Hi Everyone.. Thank you for reading Illusion so far..!!!! The next episode is the last one of this series..!! Posting on Saturday 14 September...💜🫶🏻🌻😊

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I am holding Y/n in my lap... It feels history is repeating itself..!! Yet another woman that I love, admire... is being taken away from me.... My mom... my wife.. my child... I'm once again on the verge of losing all of my happiness once again...!!

Y/n's innocent face... her voice... her soft touch... her mere existence... The way she calls my name...

"JUNGKOOK..!!!!"...
Jimin screamed and I flinched snapping out of my horrific thoughts..!!
Not the voice I wanted to hear my name in...

"Get up", he shook me lightly...

"JUNGKOOKKKK.... GET UP", he shook me with a little more force this time...

'Get up'.... I know what that means for fuck sake... But I cannot get my legs to move.. My body is just frozen...

"Let's take Y/n to the hospital... The Air Ambulance is here..", Jimin informed me...

I once again revert my attention back to Y/n's face that was pale by now...

I take a couple of breaths and nod nervously..

"Come on... I know it's hard.. but you have to be strong...", Jimin encouraged me...

I know... I know that.. But when it's about her.. I lose all my power.. I am too labile..

Picking Y/n up in my arms, I walked towards the helicopter... and laid her on the stretcher...
The Emergency Medical Team took over and attached her to an Intravenous Line and and an Oxygen Mask...

Her breathing was very slowed and pulse very faint...

I kneeled next to her bed and grabbed her hand...

"You can sit at the back that's more comfortable.."
One of the nurses advised me...

"THIS IS THE MOST COMFORTABLE PLACE IN THE WORLD FOR ME", I answered without wavering my gaze even for a second....

The ride was for about 15 minutes... But for me it felt like forever..!!

We soon reached the mainland at the Hospital and Y/n was taken to the Operation Theatre...

"Jungkook, just relax... she will be fine..."
Jimin consoled me... But I just remained still, devoid of any emotions... No words were sufficient enough to calm the storm inside me...

My hands were swollen and full of dried blood but that was the least of my worries..
I leaned against the wall closing my eyes with folded arms.. Even sitting down felt like a sin when my love was fighting for her life...

I felt a hand on my shoulder making my eyes open abruptly..
It was dad...

"Everything will be okay.."

It felt as if my heart would explode any minute.. my emotions finally overpowered the devil inside me and I couldn't hold myself back..!!
I hugged him..!!!

Something I had never done in 26 years..!!!

"I don't want to lose Y/n... I've already lost mom.. I can't bear another loss", my voice croaked..

It took all my force to stop myself from getting even more vulnerable and erupt into tears...

"She will be fine son..."
His father couldn't help but feel the pain of his son's helplessness...

Hours passed but still there was no update... I did not change my position at all...
All specialists and Surgeons were running around... obviously aware of the fact that she was my wife.. I bet they were on their toes and they better be.... They wouldn't have appreciated being decorating their bodies with bullets..!!

Every time one of them left the Operation Theatre..  I jerked my body upright to see if they had any update... But unfortunately no!!
It was almost 6 hours since she was in there...

"Mr Jeon"

Finally, an hour later the Dr called me out...
With a hammering heartbeat I walked over to them...

My heart won't be able to handle anything that I didn't want to hear...

"Yes?", I swallowed...

"Your wife is showing signs of recovery"...

A slight relief washed over my face.....

"But"
The doctor stopped in the middle.......

"But.. what?"
My voice range elevated a little bit..

"Well...She is still not completely out of danger.... Her body will take some time to regain consciousness... The trauma to her back was pretty intense.. The bullet has been taken out.. luckily it wasn't lodged deep.."

A little relieved sigh escaped my lips...

"Wh..at about our b..baby????", I gathered some courage to ask...

"I'm sorry..."

My heart sank...

"We can't really say anything about that yet... You will have to wait until we do some more advanced tests..."....

The Dr walked back in..

My legs exhausted all the energy in my body and I sank into the chair...
A disappointed sigh left my lips as I buried my face into my hands...

"Fuck..!!", I groaned...

"Calm down.. Think of it positively", Jimin put an arm around my shoulder...
"At least Y/n is recovering"

And I nodded.. This was still better than no news..

Another 8 hours passed away....

"Jungkook... have something to eat... drink some water... How will you look after Y/n if you're sick yourself???", Jimin urged..

I shook my head and closed my eyes...

I was getting impatient at the wait now.. tapping my foot with anxiety..
Jimin had been sitting next to me the whole time... Dad had just gone home after I insisted..

I saw another Dr walk out of the OT towards me...

"How's my wife?"

"Good news, she has regained consciousness"....

I sighed in relief...

"Can, I see her?"

"Sorry Mr Jeon, Not Yet...!!! You will have to wait another couple of hours until her health is stable", she apologised and walked back.....

"Jungkook, do you want to quickly go and get some rest before you can meet Y/n??? I am here, don't worry..!!"

"No, I'm fine... You go!! You've been here since forever.."

"No, I will stay here with you"...

I looked at Jimin.. He has seen all my life... Been through everything with me..!!
"Thank you for staying with me through this..!!"

"Come on..!!! I am doing it for myself not you, you moron!", he slapped my biceps...

"I will teach your kid to make chilli brownies and make sure you eat them and suffer!!!"..

I scoffed a little at his tease....

Another 2 hours passed

A nurse walked over towards us...

"You can see your wife now.. But please clean yourself up first. Her immunity is very weak at the moment.."
"You can use the sterile showers next to the room and put on a clean hospital gown.. And please dress your wounds..!! They are a risk of infection.."

"Okay"
That was probably the most compliant I had been towards anyone's suggestion..!!

I walked into the shower and turned it on.. Blood.. dirt and sweat washed off me as I stood still under the cold water...

Although I had waited for what seemed like an eternity, now that I could see Y/n, I felt a strange feeling of fear and guilt curling up inside me....

What will I say to her??
How will she react??
Will she even talk to me??

Taking a firm breath I dressed myself and put on a hair net as instructed...

Y/n was lying there with her eyes closed as I walked in after sanitising my hands...

So serene... innocent... beautiful... taking slow breaths that synced with the beeping of pulse monitor.. I could've looked at her for hours and not be bored..!!

I placed my hand gently on her forehead...

"Y/n", I whispered as softly as I could...

She opened her eyes slowly and looked at me....

"Jungkook..!?"
She answered softly... My ears that were dying to be filled that voice finally felt at ease...

I held her hand gently...

"Y/n... I'm sorry... I'm really sorry for whatever happened..!! It's all my fault..!!!"

She looked at me with unreadable expressions...

"Please say something... Your silence is killing me..!!!", desperation dripped out of my words..

She took a deep breath and her lip quivered..

"Will you... honestly answer whatever I ask you???..!", her voice croaked and she swallowed...

I nodded....

"Was everything you ever did for me only for the sake of keeping it going, just so you could avenge whatever happened to your family???"

I know this was coming...
"No...", I looked into her eyes...

"Did our marriage mean anything to you.. Jungkook!?!?"

"It did Y/n... It did...", there was more raw emotion in my voice than ever...

"Then.. Why did you say all of those things..??", a little tear escaped her eye and it killed my soul...

I had always thought losing a business deal was my biggest frustration... but I was wrong.. Nothing upset me more than seeing her cry.. Especially when I was the SOLE reason for it..!!!

But.. not anymore... I was ready to be as vulnerable and as true to myself in front of her... She is a part of my soul... My life.. My love.. She is the only girl I have ever loved..!!! It's me and her against everyone.... Nothing else holds more importance in my life than her...!!

"Because... I was scared..."
I finally put my guard down... I wasn't embarrassed to use the words 'Scared' and 'Me' in the same sentence...

I continued as Y/n pondered over my choice of words...

"I was scared to accept my true feelings.... I could never think of falling in love with anyone... But I realised that you were special.. I had not once thought about my feelings or emotions... But you made me feel all of them.. life with you felt so good, Y/n... But I was running away from it.. because I was never taught how to process these emotions..!! I couldn't bring myself to meet my softer side..! Because, I was convinced it would make me weak..!!!"

"But.... Every moment spent away from you has made me realise what I was missing all these years..!! It was 'YOU'... You make me happy Y/n.. I am my true self only with you..!! I don't wear that mask of Illusion anymore when you are around!!!"

I wiped her teary eye gently...

"Then..."
I watched Y/n close her eyes and take a deep breath as if gathering courage for what she was going to say next..

"If I say... I want to leave you and start a new life by myself... Will you let me go..??"

It felt as if a thousand knives had struck me all at once... My breathing fastened... and my hand tightened around hers sub consciously as if she is leaving me right now...!!

I took a moment to let that sink in..!! She could've asked for my life.. I would've happily sacrificed myself..!!! Why would she ask for the only source of light in my otherwise dead life...

I thought for a moment fighting conflicts in my mind and managed to crack a faint smile....

"If.. that's what you want Y/n..!! I won't stop you.."

She listened to me carefully...

"I don't want you to be at a place that you dislike... or with the people that you despise... Probably me being one of them..!! I want you to be happy... I was wrong to drag you into this life where you did not even belong... You were never meant to be with someone as cruel and ruthless as me..!! You are meant to be worshipped and admired..."

"And you will never contact me.... Ever..!! Not even keep a tab on my life at all", she asserted..

It felt like my life had lost its purpose..! I was spewing out these words from a part of my brain that I didn't even know existed.. If she had proposed the same request 3 months ago..  I would've been fuming with anger.. and dismissed it off by fucking this thought of her senses showing her who she really belonged to... probably even locked her inside the room... maybe without food or water...!!! And I can admit that without an ounce of hesitation...! I am not a very understanding person when it comes to my obsession with her..!! I've never claimed to be a completely white, pure person..!! I am more of the dark soul and devil persona types..!!

But now when I think of it... All that matters to me is her happiness.. I cannot even imagine doing the above mentioned things... Probably can still fuck the brains out of her.. but not the rest!! Though I can still not guarantee me not keeping a check on her.. Some habits are harder to break than others.!! But if that's what she wants.. then I will give it to her...

I swallowed a lump of emotions down my throat...
Her absence from my life.. doesn't make it worth living..!! But I guess that's what I get for fucking all this up..

"ALRIGHT Y/N.. I WILL STAY AWAY FROM YOU, FORVER!!! YOU WILL NEVER SEE OR HEAR FROM ME AGAIN... BECAUSE YOU DESERVE THE WORLD... A WORLD THAT DOESN'T CONSIST OF ME!!!"