do this now and get it over with.

I move to the bathroom stall and start reading the instructions that come with the box. Pee on the stick and then hold it flat while it processes. Wait five minutes before reading the results.

My heart is racing and my hand is shaking while I'm trying to hold the stick steady over the bowl while I squat over it and urinate. Aiming the small stick directly under the yellow stream is more difficult than it looks.

Waiting is always the worst part. What if I am pregnant? Do I tell Levi right away? Do I wait? It's very early and things can happen. Will he be mad? A gurgling sound rumbles from inside my gut, my intestines twisting into anxious knots. I jump into a ready position with my face leaning over the toilet, forcing myself not to hurl. Breathe, Charlotte. In through your nose and out through your mouth, I tell myself.

The timer goes off on my phone. This is the moment of truth. I don't know what I expect to feel when I look at the test. My eyes fixed on the results. I examine the stick longer than I should, but I need to make sure I followed the directions correctly just to be safe.

My emotions nearly get the best of me before I remember to breath again to calm myself down. I discard the stick and walk out to the pool. A mixture of disappointment and happiness combined surging through my body as I walk towards Levi.

The moment I lay eyes on Levi as he swims laps up and down the pool, is all I need to remind myself that all is right in the world again. No matter what, he is mine and I am his. Deep breaths.

I sneak over to the edge of the pool, taking time to gawk over the wickedly gorgeous man swimming in front of me. He steals the air right out of my lungs, causing my head to spin and my mind to get lost in the clouds every time I look at him. It should be a sin to have that kind of effect over someone. His long torso defined by his smooth rippling muscles help him to glide easily through the water. The way his trapezius bulge out with each swim stroke makes me want to continue this therapy session in the bedroom. Besides his mismatched leg muscles, Levi is undoubtedly the sexiest man I know. There is no one else I'll ever want, only him.

"Hey Love," he smirks when he catches me staring at him.

"Hey handsome," I smile at him while lowering myself into the pool.

He swims over to me then wraps his arms around me, bringing his lips down to meet mine.

"How were your meetings this morning?" He asks.

" They were good," I give him my arm, knowing he needs to hold onto something when he walks in the pool.

Once we are at one edge of the shallow end, I move around to his back side and hold onto his hips to keep him steady. I want him to practice standing up straighter and have a more natural posture when he walks. It isn't good for him to always be leaning forward onto his crutches, it's why the muscles in his back are so strained.

Walking with straight posture is difficult for him though, even in the pool and especially without his leg brace to hold his foot in place.

He huffs loudly in frustration after we've only taken two steps forward. It takes a lot of concentration for him to plant his left foot correctly against the resistance of the water, and because of lack of ankle and calf strength, he needs to use his quads and hamstrings more.

My fingertips dig into the groove along the front of his hip bones, my palm spread along his side with my thumbs gripping the back, firmly supporting his hips and helping to correct his gait. After the fourth step, I feel both of his hands quickly grasp onto my wrists as his left leg collapses slightly. "Ugh!" He groans loudly.

"I've got you babe!" I remind him. The way his nerves react from the fear of falling, isn't a pleasant experience for him. The sharp intake of air he forces into his lungs, proves how apprehensive he is.

"You're doing fine Levi, I know this is hard, but you're doing good."

"How is this fine? None of this is fine. I either have to hold onto something all the time or you have to hold me up so I don't fall on my face!" he blurts out.

What has gotten into him today? He's been dealing well with everything the past few weeks. I don't know how to respond and wait for him to continue venting if he that's what he wants to do. My hands gently nudge his hips forward, encouraging him to keep walking.

We almost reach the other end of the pool when his leg gives out again. "Fuck!" He yells.

I move around to stand in front of him this time and guide his arms up to hold around my neck. My arms encircle his waist, pulling our bodies close. "Levi, what is really bothering you? We've been doing this for a few weeks, I know something more is upsetting you," I brush my fingers softly up and down his back.

"Exactly! Two weeks we've been doing this same thing in the pool and I'm not getting any better at it!" He removes my hands from his body and decides to swim with his arms over to the stairs.

I follow him of course, thinking he'll need my help walking up the steps and out of the pool. Instead, he scoots up each step on his butt and drags himself over to a chair to retrieve his towel. I watch as he sits himself onto the chair and dries off.

Carefully, I approach him. I'm at a loss for words, I'm not sure what to say that will make him feel better.

"Levi, I promise that you'll be walking again, it's just taking longer than you'd like," I cautiously tell him.

He attaches his brace, throws on his shoes and then stands up while grabbing both crutches. "Hopefully I'll walk again without crutches, but this fucking leg will never be normal, I'll never be normal, don't you understand?" He takes a few steps towards the locker room and stops again. "I'll never be able to do all the things I used to do like run or hike or ski. I can't even get back at doing my job! Who would pay money to see me in a film now? I'm not exactly eye catching anymore, only a washed-up actor forever disabled by a spinal cord injury."

"I wish you didn't think of yourself in that way, Levi. You are not washed-up. You are young and strong , you are very attractive and so much more. I don't see you as anything less."

"Well, sometimes I wish you would. Can't you see I'm only half a man, half of what you make me out to be. You are the one who takes care of me. If I can't take care of myself, how am I ever supposed to take care of anyone else...take care of you?" He turns away.

I want nothing more than to take him into my arms and show him how wonderful he truly is. He feels like he's defective, yet I think he's perfect.

This is not the right time to tell him, but I know I need to. I'm afraid of what his reaction will be. This can go only one of two ways and so far things are not going well. I can't hold back the loud sob that escapes my mouth, my body is visibly shaking with worry. I'm scared for him, he deserves to be happy...I deserve to be happy.

Levi quickly turns back towards me. "Shit! I'm sorry Love," he gently grabs my face with both hands, letting his crutches hang from his forearms. "Please don't cry," he says as he wipes the tears that have escaped my eyes.

He's looking at me and all I see is confusion & guilt in his beautiful blues. He begins rambling when he witnesses me breaking down, full on weeping.

He's searching my face for answers, "I...I'm sorry for saying all those things...I didn't mean to make you cry...I..."

"I'm pregnant Levi."