Summary: We interupt this shitshow with Nick-whatever-the-fuck J Fury

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did i forget how to spell fury's name? yes.

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Fury hasn't had enough coffee for this shit (And now, he sounds like Tony).

He does not want to deal with an annoyingly insistent young adult telling him that three fourteen-year old children that look like they're fucking twelve might be a danger and threat to the adult superheroes with either superpowers, or high-tech gadjets, or advanced training that have saved the world plenty of times.

But here he is, doing exactly that.

The entire reason he was even here was because Coulson called him in. He liked Coulson, he had high hopes of Coulson, he trusted Coulson. He was being really let down right now. Should have just made Hill director.

"I'm sorry," He said, interupting Agent Johnson, "Please tell me I am not here to listen to you trying to convice me that fucking twelve-year-olds are an international threat."

"I'm not saying that they're 'international threats.' I'm saying that they're suspicious as hell. Now, if you'd just see the security tape I pulled, maybe you'll understand."

With a sigh, he pulled the laptop to his side and hit play.

"First, we need to make sure the Avengers don't tear apart." The dark skinned girl with curly hair and a green jacket said.

Fury raised an eyebrow. The Avengers tearing apart?

"Yeah, how'd that start? Peter?" The short filipino one asks, looking over to the lean one with a mop of brown hair on his head.

"Uh, the Accords. But the Government really introduced the Accords because of the accident in Lagos."

"Right, so we need to disarm a bomb before Wanda Maximoff blasts it into a building." He starts typing.

What.

"How are we going to get to Lagos?"

"Doctor Strange can portal us. By the way, we need to talk to him."

Doctor Strange. The Neurosurgeon? Was recently in a car crash. Stark contacted him for the surgery.

Portal. Superpowers? Technology?

"What if he doesn't remember?"

"Uhhh, he mentioned his mentor... The 'Ancient One,' I think. They're supposed to be the... whatever Supreme before him. They helped Professor Hulk, so we can try them." The short one types some more.

Ancient one, Professor Hulk. Were these kids making a story?

"Okay," He says, stopping his typing. "We portal to Lagos, stop Wanda from blowing people up. Accords aren't made, Avengers don't break up, crisis averted."

"Actually," The lean one interrupts, sheepishly, "Accords might still happen. I don't know, Mr. Stark didn't really like to talk about the whole civil war thing. But it looked like the team was already crumbling. It completely fell apart when Mr. Stark found out that-" He looked around and leaned in. Whispering something that the cctv didn't catch

Short-boy chokes on air and the girl's eyes widen. She whisper-yelled something but her words were mostly covered by the panicked kid hushing her furiously.

"No!" The middle was whispered lowly. "Also, hush!"

"Oka- Okay, fine, that's another thing we need to sort out."

"After the Lagos thing, we need to find Bucky and remove the winter soldier programming."

Fury stiffened, that information was classified. There is no way a couple of kids writing a story to know about that.

"How are we going to do that?" Short-boy asked. It seemed he had given up on typing.

"Oh right, we also need to make friends with Wakanda. That's the place where Bucky got help from."

Wakanda, the third world country?

Curly-haired girl took a deep breath and exhaled. She looked so close to her breaking point. "Peter, how are we going to make friends with Wakanda?"

'Peter's' eyes widened a bit, as if he hadn't thought of that. He looked down, his eyebrows scrunched up, and he pouted a little. It was almost cute.

Short-boy and curly-haired girl looked at each other, then at the puppy-like teenager again, "Nevermind, I think we have that part covered."

Peter's head snapped up. "What? How?" When he got no answer, he pouted again. His eyes drifted off for two seconds before he perked up again. "Wait! Killmonger! I remember Shuri telling me she had an evil cousin who tried to declare war on the entire world. We can capture him and somehow strike up a treaty with Wakanda."

Fury recognised the name 'Killmonger' it belonged to Erik Stevens.

Also, Shuri? A war on the world?

"That makes literally no sense."

"We'll work through it as we go on."

"Finee."

"Alright, we need to find Zemo, the guy who framed Mr. Bucky."

Zemo.

"Wait," Ned interrupted, "We can't abandon the Accords."

"What? Why?"

"Okay, the Accords that were signed were bullshit, they violated so many human rights. We all agree on that. But it was the right idea. If we kicked Ross out, then maybe we could agree on fair and respectful accords."

Ross. Everett Ross? No, Thaddeus Ross. has bad relations with Dr. Banner, more likely to have a hand in whatever this sounds like.

Why is Fury getting invested in this? These are just dumb, cringey children that drool and all that dumb stuff.

"Okay, stop, stop, stop." curly-haired girl holds up her hands in the 'time out' sign. "Ned, I totally agree with you. But, I feel like we're getting ahead of ourselves. Please remember the fact that we're fourteen. We literally just graduated from middle school. And yeah, sure, Peter's a superhero, but that will not give us enough power to change the official government documents."

Superhero. Might be a fantasy. Still need to look into that.

"Uh, the Avengers-"

"Ned," the girl interrupted, "Sure, the Avengers could give us enough political power. But we aren't friends with them yet, we don't even know if we could be friends with them. We need to start small, and then go to the Avengers."

"Start small?" Peter asked.

MJ smiled, "The Acadec team."

And then they talked about what Fury assumed were their little friends from school. He still note down the names in his mind and decided to look into the Academic Decathlon teams in New York.

"Alright. I should probably contact Fury."

He narrowed his eye at the mention.

"Dude, you have Nick Fury's number? And you call him Fury?"

Fury was sure that no one had his number.

"No? The man changes his number every thirty seconds. I'm just going to drop a few clues everywhere. Also, everyone calls him Fury. He gets really pissy if they don't." Peter chuckles a bit, for some reason.

Hill and Coulson let out a little snort at the kid's comment, which Fury quickly shot them a stink eye for.

"Wait. Why are we getting Nick Fury? I thought he was bad, I mean, he abandoned you? And dragged you into something you didn't want to do? And I thought he didn't really have many people after SHIELD was destroyed?"

Fury raised his eyebrow at the things he apparently did. Feeling the judging eye of everybody in the room, which quickly dissapeared when he looked up.

"Nick Fury always has people. I bet you ten bucks he has access to the CCTVs in this place." Peter looked at the camera and smiled, giving it a small, two finger wave. Curly haired girl and Ned looked at the camera with a cautious look.

Nick let the corner of his lip curl up a tiny centimeter. "Kid's smart."

"Yeah," Agent Johnson replied.

"Isn't that bad?" Ned asked.

"Not really. They'll probably just think we're crazy teenagers making up shit for a fanfiction or something. But as long as I do more suspicious things, he'll probably send an agent or something. Also, we sort of need him to get the glowy lady."

The glowy lady.

"The 'glowy lady'?" MJ raised her eyebrow.

The glowy lady.

"We can't say her real name," his voice dropped to a whisper, which was still caught by the cctv and he leaned in. "He'll be here way too soon if we do. Only a few people are supposed to know her name, apparently."

Only a few people are supposed to know her name.

Fury glanced at Coulson and Coulson glanced back at him.

"Okaaay," Ned said as Peter leaned back into his seat. "Alright, let's say we get the glowy lady. What next?"

Glowy lady.

"We get the guardians and they get the ravagers and," his voice dropped again, but not low enough, "Our Asgardian friends with the big guy."

Thor and Banner. But the friends was plural. Loki? Others?

"Ugh," Ned started typing again. After a minute or so, he spoke up again. "Okay, here's what I collected so far. We need to talk to Dr. Strange. If he doesn't remember us, we go to his predecessor, the Ancient One.

"We tell the acadec and the two teachers our secret, and do whatever MJ's planning.

"We portal to Lagos, stop the whole thing from blowing up. If the Accords still happen, we portal to the tower to stop the Avengers from signing the Accords somehow.

"Get Bucky Barnes somehow, arrest Zemo, somehow. Become friends with Wakanda somehow. Get the winter soldier program out of Sergeant. Barnes' head. Kick Ross out, change the accords with the power of Avengers and Wakanda.

"Somewhere in all of this, Peter contacts Fury to get you-know-who, who'll get the Guardians and the you-know-who's. And I have no idea where we go from there?"

These kids need some how-to-make-a-plan lessons.

"There are so many holes in this plan." 'MJ' finishes the last of her drink.

"We'll piece it properly after we get the acadec and Dr. Strange." Peter says and scarfs his donut down.

The video ends there.

Fury looks up at Johnson who has a smile on her face.

"Good work agent. I have to to talk to Coulson now. Dismissed."

With a non-discreet roll of eyes, she takes her laptop and walks away. So do most of the occupants in the room, leaving only him, Coulson, and Hill.

"Hill, dismissed."

Hill leaves too, with a hesitant look at Coulson.

Fury digs in his coat pocket and pulls out a rectangular device.

"'The glowy lady'." He says, looking at the pager with a half smirk.

"Yes sir."

"You remember her?"

"Carol Danvers, could never forget."

Fury hums. And then gets up, putting the intergalactic pager back in his pocket. "I want a full background analysis on the kids, monitor their every move. And make a list of Academic Decathlon teams in New York, I want the team members, former members, members being considered, the teachers, everything. And find out who the fuck is Zemo."

"Yes sir."

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Agent Johnson, as it seems, has already done all of this.

Fury wonders if she gets paid as he looks at the files.

PETER BENJAMIN PARKER

Relations:

Mother (deceased): Mary Parker, maiden name Mary Fitzpatrick.
Alias: CIA translator and data analyst.
Occupation: Shield agent.
Went into deep cover in 1999.

Killed by Albert Malik, Hydra agent, in 2005.

Father (deceased): Richard Franklin Parker.

Alias: Soldier of the United States Army Special Forces

Occupation: Shield Agent

Went into deep cover in 1999

Killed by Albert Malik, Hydra agent, in 2005.

Fury recognized them, they were working on a variation of the super soldier serum before they were killed.

Shield agents as parents, interesting.

Guardians:

Benjamin "Ben" Franklin Parker (deceased).

Occupation: Chief Electrician.

Took Peter in in 2005 after his parents' death

Killed during a burglary by Dennis Carradine in 2015. Sole witness was Peter Parker.

Well, that's sad.

Maybelle "May" Parker (alive) (current guardian)

Occupation: FEAST worker.

Took Peter in in 2005 after his parents' death.

Is now the sole guardian after her husband's death.

Peter Benjamin Parker.

Age: 14

Occupation: Student at Midtown High School of Science and Technology.

Criminal Records: None.

Previous Health Conditions: Asthma, Poor Eyesight...

Orphaned at the age of 4 and taken in by his aunt and uncle.

Topper at school.

...

Fury set the file down and picked up the other one.

Edward Leeds

Age: 14

Occupation: Student at Midtown High School of Science and Technology.

Criminal Records: None.

Guardians: Two parents.

That was very brief.

Michelle "MJ" Jones Watson

Age: 14

Occupation: Student at Midtown High School of Science and Technology.

Criminal Records: None.

Guardians: Divorced Parents, split custody.

Fury sighed, this was not helpful, at all.

ACADEMIC DECATHLON, NEW YORK.

Total Number of teams: XX

He read through the file and found out the 'Flash' they were talking about was Eugene Thompson. 'Mr. Harrington' was their supervising teacher. 'Mr. Dell' was their science teacher.

'Zemo' had seven possible suspects in the US and thirteen internationally.

He put all the files down and looked at Coulson. "Inform me immediately when they make a move."

"Yes sir."

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i watched one season of aos like a year ago. i know i did horrible on skye/daisy and coulson's characters.

have i made it too obvious that i like italics? No, i dont think so

please vote, i put too much work and sacrificed to much sleep in it