"Gotta go insane to stay sane, throw myself whole into both worlds, can't hold me down because you know I'ma fighter, carried myself into this beautiful prison..."

-ON ~BTS

~~~
For a while things were somewhat normal, Hoseok had more or less left and not come back, and Yoongi couldn't understand why Namjoon was turning him away, but he hoped it was for the best, and that Hoseok was known to pull this shit all the time. Somehow-- can't imagine how-- Taehyung had gotten himself into trouble, crazy asylum doctor type trouble, and Mrs. Park, his current unpaid therapist, was fighting for custody. He wasnt sure why his voice mattered in that situation, but it did, and she asked him to speak in the trial.

Court was....a blast. No one trusted him at first, considering everyone there was people he bullied. But Yoongi said what he had to say, and realized somewhere along the way that Taehyung, Jimin, and Jungkook were all on his side, and he should be on theirs. They celebrated together, partied together, it all felt whole to him finally.

Then came the day of the note. The note he had never sent.

He was fully aware that it had been sent the day it happened, getting a lengthy text on the phone Seokjin had bought him, the lettering printed out in sharp, bold letters.

YoU aRe GoInG tO hElL fOr whAt yOu dId !1!!!1

Yoongi studied it for a moment, thinking it was probably someone who was bitter about the court proceedings, but he couldn't really think who that might be considering no one liked Jae-hwa, and no one likes a doctor who tortures his patients with medieval practices. He would not put it past the doctor to believe whole heartedly in lobotomies, and more than likely icepick lobotomies.

"The fuck is this?" He asked himself, sitting in Seokjin and Namjoon's apartment, putting down his clothes, having decided to move out and stop sleeping on the couch. Mrs. Park had offered a "room" in the shed, complete with mini heater and mattress.

He looked up out the window, something catching his eye, and he had to double take when he saw flames starting from the kitchen, "what the hell?!" It was a grease fire, starting very quickly and building very easily, and despite how wanted he still was, he called the fire department as soon as he saw it, making way for the door, only to be interrupted by Kyung-mi running in in a hurry crashing into him.

"NO!!! Please don't kill yourself!! Please!!" She screamed, obviously shaken up and crying. From the looks of it, she'd ran here.

"What the fuck are you doing here?? We gotta-."

The fire more than likely hit some other accelerant, the flame bursting  and making a noise like a small explosion, which definitely felt imminent in a larger scale given the hear he felt at his back.

He pulled Kyung-mi close to calm her, then ran out with her, "we gotta get downstairs got it? No tears, okay?" He said, trying to stay as calm as possible so she would also calm down.

He shouldn't be surprised, I really shouldn't have been fucking surprised that Taehyung and Jimin ran into him on the stairs, full run almost and made both him and Kyung-mi fall hard onto the stairwell.

"What in the fuck are all you bitches doing?!" Yoongi exclaimed when he fell.

Taehyung, buttercup daisy princess he was, gasped and immediately ran down to help them, "I'm sorry! I didn't mean...." he never finished the sentence and just extended an arm out to Yoongi.

Jimin ran back down, "What the hell man?? You baited my sister?? I thought we were cool??"

Yoongi look up suspiciously as he let Taehyung help him up, "I have no idea what you're talking about. I didn't tell her to come over." He looked at Jimin, eyes squinted in suspicion, "either way, I'd like to get the hell out of here before the fire kills me OR the fire department beats my ass." He said and took Kyung-mi's hand again and helped her up and further down the stairs.

Taehyung was obviously upset about something that Yoongi had said, his expression going to a perplexed frown, the hamster in his brain working hard to figure something out, but Yoongi ignored it in lieu of getting Kyung-mi outside as soon as possible.

Namjoon is going to kill me for this...

When they were out, all of them couldn't help but look back at the building as smoke started to come out of the windows, the fire department still not there.

Yoongi was knocked back out of this reflection of the fire when Jimin slapped him hard in the face.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?? I thought we were cool? I thought we were on equal playing ground!! How could you set their apartment on fire?!" Jimin yelled, his face turning red with rage.

"Back that up two fucking stations? I didn't start this fire, pipsqueak, and if I did, the hell was I doing still in the building?" Yoongi asked and looked up at both Taehyung and Jimin, "I would have to be fucking cra..." he stopped,  knowing that was a triggering word in his current company.

Kyung-mi spoke up to fill the silence: "I thought you were sad....from the note....I thought this was a suicide attempt...."

Yoongi frowned and looked at all of them, "What note? I left a note? I don't even have access to fucking paper? Let alone money for paper?" He looked at all of them, all at once realizing they had been played, "don't tell me you didn't consider my broke ass would never go out and purchase paper over even hair dye?"

Jimin looked off to the side, considering. At first somewhat annoyed, then coming to realization with what he was saying and frowning. Taehyung just stared, he was good at that, and the way he realized was more a thoughtful nodding.

Jimin broke the silence this time, "Okay, okay, don't rip into us, we weren't thinking, we just got concerned..."

"You should stay concerned, who the fuck started the fire if not me??"

Taehyung went from calm to absolutely horrified, and it was evident, though they hadn't expressly said it to him, that he had a fair amount of stressors from all that he had went through with the mental hospital and Mr. Park and some other thing where he feared any amount of blood. He was paranoid, shaky at times, doing better, but at the same time not completely recovering.

You're a part of that Yoongi, you caused some of that fear, you helped it along.

"Normally I'd say 'that bitch, Jae-hwa,' but... we all know she can't do that..." Jimin says softly, thinking.

Yoongi more or less spaced out, detaching from the street corner they were standing at, "it's not over..."

"Of course its over, we won? The court case....we got my brother back....we won...." Kyung-mi says, hugging Yoongi and closing her eyes, praying that she's right about that.

~~~

Jimin had been the one to call Jin, Kyung-mi would have done it, but her emotional state just wasn't in the right place by the time they got to the bus station to take them home. Kyung-mi just wasn't good in crowds.

Jin sounded upset over the phone, but Jimin assured him the fire department had arrived and not to much damage could have been done.

Jin was more concerned with what Namjoon would think when he told him this.

"Hey, has anyone been over to the apartment recently? Someone you don't know?"

For a moment they were left with the "silence" of the bus, going over bumpy patches in the road and hissing when the brakes were engaged.

"Well, no, just..." was all Yoongi could hear over the phone.

Yoongi looked over at Kyung-mi and put his hand face up on his thigh, and she took the signal and put her hand in his, squeezing it tightly.

He sighed and looked up and out the window, "Don't be scared, whatever happens, I'm not leaving you, so don't get your hopes up, huh? You hear me?"

Kyung-mi nodded and leaned on his shoulder, and Yoongi offset his tough talk with a little kiss on the top of her head, not wanting to worry her or make her second guess this statement.

In front of them, peering over the back of the seat, Taehyung watched, eyes and nose the only facial feature of his visible.

"What's your deal, pumpkin-head?" Yoongi asked and raised an eyebrow.

"She's my sister now...so I have to make sure you treat her right." Taehyung says and sits up just enough for Yoongi to see a wide rectangular smile.

Jimin hangs up the phone and sighs, "Well, that theory is out the window, he said no one other than you and people he knew and trusted have been over to the house, much less in the kitchen in like a week. A fire like that can't be rigged to start a week earlier, and then at the exact time that note shows up, that's too many damn coincidences." Jimin looks back at Yoongi, "you sure you didn't start that fire? You seem a little...." Jimin looks at him up and down, "flamey."

"I was packing, when and why would I start a fire in the kitchen, dipshit?" Yoongi rolled his eyes.

Jimin shrugged, "I don't know man, not that long ago, you did a lot of fucked up things, I thought we were chill, but like....I can't ignore the possibility." He looks at him evenly, "Eomma says you're doing well... but we all know sometimes your perception is fucked."

The corner of Yoongi's mouth visibly twitched.

Jimin looked at him evenly, in fact, at this point, everyone was looking at him, "you haven't taken it today....have you? Bro, you have to take your meds, they make you better in between sessions, you know that..."

"You say that like I'm fundamentally broken. "

Jimin laughs, "bro, I got news that maybe you haven't heard." I said getting kind of serious, "we're all fundamentally broken, I think my mom said something like over fifty percent of the population has some form of mental illness. Fifty. Percent. And I know what you've been through, Yoongi."

Jimin gave him a look oozing with compassion, understanding, all those great mushy emotions.

Yoongi didn't have a response to those emotions, it seemed very strange to him that someone he had beaten up for money was now his friend and genuinely cared about him. I don't deserve it.

~~~

a/n
I had this written for forever and just didn't post it because editing is like a pain, so I decided not to edit it, maybe not the move??

Lmao yeah but the trial isn't important so I was planning to skip it for a while, since like, that's super important to Tae's story, but Yoongi literally just sat around that whole time so like

Yea

-Neri-