Bam's Pov

   Huh? "Oh my god! That was insane! I totally blanked that you could sing! You got so much better though! I'd say almost as good as Khun!" Shibisu blabbed on and on, but ignored him, continuing to lay on Khun. He was wrong.. Khun was way better than I could ever be.. Also Khun is very comfy too.. I stretched my arms, rubbing at my eyes. I should've taken a longer nap.. It was fun getting up there though.

    My head hurt a tad bit though, I couldn't focus in on the compliments from everyone else, getting lost in thought. Thank god the room was dim, with the light my head would be way worse. I was about to dig my head into Khun's shoulder when Rak swiftly got up, and grabbed me by the shoulders. I snapped out of my thoughts and jumped up, closing my eyes tight shut. My body tensed as I turned my head slightly. I bit my lip in attempt to calm myself down, but accidentally drew blood instead. It's ok, your be fine..

   The room silenced, I peaked my eyes open staring at a concerned Rak. "Black turtle?" Oh shoot, I stuttered. "Y-yeah?" He peered down at me, towering me. I couldn't help but tense up. His grip tightened as he stared into my soul. My chest clenched and I could feel my feet ready to bolt out of here. "C-can you p-please let go Rak? P-please.." I stuttered out. I couldn't help but be slightly afraid. As much as I could keep a straight face when someone pointed a gun to my head, I couldn't when someone towered above me, I could help but think of Rachel or Imort. The pained I had endured from them both had truly frightened me.

   He immediately let go, backing up. "I'm s-sorry black turtle.. I just wanted to make sure you were ok.. You seemed spacy.." He had concern written all over his face. Shoot.. It's all my fault. My fault. "No, no. It's fine.. I just got a little headache is all. Don't worry. I'm just tired and out of it.. I'm sorry" He nodded, giving me a heavy pat on the top of my head. "Don't apologize and worry so much black turtle. You do that to much.."

   He walked back towards his spot, plobbing onto the couch. He began to munch on a banana? He must have snuck it in.. Huh. I slowly sat back onto the couch, lightly sinking in. "Bam?" I turned my head towards Khun, him peering at me. Why is everyone doing that? What did I even do? "Are you ok..?" I hesitated at the question. I was tired, a little anxious, but besides that I was fine. "Yeah, why?"

   "You flinched." I began to stare at him as he continued, "Rak grabbed your shoulder. And you flinched when he got all up in your business. You didn't flinched years ago. What did you go through..? I.. I just want you to feel loved and safe.." He stared at the floor, burning holes into it.

   I let out a breathy laugh, holding his hands in mine. "You know, it's kinda hard being with you and not feeling loved.." He lifted his gaze, staring at me. "I love you so fucking much. So much. And that's what worries me," I slipped off the couch, sitting on the floor. I gained everyone's eye contact before beginning.

   "You guys know how much I appreciate you and how much you all mean to me, right?" Everyone hummed along, some nodding. "I just need you to know that could get you, well most likely me killed." I stood up, pacing the room.

   "What happens when one of the strongest fighters has a weakness? They either get killed, or the weakness is gotten rid of. I worry, I worry alot Rak. I worry about what if I can't save you? What if I don't have a weapon on me to protect you? What if I meet them in a open space and civilians get hurt because of me? What would happen if I went back? Would I get a punishment again? Would it be a worse one? Would I have earn my trust back? Or would I get the death penalty?"

   I turned my gaze back towards everyone. "I just need you to know. I need you to know so you can turn your back on me until there gone. Or never come back. I just.. I don't know.." I sat back onto the ground, glancing up at everyone.

   "Fuck them." I whipped towards Khun, who was lounged across the couch. "I'm alive bitches. I dare them to shoot me again. We'll protect you, so please stop your worrying.." Shibisu soon spoke up, "Yeah! Please don't worry, we'll be beside you through it all! you can always lean on us to cry or just talk.. " Endorsi than followed up. "I bet I could pierce one of them in the head with my heel. I'll stay by you to, plus if you don't have a weapon, I'll pass over my heels.."

   I couldn't help but laugh. I leaned over, holding my stomach. "I kinda want to fight White with a fucking heel now. His face would be pure gold when I pulled that out as he had his sharp katana.." I shuffled to get up, hugging Shibisu and Endorsi. I teared up a bit. It had been so long since I had actually teared up and cried.. It honestly felt relieving.. "Thank you too.. You guys are so amazing. Thank you for staying. As much as I want you all to be safe, it would get lonely again pretty quick.." They all smiled, returning the hug. We stayed there for a few minutes until I let go.

   "What time is it?" Anak spoke up, yawning. "I'm exhausted and hungry.." Hatz pulled out his phone, "It's 5 oclock.. We also didn't have Lunch or dinner yet.. I think it's about time to go home.." Everyone agreed, expect me. I didn't think this through.. I don't know where I'm staying.. Jinsung probably wouldn't want to take me back in, my apartment is definitely not there. I have enough money to buy a apartment or a house, but I can't do that in just one night. I'd have to walk to go find a ATM and maybe I could rent a hotel room..? That could work while I try and find a apartment..

   "Come on, let's drop you guys off," Shibisu spoke up, everyone agreeing? Oh shit.. What the fuck am I going to do? They do know I disappeared.. Right? Are they totally blanking right now? Or..?

   I sighed as I followed them out of the room, and down the hallway. Khun noticed my sigh, grabbing my hand and dropping back a pace from everyone else. "What's on your mind?" I turned my head, stealing a small glance at Khun. "What do you mean?" He raised his eyebrow at me, giving me that 'don't give me that cheap ass answer.'

  I sighed, "I kinda disappeared from the planet, so I have no clue where I'm staying the night.." Khun chuckled, "I thought you were going to move into mine?" He actually, wait what? "Really?" He nodded, squeezing my hand. I flashed him a cutesy smile, placing a small peck on his cheek. "Thank you so much!" He laughed, "The pleasure's truly mine, especially if I get more kisses.." I couldn't help the small smirk that had crept onto my face. "Of course you'd love that.."

   "Uhuh! That'll probably be my favorite part!" He stated proudly, beginning to march around. I couldn't help but smile, he was so ridiculous and adorable. "C'mon.. Let's catch up with the others.." I tugged along the ridiculous Khun who was smiling like a idiot. God damn..

   Me and the rest of the group piled into our cars, saying goodbye to the people who were in the opposite car. We eventually separated, driving away in different cars. The car ride was practically silent besides the light hum of the car engine, it was a peaceful and content silence. Endorsi was first to get dropped off, next was Rak, and last being me and Khun. I slipped my bag from off the floor, me and Khun exiting the car. We thanked Shibisu for the ride home and he was off. Secretly, I really enjoyed calling Khun's place home. I liked the little ring and excitement that came with it.

   The house was massive, it seemed as if a hundred windows were seen across the house. It had a beige tiling with some brown and black stone walls. The top had a dark roof tiling and his yard was a virdescent green with bushes and flowers tucked away.

   We slowly walked towards the front door, enjoying each other's company. When we made it to the door, and walked in, it was amazing. The walls were long and tall, wide windows plastered across the rooms. The kitchen and living room are the first rooms I could see, them both connected. We both slipped off our shoes, placing them next to each other's, off to the side. I had also placed my bag beside them.

   We strolled into the living room, sinking onto his couch. "You said no more secrets or hiding.. So remember when you couldn't read me earlier and I said, 'What would you do if when you showed emotion, someone died?'" Khun looked towards me, nodding, but concern was written all over his face.

   "I want to do one more thing before we talk, do you know where your bathroom is?" He shifted across the couch, pointing down a hall. "Down the hall, last door on the left," I hummed, heading down the hallway. I got to do this last thing..

   I entered the bathroom, my feet pressing against the tiled floor. I turned towards the mirror, barely a face show back. My bangs had really grown out.. I should cut it soon. I shook myself out of thought, focusing back onto task. I stripped of my sweater, folding it into a neat square.

   I stole one more quick glance into the mirror. These scars are who I am, I will learn from them, and I will accept them. I inhaled, taking a deep breath before exhaling. I got this. It's just Khun, he will love me and support me. I walked out of the bathroom, back down the hallway and into the living room. I placed my sweater onto the coffee table, sitting back onto the couch.

   I got this, I just got to speak from my heart. I could see Khun's gaze shift towards my stomach, examining the scars that covered me. "Someone had died because I showed emotion." Khun lifted gaze back at me, sincerity covered his face. Ok, shit. I feel to out in the open. I snatched Khun's hands, intertwining my fingers with his. Better.. Now I still got to continue, I promised.

   "Her name was Lily. White, Karaka, and Hwaryn, are the three people who were on the little hit man team of ours. But we all had to go fetch this married couple because they had shark loans from us. And so we all went, White, Karaka, and Hwaryn dealt with the adults while I had to deal with their child."

   Khun squeezed my hands, urging me to continue. "So I had to pretend as if everything was fine and as if nothing was happening outside her bedroom door. So I did. I lied to her, I told her I was her babysitter for a little because her parents were busy. She was six years old, so she didn't question it. So we played some dolls and played with blocks until her parents screamed bloody murder. And once someone has heard a scream, they become a witness. And no witnesses can be left behind."

   "So when I walked out of that little girls bedroom, all I could feel was guilt. She had heard the scream, she was going to die. And because of the guilt I felt, I couldn't help but let it cling onto my face. And because I had shown that guilt, I had shown emotion, she died. I never wanted to show emotion after that. So I tried not to, and it became a lifestyle almost.. I- I'm just tired of it.."

   Khun wrapped me in for a hug, which I graciously returned. I scooted up onto his lap, wrapping my legs around his waist. I snaked my hands around his neck, and laid my head on his shoulder. Once I was all comfy and situated, I continued, but starting from the beginning.

    "I had originally gone to F.U.G because they had threatened you. At first I thought it was a dumb joke. Just a stupid teen that had gotten lucky with a prank. But then it got weird. The phone number began to text me, texting me exactly what you and me had done or said. That someone was watching me. It made me frightened. And it only got scarier from there."

   "They had found my address, sent me a note that had threatened you once again, but it had your exact address, what floor your room was on and that they would slit your throat if I didn't go to this specific address. I had more recently figured out my feelings for you, so I didn't need you dying. Plus you were a well known singer with a life ahead of you, so I went. And I had met F.U.G. They gave me actual proof that they were threatening you, and that they would kill you if I didn't join. So I joined."

   I scooted out of his lap, standing up. I turned around, moving my ponytail over my shoulder. "I had gotten this huge scar as a punishment because I wasn't listening to them. I quickly regretted that. One of my biggest mistakes ever.." I then turned back around, sitting back onto the couch. I sat up straight and folded my arms outwards so he could see all the other scars. "And these ones are from either hand to hand combat, practicing with a knife or katana depending on the day, or other weapons."

   I peered up to see Khun sitting in front of me, absolutely silent. He didn't make a noise, he just stared at my scars, slightly tracing them with his thumb. A few tears streaming down his cheeks. "Are they actually that ugly?"

Khun's Pov

   After all of these seven years, he was forced into a gang, forced to learn how to use weapons, forced to kill or harm people, and harmed himself. And it was all my fault. He did it because he didn't want me to get hurt. He fucking suffered for seven years. I couldn't help the few tears that escaped my eyes. " Are they actually that ugly?"

   I picked my head up, starting into Bam's eyes. His deep honey eyes more broken then before, lightly glossed over. "Baby.. Why would you even think that?" He shrugged, "You weren't saying anything and was just tracing them. I didn't really know what you were thinking.." I tackled Bam in a hug, taking us both down onto the couch. "Baby, they are beautiful. They are apart of you, they aren't ugly. They're proof you survived. Plus you look pretty badass babe.."

   He giggled from underneath me, I couldn't help but smile. I liked it so much better when he was happy.. I placed my ear onto his bare chest, listening to his heartbeat. It was comforting in a way, the continuous thumping. It was reassuring in a way.. I stayed there for a few more moments until I eventually unlatched myself from him, lifting up my head. I peered down at him, swiping away his bangs, taking in his face. He had definitely gotten more handsome. I got so fucking luckily, such a hottie. I laughed as I placed a deep and passionate kiss on his sweet plump lips before pulling away.

   I sat up, practically straddling him at this point. I was going to shift off him when I remembered something. I placed my hands on his bare chest, slowly making me loss my train of thought. I trailed my hands on, landing onto his stomach. Holy fuck, he was like, diesel! Absolutely solid. God damn, what did he even do as a workout? He should not wear a shirt more often..

   I turned my gaze back up towards him to see one of his eyebrows perked upwards. "Yes?" Fuck. Excuse, excuse, excuse..  "Do you want to help me cook dinner?" He slightly sat up, supporting himself with his hands. "I would love to," I flashed him a cutesy smile before getting up, thank god he bought it.. I slipped by the coffee table, snatching his sweater.

   He definitely isn't getting this back! Probably not till tomorrow.. Ah, he is just going to love living here. I skipped towards the kitchen, slipping past the counter. I turned back to see Bam trailing into the kitchen, standing on the other side of the counter."Khun, can I have my shirt back? I only took it off to show you the scars.." I turned back towards him, a cheshire-like plastered on my face. "Nope! I don't think you need it, plus you look better without it!" He sighed, stretching. "What do you want me to take my pants off too.." He muttered, walking by me.

   "I wouldn't mind! Be my guest," he turned around, a small red hue on his face. I couldn't help but giggle, he so fucking cute. He turned back around, heading for the fridge. He opened the fridge, squatting down."I-is there anything specific we want to make?" I sighed, no fun.. Fine, fine.. I strolled over, peering into the fridge. "I'm good with whatever.. You can choose,"

   He hummed, pulling out chicken breasts. "Can you pick out a vegetable?" I nodded, heading for the freezer. I pulled out some fresh green beans, placing them on the counter. My eyes trailed back towards Bam who was zipping around the kitchen, searching for ingredients. Once he had gotten all of the ingredients, he turned toward me. "Do you know where the sauce pans are?" I chuckled, nodding. I reached up above the stove, grabbing a sauce pan out of the cabinet.

   I placed the pan on the stovetop, turning towards Bam, "Most of the pans are up t-" I was interrupted but a little kiss on my lips, only for him to quickly pull away. I huffed, crossing my arms. Bam had a small smile on his face, "What now?" I jutted out my bottom lip, "Only one?" He closed the space, snaking his arms around my waist. I hummed, tapping on my lips.

   "Your so greedy," he murmured, tugging at my waist, pulling me into a kiss. I wrapped my arms around his neck, deepening the kiss. His bare chest was pressed against me, and my mind was in a frenzy. Holy fucking shit. I couldn't help but smile into the kiss. I lightly flickered my tongue across his bottom lip, gaining access to his mouth. I swirled my tongue around his, marking every inch of his mouth. My chest was tight, my adrenaline spiked, and all I could think of was his sweet taste. He tugged at my hips, slipping his leg between my thighs. I couldn't help but get lustful, but sadly enough we were human, and we needed to catch our breath. He gently pulled away, but only left about a millimeter between us. A string of saliva connected our lips as we caught our breath.

   "god damn.." Was the only words that I could think of. I could feel a light tug at my pants, my lips craving more of his. Bam lifted his hand, wiping away the saliva. "Are you satisfied long enough to last dinner?" I leaned in, my lips on his.

"And if I'm not?"