So . . . I'm not going to camp

I was super upset at first but my mom arranged it with my grandparents where I can still spend a week with them without my sister which means I'll be up there longer

Yeah I got depressed earlier and kept pushing my mom away even though she pushed back and helped me feel better

Anyway, I was upset for many reasons but not being able to go to camp triggered it

I just feel like COVID-19 has flipped my life upside down and I hate it. I loved having the same routine, knowing what was going to happen.

When I realized how uncertain I was of the future, it scared me

I've never been that uncertain of the future, and I don't like being uncertain

Well anyway now I can't sleep because my mom said I could wake up early on July 3rd so I can watch Hamilton before we leave

Yeah why is life so confusing? I wish I could understand my emotions better hehe . . ..