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TIME HAD PASSED, and Neverland had continued to darken. What had started as odd clusters of black thorns and poison, had worsened. Nights lasted longer, stretches of trees and forests had overgrown and darkened, and the place took on a bitter smell. Kaelyn had attempted to monitor it, but couldn't do it in completion. Because on the other hand, her senses on Neverland had dulled.

No longer could she feel everything and everyone, but only some. Some notifications were delayed, and some were completely blind. The lack of control had started to scare her, as it built up over the years. She could only pin it down to age, or maybe even parts of her matured nature and personality subconsciously slipping in. It's not like there was a beginner's guide for making an island.

A former fairy named Tinkerbell had taken residence as well, living in a small hut in the middle of the jungle. Killian Jones– or as he was now known, Captain Hook– had begun to work for the island too, bringing supplies and any children he found. Kaelyn hadn't liked the idea, but Peter insisted it was good networking. The pirate didn't seem to completely hate her or Peter despite former events, but Kaelyn was starting to feel like the leader of a gang.

As she woke up that morning, Peter was already gone, as he often was these days. Over the years, their time together had lessened more every year, until they had to steal moments away. Though they both had changed, Peter had perhaps the most. He loved leading to the point he sometimes overtook Kaelyn, or suggested ideas violent or darker than anything Kaelyn was willing to do.

He had also become harder to read, more manipulative with outside forces from the main world, and overall slightly twisted. Kaelyn still saw many moments of his normal self that far outweighed the dark, but she couldn't help noticing them. Like much around her, it seemed, he was darkening beyond her control or help.

She wasn't unhappy, but things were certainly different than in the beginning, or how she had intended them to stay forever.

The lost boys were already wide awake in the camp, many now carrying weapons or having some form of defence on them. After the Jones' had arrived, Peter had insisted they should learn basic self defence, which Kaelyn had agreed with, but she suspected some of the boys liked it too much.

"Baelfire!" Kaelyn called, seeing the young boy frolicking around the fire that was cooking breakfast. He was a young boy that she had picked up from Hook a while ago, who had a happy disposition but was terribly stubborn when he wanted something.

The most interesting thing about him, however, was the fact he was Rumpelstiltskin's son. Peter had found him one day, dancing to the flute, but apparently Rumple had taken him away. Of course, he had ended up in Neverland eventually, anyway.

Kaelyn hadn't seen her very old former friend, but was most surprised he was still alive when she heard. To a point, she figured Peter had taken Baelfire, or tried to, out of spite. And she almost didn't blame him.

A part of her still seethed over her friend's betrayal, but in the grand scheme of things, such years had turned into such a small blip in her long lifespan it was almost irrelevant. To her, life was and always had been Neverland and Peter.

"Where's Peter today?" Kaelyn asked the boy as he approached her.

"Said he had work to do with Tinkerbell," he told her, looking worried by her reaction. Peter had become more responsible for some of the maintenance on Neverland in recent times, and sometimes didn't tell her about it, either. She had started many fights over it, that hadn't led anywhere useful. She was concerned about the amount of unaccounted time he spent away from her, but had no clue what he could even be doing.

"Oh," Kaelyn managed. "Alright."

Baelfire frowned. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, kid, I'm fine," she assured him. The boys were not supposed to mother her. But they had long become more mature than in the beginning. Baelfire, especially, seemed to notice more than any of the other boys. He was smarter than given credit for, and Peter was stupid for underestimating the boy, because he did.

"He said something about the heart of Neverland," Baelfire said, as Kaelyn made to turn away. She paused, eyes narrowing before she looked back at the boy, who was almost the same height as her.

"Did he say what he was going to do?" Kaelyn asked, trying to keep the accusation out of her voice. Baelfire didn't know any better.

He shook his head. "No, I'm sorry."

"No, you're fine, Bae," she assured him with a sigh. "I'll see you at lunch, okay?" She ruffled his hair before lightly shoving him, giving him a small smile as he headed off to rejoin the other boys. They had long since stopped being so excited to see her like the children they were.

Kaelyn's face fell as he turned away. Two points of power existed on Neverland. Dark Hollow housed Peter's shadow, which he had ripped off years ago to form a separate being. It was frustratingly chaotic, and didn't obey anyone except Peter, despite Kaelyn's ruling of the island. Dark Hollow at least contained it, like a time out. They had had many disagreements over the Shadow's existence and role on the island, but as usual he had won.

The second was Skull Rock. It was hard to reach, and on purpose. It housed Kaelyn's soul fragment, like the beating heart of Neverland, coursing magic throughout the island's veins from it. Kaelyn rarely visited it, as she rarely had reason to. But that day she did, just to be sure.

In a blip, she had teleported there, the waves crashing around her. Kaelyn slowly ascended the stone steps, coming into the hollowed out rock. The glowing orb of energy at the back pulsed when she got near, and Kaelyn felt reinvigorated by being so close to such a raw version of her power. It was truly remarkable.

But the brunette was interested in other things, such as the fact it had shrunk, or that she could visibly see that the energy split off in a direction she didn't feel, like an artery away from the heart. She narrowed her eyes. Where was that piece of it going? And why? She hadn't even detected it, not until recently, but it must've been leaking for a while to go so unnoticed.

Maybe that explained the way Neverland had lost some of her image, some of her control. The way the trees had twisted, the way that nighttime always seemed to be uncontrollably longer, the very existence of dreamshade. Things had been slipping through her fingers for a bit, and this must be the cause.

But how had this happened?

Kaelyn felt his presence behind her before she felt the true weight of what had happened. She turned to him, face slack, eyes wide enough to see the whites. Her shoulders slumped as she stared at him, and his face told her everything he knew.

Peter took a shaky breath before stepping forward. Kaelyn flinched, and the look of hurt on his face normally would've worked on her, but it only fuelled her emotions. She held out a hand, a finger weakly held up.

"Kaelyn," he said. Her name felt wrong coming from him now.

"What did you do?" she got out, throat tight.

"I'm sorry," he said, almost automatically.

"No," she breathed. "No," she said, louder, as it hit her, sinking into her chest and her stomach. "You... you've been syphoning my power... my soul," she choked out.

Peter's silence to the accusation was deafening. But it wasn't an accusation. It could only be true.

"Did you not think I would realise? That eventually I would come here and see it? That Neverland was partially controlled by you as well? That it wouldn't grow strong enough I could feel it in you?" Kaelyn said, all very quickly, voice strained from trying not to cry, not to break down and collapse in front of him. "And for what? Why would you do this?" she demanded, hating how desperate she sounded.

"Kaelyn, please calm down–"

"Shut up," she snapped, bottom lip trembling, as things fell into place. "Dreamshade was you, of course it was. It was your energy and intention leaking into Neverland. No wonder you lied about being cut that one time. A snake can't be poisoned by its own venom," she spat. "Everything that changed without my knowledge on Neverland... was you. It was all you."

"I couldn't just–"

"Shut up," she snapped, voice stronger now. The initial shock that had choked up her throat was gone now, replaced by a wave of anger. "How could you?!" she cried. "After everything–!" She cut herself off, swallowing thickly. "After everything we've been through... how could you do this to me?"

Peter looked at her, but he didn't feel familiar. He looked like a stranger. "I had to–"

"No! No you fucking didn't," she cut off, lips pulled back. "I trusted you!" she screamed, and the energy behind her pulsed at the action.

"Kaelyn... Kaelyn calm down," Peter said unsurely as the wind began to pick up, and the clouds above them began to swirl and flicker with indigo energy.

But Kaelyn was beyond calming, as she fixed her watery eyes on the glowing shard of her soul in the centre of the room. She stared at it, thinking rapidly as power throbbed under her skin. Peter was saying something, but she couldn't hear his pathetic excuses through the blood and wind in her ears, her whirlwind of thoughts and the rage.

Rage like she had never felt. Not even when Rumple had betrayed them. Not when Cielle had ruined her childhood, not when Ajax had touched her, not when Jones threatened Neverland. The rage flooding her system was nothing she had ever felt before.

"Tell me you didn't do it," Kaelyn spat, anger turning cold and calm. She felt the water in her eyes begin to fall. "Tell me this is a mistake."

And despite all her anger, all her pain, she still had the hope he would give her the answer she so desperately wanted. But the look on his face had already sealed their fate.

"I can't tell you that."

"You're a monster," Kaelyn snarled, angry, hot tears still collecting on her cheeks. "You've destroyed everything."

She felt cheated, used and taken advantage of. Pathetic. How had she been stupid enough to not see what was going on? How had she trusted him so blindly?

She knew why, she thought, with a sour taste in her mouth. Because she loved him. Of course she did. But she had thought he loved her, too. No one who loved her would do what he did. He couldn't love her if he was capable of such betrayal.

A lie. A manipulation. A betrayal. A false sense of trust and love. He had done all of that to her, but above it all he had hurt her. The one thing he had promised to never do.

Kaelyn tried to move, not even knowing where she would go, but in a second Peter was in front of her, trying to put his hands on her arms and hold her back.

"Don't touch me!" she shrieked, shoving him in the chest. A fresh wave of pain washed over her as she realised what he had done, and the rage was replaced with sadness once more. "You didn't just take my control, you took my power, too," she realised at his teleportation.

Peter's face frustrated her, that he kept looking so sorry but offering no explanation. He wasn't sorry. He wasn't sorry, he just got caught.

She felt her knees buckling, heart too full to stand as she slowly went to her knees, hands braced against the ground, biting her tongue to stop herself from sobbing as she collapsed into tears.

"I didn't do it to hurt you–"

"Stop talking," Kaelyn mumbled.

Pathetic. She felt absolutely pathetic. Brought to her knees by someone she had trusted and loved with the utmost parts of her. He was manipulative and cold and power hungry. How long had he been stealing her power and overtaking Neverland? How long ago had he decided power was more important than her love?

She felt him crouch down beside her, but refused to look at him. "I can fix this," he continued, sounding as frantic as she felt now.

"Please stop talking," Kaelyn bit out.

"Tell me," he asked, face close to hers. "I never wanted to hurt you."

Kaelyn finally looked at him, tears streaking her face. "Nothing could've hurt me more."

His face, his fucking face. Why did he look so hurt? Why did he have a right to be hurt by the consequences of his actions? He knew her, he knew what his actions would do to her. She shouldn't feel bad, he had brought this on himself.

Pathetic. She was pathetic.

He said something else, but Kaelyn didn't hear through her sobs as she stared back at the ground, her hands against it, feeling Neverland beating under it. She had the power and the control. She still did.

Neverland was hers. She had created it in her image and he had ruined it. But ultimately it was hers, it beat off of her energy and pumped her magic throughout it. It was hers, she had made it her home and made it a reality when she had needed it most. Peter could take as much as he wanted, twist as much as he could, but he would never have complete access to the raw and untouched power that was Kaelyn's soul.

She had the power. She had the control. She always had.

So she took it back.

Kaelyn screamed as the energy began to flow back into her, pieces of her soul returning and being absorbed again. She heard Peter yell as the energy flowed back into her, felt her body go numb a second later, like she was floating. She wanted to get away, to leave and never come back. She didn't want to be here. Neverland wasn't her home anymore.

She wanted to make it stop, make it all go away.

Neverland wasn't her home.

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WHEN KAELYN WOKE it was dark. At first, she hardly registered what had happened, until she realised how swollen her eyes were from crying, how raw her throat was, and the cold trails drying on her cheeks. What followed next was a wave of heartbreak as it hit her, as she rolled to the side and vomited, retching into the forest floor.

For a second, she wondered if she had even managed to leave, before she noticed the trees weren't as thick as Neverland, the canopy not as heavy, and there were no waves to be heard. She was lying on the forest floor, on her side, and she almost wanted to stay there, to never move again.

Pain washed over her, making her wince. Every part of her body ached, and she hadn't felt this weak ever. Her soul hurt, as she knew it must be piecing itself back together after so long. Blinking tiredly, she finally forced herself into a sitting position, teeth grit the whole time. It was dark now, and she wondered how much time she had been unconscious on the ground, how much time had passed since she had left Neverland.

She stumbled to her feet, breathing heavily through the pain, which almost seemed to give life to the heartbreak and betrayal she had felt. Never in her life had she been hurt so much, so personally and so close to her heart. Never had she been so wrong about anything, so misled and stupidly trusting.

He had loved her. But at what point had he stopped? At what point had he gone behind her back knowingly? Did he think she was stupid and wouldn't find out? Did he underestimate her? Did he think she was unfit to lead?

Someone's presence snapped her out of her frantic thoughts, as many people encroached on her. She heard them, and saw their silhouettes. Kaelyn tilted her head, not wanting to deal with this right now, as hostility bled from there.

"What's going on here?" the lead man asked. Kaelyn could just see the outline of him, as she figured dawn must be approaching.

"Who are you?" Kaelyn asked, voice cracking.

"We're the ones asking the questions," he snapped. "We are the Queen's Guard, and you are trespassing."

That meant nothing to Kaelyn, who hadn't solidly been to the main world in decades, as fear began to bubble up inside her. "Is this the Enchanted Forest?" she asked desperately.

"Stop talking or we will shoot!" Kaelyn heard and saw crossbows raised, felt her magic pulse under her skin.

"Please," she said, weakly, holding her hands out either side of her. But they didn't listen, they didn't yield to niceness or talking, and even as her hands flickered with indigo energy, they looked even more set on harming her. "Please, I don't want to do this," she repeated.

She caught the arrow that shot first, heart racing as she looked down at it. For so long she had tried to not be what was expected of her, to not be used or taken advantage of, to not be the type of person people feared when magic was brought up. For so long, she had tried to do good things with a power she had never wanted, that had only brought her pain, no matter what she did. She had tried.

All magic has a price.

And hers was that she had no choice.

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BLOOD STAINED the forest, but none of it was Kaelyn's, as she turned away from her work, stumbling into a tree as her knees buckled, soul still stitching itself back together. She felt her resolve shake, and a dry sob racked her body, fingers digging into the tree trunk as she pushed herself off it, trying to put as much distance between herself and the carnage as possible.

She had long run out of tears that day, as she felt her stomach threaten to come up again thinking of what she had done. It was her or them, she told herself. She had to. She had no choice. Not anymore.

Her boots sunk into the muddy ground as she trekked, eyes focused on the sunlight peeking through the trees. Her heart erupted as she cleared the treeline, breaking out onto an escarpment. Below her, she could see the golden edges and lines of a village, as the sun began to rise. Kaelyn lifted her dull eyes to look at it, and instinctively reached into her pocket, stiffening when she realised the stone wasn't there.

She swallowed thickly, feeling her legs shake. She hadn't been thinking, she had acted on her rage, on her pain. The betrayal... one so great she had taken back everything she had given him. But she didn't regret it, and she knew time would take her further and further away from all the pain and all the betrayal.

Never again would someone devalue or only value her for her magic. It was hers, and hers alone. For as long as she lived, as long as her soul continued onwards.

Neverland would slowly fade away without the main chunk of her soul. Peter could keep it alive for as long as he could with what he'd absorbed, but it wouldn't be enough. Eventually, it would die, and the magical properties would go to. The Lost Boys might manage to survive, if they got off the island. But Peter would die. He had sealed his fate the second he connected himself to the island and betrayed her.

Kaelyn knew that.

As she watched the sunrise alone, a final tear traced her cheek.

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surprise update!

and the final flashback chapter

thank you for almost 40k reads!