February 21, 2013

The band and I had just gotten off the plane in London. The band had to meet up with One Direction that afternoon, but then Michael, Ashton, Luke, Calum, and I are going to drive around in the evening and look at the beautiful scenery in London. I couldn't wait. From what I already saw, London was amazing. I was just sitting in Calum's and my hotel room, watching a tv show that I discovered. It wasn't very interesting, but it was passing the time.

Later that night, once the band was done meeting with One Direction, they came back to the hotel, and I met them out in front of the hotel. It was about 5:45pm, and the sun was setting. We drove off into the country to look at the beautiful scenery in the convertible car we rented. It was amazing. I'd never expected London to be as pretty as it was. I just thought London was a city, and that was it; one with no beauty to it, just a city. But I was so wrong. It was way more than a city. It was one of the most beautiful cities I'd ever been to.

"You like it, babe?" Calum asked.

"Yeah," I told him, admiring the scenes around me.

"It's really beautiful," he looked around.

"Mhm," I hummed and looked more. We were getting close to a turn. We went to go around the turn when suddenly, a drunk driver came racing around the turn. They sped into our lane, but we couldn't get to the other lane fast enough. The other car hit our car. I saw Calum fling out of the car right beside me. Ashton, Michael, and Luke were left in the now-crumpled car. I fell onto the ground and everything went black.

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After a few minutes, I woke up. I looked down at my stomach and my arms and my legs and everything was perfectly fine, my baby bump was still there. There was one weird thing. I looked down and saw somebody that looked exactly like me, but broken. Or was that me? We had just had a crash, and I'm perfectly fine, then I see somebody on the ground that looks like me, but she's broken. Is this like a crazy dream?

Suddenly, paramedics came rushing over to me. I tried to get their attention by saying, "Hey! Am I alright? Am I okay?" They couldn't hear me, though. It was like I was living in a dream. I walked over closer to the ambulance and saw Calum. He was banged up pretty bad, too.

I saw Michael, Luke, and Ashton unconscious in the car, but they weren't hurt much. They didn't have many cuts or bruises. Calum and I were a different story. We had cuts and bruises everywhere, and suddenly I heard a paramedic who was rushing to get us all to the hospital say, "We need to get this girl and that boy over there to the hospital quick, or they might not make it! She looks like she's pregnant too.. Get the others also! They'll need tests like these two, but they'll make it."

I was terrified. They loaded everyone in the back of the ambulance, so I hopped in, and the paramedics got in, then they drove off. I said to one of the paramedics, "Are we going to live? What's going to happen!?" No one said anything. I poked them, but nothing happened. This was so weird.

Within minutes, we were at the hospital. The doctors rushed Calum and me away quickly, and rushed Michael, Ashton, and Luke away too. I ran with them to see where they were taking Calum and me. They took us in for tests.

I heard a doctor announce to another about me after an ultrasound, "Yes, she's pregnant, girl, about 22 weeks. There is a five percent chance the baby will live if she gives birth now, but there is a zero percent chance the baby will live if she doesn't live, so we will have to preform an emergency c-section." He explained to the other doctors.

They rushed me off for a c-section, and I followed. I wanted to watch my baby being born. They cut open my stomach which was not the most pleasant thing, but then pulled out one of the smallest babies I'd ever seen in my life. She was only 22 weeks. There was a ninety-five percent chance she'll die... I didn't know what I'd do then.

"She's big for only being 22 weeks along," a doctor said. That made me happy. That would probably mean she had a higher percentage of a chance of living. They had rushed her into the NICU for tests to see if she was okay, if she was healthy. They weighed her and measured her. She weighed one pound and two ounces, and she was eleven inches  long. She might seem small, but that was big for how far along she was.

After testing, they put her in an incubator. I looked in at her. That was my baby girl, broken and fragile. I cried looking in at her. I couldn't stand seeing her like that anymore, so I walked to my hospital room. I looked at my still unconscious body lying in the bed. It was right beside Calum's bed. He was unconscious too. I crouched down beside my body and whispered into my own ear, "You can do this. You have to be there for your baby."

I then walked over to Calum and said, "We have a baby girl, Cal. One pound, two ounces, eleven inches long. She's beautiful, but small, fragile, and broken. You need to stay for her..."

I then kissed his forehead and left him lay there. It was getting pretty late, so I laid down beside my body to go to sleep.

~

Weird chapter. It's hard to explain what she sees and feels and all that stuff because that's just her mind...

-Lizzie xx