Jimin's POV

He's gone. He has left. I sobbed as I stared at the direction he went to. I was sobbing so loudly that I had to cover my mouth. I was in unbearable pain, and it only grows inside. Then, all of a sudden, I was in Hoseok-hyung's arms. I pressed my eyes shut tightly.

I don't even know how they got me inside the car. I was just looking outside the window. My mind is so blank and the only thing I feel now is so much pain. It's not a typical pain that you can just get rid of.

I've been through a lot of pain, but I still haven't learned to live with it.

I leaned my head against the glass window, blankly.

The car stopped and we're now back at my House. As soon as I stepped outside, Hoseok and Yoongi blocked my way. I looked at the two of them and bowed my head, appreciating their effort.

"Jimin—" I didn't let Hoseok finish as I walked past him. "We're just here for you. Call us, okay?" As Hoseok suggested, I ignored him and went straight inside the house.

I locked my room and leaned my back against the door. There my eyes landed on the bed, and there my chest tightened again. When I thought of him leaving earlier, this is not what I expected to happen. I thought he left because he was going to do an errand, or maybe Hoseok and Yoongi called him because they needed his help— anything but leaving.

I had no idea that it would be the last time, that the night we spent together would be the last.

"Hyung," Jungkook called to me. He patted the bed. I closed the cabinet and approached him and move beside him. He touched my hair softly, tucking it behind my ear. His hand moved down and stayed there, holding my cheek. He then caressed it and his eyes were just focused on it.

I just stared at him, watching him silently until our eyes met. I couldn't read what he was thinking now, and I couldn't help myself as I approached and kissed him. It was a quick peck, but Jungkook grabbed my neck and pulled me back, capturing my lips and then cupping both of my cheeks. I smiled and returned the kiss. It wasn't a needy kiss; he was kissing me with passion, slow and sweet— I felt my stomach flutter, I broke into a fit of giggles. Jungkook pulled away, and he looked at me in astonishment.

I put my hands on his shoulders. I shook, blushing. "Nothing." Jungkook smiled, defeated. I touched his face, thumbing his cheeks, and examined his face.

"Why do I feel like you are missing me a lot, hm?"

"That's right." He says. I laughed at him.

"I am asking you why." I pointed it out and he responded with a smile. He let go of me and flopped on the bed.

He adjusted his position and tapped it, "Come here, join me." I immediately nodded and climbed onto the bed.

I flopped on the bed and used his arm as my pillow, one hand on his chest. He touched my waist, sliding it slowly before it landed on my back. I adjusted myself comfortably and brought my body closer to him.

"Good night," he said, and I whispered it back before closing my eyes.

I averted my eyes from the bed, hung my head down, and my tears fell on the floor. I heaved a sigh, my chest felt so tight and heavy.

I sat on the floor, knees drawn close to my chest, and looked down, covering my eyes with both of my wrists as I bawled uncontrollably.

I can't believe this is actually happening to me. We were so happy yesterday, enjoying each other's company. We couldn't get enough of each other. We were all over each other, but now I am so sad, so dejected.

Everything seems meaningless and hollow.

I pressed my eyes shut tightly as pain shot through my head. I breathed through my mouth as it was hard for me to breathe through my nose. Then, I laid there on the floor, broken-hearted. I curled myself into a fetal position. I closed my eyes, feeling the pain in my heart.

I let out a sigh and opened my eyes. It didn't take long till, I saw the image of him lying across from me. He was only a form of my illusion, but it looked so real, enough to make me forget the feeling of immense pain for a second.

He was looking at me now, wearing his usual smile. "Don't cry." He said to me. I smiled warily as I watched his face.

"Jungkook-ah." I called for him, he moved his face closer to mine and adjusted his position, "Don't cry." He repeats himself. I quickly reached out my hand to cup his face, but then it got to me. My hand was reaching for nothing— my heart shattered and I felt my tears sliding down.

My lips trembled, being with him hadn't fully occurred to me. I was in the phase where I was slowly taking everything in, yet it was gone right before my eyes.

My happiness was just about to start, yet it was taken away from me. Am I not allowed to be happy? Do I really deserve this?

I'm so tired of being hurt. I'm so fucking tired. Why does it have to be me? With all of these people, why am I the one who should get hurt? And the one to be left behind?

"Why Jungkook?" I whispered weakly, "Why him?" I asked painfully.

***

I slowly opened my eyes. I shifted my position and felt the cold floor against my back. I stared at the ceiling. I wasn't fully awake yet, only staring at the ceiling as if there was something interesting up there.

And in one snap, the hollow feeling inside hits me again. Little by little, everything is coming back to me. Waves of pain and numbness washed over me. I swallowed the lump inside my throat, then I started crying again, tears descending freely. I closed my eyes as I felt the heaviness in my chest.

I covered my face with my forearm. I cried silently until I felt my head ache. I'm mentally and physically drained. I was so lost. I had no idea how I could calm myself down, how I could stop myself from yearning for him.

I want to see him, wanna hear his voice, want to hug him, I want him, just him— I placed my hand over my chest and gripped my shirt, tugging it harshly as I felt my heart crumpled painfully.

"God damnit." I cursed.

I am upset that he didn't tell me about it. If only he had told me beforehand, I wouldn't have slept and should have stayed by his side instead.

I told him and made him understand that he should tell me. At least, I was given time to take in everything, but he didn't do as I said and hid it from me— now I'm suffering with regrets in my heart because I didn't even get to hug him properly before we parted ways. I wasn't even given a chance to kiss him, even for the last time.

I was in the moment where the only thing I could think of was to beg and make him stay because I wasn't ready just yet. It was overwhelming, I didn't have much time to think. I was hysterical, I was confused, too many emotions were building in me.

"You said you would stay with me, but what are you doing? Do you not like me anymore? Do you hate me now? Are you done with me—"

"—I love you.

I love you."

I began to sob, and again tears flowed from my eyes, I didn't even get to tell him those words back...