"I want it."

"No. Stop looking at it right now," you scolded. "Wade, look away."

"But, (Y/N)," he whined, stomping his feet petulantly, "it's red!"

"Yeah, and It's Phil's. It's his baby. He will kill you, and don't give me that whole 'I'm indestructible' bullshit, he will murder you in a gloriously violent fashion if you so much as touch Lola."

"Lola?!" he gasped, spinning on his heel to turn back to you. "He named his car Lola? Oh my sweet baby Jesus, (Y/N), I have to have it!"

"You need to step away!" You reached out and grabbed his arm, pulling as hard as you could to drag him away from the vehicle, but he dug his feet into the ground and held firm, his free hand resting thoughtfully on his masked chin. "Seriously, Wilson, knock it off. This isn't a challenge-"

"Challenge accepted!"

~~~

When Wade ran off towards Lola, you ran the opposite direction and straight towards the man who was about to lose his mind; you had to take the chance that you might get caught in his angry crossfire because Wade had finally gone too far and had to be stopped. You sprinted through the doors of the SHIELD base and looked frantically in each room only to find them empty.

"Uncle Phil!"

"Hey, (Y/N), what's the emergency?" Fitz called back, poking his head out from the lab doors with wide eyes. "You're scaring me just a bit."

"Have you seen Phil?"

"He's in his office, where else would he be?"

"Right, of course," you panted, taking off in a run again with a small wave back, "thanks, Fitz!" Your mind raced for a second as you started away, but you stopped quickly and turned back, pointing at him with a questioning look that made him even more nervous now. "Do you know how to break into Lola's system to shut her down without Uncle Phil knowing?"

"Pfft, right," he scoffed, "that car has so many firewalls and security triggers that I think even Coulson forgets how to start her...sometimes...wait," Fitz stopped, standing now, "what did you do, (Y/N)?"

"Nothing..."

"That didn't come out as convincing as I think you meant for it to be."

"Just nevermind, okay? Forget that I asked. I have to go." You turned and ran towards the office, but looked back over your shoulder for a second when you heard footsteps right behind you. "Fitz, what are you doing?"

"Witnessing a murder."

"Whatever," you mumbled, continuing on until you made it to Phil's office, stumbling in too fast and grabbing the edge of his desk to stop your momentum. He pushed his chair back in surprise and response to the shock, looking up at you with a new worry on his face. "Uncle Phil, I need you outside right now!"

"(Y/N), calm down," he urged, standing to take your arm, "take a deep breath."

You gave it a try, but you were far too nervous to think about breathing at a time like this. Phil was about to lose it and Wade could be long gone by now for all you knew. "No time for that. It's Lola-"

As if you had just told him that his own child was in mortal danger, the mention of the name sent him sprinting towards the bunker doors at a frantic speed that you hadn't realized that he could reach. You followed behind, along with Fitz and now Daisy once he had passed her in the hallway, each of you actually struggling to keep up with him. The impressive speed came to a complete stop once outside; you all followed his gaze upward to see his most prized possession floating overhead and a red leather clad hand waving down over the side.

"Wade Wilson, get down here right now!" you called out to him, to no response.

"Is that the Deadpool guy that you're always talking about?" Fitz whispered to you, stopping abruptly when Coulson turned with a fire in his eyes. "I'll take that as a yes," he mumbled with a cautious step back.

"(Y/N)," Phil growled, "how the hell did he get his hands on her in the first place? No one should be able to start Lola without me."

"I don't know, Uncle Phil, I'm sorry."

"Hey, (Y/N)," Wade yelled down to you, "you got any other challenges that I can fuckin' annihilate?"

"I never challenged you, assface!"

"Rude, (Y/N), just rude!" he called back, the car tipping slightly at his lack of focus on it. "I have a gorgeous face under here, thank you very much!" Wade leaned back in and looked over the panel of controls, murmuring his confusion to himself as he tried to figure out their functions; he finally threw caution to the wind and began pressing and turning anything just to see what would happen.

The car began spinning around, the jets firing in all directions and sending the vehicle lurching and turning at a dizzying speed as the four of you watched. Phil had his phone out now, frantically pressing commands into it to try to get the car to follow them, but nothing was working. "What the hell did he do? I can't break in."

"Wade! That's enough!"

"This is so much fun, (Y/N)! You need to get your sweet ass up here! I feel so alive!"

"I hope you won't miss your best friend too much, (Y/N)," Phil hissed, "because he's not going to feel alive for much longer."

"He's indestructible, Uncle Phil."

"Challenge accepted."

"Oh, god, not another challenge," you groaned quietly, rubbing your eyes in exasperation. "Listen, if I could just get up there, I could talk to him and get him to bring her back down-"

"I thought that I was your best friend?" Daisy huffed. "What the hell, (Y/N)?"

"No, I'm her best friend," Fitz added, "right, (Y/N)?"

"Seriously you guys? We're going to do this now?" Doing your best to ignore the bickering teammates behind you, you glanced at Phil, still trying to break into his own system, and up at Wade who was laughing uncontrollably once he figured out how to flip the car upside down.

"Oh, he does look pissed!" he hollered down to you. "Hi, Uncle Phil! I'm glad to finally meet you! (Y/N) has told me so much!"

"Clearly she didn't tell you enough if you've got the balls to touch Lola," he called back up to Wade. "Put my car down right now or I'll make you put her down!"

"My balls are huge, man! They take up most of the seat!"

"Gross," you grimaced, turning to accept a jet pack that Fitz had grabbed for you from the hangar bay. "Ugh, I hate these things. I can't stand heights." Gathering your nerves as best as you could, you secured each strap carefully, double checking them twice just to be sure that you were actually in properly. Fitz knew of your aversion and checked each connection as many times as you had.

When the arguing and yelling had stopped, the silence caught Wade's attention more than anything that anyone had set up to this point. He leaned carefully over the side of the vehicle, scanning quickly to find you, only to gasp aloud at what he was seeing. "No, (Y/N), don't you dare come up here!" he yelled down to you. "I didn't mean it when I said that you should! You don't do heights!"

"Then get your ass down here so that I don't have to!"

"Fuuuuck," he whined to himself, "I was having so much fun. Alright, fine," he relented, "you win! Are you all happy now?"

"Not until I see wheels on the ground," Phil replied, watching every move that Wade made with a sharp attention and held breath. "Nice and easy now..."

"Yeah, yeah, I've got this, Phillip," Wade lied, again randomly pressing controls until Lola lurched and sputtered, the jets firing and the tires shifting randomly until he finally found a way to level the vehicle out and set her gently on the ground in front of her owner. Phil rushed forward and threw the door open, grabbing Wade by the front of his suit and dropping him onto the dirt.

"What the hell did you think you were doing? Do you even realize what you had in your hands? The damage that you could've done?"

Wade gripped the hand that Phil held him with and stopped, his fingers tapping on it and growing confused by what he was feeling. He traced up along Phil's hand until he reached just above the wrist, giving it a firm twist until the hand disconnected and he found himself holding it without a body attached.

"What the shit?!" he shrieked with a startled glee. "You have a robotic hand?! That is fucking awesome, dude!"

"Give me that!"

"Nope, can't do," Wade replied and jumped up onto his feet. "This is so cool! (Y/N), you never told me that your uncle was so badass! First the car and now this! What does it do?" He took a few steps to Phil, holding the hand out but still maintaining a firm grip so it wouldn't just be taken away before he could get his answers.

"Um...well...my favorite function is this shield that Fitz built in for me." He reached out and tapped a few commands in the prosthesis, projecting an energetic shield in front of the pair. "I've only been able to use it once, but Fitz really outdid himself with it."

"Holy balls, that looks a lot like Captain Flagpole's shield, you know. Are you a Cap junkie?" When Phil didn't respond, but unable to hide the growing flush in his cheeks, Wade immediately took notice. "You are! Dude, I am too! How cool is this, (Y/N)?"

"Yeah, that's just great," you grumbled with a low sigh, taking off the pack in a huff.

"Uncle P, check this out," Wade continued, almost with a childlike energy. He gave Phil his hand so that he could reach into his own suit, pulling out a few old Captain America trading cards to show his new buddy. They were a bit worn, with a little blood over a few, but he was no less proud of them despite their flaws. "I got these at a yard sale a few years ago. Can you believe that shit? A yard sale."

"Oh my god," Phil gasped, "those were mine. I bet that's my blood all over them. No, wait," he paused, thinking back to the attack on the helicarrier when Loki had killed him. "Those weren't in my jacket. They were in my locker..."

"Then, my new best bud, they're yours again."

"Really?"

"Really."

"Hold up," you interrupted, stepping forward, your hand raised in defiance, "I thought that I was your best friend?"

"Oh yeah, how does it feel now, (Y/N)?" Daisy snorted, shaking her head with a poke of her tongue out at you. "Hurts, doesn't it?"

"Yeah, (Y/N), not the best feeling right?" Fitz added, taking a firm stance next to her.

"So Wade," Phil broke in, slapping a firm hand on his back, "how about I take you for a real ride with Lola? Show you what she can really do?"

"Fuck yeah, let's go! You don't have to ask me twice!"

With Daisy and Fitz retreating back into the bunker, it left you standing on your own to watch the unlikely pair of Wade and Coulson becoming seemingly best pals. It was a strange turn of events, going from such a pure panic of telling your uncle that his beloved possession was in the hands of a reckless mercenary, to now seeing them taking off in it, almost too happy to be together. It was confusing to say the least, leaving you with nothing more than an exasperated sigh as you made your way back to your room for a much needed rest before figuring out if you had any friends left.

"I really don't know what the hell just happened."