"Okay, so Luqroi and Gilox are on their way now. After I broke Luqroi's spine, who regenerated from that, OBVIOUSLY!" Langnos said

"This is most fortunate! The last report regarding Luqroi's fate I've ever got was during the War of The Bloodthirster!" Lorgal said with a small smile, "He fought the most substantially-sized Space Dragon that's ever threatened this part of our rule I've ever seen. The Red Space Dragon, the crimson tooth menace, The Bloodthirster, who drank the life-force of our soldiers much like we drink smoothies on a Sunday afternoon,"

"Strange name for a flying, star-shit lizard. Usually, when Space Dragons have names, the names are only there to high-light their identity, as the utter apex of their RICKETY GARBAGE FRATERNITY! Like, for instance, Dragon King Goldload Marsmaster," Lincoln said

"Or Kingboss Tailjupita!" said Wamududes

"Or Stargaza Planeteata!" Langnos suggested

"Or Teethbita Cometchasa!" said Cosudishi

"Or Gashmash Weedstasha Banana-Slam-mam-tab-maram!" a random priest said

"Or Big Blue!" Karsdasha said as everyone looked at him like he killed a child. Of course, Lincoln could only moves his single glowing eye, being a golden skeleton in-bedded into a wall with a throne made out of dragon skulls and titanium, "[Minuscule Snicker]" Cosudishi snickered

"No, I swear! That one is completely real! I was reading a book called 'Louder Death on Planet Lily' about how the youngest sister of our Lord, King, God-King, and Ruler of All, Lord Lincoln, went to fight a bunch of Space Golbins and completely decimated them all without as much as a single breath! Check page 19 of the book! I swear to you, it is right there, I PROMISE!" Karsdasha

"First off, you cannot read! You keep forgetting this," Lincoln said

"My glorious overlord, I am determined to learn!"

"I prefer The Bloodthirster as a name, for the Bloodthirster was just that; a Bloodthirsty Space Dragon," Lorgal said

"Please do inform me more thoroughly of Luqroi's reappearance in the 2nd millennium" Lincoln asked his seventh son, Lorgal

"I... will do this," Logal said as he had a flashback, "In the 2nd millennium, Luqroi existed! During that time, the lands known only as 'The No Living' was being fought over by Orcs riding atop Giants and Goblins riding those Orcs atop Giants. But Luqroi beat the ever-living shit out them much like a father would a red-headed step-child," he said as he looked at Langnos

"I never beat him! And he's not a step-child! Stop making fun of your younger brother, before I turn your piss-colored armor into piss!" Lincoln shouted

"I meant nothing by it, I'm just saying... you should've been more disciplined with him,"

"I'M FINE THE WAY I AM NOW!" Langnos screamed

"The only reason why father didn't beat you was because you where the middle-child, like him,"

"BACK TO THE STORY AT HAND!" Lincoln shouted, making Logal cough

"Y-yes, where was I? Ahh, yes," Logal said as he coughed again, "He kicked them out and made the land his own. Many years later, I'd say about 50, the descendants of those Goblins, Orcs, and Giants came back in an effort to fight every single life form that wasn't them... Luqroi preceded to beat the ever-living shit out of them again... this repeated about 2 more times, in 50 year intervals. But then, at the 160-year-mark, those heretics decided to attack the City of Petal, a land of which Luqroi insisted upon defending with his life,"

"Petal... that sounds familiar. Wasn't that when He, Larrus, and Lortion (last of which had previously fallen down several flights of stairs), conquered together and named together as part of the 154th Expeditionary Fleet of which was sent to scout a section of universes by Aunt Lynn?" Langnos asked

"Yes, but first he lit it on fire"

"Ah... well shit,"

"That's not hamstringing the horse straight out of the box or anything. [More Minuscule Snickering]" Cosudishi commented

"The human tribes upon the planet had come to worship the Elves as if they were gods, equivalent in power to you, Father," Logal said, "as not only that, they saw them as their saviors. A behavior Luqroi could not allow,"

"And thusly, Luqroi had the planet turned into a Promethean Sun!"

"TITLE DROP!" the priest shouted

"Who is this NORMAL and WHY DID YOU LET HIM IN?!" Wamududes screamed. Logal simply rolled his eyes as he continued on with his story, "As a I saying... After setting the planet on fire, killing all its inhabitants, Luqroi swore to protect the world with the same ferocity as he would his own homeward," he said

"Quick question? Why is the planet called The City of Petal when it was a planet?" Karsdasha asked

"That's because the entire city spanned across the entire planet. Granted, a majority of it was a Wild-Life preserve, much like the Native American Preserves of our own home world, but that's a story for another time,"

"Really? My eighteenth son? Preserving a world of charred corpses entirely out of guilt is a very Luqroi thing to do," Lincoln said, making Langnos nod

"But when the Space Dragons and the decedents of those who got their asses handed to them, decided to attack 1,500 years later, Luqroi returned to the planet to uphold his vow. And as Luqroi was beating the Orcs, Giants, and Goblins to death with their own body parts (much like the DOOM video games you talked about, Father), the Inquisition found out about his reemergence," Logal explained

"Did they confuse him for a massive demon and virus bombed the planet?" Lincoln asked

"No." Langnos deadpanned, "They attempted to force him into Leading the Imperium,

"IT IS ALWAYS ONE WAY OR THE OTHER!"

"After the Space Dragon threat was tea-bagged and abolished from Petal, Luqroi joined the Imperiums forces, lead by an Imperial Fist, one of my sons... Slaughter,"

"Wait! I have a grandson?" Lincoln asked

"Yes, you have many of them,"

"But you named him Slaughter?"

"Amazing name." Karsdasha commented, "A total action-hero he was. 'I AM SLAUGHTER, GREATEST HERO OF THEM AAAAALL~'!"

"This is true. But we are speaking of Luqroi now." Logal said, "Recognizing the Bloodthirster as the Gold Hoarder of this entire operation, Luqroi decided to mount an assault upon it's headquarters. A section of galaxy forged by the matter of the Bloodthirsters victims, known as 'The Crimson Stars'."

"Oh, wow, The Crimson Stars, huh? Seems like the Space Dragon spores weren't properly disposed of. Really proves that the fucking Space Lizard Furry genome can make it through anything!" Langnos said as he was getting irritated, "Even toxic emissions from absolutely fucking atrocious family reunions! AND NOT EVEN LUQROI COULD QUITE REGENERATE FROM THOSE!"

"I suppose the Bloodthirster was a sort of descendant of that one Gold Hoarder Lorus threw from a tower. Remember that?" Karsdasha asked as everyone remembered the time Lorus elbowed dropped a Space Dragon and dropped kicked it out of a tower

"Only. FUCKING. LORUS!" Lincoln said

"Truly an inspiring moment," Karsdasha said

"Stop distracting me and I shall conclude the tale of Luroi's fate," Logal deadpanned

"Please do. You fetid white-haired little goblin," Lincoln commented

"You're one to talk, but back to the story at hand... Luqroi faced the beast alone, but even with his unquestionable extensive muscles, he was unable to kill it, they were too evenly matched. Ultimately, Luqroi made a desperate attempt  to rid the galaxy of this star-pattern menace. He sacrificed himself by sticking his hand into the Space-Dragon's mouth and blocking the orifice of which the Dragon used to breath atomic fire through. The end result was that of equivalent to a black hole generator, but in reverse," Logal continued

"So a giant-ass explosion that ripped apart the fabric of reality, much like I did when I passed gas when I had a functioning body?"

"*Sigh* Yes. Luqroi saved the Imperium after the explosion from one substantially sized issue... For a time. Then it came back... and there were 6 others. The War of the Bloodthirster was weird."

"This... Wow, yes, this does make an uncomfortable amount of sense. The energy from the Space Dragons are enough to both create entire universes and destroy them, much like, let's say: 'Gods of Destruction'. The fact that these Space Dragons get the same energy from a single placed called the 'Dragon Throat'," Langnos said

"Phhhhh, 'Dragon Throat', what a name!"  Cosudishi laughed

"This could only mean that Luqroi literary bathed his entire being in the powers of demi-gods, of which has the souls of the Space Dragons deceased," Langnous explained, "evidently, upon his recent return, the results have been... uh... Well, when I last met Luqroi, I could not help but notice that he wasn't... quite... the same. I mean, none of use are quite the same, I've become a herald of chaos, and I've got the wings of a fucking Parrot out of my back,"

"I'm still me," Logal commented

"But he is a special case,"

"My daily 5 minute mirror gazing reinforces this,"

"What do you mean, Langnos?" Lincoln asked as his son looked away, worried. Langous then took a deep breath as he said: "I don't mean to worry you-"

"SAY THAT AMPLIFIES MY WORRY!"

"Remember how soul fusing is a thing?"

"Yes," Lgoal said

"Uh huh/ Yup/ Sounds gross," Cosudishi, Karsdaha, and Wamududes said

"OF COURSE I REMEMBER, YOU LITTLE SHIT!" Lincoln shouted

"See, I think part of the Space Dragon souls from the 'Dragon Throat' energy plan might've bonded some of the souls of the deceased Space Dragons ... might have... fused... with Luqroi's mind. He has these little... fits, you see,"

"SO MY SON IS NOW A FUCKING HALF-SPACE DRAGON?!" Lincoln screamed, shaking the entire milky-way

"Uhhh, yessss?????" Langnos said as he shurgged

"FAN-FUCKING-TASTIC! ONE BOY IS HALF-DEMON AND ONE IS FUCKING HALF-SPACE DRAGON!  WHAT AN ABSOLUTELY WAY TO GET AN EXTENDED FAMILY!"

"By my, VICIOUSLY SLATHERED FORESKIN! Our brothers-in-law are Space Dragons!" Wamududes said in shock as the random priest from before vomited onto the floor

"Would you imply the Primarchs are our brothers?" Cosudishi asked

"Step-brothers, maybe?"

"The whole concept of family is losing its appeal by the second," Karsdasha mumbled

"Hm," Cosudishi huffed, "Hey, Langnos, ever heard of 'wincest'?" he asked as a giant ghostly hand appeared and grabbed him

"DELETE!" Lincoln shouted as he erased Cosudishi from exsistance

"Oh no," Wamududes stated

[Well, this is what happens when I'm bored]