He sighed, "Even if you tell me to forget about it, I can't."

I scratched my head, and smiled nervously, "I'm sorry you had to see that. It's okay, it happens sometimes. So it isn't anything out of the ordinary."

He opened his mouth to say more, but he stopped himself, "If you're sure..."

I nodded, smiling a little and trying to change the topic, "Yeah, it's okay. How were you? Were you able to get home not too late?"

He nodded, and he blinked as if he had just remembered something, "So who was that guy that carried you back home?"

"Oh," I hummed, "He's a family friend."

He looked at me as if he was about to ask another question, but I cut him off with a smile. I didn't want him to pry and ask me a question I wouldn't know how to answer. I waved, "Looks like we're in the cafeteria now! I'll see you later."

Before he would say anything or stop me, I turned around and walked in the opposite direction to where he was going. I didn't know where I was going, but I knew that I didn't want to see him right now. This was cruel. As soon as I was alone, I sat down on an empty table and sighed, trying not to frown.

I just wasn't feeling it today.

My finger tapping against my cheek, I sighed again. I wasn't hungry. I began tracing a star on the table, over and over again. My mind began to drift to the dream I had.

The only thing I could remember was the little boy or was it a girl? I couldn't tell. No matter how much I tried to force myself to remember, I couldn't. It was so frustrating. I had a chance to remember even a small detail, and I can't.

A few years ago, I had the idea of going back to where it all began. I was around ten years old, I think, and I brought up the idea to everyone. I remember being so excited, but they all looked at me in a way I never thought I'd see. I didn't know how to describe it. Was it fear? Horror? Worry? Awe?

I started to think that's the only way I'll be able to remember anything significant at all. At the same time, it felt wrong to ask. Akito was especially worried, repeatedly telling me he'll never let me go back. I didn't understand what he meant, because he doesn't know where I came from either. Either way, I dropped the idea altogether.

But what scared me is that I don't think it was a dream at all.

While I could only remember bits and pieces, it felt like it was a lot more than that. I know, I can't remember the first seven years of my life, but it was more than that. I feel like I don't recognise a part of who I am, and that idea scares me. It was started to weigh down on me lately. If I somehow manage to remember everything, will I not be the same person?

I groaned and turned to my left, meeting Kaminari's eyes with my own. I shrieked and jumped back as he started to laugh, "I was gonna say something, but then I thought it would be fun to sit here and stare at you until you noticed me!"

I covered my face in my arms, "That's dirty."

He laughed a kind of tacky laugh, and I rolled my eyes. I slumped forwards and buried my head in the crook of my elbow, hoping to drown the rest of the world out.

How didn't I notice him? Was I that deep in thought? That's dangerous. Maybe I should only think about these kinds of things when I'm alone; I can't risk anyone else finding out.

Kyoka plopped down next to me, and I jumped slightly. Mina sat down opposite Jiro and Kirishima sat down opposite me. I tried so hard to keep a straight face, but on the inside, I was losing it. I've only just started to get somewhat comfortable around Kaminari and Kyoka. Now there was Mina and Kirishima too. All these new people were scary.

"Ah, Bakugou!" Kirishima started to frantically wave, "Come sit with us."

I didn't dare turn around.

No, I didn't want to see the look on his face when he realised what this would mean. Ever since that fateful day where Bakugou and I had our, um, miscommunication, I haven't properly spoken to him. I didn't know what I was supposed to say or do.

I have to say something?

Apologise? I don't want to. Maybe I should if it would make things easier. Right, I'll apologise. I can do it.

As Bakugou took a seat opposite Kaminari. Kaminari glanced at me, then at Bakugou and laughed, "I feel like something interesting is going to happen... Sakata! Do you have something to say to Bakugou?"

I looked at him, absolutely gobsmacked. Why did he say that, why did he say something like that? Is he teasing me? Am I meant to say something? I think I should say something. But what am I supposed to say in a situation like that? Something to Bakugou? That means he's trying to bring up how rude I was to him. But, Kaminari, what is that look supposed to mean? Oh, why am I so awkward? I really want to kill Kaminari for putting me in this kind of situation, but he helps keep me calm so I can't do that. I needed to; now that Kaminari's said it, I don't want to anymore. Why is he smiling suggestively like that? He wants to die, doesn't he? Right. I'm going to throw up all over him. Or cry. I might cry. No, I won't cry, but I feel like crying because I hate how awkward I am. I hate how I never know what to do, and I'm never confident in my decisions. I hate how I overthink every word and mess up anyway. I hate how after every interaction I have, I overthink to the point where I think that it would be better for me to just stay at home. I hate-

"Hey, Kaminari, don't do that," Kirishima chided. "We're all friends here!"

I choked back a gasp and clenched my teeth to stop myself from reacting at all.

An angel.

Kirishima is an angel.

That's the only explanation I have. He somehow has the ability to keep both Bakugou and Kaminari under control, and anyone who can do that should be worshipped. I was so glad he was here with us because if not, I'd have to have an extremely awkward and uncomfortable conversion where I'd apologize to Bakugou, even though I don't think I did anything wrong.

"Boo!"

I spun back, biting my lip to keep myself from screaming. Sero caught my arm and grinned, "Gotcha!"

I started mumbling under my breath, avoiding eye contact. Why does he always do this? One of these days, I'm going to stab him, and I will watch as he slowly bleeds out. Then laugh.

He wedged himself in between Kaminari and me, smirking when Kaminari started to loudly complain. Everyone started to laugh and began to talk about nothing in particular. Thinking back on it, I can't remember what we talked about.

Kyoka nudged my shoulder, startling me a little. She gave me a lazy kind of grin, "Don't be so nervous all the time. It's okay to loosen up and stay what's on your mind. Learn from Kaminari."

Kaminari choked and sprayed water all over the table, causing Bakugou and Kirishima to jump out of their seats. Bakugou yelled, "What the fuck was that for?!"

Kaminari glanced at Kyoka and I with wide eyes, "Did you just say I should burn??"

"What?? No! Not everything is about you!"

"Well, it should be."

Sero snicked, "You're way too narcissistic when all the girls you've hit on stare at you like you're a cockroach. Remember when Momo almost slapped you?"

"Gah?!" He looked shocked like he couldn't believe what he was hearing, "Not true! I hit on Sakata, and now we're friends! She even lets me hug her! See?"

To be honest, I don't remember what happened after that. Well, little conversations like these didn't matter when it came to everything that happened next.

Kaminari gave us his impression of a chipmunk, and I giggled.

Okay, maybe they did matter.

~~~

"Is this really what UA is like?"

I glanced over at Mina, who was dramatically clutching her chest. Jiro shrugged, "I didn't know what I was expecting. But, to be honest, I don't mind something like this."

I didn't know what I was expecting either. To be honest, I don't know how I felt. I couldn't get my head into this whole idea of school when there's just a massive gap in my life. I thought going to school would help me learn something new about myself, or give me a little clue about anything, but I guess I had high expectations.

It wasn't that I wasn't enjoying myself, because I was, but there was just something missing, and I don't know what it is. I was nice making new friends, and it was nice being more independent than usual, but it wasn't enough.

"Well, UA isn't a normal school after all!"

Is that why?

I waved them goodbye as my mind began to wander.

I don't know, and it's driving me crazy. I mentioned this before, I don't remember when, but I tried going to school when I was a little girl one time. I freaked out and attacked Kousuke, screaming about needed to run away. I just thought if I was finally able to go to school, I might remember why I acted this way.

But UA isn't a typical school.

Does this mean the school I went to was standard? And that's why this isn't helping? I don't know, it really doesn't make any sense, and it's troubling me a lot more than I thought it would. I was started to get a headache.

All of a sudden, I really wanted to remember everything that happened to me. It wasn't like I didn't care for all these years, but there was just something in my that was so desperate to recall everything that had happened, the good and the bad.

As we were nearing the gates, I recognised the figure of a man leaning against the side. He arms were crossed, and his eyes were half shut as if he was trying to keep himself awake. He was wearing black cargo pants and a white t-shirt that stuck painfully close to his body. I watched as he began to tap his foot, growing restless. He sighed and pinched his nose, getting frustrated.

I was conscious of other people still around, so I didn't want to show how happy I was or make a big deal out of it. Putting on a deep voice, I spoke under my breath, "Kanemaru Kousuke?"

He jerked upright and whipped around towards me, his soul leaving his body. When he saw it was me, I grinned, and he sighed, but couldn't help the smile on his face. He nudged my forehead, "If you were anyone else, I would've accidentally stabbed you or something."

I smirked, egging him on, "Accidentally?"

He pretended to think about it as a childish smirk slowly grew on his face, "If it was Tomomi or Akito, it couldn't be on accident."

I laughed, and then stopped after realising something. All of a sudden nervous, I started twiddling my thumbs. I stiffened, and the smile was gone, "Why are you back? Wait, why are you here? I thought you would've gone with Akki. Are you telling me he's all alone?"

He tried to smile, but he looked too tired for it to reach his eyes, "You just realised?"

I ducked my head down into my scarf, "Well, I was pretty happy to see you, so I only realised when you said you would stab Akki..."

He smiled and ruffled my hair, "He went alone this time. It's a pretty important mission, and he's good at the stealth stuff. If I went with him, I would only slow him down, and we could risk screwing everything up." He glanced at me, and I was trying so very hard not to look worried. He ruffled my hair again, "Don't worry, he'll be okay. He's the strongest out of all of us and... I would hate to go up against him."

I shuddered at the thought, "You're right. Akki is terrifying sometimes."

He put a finger to his lips, "This is a secret from him, okay? Don't tell him we said any of this."

"I know, I know." I smiled again. He was amazing. He somehow managed to reassure me and cheer me up at the same time, "He promised he would tell me all about it when he got back."

Kousuke stopped walking and stared at me, wide-eyed, "He did that? Are you sure?"

I stared back at him, "Yes? Why? Is it that big of a deal?"

He scratched the back of his head, "Well... yeah! It's a bit shocking, but I get it. Maybe he thinks it's about time you know. I'm not gonna tell you anything though!"

I mock glared at him, "I thought Diamonds were supposed to be a girl's best friend."

He blushed and covered his entire face with his hands. In a strangled voice, he shouted, "Don't call me that!"

I laughed in triumph, and he grumbled under his breath in annoyance, his face still slightly tinted pink. He grabbed my hand and pulled me into a supermarket, his embarrassment seemingly gone as he had a hard glare on his face, "We're shopping."

"But why? We have food at home."

"Unhealthy food. God, looking through the kitchen was an absolute nightmare and disappointment."

"And who is going to cook all this food we're going-"

"You."

"Yeah, that's what I- wait a minute, what?"

He pointed his finger at me, "Youuuuu."

He then grabbed me against my will and began to drag me down to the pits of hell, starting with the pasta aisle.

~~~

My exams are over. School is over. My entire A-Level qualification is over...

That's kinda sus

This means I'll publish a lottttt more I'm very excited!!

Ryuu being all awkward sat with everyone is 100% when I meet new people like it's sooooo bad I hate meeting new people irl I'm so awkward and nervous it's a sight to behold

Hope everyone is doing well!