Fandoms: Kamen Rider Gotchard

Summary: With Seina's reintroduction into his life, Houtarou's deepest darkest secret is at risk of being exposed. How can he avoid Seina's advances when he's toeing the line between keeping that secret safe? And would its exposure lead to the worst possible outcome?

HCs Used: Acearo Ichinose Houtarou

Crossposted on AO3

Ichinose Houtarou couldn't remember when he realised he had no romantic or sexual attraction towards... well, anyone, but he did remember when he decided to himself that it was his own little secret. Everyone around him would have told him that sooner or later, he would find his lover, but Houtsrou was quite certain he would never. Plus, how could he tell his mom when she definitely expected him to get married?

And so, even though he knew what he was, he still kept that identity hidden. Never to let it surface again...

In hindsight, he had noticed Kudou being weird, but it took him a while to realise that it was how she expressed herself.

But then again, Seina's return was... less than ideal. Houtarou knew that Seina had already expressed her love for him multiple times, and the fact his mom had encouraged her didn't help. He really didn't want to have to reject her multiple times again...

Still, sometimes he really wished he could say no. How had he gotten wrapped up into becoming Romeo for the drama...? He'd rather it be Kajiki or Kudou. Seina's eyes were already bright as she wrapped her arms around his shoulder. He really couldn't do this, he had to get out of here!

"Ichinose? You okay?"

"A-Ah, yeah, totally!" He reassured Kudou with a shaky smile. "I just remembered I needed to go back and help my mom!"

"Oh, then I can come along! It's been so long since I've seen Tamami-san! Wonder if she remembers the promise she made to me early on..." Seina remarked.

He didn't miss Kudou's eye twitch, and somehow wrenched his arm away as he said, "Sorry I really need to go, it's busy today and it's better if she wasn't distracted!"

"Huh? Houtarou, are you okay?" Sabi-sempai was the one who seemed to sense it, but he shook his head with a smile, a fake one at that. "I'm fine! I'm just going to go, byeee!!"

If he ran faster than Steamliner did, no one brought it up.

At least until Renge said, "Did Treasure Boy seem uncomfortable, or is it just me?"

"I mean, I get what you mean. He sounded very frantic, as if he wanted to get out of the situation as soon as possible," Sabimaru said with a frown.

Seina blinked. "He did?"

But that did make Rinne think. Her senpais brought up a good point. What was going on with Ichinose...?

"Hopppaaaa!" Hopper-1 nuzzled Houtarou's cheek as he sat in his room, sensing his discomfort. "Hoppa-hoppa?"

"I'm fine, Hopper-1, I just..." He trailed off, sighing. "Seina was a friend of mine after Fuga-san erased my memories, and it was around that time that I realised, I didn't like anyone. I don't... I don't think I'll ever get in a relationship like those around me, and yet... I have to deal with Kudou and Seina..."

"Steaammmm!" Steamliner rolled onto his lap, making him chuckle. "You guys are the best. I just... I don't know how to tell Seina I don't like her. She's already expecting us to get married or something, and Kudou, she wants SOMETHING, but I don't know what it is."

"Hoppa hoppaaaaaa!" Hopper-1 insisted, as if telling him that he didn't have to force himself to like someone, but he shook his head. "I don't want to ruin everything I have with my friends. What if this makes them hate me?"

"Steaammliner!" the locomotion Chemy seemed angry at the thought. "Steamm!"

"Okay, okay, you have a point. Maybe I should tell them. One by one. I'll have to start with Seina, huh?"

"Hoppa!!!" "Liner!"

A smile formed on his face as he got up. "Alright, time to find her and let her know!"

... What he actually walked into was...

"How did it come to this?!" He yelled while dodging the Malgam's ice attack.

Atropos shrugged, even though the smirk on her face indicated otherwise. "I just did what Rinne-chan wanted. She wanted Seina out of the way."

"She can't have!" He argued heatedly, sounding angry for once. "Why would she want that!?"

Her answer... stunned him to his core.

"Love," she said as she twirled her fingers. "Is that what you humans call it? I suppose she wanted you all to herself, didn't you, Rinne-chan?"

His head swiveled over to the aforementioned girl, kneeling on the ground. She avoided his gaze, but it was hard not to figure out what was going on...

Houtarou's own attacks ceased, eyes widening. "Kudou, you... you like me?"

"I..."

"You like me ROMANTICALLY?" He repeated it, his tone growing more horrified with each word. "Why would you...?"

"I-Ichinose?" That seemed to surprise her, but she didn't... deny it.

He took a shaky breath. What? WHAT?

Suddenly, the option of telling them was... it vanished away like mist. He wasn't sure how Kudou would react to finding out he didn't like anyone, how ANYONE would.

Would they shun him away, like how most people did?

That actually, it terrified him.

No no no no, the one thing he had been trying to avoid, all this time, keeping silent about everything, not telling ANYONE, suddenly, it could be the one thing that hurt his friends....

"No... no no no no no..." he stumbled back, detransforming as he gripped his head. "Why, why, why? Why don't I..."

"Oh?" Atropos' eyes seemed to light at this.

"Ichinose?!" Kudou sounded surprised and worried now. Crap, crap, crap, he had to get away-

"Hold him there."

Next thing he knew, he was grabbed by the Malgam and held in place while Atropos strolled over, even humming to herself.

"Wait! What are you doing!?" Kudou screamed.

She chuckled. "Now that I think about it, what better way to make the one who killed my father pay... than to turn him into his biggest nightmare?"

"W-What?"

She looked up at him, throwing the Gotchardriver away as she smiled innocently. "You seem scared. I can't wait to watch you drown as all the others had."

From her hand...

Houtarou's face drained of colour.

The... The...

"NO!"

Atropos strapped it onto his waist, and looked into his eyes with a smile. "Say the magic words, please."

He screamed, trying to avoid anything, anything but those dreaded words. He had seen Sabi-senpai, he had seen him suffer! He couldn't-

"Say. The. Magic. Word."

It was like someone's will was being forced upon him, and Houtarou's mouth moved on its own.

"Hen... shin...."

He was thankful that they managed to break him out of it through Kudou getting the idea to destroy the Dreadriver once and for all, but... He knew he had to answer for what had happened back there.

And so he waited on the rooftop of his school, looking out to the horizon as the sun set.

"Ichinose?"

"Kudou!" He turned around, giving her a strained smile. He was still recovering from the energy draining the Driver had done to him, but he would be up and running with a good night's sleep. He just needed... to deal with this first.

"Houtarou!" Seina soon joined them. Thankfully she had had her memories erased, but...

He inhaled, still feeling tired and anxious. He didn't know if they understood the concept. He was... scared, but if he didn't do this, if he didn't take this step, how could he reach for his Gotcha? He had to conquer his own fears first to encourage others to break their own mold.

"Ichinose?" "Houtarou?" Both of them sounded worried.

He looked up to them, and leaned on the wall as he asked, "Do you guys know what aroace means?"

Kudou looked completely lost, but Seina's eyes widened. "Houtarou?"

"It's... an LGBTQ term, and it refers to the fact that I don't... feel romantic or sexual feelings towards anyone. Even now, I don't feel it." His throat constricted. "I know you guys like me, and I'm really happy. But... I don't feel the same way, and I'm sorry."

Realisation dawned upon Kudou. "So the reason..."

He nodded somberly. "I can still do the play, sure, but I wanted to make it clear that I... I don't feel that way to any of you, and I don't want you guys to fight or hate each other over it. I know Kudou had just started opening herself up, and Seina just got back, but..."

"... How long?" Seina asked.

That caught him off guard. "Huh?"

"How long have you known?" She repeated.

"Since... I was a kid, before you left."

"I... Wait, so all this time, you felt... Houtarou, I can't believe you didn't tell me!" She snapped. "All those times, you felt uncomfortable, and yet..."

"I didn't want to burden you..." he protested weakly.

She surged forward, and hugged him. "You idiot! I can't believe you!"

Kudou looked at him, a small gentle smile on her face as she nodded, and Houtarou felt his tears emerge. They... They weren't angry...

And he spotted Hopper-1 and Steamliner watching from nearby, making their cute cheers in a hushed volume, which only made him laugh.

For the first time in a long while, Houtarou felt understood. He felt like he could embrace who he was, and he... he loved that.

(When the rainbow showed itself after the rain of despair and sorrow, Houtarou smiled from within the suit he and Nijigon had created together. Sure, he didn't like people the conventional way, but at the end of the day, that was who he was. Ichinose Houtarou, Kamen Rider Rainbow Gotchard, touching the rainbow's spectrum on the prism, and he would show the world that you don't have to like someone romantically to be normal!)